Hitting kids
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Lol dude,
Why would a kid deserve to be hit? If you agree with the video than you hitting the child is making him/her a slave, a procrastinator how could you! Hahaha
Well slaps can work, I dunno if I can see myself hitting a kid. It may not entirely be a ?bad thing? but I believe it?s how you raise them that matters. i.e. teaching empathy at a young age facial expression can show that, you smile when you are happy, frown angry etc. try frowning at a kid and see their reaction and smile and see the reaction. Being stern in your speech is another way but only when necessary, children can get an idea of emotions.
Think of adults who laugh at their kids for swearing, they?re just giving positive reinforcement for the child to continue doing it, good luck to them when their child gets older. But there is no perfect guide on how to raise children. Because parents (or whoever raises the child) are the kids first teacher, they need to be super cautious of everything because one way children learn is through imitation and reinforcement.
What does hitting a child actually do? Even if you explain it? The idea of hitting them is to exhort power over them, so you don?t have to deal with whatever it was they did and so you scare them from not doing it again. Besides you teach the child to hit, they might try hitting the adult back but eventually realise it won?t do much but if they hit their siblings/peers I?m sure it might be hurtful/useful to exhort their own power. Personally if I ever have children I don?t want to raise them with the idea of fear. I?d rather be an explorer/facilitator with them and guide them to the best of my ability.
That scenario is such an exaggeration lol and a bit lame, like the father just throw the bag back where it came from, didn?t even say anything and then the kid went crazy.
Anyway if the child was younger, I?d let the kid have a tantrum. If I wanted to be smart I?d just leave it and when buying the groceries get rid of it. Though if I planned to go shopping with a kid or kids I?d let them know first. I take my nieces and nephews sometimes. I think a good tip would be to be prepared. Anyway what I always do is limit their choices generally they don?t ask for big things they just want lollies(candy) so they all get a limit of 2 lollies each but everything is agreed upon before we go shops so if they say but can I have this, and I say no or give a lil explanation they understand.
Once though, my niece wanted colouring pencils and she picked out a set and it came with a book. I said ok though she wanted to open it then and there but I told her no. she got so upset and said ?I don?t like you? and sat on the floor and started crying lol. I talked her through it (I?ll explain if you like but this post is long enough as it is).
Sometimes a polite no doesn?t work, sometimes a no needs to be firm/stern. Also maybe your cousin could be trusted with some money. It might allow them to value and learn how the system works and learn some maths while they?re at it. I think it?s a good idea to plan to go shopping specifically with the children for the children so they learn. Otherwise it?s like forbidden fruit a haven of all sorts of awesome things and they can even touch it! And you?re telling them they can?t have it? Off course they?re going to be angry.
So possibly teaching the kids to save, count use their money to buy and calculate things isn?t such a bad idea.
I wouldn?t go to bathroom and hit the kid, what a waste of effort P I?d say we talked about this earlier you can only choose 1 thing or 2 or whatever you agreed on. Or let?s see how much money you have, let the kid take out their wallet/purse count the coins and say you have enough money to buy it are you sure you want to spend it on this?
A child?s best interest is themselves, adults/parents are their heros and they like making their hero?s happy. put yourself in their position it?s like being given a ticket to a fun park but the ticket is limited to only entry no rides, so all you can do is watch? How lame and unfair. You have no money so you can?t buy anything one might think what a waste of a trip.
Lots of things influence what a child becomes, I don?t believe hitting or not hitting is the deciding point P
wow what a rant! sorry lol Peace )
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Salaam, peace everyone,
Just wanna give my little o here
Any kind of "sanction" will work positively only after the kid comprehended his/her fault.
Before such understanding/comprehension is reached, the kid will only experience the "punishment" negatively.So stop, or much much better, prevent children from doing harmful things--i agree on that-- with one condition parents must do it cleverly. Use tips/tricks/snippets from child psychology experts. Hitting or showing emotional outburst is only signs of the parents' lack of intelligence in educating their children. Leaving the children untreated is just as bad. Parents must be patient.
OP
True. In the form of nightmares, subtle/hidden fears, traumas or insecurities. Even Oprah watchers would know this. Apparently there is one hadith that i very much suspect to be genuine (or at least it must have been originally uttered by a very wise human)When the Prophet SAWS was holding a baby, the infant peed over him until his clothing got wet. The mother (Umm Al Fadl?) pulled the baby (harshly) from the Prophet's lap. Then he said "This (clothing) can be cleaned with water, but the baby's heart, who can clean it?"
