i want to stop wearing the head-scarf/hijab, need support!
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Layla RevisThe Burqa Debate Layla Revis suggests it is ?Patriarchal ideology dressed up as social morality?
July 18, 2010
The Burqa Debate Uncovered
?Patriarchal ideology dressed up as social morality"Layla Revis
APPNA Journal
Association of Physicians of Pakistani Descent of North AmericaFor some from the South Asian tradition, the burqa is simply a colourful outfit ? flashes of verdant greens or bright blues - the silky petals of a fragile flower. Unfortunately, descriptions of colourful fabric can not conceal the need to examine the greater significance of a garment that serves to obfuscate a woman?s face and form, rendering her incapable of effectively communicating, and making it decidedly difficult for her connect with all members of society in the same way a man is permitted to connect.
The Bengali writer, Taslima Nasreen, a physician, a feminist, a human rights activist and a secular humanist notes in her Opinion Piece Let's Think Again About The Burqa The Quran does prescribe purdah. That doesn't mean women should obey it
?My mother used purdah. She wore a burqa with a net cover in front of the face. It reminded me of the meatsafes in my grandmother's house. One had a net door made of cloth, the other of metal. But the objective was the same keeping the meat safe. My mother was put under a burqa by her conservative family. They told her that wearing a burqa would mean obeying Allah. And if you obey Allah, He would be happy with you and not let you burn in hellfire. My mother was afraid of Allah and also of her own father. He would threaten her with grave consequences if she didn't wear the burqa. All dark inside? Don't you feel breathless? Don't you feel angry? Don't you ever feel like throwing it off? My mother kept mum. She couldn't do anything about it. But I did. When I was sixteen, I was presented a burqa by one of my relatives. I threw it away.?
Here, Nasreen was able to make the choice, but to talk about this choice and to write of this choice - that would require something else self-confidence and bravery. A fatwa would be issued on her head and she would not be alone.
For many women who have chosen to reveal their rejection of the burqa, they are met with death threats and intimidation. Most find lives in the West to avoid cutting their careers ? as well as their lives ? short. Among them, Iranian novelist Azar Nafisi (Reading Lolita in Tehran) and Marjane Satrapi (Persepolis), just two thought-provoking intellects all too often missing from the ?But-Women-Want-To-Wear-The-Burqa? debate.
In fact, many Pakistani men and women I?ve spoken with explained that they rarely saw anyone wearing the burqa in 1980?s Pakistan, outside of a few underdeveloped villages and television programs. These days, many cite the spread of Wahhabi Fundamentalism, thanks to Saudi-funded mosques and madrassas, for the resurgence of burqas on the streets of London and the markets of Lahore.
Worth also mentioning in this context are the famous Muslim feminist opponents of the burqa that include another Muslim Bengali writer, Rokeya Sakhawat Hussain, who criticized the burqa in her utopian novel, Sultana?s Dream, and Parvin Darabi, author of Rage Against The Veil.
This isn?t simply an issue of cultural relativism or the need to support a woman?s right to dress as she so chooses. For at one time in the Western world, it was also the cultural ?norm? for a woman to dwell solely in the home. In the United States less than a hundred years ago, it was also a cultural norm that only men were allowed to vote. Another cultural norm?
Wealthy white men owning slaves. Cultural ?norms? can no longer be used to pressure women to conform to subservient roles that place a price on their so-called ?virtue.? It is, as James Curran explains, ?Patriarchal ideology dressed up as social morality.?
Donning a burqa clearly serves to separate a woman from partaking in the same behavioural norms and equities as a man. A full account of the patriarchal history of this garment ? the biological meanings behind it ? also needs to be taken.
Much of this burqa debate reminds me of the early debates surrounding the suffrage movement. Surprisingly, there were plenty of women who did not support their own right to vote either. Other women tried to proclaim that working women ? and voting women ? simply couldn?t be good mothers.
Both men and women perpetuated cultural ?norms? and ideologies that focused on a woman?s purity and virtue as a way to restrict their power on the basis of biology. From the 18th to 20th centuries, women were told they were best suited to the home.
Some men and women even helped encourage the repression of female sexuality just as others might be seen as encouraging the repression of female sexuality with the acceptance of the burqa today. Termed a ?biologically determinist? approach to further maintain, as Curran calls it, a ?patriarchal offensive,? in Media and Power he writes, ?One key explanation for this continuing inequality was that suffragettes had been more successful on the political front than on the cultural one. While women become in 1918 equal citizens, many were still socialized through peer group pressure, schools, family tradition, and the mass media into acceptance of domestic and subordinate roles.?
And the women in Pakistan who revealed that they were not wearing the burqa by choice? where, I ask, is their voice? Might they, like Nasreen, ask, ?Why are women covered??
