I am getting depressed, Please help me
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peace,
"there is no progress without struggle"
In addition to the good advice already been given, not much to add except
Some exerpts from Quran - page
And confusion is no bad thing, it forces us to re-think/question and serves to remind us what the core is. And of course, without confusion how would one recognise clarity? )
http//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=14902.msg139026#msg139026 -
Salam
I can remember what it was like when I had to find that much of what I had firmly believed was not correct. it is clear that you feel like you're in a hole. thirty years to believe in something and to be convinced of it, and after being forced to realize that it is not so as was thought, is not easy. but be sure that God will help you. In fact he has already do so HE helped you that you has woken up and has led you to found the way to the Quran alone ).God is there and is always the same. People have always asked him for help and fasted -all a bit different.
It's not so much the form what it counts, but the content. Prayer is primarily for you alone. God does not need it. It gives you strength, peace, relaxation, help and more. ) If you have not discovered how many times yet, then just go on and start - God will help you!
I have already said elsewhere my opinion that many paths lead to God, because we are all different. But you are certainly on the right track, don't let different opinions confuse you. read the Quran itself and trying to understand it - God is the teacher of the Quran, and he gives wisdom to whom he will , try to ask HIM - and He will answer you. )
and don't be sad!
peace -
Salaam, member of islam.
Be kind to yourself, we people are not God, we are never going to be perfect. The most honourable thing that can ever be said of any uf us is that we did not give up, that we tried, and tried. But as the Qur'an itself says, we also need and get respite. You may be are overwhelmed, may be even by feelings of guilt one way or other. Let go of any feeling of guilt, let go of any need to hurry, let go of any thought that you are faulty and should have done this or been that. You are the est thing that you can be. Breath deep and take things with a lot of calm. I do not believe that hadith are any authority, but the same as with proverbs and popular wisdom there are some gems about them. There is on I particularly like attributed to Ali, but never mind where it comes from, if it does good It says slowness is from God, haste is from Satan. Godd things are done slowly and calmly, abeatuful landscape is contemplated calmly, divine light is too intense it is to be taken slowly.
Be easy on yourself and don't feel hurried in anything. As some brothers an sisters have told you, rituals are good, but they can wait their time and they are there to help, to make things easier not to make you feel guilty. If they do you more harm than good, leave till that changes if it does.
Rituals are like habits. We do need habits because they structure our life and are fit for a purpose, but if a habit becomes a burden instead of a help we must study why it is so and do whatever we find ois suitable.
At any rate, congratulations, and be glad. Every day is the beginning of the rest of your life and that is a really really pricelss gift.
Salaam
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Salaam member of Islam,
Welcome to the forum and I hope we can help you find your way if the good Lord's willing.
Even if you are in confusion over how to pray I recommend that you have some sort of communication with the Most Gracious, He will help you if you seek His nearness and guidance as well as protection from the evil one and hos followers. Submit to His will.
Apart from this, my brothers and sisters on this forum said some wise words.
I hope, God willing, that you will find your way which will look good in God's eyes.
God bless you
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I thank you all for your reactions. I will react to everyone this evening. I have school now.
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Exactly. Hold on to that feeling. There's no need to be depressed...it's actually a very exciting thing tbh, there's so much to learn for yourself. The important thing in such voyages tends to be hold on to the basics. The basics you know to be right, the rest are mere details
If anything confuses you, be a good person, the way you know how, until you can work it out. Believe in yourself and your God given abilities to understand and make sense of all this and remember patience, it's a long journey and no one said it would be easy.
Peace
I try to be. It is new to me and i hope Allah SWT will guide me to the right path.
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Aww. hugs
For myself personally, I have 2 daily prayers as I view Salat-ul-Wusta as a metaphorical statement about the balanced and moderate path, and that is why it is stated that its important. I would say right now, you don't need to think about that. You don't need to follow Rasha Khalifa's way, at least if you don't wish to. Just perform salat as much as you like. Maybe this confusion can occur because traditional Islam teaches people to be overly concerned with how many salat and so forth. Allah (swt) states that salat itself is important, in the Quran, as far as I recall there's nothing saying that what Allah (swt) is most concerned with you doing it 2,3,5,6 times. I believe Allah (swt) just wants us to communicate with Him regularly as this only benefits us. Nothing we do can help or harm our Lord. Salat seems to be a way to ensure you set aside some time to really connect.
