Im have destroyed my own life
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Thank you for your answer. Means a lot. You're right. It may destroy much if I tell it. But I feel in a way it becomes a kind of double life if I do not tell the non-Muslim my friends that I am a Muslim. I will not risk meeting both on the street at once. I almost have to leave some of my friends, no matter how painful it is. I am so tired of this. To walk around being afraid of meeting people on the street. I have to choose sides. Either be friends with my non-Muslim friends or my Muslim friends. It probably sounds fine out to be friends with both, but I do not think it works.
I have really ruin everything.
Peace be With you too! )
If you can't be friends with your non-muslim friends as a muslim and with your muslim friends as someone having doubts, I think both are not real friends (and the muslims are not real muslims).
You could carefully try out how much you can tell them, and either they accept it, or you start looking for real friends (which is not that easy) and in the meantime keep relations with them but with an inner distance which allows you to go your own way.
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Salam!
There is something called You do not know what you have until you lose it. I had everything.I had several Muslim friends . I went wore hijab and abaya sometimes. I went to the mosque almost every day after school. I got to know the people in the mosque. I had a peace inside me .
But after a while I found myself astray. I was an unbeliever . One who believe , then disbelief, then believ so on.. . Or rather one hypocrites . I've done a lot of stupid as unbeliver . I have also taken an overdose of pills twice to die and ended up in hospital both times . I hated that life. And now I hate myself and everything I 've done. I am so mad at myself.
The Muslim friends my contacts me yet, they wonder what happened . Why I never answer and meet then anmore . I miss my muslim friends. But now I dare not meet them . Why ? Because I 'm afraid they will leave me if they know the truth . I miss the Muslim my life . I miss it so terribly much. I miss praying five times a day. Getting closer to God . But it can never be like before . For that case then I tell the truth , and then no one will be with me. Not the muslim friends , nor the non- Muslim friends of mine. But I will not live a lie anymore. I am considering telling all, for both sides . Telling the Muslim side that I have been unbeliver and tell my other friends that I am a Muslim. And now that I'm going to become a better Muslim. If I lose all I have at least been honest .
And you may well judge me here. But I do not care. The only thing I care about now is to get closer to God , go to the mosque and pray again . Pray for forgiveness. Ask to not let the devil catch me. Whether I have some friends again or not.
But im afraid. Its scary to tell the truth. But should I?
294 Say, "If the home of the Hereafter with Allah is for you alone and not the people, then wish for death, if you should be truthful.
328 Let not believers take disbelievers as allies rather than believers. And whoever does that has nothing with Allah , except when taking precaution against them in prudence. And Allah warns you of Himself, and to Allah is the destination
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Salaam Maryah,
If you think you are a great sinner or kafir , you should take a look at the following aayat.
676
676 So when the night covered him, he saw a star. He said, "This is my lord." But when it set, he said, "I like not those that disappear."This is Ibrahim, look what he has done. He said to the star that "this is my Lord", and then goes on and said to the moon that "this is my Lord" and again to the sun . The only reason was he was in search of his Lord . So, it is very big to say so, but it is not considered as a sin.
Secondly, Please read carefully from 2563-71 and see what are the sins Allah forgives. So nothing to worry about what you have done, inshaAllah.
Finally, you don't need to hide from your friends. Just be with them and behave normal. When Allah what THEM to hear something good from Allah, then they themselves ask you questions .
Then, you must tell them the truth only about what they ask you. Then let them decide to be your friend or not. Nothing is upon you and nothing to worry, if they are not true muslims, they will take a side from you. And you don't have to do anything, believe me, just be normal with them.If you have any difficulty in understand what I wrote, please feel free to ask for clarification here or PM me.
May Allah increase our knowledge and guide us on His path pr
mmKhan -
Salaam Maryah,
If you think you are a great sinner or kafir , you should take a look at the following aayat.
676
676 So when the night covered him, he saw a star. He said, "This is my lord." But when it set, he said, "I like not those that disappear."This is Ibrahim, look what he has done. He said to the star that "this is my Lord", and then goes on and said to the moon that "this is my Lord" and again to the sun . The only reason was he was in search of his Lord . So, it is very big to say so, but it is not considered as a sin.
Secondly, Please read carefully from 2563-71 and see what are the sins Allah forgives. So nothing to worry about what you have done, inshaAllah.
Finally, you don't need to hide from your friends. Just be with them and behave normal. When Allah what THEM to hear something good from Allah, then they themselves ask you questions .
