How to overcome the sin of lust/temptation
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Peace.
Here is a very good example of self control
1223
The lady of the house where he lived tried to seduce him. She closed the doors and said, "I am all yours." He said, "May God protect me. He is my Lord, who gave me a good home.* The transgressors never succeed."1224
She succumbed to him, and he almost succumbed to her, if it were not that he saw an "Ayat" from his Lord. We thus diverted evil and sin away from him, for he was one of our devoted servants.GOD protects the true believers from sin.
GOD bless .
Peace. -
Lust is very subjective and the same thing even for the same person may not mean the same at diffrent times. I do think that those who fall in temptation usually indulge in border lines thinking that they will not cross them but that hell why not just a bit.
It is not so much that we see nudes or this or that but what we allow ourselves or the attitude we take while those things are in front of our eyes.
Salaam
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Currently, I'm more inclined to the opinion that going near lewdness is when two persons (or more) are doing things that could bring them (or tempt them) to do zina, so it is like opening the door for committing zina.
Additional note
In my current opinion, zina (illegal sexual intercourse) is the example of lewdness/immorality (fahisha), or in other words I think zina is fahisha done in high degree, but the meaning of fahisha itself seems to be broader than zina.
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Lust is very subjective and the same thing even for the same person may not mean the same at diffrent times. I do think that those who fall in temptation usually indulge in border lines thinking that they will not cross them but that hell why not just a bit.
It is not so much that we see nudes or this or that but what we allow ourselves or the attitude we take while those things are in front of our eyes.
Salaam
Excellent post - very true indeed.
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I do not aprove of it but I do know that some people, men, may in fact fall in zina led to it by noble feelings of compassion and understanding, not gross beastly attitudes. That would be the kind of fall I personnally might forgive. Of course, it is the one that may lead also to greatest compplications, but I wanted to point out that not all "lust" is such lust, some may have sprung ot noble feelings, and as I say I would not approve of it, but it is completely different from what Man of Faith woud call animal thing, I just call it dirty mind. Because it is always the mind that finally leads and decides, may be not so in animals, but certainly inn humans.
Salaam
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Peace
And if an evil suggestion comes to you from Satan, then seek
refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is Hearing and Knowing.when confronted with sin of all types we should seek refuge
in Allah."A'ouzo billahi min-aash-shaitan-ir-rajeem"
lower the gaze
exit the area.
God knows best
peace
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Best protection against Satan is the 'Ten Commandments' and to wittily apply those to your lifestyle. Contemplate them rather than reinforce their strictness through a lot of religious laws, regulations and punishments.
Precautions
Care for your neighbor as yourself = Care for everyone in general. Empathy is a big win. This causes the most spiritual growth when clinging unto.
Do not murder = Do not become angry
No adultery = Do not look upon the other sex with desire
No theft = Do not greed for things - remember theft can be to dubiously acquire things at the expense of others even if it is not directly illegal by law.
No jealousy (do not covet) = Detach yourself from vanities and you do not need your neighbor's things anyway as you have something better.Everything of the decree is for a person to detached themselves from their primate self, their instinct.
Clinging unto the 'Rabb' does help, but not if you do not actively do something about it and look to your own spiritual growth. You need to be 'Who Is'. To find the 'Rabb' you first must find your true self.
Be safe
Amenuel -
Peace Huruf,
Thank you for your post.
How is that sin different fro any other? We know what is bad for us. We know what takes us away from our balance, so we deal with that kind of thing by reason and will. I know tht that something is wrong and I just try not to give in to temptation.
I think lust (outside of marriage/commitment) is a sin in islam, if it's acted upon. I believe that lust (outside of marriage/commitment), if acted upon, is different from many other sins. And it seems that lust (outside of marriage/commitment), is worse than many other sins. Because the Quran suggests that it's forbidden to go/come near lewdness (a word which is synonymous with the word lustfulness).