Gradually with Allah's help and time you'll overcome that.
I believe hell is just a way of saying people should not want to do evil, not only is it wrong but there is a consequence and you can't just say oh well, maybe not believing in a Creator once the evidence comes to us isn't that bad. i.e. don't let this wordly life delude you. It is a serious matter and to show you its serious, here is the most clear warning you can get. It has its same power no matter how many times you read it. Are we supposed to focus on it or even consider it as the reason for why we follow the Message of our Creator? You're right, we don't. The warning is there for everyone - it could be some people need this kind of warning to "wake them up" just as the very initial point and to avoid very deliberate serious wrongdoing etc. I believe Allah (swt) cares about our sincerity not all these details. That's why I think its so wrong when people say if you don't pray in a particular way it nullifies prayer. Allah (swt) sees and knows the effort of a faithful servant.
I have no idea if it is Shaytan, I'm not sure what Shaytan is but I don't think it matters. Simply seek refuge with Allah, as Allah advises. I'm not sure why you're scared at night but it's just another part of Allah's creation, it is He that has setup the system and all of it belongs to Him.
You shouldn't think Allah does not want to help you. The fact you are here doing all of this, and are clearly interested says a lot. Allah cares for us more than anyone else does. I know sometimes people look at the world and think how is this possible, but there is a lot we don't know and we seem to focus on the trials rather than the blessings. I'm not just talking at the blessings such as when we ask for specific blessings, I'm referring every single blessing that allows us to exist. Could we create all of this? Some people might think so, but we only create with the resources and knowledge that Allah bestows. (sorry, that's going on a big of a tangent.)
You don't need to apologise. We can have those times where we feel less connected with Allah, just stay steadfast. Maybe those are the times when we actually are even closer to Allah than we imagine because of our steadfastness.
No problem, I'm glad if I can help. )
I'm sorry to hear that, you've been through a lot. The dreams are not necessarily fake, but just have faith in Allah's promise. He's been caring for our souls since their inception. If you just happened to have a bad dream as well, but it could just be for another reason, don't worry yourself about whether its real or not.
Hello
I wanted to thank you for that sweet post. I have prayed today without Hijab (headscarf) and with honesty, but i dont know if its ok. Still very very uncertain of what i am doing. I prayed 1 time today. Tomorrow i will try to pray 2 times ..
Anyway, i would like to know if anyone can describe the feeling they get when they are talking to Allah swt or the light they might be receiving is a genuine feeling.. because i want to pay more attention and focus more in my salaat.
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Salam
I can remember what it was like when I had to find that much of what I had firmly believed was not correct. it is clear that you feel like you're in a hole. thirty years to believe in something and to be convinced of it, and after being forced to realize that it is not so as was thought, is not easy. but be sure that God will help you. In fact he has already do so HE helped you that you has woken up and has led you to found the way to the Quran alone ).God is there and is always the same. People have always asked him for help and fasted -all a bit different.
It's not so much the form what it counts, but the content. Prayer is primarily for you alone. God does not need it. It gives you strength, peace, relaxation, help and more. ) If you have not discovered how many times yet, then just go on and start - God will help you!
I have already said elsewhere my opinion that many paths lead to God, because we are all different. But you are certainly on the right track, don't let different opinions confuse you. read the Quran itself and trying to understand it - God is the teacher of the Quran, and he gives wisdom to whom he will , try to ask HIM - and He will answer you. )
and don't be sad!
peaceIt is very very hard to change your way of thinking and trying to "reboot" yourself.
Its a learning process. But i want to experience that feeling of peace and comfort in my prayer or even when i am just talking to Allah some kind of feeling that comes over me ..
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Hello
I wanted to thank you for that sweet post. I have prayed today without Hijab (headscarf) and with honesty, but i dont know if its ok. Still very very uncertain of what i am doing. I prayed 1 time today. Tomorrow i will try to pray 2 times ..
