im very depressed:( read please
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Nop i didnt, she is a christian ...
... and!?
You're (a self-proclaimed) what!?If ye truly love each other,
& don't intend to cheat on one another,
then the 'Fidelity rule' shouldn't pose any "problem"!~ Or is it that you had other plans in mind?
... and she only have her mom. we agreed just us two.
Did you even bother to acquire her mom's consent at all!?
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Dear agphys
Salam.
Per my humble understanding The essential characteristics of a valid marriage is articulated in the below verse
55 The day - the delicious (things) are legitimized for you, and food of those who were given the book is allowed for you and your food is allowed for them; and the chaste women among the faithful and the chaste women among those who were given the book from before you - when you have given them their rewards being chaste without being lascivious and not to take as (illicit) lovers. And whoever represses (faith) in faith (itself) then surely he makes his actions worthless and in the hereafter he will be among the losers.
(My personal translation, cross checking is recommended.)
So a valid marriage should have the following characteristics
- The groom gives the bride a reasonable gift/reward which is acceptable to the bride.
- The marriage is not reduced to a formality to enjoy physical pleasure only ? there should be genuine intension to join/start a family.
- The marriage is not used as an excuse/mechanism to take a secret lover.
The entire idea behind the institution of marriage is that there is transparency and openness to the relationship to the society so that one party cannot take unfair advantage over the other.
Hope this verse will help you evaluate your relationship.
May Allah guide us all to the straight route.
Regards,
Arman -
This thread has got to be a joke.
Marrying someone just because you want to have sex with them?! -/
It is hardly befitting for the supposedly sacred constitution of marriage.
I think you brought important point here, es.
Maybe people should ponder the above question.
@ agphys
I'm not convinced that the Christians are ahlul kitaab (the people of the book).
So, I'm not sure that a muslim is allowed to marry with a Christian, but this is my personal point of view.
Salaam.
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I fail to understand why kissing and hugging would be bad. I sometimes try to look into distant past and wonder whether back in Prophets' time they were considered sexual. OP seems to be serious. So I don't see anything wrong with his choice unless he finds her incompatible.
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I can't make a head or tail of what the OP is talking. Something tells me that someone is just playing around here, trying to get our views on kissing, hugging and pre-marital sex. This is my understanding after considering agphys' earliest posts in this forum. Sorry if i turn out wrong.
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I had a feeling that this is his first romantic experience and he liked it. I suppose that's a very common effect. He is still in two minds because a part of him longs for it and another one is telling him its wrong. I am just not understanding the meaning of marriage he mentioned. Aren't we supposed to have legal paper for it? Just as a member mentioned, its a contract. Marriage is a serious business. I am not sure how two people agreeing to it without witnesses can be considered legal. Even here in US, the law says that witness must be present. I think it is pretty practical. It minimizes betrayal of "I never married him/her".
What is this? o
thank you!
im still trying to find some people that can make the lashing, but ive asked 4 different masjids and they all say they wont do it since sweden isnt using sharia law, but i tell them the quran says so and that it just feels right...I didn't notice it before.
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In me view, he should make it clear what is love and what is sex. What he did to me is part of affection and love and I do not think those acts are sexual.
However if he falls into the trap of desire for flesh, his acts may lead to the sexual intercourse, if he is not careful.I advise him to enjoy the feeling of love, romance and affection as long as he can, because the moment he went for the big thing, he is gonna lose all or large part of the feelings he has for her now -)
Cheers
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I can't make a head or tail of what the OP is talking. Something tells me that someone is just playing around here, trying to get our views on kissing, hugging and pre-marital sex. This is my understanding after considering agphys' earliest posts in this forum. Sorry if i turn out wrong.
Good point
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This thread has got to be a joke.
Marrying someone just because you want to have sex with them?! -/
It is hardly befitting for the supposedly sacred constitution of marriage.
Its kind of cute and funny at the same time, and just shows humanity has no real control over themselves.
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Salaam,
When you feel / know that something goes wrong the only option is to istaghfaar 2816], 723] and many more. Try to get away from those things and never even think of doing so. This is how you can do islah of your deeds. And don't forget to seek Allah's help on every matter.
May Allah increase our knowledge and guide us on His path pr
mmKhanALSO more important and supporting aiyat
1311 Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves....
i am 25 Alhamduillah i change myself alot even though i never hugged or kissed a girl , and allah is also changing me more n more now a days ..
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Are you in this for sex or are you serious and dedicated with this relationship? first of all isn't it forbidden to go with a disbelieving woman as a man?
Anyway, you are more worried about sinning than doing good deeds, that's my point of view. But if you're not engaging a relationship with the aim of founding a family and raise kids, what's the purpose? You're just in it for sex then. There's a reason it's not kosher to have sex before marriage, just look at all these degenerated westerners who aimlessly have sex with as many people as they can for social status. They don't care about the future, only the moment, that's the typical liberal "progressive" mentality, the "yolo" mentality, they think the world is overpopulated so they never become serious with their relationships. They consume like pigs, but when the clock runs out? They will buy all the fertility drugs in the world in order to have babies.
Make a choice. If you're not in it for the long term, dedicated relationship, then stop it there. Go to university, or find jobs, occupy your mind, find a hobby, read books. It's already hard to avoid consuming porn, it's harder to not become one of those aimless individual who just consumes till they get bored of it.
In the west, abortions are exploding, they are praised and encouraged, marriages rates are dropping fast and divorce rates are rising, single parent homes are becoming common, the cost of divorce scares men away from ever marrying, any kid that's lived through divorce always ends up in a very bad emotional state, it is clear the "sexual liberation" is a serious issue for the west, and the moral relativists do their best to ridicule anyone who's serious about building a family. Women are just used as receptacles and are told it's a good thing since they are little girls by the feminists.
Make your choice man, you don't just follow the quran, you analyse the world around you with what it teaches you.
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no in not in it for sex?
Btw, some friends of mine said they could lash me and theyre all muslims, but as we got to the 45th lash on my back a guy stopped and i regretted that i did this because its better to make taubah..please keep me in ur duas. I want ramadan now;(