Quran 6151 Say, "Come let me recite to you what your Lord has forbidden for you that you should not set up anything with Him; and be kind to your parents; and do not kill your born children for fear of poverty, We provide for you and for them; and do not come near lewdness, what is plain of it or subtle; and do not kill the person which God has forbidden, except in justice. That is what He enjoined you that you may comprehend."
In verse 733, the Quran suggests that all lewd actions are forbidden.
Quran 733 Say, "My Lord has forbidden all lewd action, what is obvious from them and what is subtle, and sin, aggression without cause, your setting up partners with God that were never authorized by Him, and saying about God what you do not know."
The original Hebrew word for "sin" seems to have been mistranslated by Christians for many years. Because the word sin is a translation of the Hebrew term "het", which originally was an archery term that meant to "to miss the mark." In other words, the Hebrew term "het", is derived from a root which means to "miss the mark." And it seems that it's used for sins (errors/mistakes/spiritual blunders) that are committed inadvertently through ignorance or forgetfulness. The Hebrew word chata'ah (most often translated as sin), seems to have the same meaning as it's Greek and Arabic counterparts - khati'ah in arabic and hamartia in a form of Koine greek in the new testament. Let me share a quote by the muslim scholar Hamza Yusuf with you.
The word ?sin,? which, outside of the religious circle, has fallen out of favor in the modern world, is possibly related to a Saxon word that meant ?to wander.?
If someone does something without being present there, then he/she might commit a sin (miss the mark). Because he/she isn't completely conscious/heedful of the consequences of his/her actions. In other words, he/she has a "forgetful mind state" in that moment. And his/her forgetful state of mind, makes him/her miss the mark due to heedlessness/unawareness. On the other hand, if someone is fully conscious/alert/present in a moment, then he/she will most likely be in full control of his/her actions in that moment.
As mentioned earlier, the original Hebrew word for "sin" seems to have been mistranslated by Christians for many years. Thus, the word sin in the English translation of the Bible, is a mistranslation of the Hebrew word "het." Also, it seems that some words in some English translations of the Quran, have been wrongly translated as the word sin (e.g the words Dhanb and Jurm).
Take anger. What do we do when we feel anger overpowering us? Rein it in, do'nt we? Or vent a little without harm and then try to proceed to face whatever caused our anger in the most appropriate way.
I think you raise a good point. However, it seems that it's harder to rein in lust than to rein in anger. In my view, if one tries to control lust (outside of marriage/commitment), one only treats the symptom of this problem. Thus, it seems that by trying to control lust one doesn't treat the cause of the problem. What causes lust to appear in the first place? Is it possible to stop lust from happening/appearing in the first place? For example, if a muslim (submitter/peacemaker) desires to have sexual relations with the opposite sex (outside of marriage/commitment), will his/her actions and thoughts/intentions give him/her "a lustful state of mind"? Is lust "a state of mind" that appears/happens as a result of wrong actions and thoughts/intentions? If lust is "a state of mind" which appears/happens as a result of wrong actions and thoughts/intentions, isn't it prudent to not feed it with these things? If lust is "a state of mind" which appears/happens as a result of wrong actions and thoughts/intentions, will this "state of mind" disappear if we stop feeding it with the things which created it in the first place and are keeping it alive? If lust is "a state of mind" which appears/happens as a result of wrong actions and thoughts/intentions, is there a possibility that a lustful state of mind can make a man/woman apathetic/indifferent towards what is right and wrong, and overpower him/her to the point where he/she gives in to lust and then commits a sin by doing something which is against the moral values/principles of the Quran? And if lust is "a state of mind" which appears/happens as a result of wrong actions and thoughts/ intentions, isn't it prudent to identify the actions and thoughts/intentions which creates a lustful state of mind? I think these questions are worth pondering upon.
Tempptation is temptation with lust, with anger, with lying, with hate with whatever we encounter.
As far as I know, people are only angry for a short period. But when people become lustful it can last for very long periods (e.g several days or several months). Therefore, some temptations seem to be different than other temptations.