Anyway, i would like to know if anyone can describe the feeling they get when they are talking to Allah swt or the light they might be receiving is a genuine feeling.. because i want to pay more attention and focus more in my salaat.
Hi,
My pleasure. If you prayed with honesty, of course its ok! Allah (swt) gives us examples of the Prophets or other believers prayer and one thing that shines through is their sincerity. When I communicate with Allah (swt), I feel relaxed and rejuvenated. I actually used to pray with a headscarf initially when I came back to Islam but I kept forgetting to put it on, and I realised it didn't affect the way I prayed. Of course, some people like it because it feels humbling, so whatever suits each person. I also feel Allah's (swt) Mercy, Love and response and incredibly moved when I pray and then listen or read to the Quran prayerfully asking Allah to guide me. Even when I don't understand the words in Arabic I am moved, I think it speaks to our inner self - not to sound too mysterious.
It is very very hard to change your way of thinking and trying to "reboot" yourself.
Its a learning process. But i want to experience that feeling of peace and comfort in my prayer or even when i am just talking to Allah some kind of feeling that comes over me ..
If you keep loving God and praying openly, you will feel it in my opinion. You may feel complete peace and release straight away or it may take more time.
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Salam
I can remember what it was like when I had to find that much of what I had firmly believed was not correct. it is clear that you feel like you're in a hole. thirty years to believe in something and to be convinced of it, and after being forced to realize that it is not so as was thought, is not easy. but be sure that God will help you. In fact he has already do so HE helped you that you has woken up and has led you to found the way to the Quran alone ).God is there and is always the same. People have always asked him for help and fasted -all a bit different.
It's not so much the form what it counts, but the content. Prayer is primarily for you alone. God does not need it. It gives you strength, peace, relaxation, help and more. ) If you have not discovered how many times yet, then just go on and start - God will help you!
I have already said elsewhere my opinion that many paths lead to God, because we are all different. But you are certainly on the right track, don't let different opinions confuse you. read the Quran itself and trying to understand it - God is the teacher of the Quran, and he gives wisdom to whom he will , try to ask HIM - and He will answer you. )
and don't be sad!
peaceI miss you sister mirjamnur... http//2.bp.blogspot.com/-rnfZUujszZI/UZEFYJ269-I/AAAAAAAADnw/BbB-v_QWo1w/s1600/facebook-frown-emoticon.png I wonder where are you now?
I hope you are alright. group
Peace.
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It is very very hard to change your way of thinking and trying to "reboot" yourself.
Its a learning process. But i want to experience that feeling of peace and comfort in my prayer or even when i am just talking to Allah some kind of feeling that comes over me ..
Salaam Sister,
Do not be depressed or fear that Allah does not understand you. I hope soon you will see the beauty in your struggle as you continue to educate yourself. Do not worship as your family/community does just because they are family/community. There is wisdom to found in the story of Ibrahim. Constantly challenging yourself to find God through your own means is something every Muslim should do. The more light you ask for, the more light you shall receive, insha'Allah. jedi
Ijtihad for all!
peace
peace
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Depression can be useful I think, life changing. Don't write it off as just sadness, nor seek a cure - you do not need to be 'fixed'. It is God working on you.
What is that saying? ..."Never be afraid of being under pressure - that is how diamonds are made."
http//i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01853/diamond_1853132b.jpg
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exercise your will it's like a push-up you can't do one at first but with a crazy force of will you'll soon do salaat. dude you really have to force it, the reason you can't pray is because your caught in a speed of life (kinda like living in the fast lane you can't settle for a quite country life). you must gain control over your life and your soul or you will slowly lose the abilities to make choices. read the ayat about those who take for their god their own vain desires. might apply at the moment.
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Peace,
Hehe, diamonds are a sign of God on their bare own
$ $
_'_/God bless you
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Dear Memberofislam
I get the impression that you are too much subject to outside pressures, that you let yourself be guided by what comes from outside you.