Then, you must tell them the truth only about what they ask you. Then let them decide to be your friend or not. Nothing is upon you and nothing to worry, if they are not true muslims, they will take a side from you. And you don't have to do anything, believe me, just be normal with them.If you have any difficulty in understand what I wrote, please feel free to ask for clarification here or PM me.
May Allah increase our knowledge and guide us on His path pr
mmKhanSalam!
Thank you for the answer. It helped me alot. But I dont think unbelief is a sin. There is no place in the Quran that it is a sin... whas the sura's you showed me (Ibrahim) shirk or unbelief?But i found one surah "4.106. Pray God for forgiveness. Assuredly God is All-Forgiving, All-Compassionate." In that surah the word sin is not mentioned, but it says you are forgiven for everything if you regret.
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Don't look at your past, the past is already dead. The most important thing at this point is what you're going to do NOW and in future time. Focus on re-tuning your life and being dedicated to God.
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Salam!
Thank you for the answer. It helped me alot. But I dont think unbelief is a sin. There is no place in the Quran that it is a sin... whas the sura's you showed me (Ibrahim) shirk or unbelief?But i found one surah "4.106. Pray God for forgiveness. Assuredly God is All-Forgiving, All-Compassionate." In that surah the word sin is not mentioned, but it says you are forgiven for everything if you regret.
Salaam Maryah,
You are very welcome handshake Glad to know my post helped you, AlhamduliAllah hail
Red At this point you must realize that your Lord helped you find yourself what you were needed. Be thankful to Him.
He made you find just because He has not left you nor forgotten. What else do you need? This is because of your sincerity and honesty with AllahIbrahim never ever did shirk in his entire life time 2135].
May Allah increase our knowledge and guide us on His path pr
mmKhan -
Salaam Maryah,
You are very welcome handshake Glad to know my post helped you, AlhamduliAllah hail
Red At this point you must realize that your Lord helped you find yourself what you were needed. Be thankful to Him.
He made you find just because He has not left you nor forgotten. What else do you need? This is because of your sincerity and honesty with Allah DIbrahim never ever did shirk in his entire life time 2135].
May Allah increase our knowledge and guide us on His path pr
mmKhanYou are so nice, thanks that you care sun
Yes, that true. Allah helped me. Im thankfull
God bless you -
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peace Maryah
I think that you should not confess your sins to anybody but God. you are in the right direction if you repent for what you have done.
Regarding your old muslims friends, if they talk to you good, and if they do not talk to you forgive them for being judgmental, for God will measure them with the stick they measure you, and there are always more muslims to be friends with.
and if they ask you what happened, just tell them that Satan led you astray but the most merciful brought you back to the rigth path.Matthew 72 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.
And regarding the non muslim friends; you should tell them that you are muslim and that you are proud of it, and as a good muslim you can not be their friend anymore.
328
LET NOT the believers take those who deny the truth for their allies in preference to the
believers19 - since he who does this cuts himself off from God in everything - unless it be to
protect yourselves against them in this way.20 But God warns you to beware of Him for with
God is all journeys' end.
329
Say "Whether you conceal what is in your hearts21 or bring it into the open, God knows it for
He knows all that is in the heavens and all that is on earth; and God has the power to will
anything."commentary from muhamad's asad translation "the mesage of quran".
19 I.e., in cases where the interests of those "deniers of the truth" clash with the interests
of believers (Manar 111, 27. Regarding the deeper implications of the term "allies" (awliya',
see 4139 and the corresponding note.
20 Lit., "unless you fear from them something that is to be feared". Zamakhshari explains this
phrase as meaning, "unless you have reason to fear that they might do something which ought
to be guarded against" - obviously referring to situations in which "those who deny the truth"
are more powerful than the Muslims, and are therefore in a position to damage the latter
unless they become their "allies" in a political or moral sense.5822You will not find a people who believe in Allah and the Last Day having affection for those who oppose Allah and His Messenger, even if they were their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their kindred. Those - He has decreed within their hearts faith and supported them with spirit from Him. And We will admit them to gardens beneath which rivers flow, wherein they abide eternally. Allah is pleased with them, and they are pleased with Him - those are the party of Allah . Unquestionably, the party of Allah - they are the successful.
may God increase our knowledge and give us some wisdom.
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Salaam.
And regarding the non muslim friends; you should tell them that you are muslim and that you are proud of it, and as a good muslim you can not be their friend anymore.
Please do not do this.
People have been quoting verses like and to justify that Muslims are not allowed to have non-Muslim friends, and that we should cut off all relations with them.
In what kind of situation would you refer to someone as an "ally"? If you read surah 60, you will see that the context is war/hostility/persecution.