(sorry can't find the source atm, though one said it's in Bukhari. translation is mine, not from Arabic)Re ?the rod? to be "allegorical" (i.e. no belts, hickory switches, paddles, and the like) i may have something to support that from AQ
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Well. No finding about "hitting kids" in AQ, actually. The closest to "how to strike a family member of yours" i can get is 3844. Take in your hand a "bunch" and "strike" her with it and do not break your oath.
a "bunch" (ا A handful of herbs mixed together, fresh and dry. A handful of twigs of trees or shrubs or of the fruit-stalks of the raceme of a palm-tree. Whatever that is collected or bundled together and grasped with the hand.
a "bunch", a "handful" of herbs/grass/twigs/shrubs. Try it. Compare it with a full-length rod or belt or Indiana Jones' style whip. (hey, i meant try it on yourself, not that poor kid)
Even with something as important as Salat, we are ordered to command/enjoin our family with patience, not with rod. (20132)
Peace
Don't try and use a twisted Ayah to carry on with a regime of oppression san,
be a peace loving individual, thanks.
3844
"And take in thy, hand/benefit/possession/ favor/ generosity the confusion, and strike it and break not (thy oath)." Truly We found him full of patience and constancy. How excellent in Our service! ever did he turn (to Us)!See its wasn't beating up the person but rather sorting out the confusion.
God Bless.
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Actually Sarah, In the Video He never says that the Parent shouldn't still be an Authoritarian figure.
He actually Even Says that After the Child is in Time out, Questioned Him and ask his Preferences of Punishment.
He Still Condones the presence of a Punishment, he just then later gives an explanation to the child and Questions the child if that Method of Punishment has worked.He says....
"So, Do you know why I put you in time out?
Do you feel that Time out is working? Do you Like Timeout?" Etc etc...I think this Psychology could work. you Child is Acting Bad, and wont stop so you Spank him really good.
He Crys and then when he stops you go over to him and ask him
Do you know why I spanked you? Why dont you go ahead and Tell me why you think I spanked you
Child Sobbing "because I was being bad and wasnt listening to you and disobeying orders.
Yes, You are very right. so now Why where you disobeying orders?
I dont know...because I wanted to Do this, even though you didnt want me to do it.
Do you know why I dont want you to do this? I dont want you to do this____ Beacause _______________.
So when you disobey me, It is my reaction/Consequence to then figure out ways to get you to stop doing that and obey me Because I dont want you do do that and then get hurt or in trouble.So, DO you feel that Me hitting you is a Good way to make you stop? If you think it is Not a good way...Then Tell me...What would be a good way to get you to listen. WHat is your Preference? Would you like me to put you in Timeout? Yes or No? How about take away your Play time? or how about no candy? You see son, the way this relationship works is like a 2 way street. You and me must work togeather.
If you make me happy, Ill make you happy, If you make me sad...I will make you sad.
If you Do something bad, then that means I will now have to hit you and give you a punishment, BUT if you stop doing that action, I will then in Turn Give you a Reward. So what do you think about this?Child thinks for a moment...and will probably agree since, he does in his essence want to please his parents. And then Hopefully be a Good Boy and listen.
yayOk, so what do you think about that then?
laugh
btw i am not a parent, so...I dont know if what I say holds ANY value at all. lol -
lol i can't imagine such a scene. i can imagine it going in one ear and out the other. would you speak like that to a 5 year old?
i'm not a parent either, i've worked with kids but it don't make me an expert.
i'll tell you something though, a lot of kids response to "do you know why i hit you/gave you time out/etc" would be "i don't know"
peace
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haha yeah, I know.
I've got to admit, I think kids are really cute, Id probably really soft..lolThey are funny though. Now, what I said would probably have to be for a more mature toddler...idk if 5 is able to understand.
I know that little kids though I am talking about like 3 are probabily okay with hitting.Like forinstance, i seen some parents talk to the little 3 yrold and tell them not to touch something dangerious...
and of course the curious kids will. But then the parent will slap the kids hand. and then the kids will be like "WOAH! Im not going to touch that"...Slapping I feel is like a Simple minded punishment. They are able to Quickly and simply understand Slap=no.
Take a Dog for instance, I mean, You dont Hit you dog and tell me "NO!"?
From what I seen, when people Potty train their Dogs, they Do that and it seems to work pretty well.
