Mannerism - discussions

SarahY

Peace all,

What I have noticed (which I can fault myself on as well) is that when we get into discussions (heated ones) we can drift into our emotions and our attachments to our beliefs and sometimes instead of "RESPONDING" we "REACT".

So as a reminder, try previewing your posts. If you feel you are reacting and not responding edit the message before posting. We can't force people to see our own logic, we can't force people to believe what we believe but at least we can argue in the best ways. We have control of that. we can control our words and we can share our knowledge.

16125 (Asad) CALL THOU (all mankind] unto thy Sustainer's path with wisdom and goodly exhortation, and argue with them in the most kindly manner- for, behold, thy Sustainer knows best as to who strays from His path, and best knows He as to who are the right-guided.

peace.

Lena

) Thanks for the nice reminder to every one to invite to Islam and debate in the best possible manner.

Man_of_Faith

Peace Sarah,

I feel a bit guilty although I tried to shape up the past few days. So many unnecessary discussions leading nowhere. I have been meditating on this a couple of nights and I try to be wiser now, but I may still post too many posts which have no desirable effect. Should also try to be less provoked by obvious attempts to provoke.

We have also let so many threads go off-topic in favor of flaming each other or discuss disagreements on other topics.

Unfortunately, I have the temper of Moses, but I try to work on it.

I am sorry and apologize to all those who have been disturbed by the recent turmoil I caused on the forum together with others. Better to not respond to aggressive posts than counter it in the first place, even if you intend on relatively peaceful replies they may derail.

The quote you added is very helpful.

God bless you

SarahY

Peace

It's good to reflect and amend, it's all part of learning and being aware of ourselves and our actions.

I think it's perfectly fine to disagree, we don't all have to be in unison otherwise we'd prob just be as good as robots.

Sometimes some people are aggressive. I guess it's good to try to have empathy or some understanding for their reasoning/beliefs even if we don't agree. e.g. They may feel so strongly about their convictions in the same way you may feel about yours. So naturally if you are attacked/threatened it may upset/enrage you etc.

During my time on forums I've noticed not all people are listeners; some are just preachers, they just want to try and change you or just tell you things. Some refuse to listen or are not capable of listening yet.

I'm glad the quote was helpful God's given us the best guide so inshallah we can all act by it.

peace

unknownuser

Salam moderator @SarahY.

Thank you for this reminder to us.Yeah, because this is online forum all people with "different background" can enter freely, even 13 years old boy and troublemakers can registered .The user named @pixelrow (who had already banned) is the example.

For you all free-minders, I have some tips about troublemaker/intruder user, because I already experienced in another online forums, so I'm not shocked to met someone like @pixelrow.This is the tips

Characteristics of troublemaker users

Mostly they're still a teenager, unemployment colleger, or some adult with unstable personality.
Their debate is based on emotional thinking, stubborn and lack of intellegence.So debate with them will NO ENDING.
Of course their post are aggresive and insulting others.
They often online for hours.
Mostly they're not well studied, and most of their knowledge is from internet.

How to face them

If their post insulting you, then slow down your emotion and do not let them play your emotion.If you angry and replied their post, it means you already provoked by them and your post may contain aggresive word as their post.
If you're in emotional state during debate with them.Then the debate will only waste the pages, not straight to the point, and most of the post contain ad hominem and bad words.Of course in Islam isn't allowed and only make you a sinner.
Use evidences from the books, literatures n your knowledges and don't use internet as your primary sources.
The safest way against them is ignore their posts.

Well it's my opinion, it's not perfect and may contain some mistakes.Hopefully it will help you all.