In my first post in this thread, I mentioned that I once read a quote from a text about religion. And I mentioned that the quote went like this "The cause of lust is desire."
I would like to share a few sentences of a Plato's Dialogue, Philebus, with you. In that Dialogue, Socrates states that hunger, thirst and other appetites of the same type belongs to the sphere/realm of desire
Socrates We commonly talk, do we not, of a man ?having thirst?? Meaning that he is becoming empty?. Then is his thirst a desire?
Protarchus Yes, a desire for drink. Socrates For drink, or for replenishment with drink?
Protarchus For replenishment with drink, I should think. Socrates When one becomes empty then, apparently he desires the opposite of what he is experiencing; being emptied, he longs to be filled.Socrates seems to suggest that desire is an attempt to fill an emptiness/void within oneself. If someone spends his/her time on other things than the improvement/development of himself/herself and/or doesn't help/serve others, then there is a possibility that he/she is avoiding the emptiness/void within himself/herself. For example, instead of improving himself/herself by learning theoretical and/or practical things and/or helping/serving others, a man/woman might spend many hours a day in front of the television, surfing the internet or playing video games. By spending many hours a day watching television, surfing the internet or playing video games, his/her hobbies might preoccupy and entertain him/her to such a great degree that he/she forgets his/her purpose in life. And it appears that his/her escapism will not fill his/her emptiness/void. It appears that his/her escapism will only make the problem worse. When escapism gets out of control, it might lead to a lustful state of mind. And if extreme escapism leads to a lustful state of mind, a human being might become indifferent/apathetic towards what is right and wrong and slowly but surely forget the moral principles/values of the Quran, and he/she might suddenly commit a sin by doing a lewd action. For example, a man/woman might intentionally watch a movie with a sexual scene or intentionally watch pictures of the opposite sex with little clothes on. If a man/woman who follows "islam based on the Quran", intentionally watches a movie with a sexual scene or intentionally watches a picture of the opposite sex with little clothes on, then there is a possibility that he/she is doing a lewd action. Because the Quran commands men and women to lower their gaze (see verses 2431-32).
From my understanding of the Quran, men and women shouldn't only lower their gaze when they are outside of their house (e.g. while they are walking in the street). But they should also lower their gaze when they read a magazine, a book, sit in front of their computer screen or watch television inside of their house. In my view, lowering ones gaze, doesn't mean to literally lower ones gaze towards the ground. I think lowering ones gaze, means to not look at the opposite sex in a lustful way. In addition to that, it seems that lowering ones gaze means to not look at any sexual scenes in movies, not look at pictures of the opposite sex with little clothes and not look at pictures with a sexual content.
As mentioned earlier, Socrates seems to suggest that desire is an attempt to fill an emptiness/void within oneself. In my view, an emptiness/void is psychological/spiritual. Therefore, it seems that only a psychological/spiritual purpose can fill the emptiness/void within us. Thus, it seems that spending many hours a day in front of the television, surfing the internet or playing video games, will not fill the emptiness/void within us. I am not saying that we shouldn't watch television, surf the internet or play video games, by the way. I myself like to watch television once in a while. And a few days ago I watched the first episode in a Television series by the name "A person of interest." I think it was a very interesting and insightful TV Show, and I liked it a lot. In addition to watching television, I like to surf the internet and play video games. But these days, I spend little time surfing the internet. And when it comes to playing video games, I haven't played any video games in a really long time.
I'd like to share some more thoughts and views/opinions regarding desire...
If desire is an attempt to fill an emptiness/void within oneself, then I think that there are two types of desire. It seems that there are natural desires (e.g. the pursuit of the spiritual and moral life) and unnatural desires (e.g. the pursuit of pleasure).
In verse 16116, the Quran suggests that the pursuit of pleasure can corrupt ones whole being.