?Because they are sex objects,? Nasreen answers. ?Because when men see them, they are roused. Why should women have to be penalised for men?s sexual problems? Even women have sexual urges. But men are not covered for that. In no religion formulated by men are women considered to have a separate existence, or as human beings having desires and opinions separate from men?s. The purdah rules humiliate not only women but men too. If women walk about without purdah, it?s as if men will look at them with lustful eyes, or pounce on them, or rape them. Do they lose all their senses when they see any woman without burqa?... Irrespective of which book says it, which person advises, whoever commands, women should not have purdah? These are symbols of women?s oppression. Through them, women are told that they are but the property of men, objects for their use. These coverings are used to keep women passive and submissive. Women are told to wear them so that they cannot exist with their self-respect, honour, confidence, separate identity, own opinion and ideals intact. So that they cannot stand on their own two feet and live with their head held high and their spine strong and erect.?
Sure, some covered women might disagree. Many might praise the values of culture, but culture too - and the insistence upon gender-oriented fashion and behaviour ?is often the very thing that causes a society to remain impotent to change and progress.
Cultural ?norms? also have a very strong tendency of leaving little room for those who are homosexual or struggle against gender-biased, sexually stigmatised ?norms? imposed by a patriarchal order. The reality is that, in strict Islamic nations like Afghanistan, Iran, Saudi Arabia, and conservative communities from London to Lahore, women are told to wear the burqa and failure to do so can result in harassment, beatings, or death.
Interestingly enough, Edward Cody in The Washington Post quotes Andre Gerin when writing about the controversial burqa ban in France, delving a bit deeper into the physical and medical implications of such cultural norms. ? Gerin said, behind them are what he called ?gurus? who are trying to impose Islamic law? doctors at the Mother and Child Hospital in Lyon told him during a visit Thursday that they are threatened several times a week by angry Muslim men who refuse to allow their pregnant wives or daughters to be treated by male doctors, even for emergency births when nobody else is available. ?The scope of the problem is a lot broader than I thought,? he said at a news conference here summing up his findings? Gerin said representatives of several other European countries, as well as Canada, have expressed interest in his hearings, which included testimony from women?s advocacy figures, Muslim leaders and sociologists? History or biology teachers frequently are challenged by fundamentalist adolescents whose religious beliefs are contradicted by what they hear in school, he said, and in some communities half the girls in junior high physical education classes refuse to participate on religious grounds.?
So, the fact of the matter is that, for the small percentage of women who find spiritual meaning or safety behind the burqa, the issue can either go as deep - or as shallow - as the kohl-rimmed eyes peering from behind it. Thus, the more we support cultural constructs that ?biologically determine? that a woman?s sexuality must be repressed, the more we find ourselves as willing accomplices to patriarchal practices disguised as cultural or religious ?norms? - further perpetuating underdevelopment, gender inequality, and victimization? by way of ?virtue.?
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That woman really shows she doesn't know the Quran or that she does'nt care if she lies about the Qur'an.
so what? Doesn?t Bukhari et al show you the same ? yes
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group
Peace Be upon you sister! all i can do is give u my personal experience-the short version. i am from Latvia-yeah, next door neighbors!!!! i live in the usa now, and am 47 years old mom of 2 teens. I LOVE the hijab and abaya-you can't possibly have a "bad hair day"! also, wearing the long dress and the hijabs make me feel much prettier and more feminine-i am large, and typical american large ladies' clothing is, well, ugly...polyester....women wearing clothes that show their fat stomachs..u know the ones, i am sure...so, also, it gives me alot of opportunity for du'a-i get on the bus, all dressed, and get to tell at least 2-3 people about "my Islam" every time i ride the bus! what a great opportunity from Allah! I pray 5 times a day because i like to-it is my own private, quiet time with God, and then, too, I cover completely. So, there u are dear sister, take this for what it is-I love, love, love my abaya's and hijabs! and believe me, coming to Islam from the conservative catholic church of Latvia, many, many people completely abandoned me, email-yelled at me, wrote horrible things, etc. the most painful ones were that my poor, dear children are being led down the path of terrorism, control, and a whole bunch of other garbage that really hurt alot, and yet, i would not go out without my full dress for a ton of money-you know why? i can make a statement about what i believe, and what is important to me without saying a single word! I will not tell u to abandon hijab, nor will i tell u to keep wearing it-i will simply tell u to perhaps give it a chance-go to Al Hannah.com, or Middle Eastern Mall, and perhaps buy yourself some Al Amira style hijabs with sparkles on them! I love those! My friends call them my "disco-hijabs"! May God Bless and Guide u in whatever decision u make!