A dog will understand..."Geez, i better not do that again or ill get hit." and then end up not doing it.If they do, surprisingly they KNOW they did something wrong and will go hide...because theyll look at you with the "Oh Sh**" face and go hide. lol
So, Id say Hitting is Okay with small children. the older they grow the less hitting you do and more Logical Explanation/punishment you do...
Agree?Key Note, Why do Kids always say "I dont know"...its like they act dumb on purpose. They Know what they did. I remember when I was in school, I used to do the same thing at like 7... I remember Id say "I dont know....and look at the ground."....I think they DO know...they are just Ashamed (obviously).. damn kids! laugh
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Hitting can work I just think other options should be considered.
I?ve learnt some things about child development/psychology so I?d rather use diff techniques and avoid hitting. But I have that knowledge other people would go for hitting. People go with what they know/ what always has been and if they don?t procrastinate maybe even read up about things and try that.
Dogs aren?t human
So, Id say Hitting is Okay with small children. the older they grow the less hitting you do and more Logical Explanation/punishment you do...
Agree?That could work, consult with your partner everyone has diff views/theories go with what you both agree on ?cos not everyone is the same and not everyone will agree.
Key Note, Why do Kids always say "I dont know"...its like they act dumb on purpose. They Know what they did. I remember when I was in school, I used to do the same thing at like 7... I remember Id say "I dont know....and look at the ground."....I think they DO know...they are just Ashamed (obviously).. damn kids! laugh
That?s not always the case. While a kid might do something which in an adult point of view is stupid, crazy, unsafe etc. the child might be thinking ?oh wow, what?s this, I wanna try that? the child could simply be exploring and learning through ?experience? and basically an adult yelling/hitting might make them think but I didn?t do anything??
But off course you have smart aleck kids who might lie or run a muck
salam
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Don't try and use a twisted Ayah to carry on with a regime of oppression san,
be a peace loving individual, thanks.
3844
"And take in thy, hand/benefit/possession/ favor/ generosity the confusion, and strike it and break not (thy oath)." Truly We found him full of patience and constancy. How excellent in Our service! ever did he turn (to Us)!See its wasn't beating up the person but rather sorting out the confusion.
God Bless.
What do you mean, carry on with a regime of oppression? I have no such intention. )
Thanks anyway, because i noticed my mistake Take in your hand a "bunch" and "strike" her with it and do not break your oath. There was no "her" in the verse. Previously i thought it was a very soft but gentle move (i.e., the emotional message/expression carried without causing any physical pain), considering how they left him (if i got the story right, that is). I still don't get the complete picture but let me take the possibility that it has nothing to do with striking the wife at all. All the better then.
So my correction would be
Re ?the rod? to be "allegorical" (i.e. no belts, hickory switches, paddles, and the like) i may have something to support that from AQ
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Well. No finding about "hitting kids" in AQ, actually. Even with something as important as Salat, we are ordered to command/enjoin our family with patience, not with rod. (20132)
Doubtful content removed. Thanks and pardon me for the confusion. Be a peace loving individual, aye, i want to.
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So what do you do in this Situation?
I was Observing my Cousin and this was my Conclusion.- The Child Wants an Item.
- After a Calm and Polite "No" and a Valid and Simple Logical Explanation why the Item cannot be Purchased, The child still done not Understand, or Rather He MAY understand, but your Valid Logical Points mean nothing to him because His Want is much more Important in his eyes than what you have to say.
3.He KNOWS that He Depends on you to Buy the Item, and He KNOWS that Making a Public Scene will embarrass you in front of everyone, So he Intentionally Threatens to scream and embarrass you unless you give in to his requests. (like a Bank Robber holding Hostages)
4.He Starts Screaming and making a Scene and wont stop until you give in.
You can try to talk to him, explain why you cannot afford it, explain why it is better to not have it, but anything out of your mouth is insufficient at this point to him.
SO what do you do Then? Just let him keep screaming...(Hes going to later be angry at you and hate you for neglecting his wants)...
I would rather, Tell him from the beginning why he cannot have the item.What age? The kid wants what he sees. Why let the kid see what you don't want to get for him?
In fact, I know I am going out on a Limb here...but ....I think Actually Perhaps...NOT Hitting your children could be detrimental.
There are some children Who have NEVER been Hit...and they have grown up to be very Spoiled, Egotistic, and even Possibly Ironically Rebellious and a danger to society in some ways.Wile other children who HAVE been hit a couple times when needed, have grown to be respectful humble people...
