How do Quran Aloners interact with their families
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I'm lucky in the sense that my parents are not religious so my beliefs aren't a problem for them.
Peace . I am somehow like you. My parents are devout Sunnis but they don't impose their beliefs on me anymore as I am an grown up adult, so they cannot see any reason for doing so anymore.
However, not all are as "lucky" as we are.
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Salaam.
I am still 17 so I just jave to completely obey my parents.
My parents are going to force to me to wear the hijab this Ramadan.
My parents will surely force me to perform tarawikh prayer in this Ramadhan so I just have to perform the ritual, pretend to set up Muhammad and Abraham as partners with God in prayer, have to yell the Egyptian God Amen (Aaaameeeeen) after recitation of Sura Al Fatihah.
I have already told my mom about this hadith thingy but my mom did not pay attention to me. '( I think if I straighly tell my parents that I am strongly against hadith, maybe they would torture me elektro
But when it comes to hijab, I still remember when I was quarelling with my mom about hijab. After giving proof from Qur'an and the mursal hadith about Aisha tellimg Asma to cover everything except face and hands, she told me like this There are many other ahadith about that. Who are you to question ulema (priests actually pffft)! They have learnt about Islam for so many years. Don't you know that women will be strung up by hair for not covering their hair? Don't you know that the majority of hell dwellers are women? Don't you know that it is your father who is also responsible for your sins. I have never seen a person like you
My parents are not hardcore hadithers. Even my mother wears colored hijab. But when it comes to either hijab iis compulsory or not, they'd become extreme.
We really seldom pray together. So this give me the chance to establish salat without the rituals.
And this upcoming Ramadan, my mom would ask my whether I am "clean" or "unclean". I have to be honest! And if she knows that I am "unclean", she'd cook for me in the day of ramadan and force me to eat or she'd yell at me '(
And I have to listen to Bukhari & Co's Masterpiece of lies after tarawikh prayer at mosque.
I hope y'all are having great lives even with hardcore hadithers or anti-Muslim like Ali Sina voodoo
May Peace be with You All.
Thank you for sharing your story sister. Your story is unfurtunately very common. My small cousins are underaged but they are still forced to fast and wear hijab. They also force them to pray 'tarawih' with them in the local mosque although the tarawih prayer lasts for 1 am here. This has lead one of them, who is 15 years old, to become a closet atheist, as she is disgusted by all the inconvenient rules by religion. But from the point of view of the parents they are simply just raising their kid what is right, and teaching them how to become god fearing, but in some cases they are in fact just leading their kids away from their religion.
When you become 18 years old or above, you would hopefully be able to practice islam according to your own understanding.
May God guide us all to the true path.
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I participate in Christmas parade, decorate for Christmas, give presents, at times have attended church. Actually, I like listening to sermons. None of which conflict with my beliefs. Obviously, doesn't carry the same meaning to me as it does to my Christian friends. When my friends ask me, I just state that Jesus is not son of God. Depending on the situation and person, get into discussion about the bible. I have ended conversations by saying with a smile, "if I want my soul saved, I go directly to the Father and cut out the middle guy ". I don't get into and avoid getting into arguments and confrontation.
And the same thing with my family and friends who are traditional Muslims. The last time went to the mosque, I didnt pray. People just think that i am on my periods. There was a time when I was on my menses when we went to friends house and I didn't want everyone to know that I was on my menses and so I prayed with them - going through the motions. Praying the way that traditional Muslims is not a sin or contradictory to the Koran. Depending on situation, I don't join and will explain myself.
I just visited family and let them know of my beliefs. When asked how my fasting is going or why I don't fast, I just explain. I don't wear a hijab and last year when attending my cousins wedding when everyone was in burqa or niqab or in hijab, I decided to stand up by not wearing a hijab and having my hair down. It was scandalous! I said to my uncle that none of the prophets went with the flow following the traditions of their forefathers. They stood up and we all know how they were treated by society. I stand up when the occupation calls for it or feel like it but there are times when I don't bother. I just listen and say nothing. Go with the flow and the motions without meaning. I find that at times and depending on the sitaution, this is the best. God knows me and what I believe and at the end of the day, that is what matters and not what other people think may it be positive or negative.
I have had people say that I belong to a cult and to which my response was, yes I do and it is called the cult of believing in God, the last day and doing good things . Over the years, I have matured meaning I don't get all emotional and react emotionally like i used to when people say that I follow satan, lost, going to hell, etc.
Knowledge is empowering. Depending on the situation and person, I refer to the Koran asking can you tell me where in the Koran God says..such and such. Or ask for references from the hadiths.
So it all depends on the situation and persons,how I interact.
thanks for sharing your story, you made a lot of good points. I also participate to a certain extent in christmas. It is very mature of you not to let your belief effected by peoples opinion as the quran says
And if you obey most of those on the earth they will lead you away from the path of God; that is because they follow conjecture, and that is because they only guess. (6,116)
By the way if you ask for hadith references then you should know that there is literally a hadith for justifying almost anything, as there are hundred of thousands of hadith all made up by different people who wanted to justify each and everything.
