I know what sex is, what is illegal sex?
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YOU CAN NEVER KNOW WHETHER YOUR THOUGHTS WOULD CHANGE TOMORROW BECAUSE OF THE HIGH VOLATILE NATURE OF THE HUMAN PSYCHE.
Speak for yourself, Jonny.
My opinion of my partner may change, and with that my committment to her, but I do not see how that makes a written contract necessary. All I need to do then, is to break the contract through a divorce (in fact, all i need to do is tell my partner i don't want to see her again and it's over). There is nothing wrong with that whatsoever. I'm sure you agree.
what is wrong is if I want to stick with my partner, but I fool around with another woman just for the pleasure, and don't give enough attention to my partner because of it. that is wrong.
Getting to the actual matter, does it deserve legal punishment? isn't it something private? what I did was morally wrong, but i did not actually take away anyone's freedom, or anyone's rights, or anyones property.
We cannot start punishing people for hurting others' feelings. Or can we? You are yet to give me a decent argument.What Savage carrot said, about the punishment being for adultery in public, makes a little more sense, but it still has huge holes in it.
So, my question is, is it is legal punishment? or a personal punishment?
I think this is where the infamous "beating wives" verse would come into play. I would punish my partner by leaving th e bed, by seperating, until the problem is solved. What is your opinion of this understanding?I will reply to the rest of your points later. I have been too busy playing God of War II. But I think the above is pretty much the crux of the issue.
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Peace "phoenix",
Speak for yourself, Jonny.
My opinion of my partner may change, and with that my committment to her, but I do not see how that makes a written contract necessary. All I need to do then, is to break the contract through a divorce (in fact, all i need to do is tell my partner i don't want to see her again and it's over). There is nothing wrong with that whatsoever. I'm sure you agree.JK- The stameent in parathesis is where you went wrong again. Yes you break the contract if you dont get along and you should. I never claimed otherwise. But the piece of paper will not be torn apart. You former partner as well as you as well as the database will keep the info so tht if a child gets born or an STD occurs no one can shy away from responsibility. This is my pt dont u get it?
what is wrong is if I want to stick with my partner, but I fool around with another woman just for the pleasure, and don't give enough attention to my partner because of it. that is wrong.
JK- Did i say tht this was right? But if by fooling you mean mere fondling without the actual penetration with repsect to the other woman then its a morl issue which i agree is also wrong.
Getting to the actual matter, does it deserve legal punishment? isn't it something private? what I did was morally wrong, but i did not actually take away anyone's freedom, or anyone's rights, or anyones property.
JK- In one case explained above yes its moral. In the other case its legal because you would/could then shy away from responsibility making legal pursuit difficult.
We cannot start punishing people for hurting others' feelings. Or can we? You are yet to give me a decent argument.
JK- OH MAN, WER NOT. brickwall Wer punishing those who shy away from reponsibility.
So, my question is, is it is legal punishment? or a personal punishment?
JK- I think ive made both cases clear now.
I think this is where the infamous "beating wives" verse would come into play. I would punish my partner by leaving th e bed, by seperating, until the problem is solved. What is your opinion of this understanding?
JK- The problem is the misinterpreation of the word "daraba" whose root doesnt even mean beating at all(bro Arnold has mentioned this before). It can mean to seprate in the context or to have pleasureful sex and i personally go for the latter. This makes sense because first you admoish then youll seprate for a while, then as slowly and gradually more and more passion builds up you have a very pleasureful time. Thereafter your much more able to dicuss the issue over again and the problem/conflict is most likely solved. Theres no beating whatsoever. GOD Bless!
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What Savage carrot said, about the punishment being for adultery in public, makes a little more sense, but it still has huge holes in it.
Lets discuss these orbs of nothingness then.
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peace SC,
Hole #1 How do people know that the couple they are seeing is not married? or IS married?
Hole #2 If we punish them, there will be a trial, wouldn't people find out about it anyway?
Well, that's two, maybe their not "holes" exactly but they are things that I need cleared up.
What I think is that it shouldn't matter who a person is hanging out with or sleeping with, it's a private matter. There isn't a punishment for someone using drugs or drinking or smoking in public.Jonny, today we have something called DNA tests, which can determine the parents of a child, no need for a written contract to determine parenthood. In fact, a contract can actually be decieving in finding out who the father is because I can have a contract with one girl, and have a child with another without a contract. So a contract is not only useless, it is actually really bad evidence.