Be a little with yourself, without fear, love yourself, think yourself, think for yourself, talk with yourself, with your most inner self, if you can find it or as inner as you are able to get. There, you will met God, your Lover. He will gide you. Shut out all things worldly that only make you angry and stressed. And I stress love yourself, God made specially and specifically, you are, and you are something, something that God wanted to be. You are holy in that sense. Treat yourself like that. And take your time. You do not have to pass any exam on religion or faith. Just please yourself, your most honest inner self. The world is nothing, it is noise. You get in peace with yourself and be kind to yourself, because you are the one thing God created of which you are absolutely in charge. Take good care of yourself because you are His Creation and His most immediate lover. Nothing else counts. Assume that and I believe you will be able to contend without much suffering with all the noises of the world, all the big trouble people make out nothings.
So, again, be kind to yourself, because you are vlose to your Lover and Master and He loves you, and made specifically.
Salaam
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Salaam,
As I see this topic is from last year, but I do hope you are fine than before and no more depressed.
If still not, do not be too hard on yourself. I was the exact way few months ago. I was extremely confused. Actually, not few months ago, but 2-3 years ago, but that I thought Shatan was straying me away and questioning my Sunni believes. That time I did not know Hadiths and was ignorant. I just somehow had thought Hadiths were Prophet sayings and were saved by God like Qur'an. Well, I was a child too and was depressed for other reasons too.
Anyway, back to your post, so again, do not be hard on yourself. One way to get rid of all these feelings is to know God loves you A LOT. Put all your trust on God and pray whatever happens is for the best one to happen which God wants and is the right way. It worked for me. It is not that I am no more confused anymore. No, I am, but it is NOTHING compared to before. I just leave everything to God, put trust in him, and it always works for me. I always feel like God is close and like talking to me. It is hard to explain in words. And, I am no more depressed and anything anymore thankfully.
So you will find the right way. In fact, the fact that you've these confusions and questions is because God wants you to be guided. So do not ignore it else you will always be in doubt.
Just be positive, don't be too hard on yourself, remember God is extremely close to you and loves you, put completely trust in him and work towards the confusion you have to seek answer. Also, stay away from negative thoughts, people, and things.I hope this helps.
May God guide us all. God bless you.
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Hi everyone
I would like to tell you my story in short. ( i am not so good in telling stories )
I have been born an raised a Sunni Muslimah in a traditional family. I always loved Eid, Ramadan and everything about it.
A couple of years ago (2004) i was in my early 20's and very very confused about life. I stumbled across a website that spoke on Quran Only (without hadith) i was really IN SHOCK. I started to really believe what was said but confused at the same time. I could not believe what i read. All my life we lived according to all these rituals. I wasn't the best in performing all these rituals so i didn't really do them all (what pissed my parents off -p)
After this shocking info, i just thought, fuck it, i am not doing this sh** no more so i went out and i try to forget about islam because it was too difficult.
When my father died a couple of years ago, i started thinking about life again (still going out at that time)
Now i have a boyfriend over 3 years and he we was also very strict, but i thought thats what i need to get back on track.
Now i "accidentilly' come across this website (last week) and i am all confused again. My confusion of 2004 is still not over.
I took off my head scarf and i dont pray. If i think of praying i dont wanna do it. Even though i really believe that Quran only is good.
I dont know whats wrong with me...
I have been reading all week about Quran only and how to pray or fast, i dont know how to do any of it. I see Rashad Khalifa praying 5 times and i some other people say 3 times.
I am confused
But the one thing that has positively changed in me is this
I have stopped seeing Allah as a man with a long beard who is always angry and trust me i have been thinking this for almost 30 years.
Now i see Allah as a light that i wanna be a part of
I just need the extra push and advice from fellow Quranist or better yet just Muslim
(sorry for my English)
Peace/Salaam
Hello and very welcome!
Many of us have suffered the fear and stifness coming from traditionalism and that irrational pressure to copy movements, phrases, and whatever things all day or we are going to hell.God wants for us ease, not difficulty. Why were you feeling depressed?
Sometimes, even being a believer, when I face confusion I try my best, and some days I take a rest when I need it...
I think many of us humans and most of religious people tend to forget how to forgive themselves, dont feel guilty Just try to make amends in the right way.
For you have been given the time for mending errors as you can, and to change and learn and become a better person. And be patient with yourself, for God is the most Merciful, and to His path we must rush. Good deeds compensate the bad!