Peace
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Greetings and peace, all group
My wife is a nontrinitarian Christian (monotheist); we get along fine. My brother is the same as my wife. My parents respect my right to believe as I do, and I respect their right to believe as they do. I avoid discussing religion/Deen with other family to avoid contention--a family gathering is no place for dispute. I see Christmas, Easter, et cetera as cultural events. The 4th of July falls during a fast by my understanding, but ALLAH knows what is best for us, and any Guidance we follow improves us, ISA.
My wife respects my dietary wishes and I respect the right of anybody else to eat what they will. My understanding is that abstaining from the meat of swine is a rite that is binding for those who turn to ALLAH through the Qur'an for Guidance; others have their own rites. My wife supports me when I fast, and I support her when she fasts (for Lent).
2256 There is no compulsion in the system; the proper way has been clarified from the wrong way. Whoever rejects evil, and believes in GOD, indeed he has taken grasp of the strongest hold that will never break. GOD is Hearer, Knower.
2856 You cannot guide whom you love. But it is GOD who guides whom He wills; and He is fully aware of those who receive the guidance.
2267 For every nation We have established rites which they are to fulfill. So do not let the matter fall into dispute. And call upon your Lord, for you are on a guidance which is straight.
I don't care what "religion" my children follow so long as they choose monotheism--I can be happy with that. I'll guide them as much as I'm allowed and be an example as much as allowed--but the matter is ultimately NOT in my hands.
ALLAH knows best.
peace
~Abdul-Hadi
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My family is rather broken, but over the last year I was able to convince my mother about this approach to islam, and she has come to peace with it. My brother is atheist, most assuredly because the nonsense of ahadith, mullahs, etc. pushed him away.
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Peace Abdul-Hadi,
But then your wife is not a "Christian" but muslim? confused
I thought the only reason they call it Christianity is because they believe Christ to be God and His religion. But I understand what you say, I also called myself Christian and disbelieved in the trinity before I discovered Quran. Maybe in time she will understand.
She rejects Quran as a scripture from God I suppose?
God bless you
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Greetings and peace, all group
Peace Abdul-Hadi,
But then your wife is not a "Christian" but muslim? confused
I thought the only reason they call it Christianity is because they believe Christ to be God and His religion. But I understand what you say, I also called myself Christian and disbelieved in the trinity before I discovered Quran. Maybe in time she will understand.
She rejects Quran as a scripture from God I suppose?
God bless you
Quite so! She is a muslim but not a Muslim!
Not intending to preach to you, but for the benefit of other readers...
I'd call her a Christian because that is what she identifies with and because she follows the example/teachings of Jesus (peace upon all Prophets). Oh, I've told her that I believe that she is a muslim and she understands my logic. The label of any religion is not what determines whether someone is Guided/misguided or even whether they are monotheistic or not. I don't believe that Jesus or any other Prophet started any religion; religion was attributed to them. Likewise, I don't believe Islam was intended to be a religion; my understanding is that Deen means system/way of life.
I was a muslim as a practitioner of monotheistic Vedanta before reading the Qur'an.
The Guidance of all Prophets (peace upon them all) is the same. If she follows the Guidance of ALLAH through Jesus (or any other Prophet), no problem!
Since she has never read the Qur'an, she can hardly reject it--perhaps she is ignorant of it and not ignorant of ALLAH. I don't care if she never reads it. ALLAH is the goal, through monotheism, regardless of the method. It is sufficient to me that she is a monotheist and a good example to our children ISA.
May ALLAH see fit to Guide all seekers.
peace
~Abdul-Hadi
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Greetings and peace, all group
Quite so! She is a muslim but not a Muslim!
Not intending to preach to you, but for the benefit of other readers...
I'd call her a Christian because that is what she identifies with and because she follows the example/teachings of Jesus (peace upon all Prophets). Oh, I've told her that I believe that she is a muslim and she understands my logic. The label of any religion is not what determines whether someone is Guided/misguided or even whether they are monotheistic or not. I don't believe that Jesus or any other Prophet started any religion; religion was attributed to them. Likewise, I don't believe Islam was intended to be a religion; my understanding is that Deen means system/way of life.
I was a muslim as a practitioner of monotheistic Vedanta before reading the Qur'an.
The Guidance of all Prophets (peace upon them all) is the same. If she follows the Guidance of ALLAH through Jesus (or any other Prophet), no problem!
Since she has never read the Qur'an, she can hardly reject it--perhaps she is ignorant of it and not ignorant of ALLAH. I don't care if she never reads it. ALLAH is the goal, through monotheism, regardless of the method. It is sufficient to me that she is a monotheist and a good example to our children ISA.
May ALLAH see fit to Guide all seekers.
peace
~Abdul-Hadi
Peace be with you always. I love your understanding of the path, and I believe you have truly grasped something that is quite difficult for many, many people. God bless you and your family, always. You have abandoned labels and sought true meaning.