Assumption or Where Is The Logic In That?
Slapping/Hitting is of course the quickest and easiest, but is it relevant? Even just plain outburst without hitting is just not relevant.
FYI, i got a nephew too, 2-yrs old (though more like 3-4 if you talk to him). And before him, a niece of mine had problem with uncontrolled behavior and temper-tantrums as well. The problem with forcing kids to conform to our wishes is that with each conflict, more force is needed . Just like addiction (more dose, please). So yes, the niece is now more silent with the force of a father she can't beat. Civilized behavior--at what cost? I have no idea.
I know that little kids though I am talking about like 3 are probabily okay with hitting.
Like forinstance, i seen some parents talk to the little 3 yrold and tell them not to touch something dangerious...
and of course the curious kids will. But then the parent will slap the kids hand. and then the kids will be like "WOAH! Im not going to touch that"...Slapping I feel is like a Simple minded punishment. They are able to Quickly and simply understand Slap=no.
First, I'd minimize dangerous situation. Preparation/prevention is worlds better than "conflict management".
Second, on unexpected situation, I would grab the kid's hand, not slap it. Then while still holding the hand (if he/she unleashed a temper tantrum, then wait until it wears off, with his/her hand still held gently in my hand), i'd make myself much more calm than the kid (neutral face and low, gentle voice), then i'd begin the "explanation". Complete with animate example, illustration (use your head, lips, hands, fingers, body, whatever it takes to explain).
It works for us. This, however, will only work with the person the kid is listening to, so if you don't have that covered, you must work on that first. In my experience, maintaining physical/skin contact while gently communicating the important message, works worlds better than than trying to explain the why's after giving a short momentum with a slap/hit (strong, mild or whatever).
I'm 100% sure the method above won't work with dogs, unless you're the parent of one (or you speak their language).
If they do, surprisingly they KNOW they did something wrong and will go hide...because theyll look at you with the "Oh Sh**" face and go hide. lol
And i'm sure you don't want the situation above (text in bold) happens to your kids.
So, Id say Hitting is Okay with small children. the older they grow the less hitting you do and more Logical Explanation/punishment you do...
Agree?With little children who got used to hitting, the older they grow, the more hitting you'll need to maintain the expected effect. At some point in their life (young or old) the chain must be broken, for them to live without any hidden fear. So why procrastinate until then?
Key Note, Why do Kids always say "I dont know"...its like they act dumb on purpose. They Know what they did. I remember when I was in school, I used to do the same thing at like 7... I remember Id say "I dont know....and look at the ground."....I think they DO know...they are just Ashamed (obviously).. damn kids! laugh
They fear the consequence of saying the truth. This happens on any punishment-based culture/tradition, i think. Don't forget that even kids can predict the future just by reading your face. And your voice, gesture and anything to do with your presence. In short, they as human beings sense other human beings.
What if i challenge you to try no-hit approach to the kids near you?
Peace peace
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Peace,
The mother should discipline the children otherwise it may happen as during this Eid party a while back a little boy was running around unruly and as the mother tried to grab him, all of a sudden the kid slapped her (hard!).
Personally, would correct them right away before they get to their mid-teens; example, while coaching a traveling youth soccer team had my 12 year old nephews along and after getting up to contest a call, soon as I turned around the spoiled one quickly sat in my chair. I asked him nicely to get up; he refused saying
?You snooze you lose!?
Instantaneously pulled him by his ear out of the seat and told him unlike his parents, I will slap him in front of all the people. Anyway ever since that incident he immediately offers his seat in the presence of elders tells his siblings to also get up.
Reminds me of the story of the troublemaker youth?
1874 So they set out until when they met a boy, so he killed him?
1880 And as for the boy, so his parents were believing, so We feared that he oppresses them (with) tyranny and disbelief.
1881 So We intended that their Lord substitutes (for) them better than him and correction and closer (in) relation. -
Peace,
The mother should discipline the children otherwise it may happen as during this Eid party a while back a little boy was running around unruly and as the mother tried to grab him, all of a sudden the kid slapped her (hard!).
Slap or get slapped! << (?)
to me it only shows that something's already wrong during the normal days.
Personally, would correct them right away before they get to their mid-teens; example, while coaching a traveling youth soccer team had my 12 year old nephews along and after getting up to contest a call, soon as I turned around the spoiled one quickly sat in my chair. I asked him nicely to get up; he refused saying
?You snooze you lose!?