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aiysha to clarify....if wearing a hijab is no big deal to me although I don't believe God tells a woman to cover her hair, ears, neck AND husband is not supportive of removing my headscarf, i would just keep wearing it. Not really worth straining the marriage. change is not easy and takes time. Now, if I don't care to wear a headscarf but husband is not supportive that's when the resentment starts - like in my aunts situation. And also in my situation. I made it clear before getting married my views on hadiths which are not integral part of my belief system and where I stood on the headscarf sharing my experiences. Also, currently work in a community where there are white supremist sporting swastika tattoo. I was especially resentful as I already made myself clear before marriage but I think he thought he could change me. If I loved him, I will wear a headscarf! Now, I could not make husband happy at the expense of sacrificing my values/beliefs/comfort/happiness. the hijab as defined by men (headscarf) became a hijab as defined by God (barrier) in our marriage. He wanted me to meet with imam. (a prominent member of the mosque already said that people like me are followers of satan). what difference would it make to meet with imam. When he made it clear that if we have children (thank God we don't), he wanted his daughter to wear hijab starting at age 10 years and the children be raised as 'sunni' muslims and I am not to have any influence on the children teaching them otherwise and when he pulled the 'obey your husband per koran' card - well, sadly the marriage is over and in the process of divorce. divorce is by far one of the most painful of human experiences but what are my alternative? so, we have added to the divorce statistics in this country. i was reading an article on divorce amongst muslims in america, and religious incompatibility when it comes to hijab was one of the reasons. we had other reasons also which marriage counseling could help but marriage counseling is not going to change my belief and certainly not his either. i feel sad.
i am currently looking into the hadiths that specifically state that a woman should cover her hair, ears, neck. unlike what followers of hadiths say, i spent a lot of time reading about wudu - the hadiths are not clear. i haven't found clear instructions on how to pray either.
by the way, my husband who is arabic speaking (and I am not) said that khimar covers the head, arms, etc. if that were the case, then why would God tell a woman to cover her chest with a khimar. It is like saying cover your toes with your shoes. i did a phonetic search on khimar in the koran and didn't find any where else in the koran where khimar is used. is there another definition of khimar in arabic besides the scholar's?
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Salam & welcome, hanifa peace
it gives me alot of opportunity for du'a-i get on the bus, all dressed, and get to tell at least 2-3 people about "my Islam" every time i ride the bus!
i would not go out without my full dress for a ton of money-you know why? i can make a statement about what i believe, and what is important to me without saying a single word!
For me, faith is a private matter, I don't want to advertise it to everyone, be they Muslim or non-Muslim. I have been living in a country where people wear their religion like a badge and even complete strangers will ask you which faith you belong to. I hate this, and I feel it breeds hypocrisy.
I do wear a headscarf occasionally, for example after going to the gym and having a shower, since I don't like blow-drying my hair. Or when going to the desert, a windy beach, or a very conservative part of town. But I wear it tied in the back, I can't stand anything covering my neck. I'd never wear an amira hijab for that reason, and also because that particular style would just not be me, I would feel silly and odd.
i am currently looking into the hadiths that specifically state that a woman should cover her hair, ears, neck. unlike what followers of hadiths say, i spent a lot of time reading about wudu - the hadiths are not clear. i haven't found clear instructions on how to pray either.
The hadith most often used in order to claim that women must cover their ears, neck etc. is the one about Asma and the prophet supposedly pointing at her and saying this and that is what a woman needs to cover once she reaches puberty. That hadith is classified as weak even by traditional scholars. In fact, the Salafis use the weakness of this hadith as a proof that women are not allowed to show their faces.
Hadeeth about women uncovering their faces
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Dear Princess,
As you have seen that how was I bashed by feminists by just advising you to, take Quran as your Guide rather than these Ultra Moderen women who have nothing Islamic in their advice, they are very familiar to the most of social welfare ladies, dressed up in Thousands of worth cloths and wearing millions worth diamonds talking about the Misery and poverty of the Women in Pakistan, India and Bangaldesh at chilled airconditioned Halls of Five- stars hotels.
Actually you had already decided what to do, and to satisfy your inner you asked support of others, so the ladies who do the same thing can comfort you and can give releive of the fight going on between You and You.today the veil or Hijab has come to represent the ultimate symbol of backwardness and oppression, thanks to westren Media and some of our Moderen Muslim sisters, who think that there freedom starts from taking off the Hijaab.
This image for Muslim women around the world was laid in the by European colonialists, who became obsessed with freeing the 'Other' woman in order to subvert and destroy the indigenous cultures over which they ruled; and they tried to teach us that the only true model of emancipation was the western model of feminism.
Since Aysiha keeps on bringing the Ayat from Quran, and even though it is clealrly mentioned in the ayat the importance to observe Parda, again asks where is it in the Quran to observe Parda./Hijaab?And I come to realize what Allah means by saying, They won't listen, they won't hear..