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Greetings and peace, all group
Peace be with you always. I love your understanding of the path, and I believe you have truly grasped something that is quite difficult for many, many people. God bless you and your family, always. You have abandoned labels and sought true meaning.
sun handshake
Thank you for your very kind words!
May the Lord bless you and keep you.
May the Lord make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious to you.
May the Lord lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace.peace
~Abdul-Hadi
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Peace brother Abdul-Hadi,
I have the same understanding as you and you may see if you read some of my earlier in other threads. In the case that I use islam as religion then I do not mean to refer to it as a specific religion but the only religion that exists and I do not see islam as a name (hence I avoid a capital letter on islam), but a system as you say. The use of religion is because it is the English alternative when you refer to things like this. Also the word itself and its origin does mean something in which you put your Faith, ie you rely on. Arabic 'deen' is perhaps more specific than the English choice, but religion still connotes that it is something you put your Faith in and if you say God's religion then it means you rely on God. Your religion can be anything and even science. So there is nothing wrong with the word religion but just how people perceive it. So this is also why God says there is only one deen (religion) and it is His deen, calling yourself specifically by label; Muslim, Christian or Jew etc, it does not mean anything to God other than he thinks you divide your religion into different parts.
Does your wife refuse to open and read the Quran?
Does not your differentiating approach to islam appeal to her since you seem not to practice traditional islam?
When I first opened the Quran in the end of 2009 I could relatively quickly see that it confirmed the Bible I had studied before. It did not add any particular different things than what my Gospels of Jesus taught me. The only nonsense I found was from what the traditional muslims taught and from which I distanced myself almost instantly.
The Gospels do not have many direct narratives of God but rather when Jesus is speaking. Of course it could seem God is more blunt than Jesus, but Jesus also spoke pretty frankly to those who were weak in Faith.
Anyway, I hope your wife would eventually open her eyes and give the Quran a try. I will pray for your cause.
God bless you
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Greetings and peace, all group
Quite so! She is a muslim but not a Muslim!
Not intending to preach to you, but for the benefit of other readers...
I'd call her a Christian because that is what she identifies with and because she follows the example/teachings of Jesus (peace upon all Prophets). Oh, I've told her that I believe that she is a muslim and she understands my logic. The label of any religion is not what determines whether someone is Guided/misguided or even whether they are monotheistic or not. I don't believe that Jesus or any other Prophet started any religion; religion was attributed to them. Likewise, I don't believe Islam was intended to be a religion; my understanding is that Deen means system/way of life.
I was a muslim as a practitioner of monotheistic Vedanta before reading the Qur'an.
The Guidance of all Prophets (peace upon them all) is the same. If she follows the Guidance of ALLAH through Jesus (or any other Prophet), no problem!
Since she has never read the Qur'an, she can hardly reject it--perhaps she is ignorant of it and not ignorant of ALLAH. I don't care if she never reads it. ALLAH is the goal, through monotheism, regardless of the method. It is sufficient to me that she is a monotheist and a good example to our children ISA.
May ALLAH see fit to Guide all seekers.
peace
~Abdul-Hadi
Peace Abdul-Hadi,
I completely agree - labels mean nothing. The Quran repeats this message. And Guidance, (even from reading the Quran) is not knowing not to follow hadith either, it's more than that.
To summarise One Creator, One Message.
About some comments here about people being pushed towards being atheists... I think the same thing can happen for those in new age spirituality and Pagan belief. They are drawn to Paganism and modern forms of spirituality because 'traditionalism' is constrictive possibly. However, sometimes I feel that the Pagans would be looked at differently than atheists because of what we perceive the Quran says about some of the Pagans at the time. but some among the group would have been among the open minded and the Queen of Sheba is an example and secret believers in the time of Pharaoh/story of Moses. I also believe there is complexity with the term 'kafir'. And I know I repeat this - but some modern Pagans really aren't like some 'Pagans' described in the Quran who just mock and say to the Messengers that we won't be raised/resurrected and then bring on the punishment and so on.
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Peace,
In fact I am not sure if I ever referred to myself as 'Christian' when I was one. I usually only said that "I believe in God" or something similar to that. Perchance I felt that it was silly to call a religion Christianity when I did not believe that Jesus was God's son. The reason I opened the book of Quran so late was because I thought it was an invented book due to its followers running around with AK-47's and yelling "Allahu Akhbar" which I felt had nothing to do with God's religion. It was a coincident that I encountered the Quran in 2009 when I met my wife. I could see that my prejudices had prevented me from discovering the Truth earlier and that Muhammad seemed to have been a modest gentleman and not a grumpy bearded man.
People down here constantly ask me about my Faith and when I reply that I am a muslim they always ask "shia or sunni?" and I frown and repeat "I am a muslim". Sometimes they do not buy my answer and say something like "come on, you need to be either shia or sunni". This habit of referring ourselves as belonging to specific groups runs deep in man.
God bless you