Instantaneously pulled him by his ear out of the seat and told him unlike his parents, I will slap him in front of all the people. Anyway ever since that incident he immediately offers his seat in the presence of elders tells his siblings to also get up.
With all due respect sir! That must have been a very important chair!
... but i thought of something funnier handcuff / tie / duct-tape him up to the chair so he could have it for the day. Of course i'd let the team participate peace
P.S. are you a soccer player?
Reminds me of the story of the troublemaker youth?
1874 So they set out until when they met a boy, so he killed him?
1880 And as for the boy, so his parents were believing, so We feared that he oppresses them (with) tyranny and disbelief.
1881 So We intended that their Lord substitutes (for) them better than him and correction and closer (in) relation.o >> kill the troublemaker youth! << wait... for "Khidr" only.
peace
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Peace,
Reminds me of the story of the troublemaker youth?
1874 So they set out until when they met a boy, so he killed him?
1880 And as for the boy, so his parents were believing, so We feared that he oppresses them (with) tyranny and disbelief.
1881 So We intended that their Lord substitutes (for) them better than him and correction and closer (in) relation.& ..........the quran says.......No it doesn't though, just a stupid translation..thank God yay
Here is what i meant
http//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=9599213.0
peace
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& ..........the quran says.......No it doesn't though, just a stupid translation..thank God yay
Here is what i meant
http//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=9599213.0
peace
) i've read that, simple. but is that all? your response to "killing a boy"?
...and i get the "regime of oppression" remark for translating "striking with a bunch of grass"! Do you get your head straight today? (Hey!) laugh
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Slap or get slapped! << (?)
to me it only shows that something's already wrong during the normal days.
He slapped her hard in public and yes during normal days because he was spoiled and knew he could.
With all due respect sir! That must have been a very important chair!
Wasn?t about the chair ? rather about the attitude, the smirk, the language used, and disrespect shown.
Would've done the same over a glass of water or a tooth pick. The item was not the issue.
P.S. are you a soccer player?
Yeah -- soccer, boxing/martial arts, chess, ping pong, pool, golf, physics, supercomputing, history, and a bit math ? lol
o >> kill the troublemaker youth! << wait... for "Khidr" only.
Who mentioned anyone called by that name?
& ..........the quran says.......No it doesn't though, just a stupid translation..thank God yay
Here is what i meant
http//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=9599213.0
peace
If you disagree with what is written in Qur'an then that is your issue. Also before calling things stupid suggest reading in context starting here 1865 where the reason is clearly explained?
so they (both) found a worshipper of our worshippers?
qala lahu moosa - said to him Moses?
He said "That you will not be able (to have) patience with me."
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so he killed him...And as for the boy, so his parents were believing, so We feared that he oppresses them (with) tyranny and disbelief. So We intended that their Lord substitutes (for) them better than him and correction and closer (in) relation.
...that explanation what you were not able (to have) patience on it.
peace
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i've read that, simple. but is that all? your response to "killing a boy"?
...and i get the "regime of oppression" remark for translating "striking with a bunch of grass"! Do you get your head straight today? (Hey!) laugh
I like it the way its screwed peace
But it is worth using the dictionary such as "the quranic dictionary" or the one by lanes.
But if you don't want to investigate- its probably not worth the effort, but saying that i am glad i did.
Good hunting.
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He slapped her hard in public and yes during normal days because he was spoiled and knew he could.
Wasn?t about the chair ? rather about the attitude, the smirk, the language used, and disrespect shown.
Would've done the same over a glass of water or a tooth pick. The item was not the issue.
Yeah -- soccer, boxing/martial arts, chess, ping pong, pool, golf, physics, supercomputing, history, and a bit math ? lol
Who mentioned anyone called by that name?
If you disagree with what is written in Qur'an then that is your issue. Also before calling things stupid suggest reading in context starting here 1865 where the reason is clearly explained?
so they (both) found a worshipper of our worshippers?
qala lahu moosa - said to him Moses?
He said "That you will not be able (to have) patience with me."
...
so he killed him...And as for the boy, so his parents were believing, so We feared that he oppresses them (with) tyranny and disbelief. So We intended that their Lord substitutes (for) them better than him and correction and closer (in) relation.
...that explanation what you were not able (to have) patience on it.
peace
No it isn't stupid but just to me maybe, may be i am stupid to you also , never mind .......
God Bless All.
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He slapped her hard in public and yes during normal days because he was spoiled and knew he could.