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Hole #1 How do people know that the couple they are seeing is not married? or IS married?
The law exists so that the social scene remains intact. That means married or unmarried you cannot have sex in front of others given that the possibility of reporting said situation exists. This can be used in cases for example, where a married couple decides to put on a porn show for others (live action or not) and you basically can't do anything about it unless four people witness it and complain/report. I've previously discussed this with bro Ayman and it coincides with verse 243 which says that that those who commit "zina" do not marry except one who commits it too. So even when married, they are still considered "zani" and "zaniyat".
Simple rule, don't do it, sex is private, not in the open and shouldn't be a commercial enterprise. Secondly, given the amount of freedom in the verses, the four witnesses who see it live then report it if they choose to, it's pretty open.
Hole #2 If we punish them, there will be a trial, wouldn't people find out about it anyway?
Er, find out about what exactly? You can only punish them if they are seen by witnesses in the act.
What I think is that it shouldn't matter who a person is hanging out with or sleeping with, it's a private matter. There isn't a punishment for someone using drugs or drinking or smoking in public.
It's a private matter unless you bring it out in the open and witnesses start getting involved. Using drugs and other things such as that are left open to deal with as the authorities choose. Anything that harms others should be dealt with and not everything that harms others is listed, we should use our own discretion in matters left unspoken.
I don't see anything wrong with the concept but if there is a problem with the punishment itself i.e. lashes as opposed to fines etc, that is a seperate topic. Peace.
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Peace "phoenix",
Jonny, today we have something called DNA tests, which can determine the parents of a child, no need for a written contract to determine parenthood. In fact, a contract can actually be decieving in finding out who the father is because I can have a contract with one girl, and have a child with another without a contract. So a contract is not only useless, it is actually really bad evidence.
JK- You still dont get it do you. We cant just go around performing DNA tests. It is expensive and also one must know the father to take a sample from him otherwise it is useless. Moreover the contract serves as a database where ppl have a tendency to be with more than one woman during their lives. It then becomes easy when somebody enters a new contract for the new partner to look at the past no of partners which the one has or should have a right to before making a decision. Also the government, which is or should be US, can use the databse in case one decides to shy away from repsonsibility by running off unidentified. GOD Bless!
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Peace "phoenix",
There isn't a punishment for someone using drugs or drinking or smoking in public.
JK- Ofcourse theres punishment for one using drugs in most states of the US and also most European countries except Holland. As regards smoking tht too is banned in public and theres a heavy fine except for lazy Germany whove yet to consider this law. As for alcohol tht is a bit more difficult as small amounts maynot immediately lead to violent or uncontrolled behaviour so more scientific research is needed in this area but bans were discussed on a TV program ere in Germany reg. tht as well. GOD Bless!
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Alright, Carrot, I get it. It is SEX in PUBLIC. thanks for having patience with me.
Jonny, dude, you keep talking about technology and scientific advancement and going to another planet, but when I mention DNA tests, you say "they're too expensive." You just gave up on science because it doesn't fit your beliefs.
About using contracts to determine the father...well, a woman can sign a contract with you, and then go around having sex with male prostitutes. Unless you find out about her antics, when she gets pregnant from one of those gigolos, you will have to pay for the child. This is why a contract wouldn't work.
If you have a simple DNA test, we'll know for sure who the father is.
But let's say you are vigilant and you find out about your wife's secret sex life, you would still need to do a DNA test to determine which of the guys she slept with is actually the father. -
Peace,
Oh My God, what a mess really.
I feel so disgusted that we heading to this level now, I mean that there seems to be a lack of morality and trust among spouse.
Maybe it is indeed close to the day of judgment afterall -\
Maria
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Peace "phoenix",
Jonny, dude, you keep talking about technology and scientific advancement and going to another planet, but when I mention DNA tests, you say "they're too expensive." You just gave up on science because it doesn't fit your beliefs.
JK- brickwall brickwall brickwall Phoenix, DUUUUUUUUUDDDDE, why dont you understand what im trying to say. I never said we shouldnt use DNA tests. On the contrary im all for it BUT how will you perform a DNA test if the man whom you are to test against the child aint there and you dont know who it is? Dont you see the point your missing?