In the name of God, the Almighty, the Merciful.
O you who believe, do not take My enemy and your enemy as allies. You extend love to them, even though they have rejected the truth that has come to you. They drive you and the messenger out, simply because you believe in God, your Lord. If you are mobilizing to strive in My cause, seeking My blessings, then how can you secretly love them? I am fully aware of everything you conceal and what you declare. And whoever of you does this, then he has gone astray from the right path.
...
Perhaps God will grant compassion between you and those you consider enemies; and God is Capable. And God is Forgiving, Merciful.
God does not prohibit you from those who have not fought you because of your system, nor drove you out of your homes, that you deal kindly and equitably with them. For God loves the equitable.
But God does prohibit you regarding those who fought you because of your system, and drove you out of your homes, and helped to drive you out. You shall not ally with them. Those who ally with them, then such are the transgressors.
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peace
think about this old sayings
HE who walks with wolves to howl he learns.
Tell me with whom you walk and I will tell you who you are.
Proverbs 1320 He that walks with wise men shall be wise but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.
Psalm 264 I have not sat with vain persons, neither will I go in with dissemblers.
Psalm 11 How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, Nor stand in the path of sinners, Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!
Psalm 59 Not a word from their mouth can be trusted; their heart is filled with malice. Their throat is an open grave; with their tongues they tell lies.
Psalm 264I do not sit with the deceitful, nor do I associate with hypocrites.
Psalm 265I abhor the assembly of evildoers and refuse to sit with the wicked.
Proverbs 115 my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths;
Proverbs 414Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evildoers.
Proverbs 241 Do not envy the wicked, do not desire their company;
Jeremiah 1517I never sat in the company of revelers, never made merry with them; I sat alone because your hand was on me and you had filled me with indignation.Proverbs 122"How long will you who are simple love your simple ways? How long will mockers delight in mockery and fools hate knowledge?.
I hope not to be doing thisMatthew (word of Jesus?)76 ?Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.
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peace
Qur'an2525-29 2525And on the Day on which the skies, together with the clouds, shall burst asunder, and the angels are made to descend in a mighty descent - (2526) on that Day true sovereignty belongs to the Most Gracious hence, a Day of distress will it be for all who deny the truth, (2527) and a Day on which the evildoer will bite his hands (in despair], exclaiming "Oh, would that I had followed the path shown to me by the apostle!21 (252 Oh, woe is me! Would that I had not taken so-and-so for a friend! (2529) Indeed, he led me astray from the remembrance (of God] after it had come unto me!" For (thus it is] Satan is ever a betrayer of man.22
may God increase my muslim brothers in knowledge, and give us some wisdom, and may he destroy the corrupters.
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Peace Marya and all,
Granted that life and all sorts of things we have to face are not easy... I would suggest that you (and me and everyone) change perspective a bit... from the external (our friends, our religion, our past) and shift it to the internal (our current understanding, our current feelings and what's in our heart). I believe it is essential, critical and paramount to understand and realize that all that really matters to us is our INNER world, our feelings, our emotions, our mind, our thoughts, our beliefs etc. Our inner world does without a doubt determine how we experience life. That said, I would suggest you go into yourself and try to find peace in that which you believe in. That is, stick to yourself and don't worry about conforming to others. Be yourself! Either you be yourself, or you deny yourself and live a lie. Don't deny yourself! And don't think you must fit into a pre-shaped box. No! It's not about either choosing your muslim friends, OR your non-muslim friends. This is just another way of denying yourself. Either way you choose, you deny yourself... you just haven't decided which way yet. Your thinking is all on your external world, your friends. You need to look inside and feel what is right for you. It might not be any of these two choices. Life is not black and white.
Also, don't expect or worry about any worst case scenarios where you imagine that your friends will leave you. Whatever will happen will happen, so don't image bad outcomes in your mind. If at all, try imagine good ones instead.
The past doesn't exist except in your mind. There is no need to play old tapes in your mind of past events just to torment yourself, just as it is useless to worry about the future, which is also just negative predictions/fantasies of the mind. Like other people have said, as much as you can... live NOW.
Don't deny yourself. If you live for your friends, to make them happy and accept you, you deny, ignore and reject yourself. Instead, love yourself... and love will come from the outside in the shape of friends as well. Don't judge yourself, and don't judge your friends... just BE... be yourself... and continue to grow, explore, mature, develop and live life. Enjoy life and enjoy the love which the Creator has created the world with. It's just a matter of perception. Most of us are blind most of the time. It's indeed a struggle to purify oneself, a lifelong one... but it is absolutely worth it!
Warm regards and best wishes