Wasn?t about the chair ? rather about the attitude, the smirk, the language used, and disrespect shown.
Would've done the same over a glass of water or a tooth pick. The item was not the issue.
Yeah -- soccer, boxing/martial arts, chess, ping pong, pool, golf, physics, supercomputing, history, and a bit math ? lol
Who mentioned anyone called by that name?
If you disagree with what is written in Qur'an then that is your issue. Also before calling things stupid suggest reading in context starting here 1865 where the reason is clearly explained?
so they (both) found a worshipper of our worshippers?
qala lahu moosa - said to him Moses?
He said "That you will not be able (to have) patience with me."
...
so he killed him...And as for the boy, so his parents were believing, so We feared that he oppresses them (with) tyranny and disbelief. So We intended that their Lord substitutes (for) them better than him and correction and closer (in) relation.
...that explanation what you were not able (to have) patience on it.
peace
The link is a good reading, although only partly translated using the dictionary.
http//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=9599213.0
the reason was good to change the guy,but with force which unfortunately kills the poor fellow and that wasn't the intention of Moses........
proof;
028.014
YUSUFALI When he reached full age, and was firmly established (in life), We bestowed on him wisdom and knowledge for thus do We reward those who do good.
028.015
YUSUFALI And he entered the city at a time when its people were not watching and he found there two men fighting,- one of his own religion, and the other, of his foes. Now the man of his own religion appealed to him against his foe, and Moses struck him with his fist and made an end of him. He said "This is a work of Evil (Satan) for he is an enemy that manifestly misleads!"
028.016
YUSUFALI He prayed "O my Lord! I have indeed wronged my soul! Do Thou then forgive me!" So (Allah) forgave him for He is the Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.See Moses Quivering before God for what had happened- wasn't his intention at all.
The Rod can lead to an unforseen end thus it is ill adviced.
God Bless.
peace
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A word that has made all the differance in 1881, i think;
BADDAL = TO CHANGE AND TO EXCHANGE, but here it is to change the guy.
some other ayah's which may clarify the word usage.
5661
from changing your Forms and creating you (again) in (forms) that ye know not.4823
(Such has been) the practice (approved) of Allah already in the past no change wilt thou find in the practice (approved) of Allah.3323
Among the Believers are men who have been true to their covenant with Allah of them some have completed their vow (to the extreme), and some (still) wait but they have never changed (their determination) in the leasthaven't you ever wanted to streighten out someones mischievous child whose parents are very good!? maybe not for fear of the consequances handshake
But peace
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Salaam
I feel as do my husband that alot ogf parents take it past spanking. I feel that if a child is being abusive to his classmates or teachers etc that he deserves to spanked(hit back) to show that it does not feel good and that it is not the right thing to do. My husband only spanks our children when they have hit someone first. We teach them to be defenders not attackers and that by hitting first that they were being attackers. Alot of parents take hitting beyond a parenting spanking and will punch, kick and throw and beat the child up I am totally against that but I do advocate spanking in a loving parenting matter in moderation only when child is doing some serious bad aggresive hurtful behaviour. -
Salaam
I feel as do my husband that alot ogf parents take it past spanking. I feel that if a child is being abusive to his classmates or teachers etc that he deserves to spanked(hit back) to show that it does not feel good and that it is not the right thing to do. My husband only spanks our children when they have hit someone first. We teach them to be defenders not attackers and that by hitting first that they were being attackers. Alot of parents take hitting beyond a parenting spanking and will punch, kick and throw and beat the child up I am totally against that but I do advocate spanking in a loving parenting matter in moderation only when child is doing some serious bad aggresive hurtful behaviour.Be very very careful with that. I don't know how that's related to stuff like BDSM but childhood experiences do get deep-rooted in the psyche--more than most ppl are conscious of... Why i related "spanking" to BDSM... well, you might want to know a bit about this "interpersonal relationship" they feel about being the punisher and the punished. Goes deep, doesn't it? And there's a lot more to it...
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Peace be upon you,
Is hitting kids in Islam condoned? >(
Hitting kids IMO is just plain cruel, a slap lasts a second, the physical pain lasts a minute, but the emotional pain lasts a lifetime. '(
peace
I got slapped a lot as a kid, no emotional pain here. In a matter of fact when I got slapped it put me in my place - as opposed to my two younger brothers ,whom my parents never use physical pain on, they're disrespectful and just plain mean kids, especially the youngest one. A slap would sit well every ones in a while.