About using contracts to determine the father...well, a woman can sign a contract with you, and then go around having sex with male prostitutes. Unless you find out about her antics, when she gets pregnant from one of those gigolos, you will have to pay for the child. This is why a contract wouldn't work.
If you have a simple DNA test, we'll know for sure who the father is.JK- Again i told you im all for a DNA test and it should and must be used as an additional test. Theres no doubt here.
But let's say you are vigilant and you find out about your wife's secret sex life, you would still need to do a DNA test to determine which of the guys she slept with is actually the father.
JK- And here we go again where did you read in my posts that i denied the use of DNA tests? What i said is that we cant use them without any reason testing random ppl for whom we have no clue tht they did anything otherwise we might just test the entire world. GOD Bless!
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peace,
If a child is born, we ask the mother who the father is. Out of the possible candidates, one must turn out to be the father. Maybe we should have DNA records of everyone, so that the parents are identified. It all depends on whether you want to put your trust in a piece of paper or want better evidence. As I have shown you quite clearly, your argument that a written contract solves the problem of people shying away from the responsibility of raising a child doesn't work. -
Peace "phoenix",
peace,
If a child is born, we ask the mother who the father is. Out of the possible candidates, one must turn out to be the father. Maybe we should have DNA records of everyone, so that the parents are identified. It all depends on whether you want to put your trust in a piece of paper or want better evidence. As I have shown you quite clearly, your argument that a written contract solves the problem of people shying away from the responsibility of raising a child doesn't work.JK- I agree tht a contract alone may not be sufficient but it sure makes things hell lot more easy especially when a woman doesnt remember who shes been with because she been with so many which happens also. What if the guy is a mystery man who seduces a woman for one night and then wonders off with his identity unknwon? Again the same problems and no DNA will help. It all becomes very dificult to pursue the person. GOD Bless!
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peace to you all
i have not read all the posts, especially the long ones, as i find it difficult from dyslexia, so please excuse me if i am repeating what someone else has said.
i have been seeking the truth on this matter too. there is a verse that might help us here
5101 O you who believe, do not ask about things which, if revealed to you, would harm you; and if you ask about them after the Qur'an has been sent down, then they will become clear to you. God pardons for them, and God is Forgiving, Compassionate.
Does this mean that if we ask about unlawful sexual intercourse, then it will be made clear to us? i hope so.
Also important, i feel, is this verse
37 He is the One who sent down to you the Scripture, from which there are governing verses; they are the essence of the Scripture; and others which are similar. As for those who have disease in their hearts, they will follow what is similar from it seeking to confuse, and seeking to derive an interpretation. But none know its interpretation except God and those who are well founded in knowledge, they say "We believe in it, all is from our Lord." And none will remember except the people of understanding.
Does this mean that we should not try to interpret 'unlawful sexual intercourse' for ourselves?
Also in consideration on this issue, i have taken this verse
2185 A month, marked by heat, in which the Qur'an was revealed; as a guide to the people and a clarification of the guidance and the criterion. Therefore, whoever of you witnesses the month, then let him fast therein. And whoever is ill or traveling, then the same number from different days. God wants to bring you ease and not to bring you hardship; and so that you may complete the count, and glorify God for what He has guided you, that you may be thankful.
so it is a guide, a clarification of the guidance, and the criterion. so if the Qur'an is clarification of its own guidance, doesnt this mean that the answer to 'what is unlawful sexual intercourse' should be contained within it?
Also is this verse
1854 And We have clarified in this Qur'an for the people from every example; but mankind was always most argumentative.
So can we find any examples in the Qur'an from which we can gain clarification on this issue?
finally let us remember these verses
20113 And it was such that We sent it down as an Arabic compilation, and We clarified in it some of the warnings, perhaps they will become aware or it will cause for them a remembrance.
20114 Then High above all is God, the King, the True. And do not be hasty with the Qur'an before its inspiration is completed to you, and say "My Lord, increase my knowledge."so let us not be hasty to come to conclusions before God has inspired us to understand, and let us pray to God 'My Lord, increase my knowledge' as we are instructed.
that is where i have gotten on this issue so far.