And it is realy amazing from some one who knows nothing about Hadith, to give lecture on it, Offcourse it is hard to let any body change what he believes in, but it is a continuing process, once I was in the camp of those who think DEEN is a personal matter between them and Allah, and they are free to do whatever they want, what ever seems fit to them, Sorry that was most miserable time of my life I spent, I realize today, If I have to follow a deen I have to follow some principals, and some Laws, laid down in Quran, the other choice is Just to say bye bye to Allah, and that is easy, to hang in between is NO GOOD.
Before I post my final words let me show you what Quran says about this subject according to my understanding.. -
As you have seen that how was I bashed by feminists by just advising you to, take Quran as your Guide rather than these Ultra Moderen women who have nothing Islamic in their advice
It's a common misconception that feminism and Islam are mutually exclusive. Fact is, they are not, whatever you and other people who have a very distorted image of both chose to believe.
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hello & peace everyone!!
I DID IT!!!!! bravo yesterday was the first time i went out without the hair cover!! yay
maybe it was too soon or too suddenly, but somehow once a decision comes in my mind, i feel have to follow it to be true to myself.
bravo Well done! -
Peace everyone
I recommend these two articles
The hijab controversy
http//www.forpeoplewhothink.org/Topics/Hijab-Controversy.htmlMuslim women and tradition
http//forpeoplewhothink.org/Topics/Women_and_Tradition.html -
Well I have just found a stunner!
Ali
Ibn Abi Talib (may Allah be pleased with him) said,"1 came to the Prophet accompanied with Fatimah but We noticed him weeping vehemently. I said,
"I sacrifice you with my father and mother, Messenger of Allah. Why do you weep?" He said, "0 Ali, in the
night Journey (Isra) when I was taken up to the sky, I saw some women of my nation suffering some types
of torture. Therefore, I wept because of their sever tortures. I saw a woman who was hanging from her hair
and her brain was boiling. Another Woman was hanging from her tongue and a boiling fluid was being
poured into her mouth. Another woman whose legs were tied to her breasts and her hands to her forehead
and another who was hanging from her breasts. Another whose head was like a pig's and body like a
donkey and suffered million types of torture, and another woman who had the shape of a dog while the fire
pierced her month until it left her body from the anus and the angels were also Scourging her with lashes of
fire. Upon hearing that, Fatimah asked. O darling and the pleasure of my eyes, what were they doing to
Suffer such torture? Then the Prophet said; O daughter, as for the woman who was hanged from hair, she
would not cover her hair from men. The woman who was hanged from her tongue used to bring harm to
her husband; the one who was hanged from her breasts cumulated her husband's bed. The woman whose
legs were tied to her breasts and hands to forehead and suffering from serpents and scorpions would not
clean her body from major impurity or menstruation, and neglected prayer. The woman whose head was
like a pig's and had a donkey?s body was a talebearer and lair. As for the last one, she used to remind
recipients of her charity to them and was envious. O daughter, woe to her who disobeys her husband.?The English translator of the book says the follwing regarding the hadith quoted above "Not found"
Not found because its rubbish and clearly contradicts Quran and Muhammed.
o o
From a hadith forum and some guy wanting to find hadith to prove to cover the hair. Best bit is in all the replies they say the VERSE about covering the head/hair is enough and not one has mentioned that verse actually says to cover the breast!! o
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It's like Dante's Inferno Muslim style. I've heard it before, not sure where it comes from. Very popular amongst the "pious" women to use against other women, and/or the men to scare women into submission. What does cumulated the bed even mean? She gathered the bed together?
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It's like Dante's Inferno Muslim style. I've heard it before, not sure where it comes from. Very popular amongst the "pious" women to use against other women, and/or the men to scare women into submission. What does cumulated the bed even mean? She gathered the bed together?
I wondered what thet meant too ;D
Makes you see how these fabricated tales (baseless hadith) have come into Islamic 'tradition' though, just like was done before and to try to 'put women in their place' according to man. What baffles me is how the hell can anyone who reads Quran, I mean READS it and THINKS about if, FOR THEMSELVES, can possibly believe such obvious BS which totally contrdicts Quran. ???
Of course that leads to 'you dont understand the verses' or 'you dont understand Arabic' )
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It's like Dante's Inferno Muslim style.
Yup. ;D
I've heard it before, not sure where it comes from. Very popular amongst the "pious" women to use against other women, and/or the men to scare women into submission.
I feel deeply sorry for people who actually believe such BS.
There are many more like that out there
http//www.readislamicbooks.com/47-a-wifes-rebellion-against-her-husband.html
http//www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/2006
http//www.rasoulallah.net/v2/document.aspx?lang=en&doc=1389