Quran 16116 BUT, ALAS, among those generations before your time there were no people endowed with any virtue146 - who would speak out against the corruption on earth -except the few of them whom We saved , whereas those who were bent on evildoing only pursued pleasures which corrupted their whole being, and so lost themselves in sinning.
It seems that unnatural desires (e.g. the pursuit of pleasure), is detrimental to ones spiritual and moral growth in this life. The Quran suggests that there are people who have taken their desires as God (see verse 2543). Thus, if men and women who are muslims (submitters/peacemakers) follow their desires instead of following the moral principles/values in the Quran, there is a possibility that they will set up partners with God. And according to the Quran, shirk (polytheism/idolworship) is the only unforgivable sin in islam (see verse 44. Last but not least, the Quran suggests that those who follow their desire, instead of following God's guidance have went astray in the worst possible way (see verse 2850).
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Peace
And if an evil suggestion comes to you from Satan, then seek
refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is Hearing and Knowing.when confronted with sin of all types we should seek refuge
in Allah."A'ouzo billahi min-aash-shaitan-ir-rajeem"
lower the gaze
exit the area.
God knows best
peace
Not that it matters greatly, but here is what we are actually commanded to say brother
2396-98
Push away evil with that which is better. We are better aware of what they describe.
And say ?My Lord, I seek refuge with You from the whispers of the devils.?
?And I seek refuge with you O Lord that they should come near.? -
Peace es,
Thank you for your post.
I think lust is a great thing. It's how you control it that matters.
You might be right. However, I think that there is a difference between lust inside of marriage/commitment and lust outside of marriage/commitment. In my view, having lust/sexual feelings inside of marriage/commitment isn't detrimental for our spiritual journey. There seems to be a purpose behind lust. If someone only allows himself/herself to feel lust inside of marriage/commitment, and only allows lust to appear in a moderate/balanced and controlled way, then it seems that his/her feelings of lust will not be detrimental for his/her spiritual journey. It seems that "there is a right place and right time for everything (including lust)."
How boring and one-dimensional life would be without lust.
If a man and a woman are married and have little or no feelings of lust/infatuation towards each other, then their marriage might be a boring and one-dimensional marriage. And perhaps those who have such marriages, have boring lives as well. That being said, I think life can be an adventure even without lust. There is a quote which goes like this
"Life will always be to a large extent what we ourselves make it."
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Peace JavaLatte,
Thank you for your post.
I think I agree, it seems to be better/proper understanding than 'do not commit lewdness',
and perhaps to not go near lewdness means that we should avoid it.
I agree.
Hmm... I don't know for sure.
I'm not sure if something like that is the example of going near lewdness, but I think it doesn't seem right if someone does things like that purposely and repeatedly, because if someone likes to do such things, then I suppose there's possibility that he/she would be more easily tempted to commit lewdness when he/she meets the opportunity to do so.
Good point.
Currently, I'm more inclined to the opinion that going near lewdness is when two persons (or more) are doing things that could bring them (or tempt them) to do zina, so it is like opening the door for committing zina.
I see/understand.
Personally, I think that couple kissing and hugging romantically before marriage could be categorized as going near lewdness, and if we want to apply the very best understanding for ourselves, then I think we should avoid seeing movie which contains sexual scene, avoid reading book/novel/comic that contain lewd image and/or lewd story, do not collect pictures of models with immodest clothes, do not share such things to others, etc. I think it is better if we could avoid/stop/abstain from such things.
Good points.
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Peace good logic,
Thank you for your post.
GOD protects the true believers from sin.
I agree. The Quran suggests that Iblis (the devil) has no power/influence over the faithful servants of God (see verse 1542 and 1765).
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Peace sushi1992,
Thank you for your post.
Excellent post - very true indeed.
I think huruf has written some interesting and thoughtful posts in this thread.
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Peace hawk99,
Thank you for your post.
"To keep from falling off a cliff stay away from the edge"
peace
Thank you for sharing that quote.
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Peace Man of Faith,
Thank you for your post.
Clinging unto the 'Rabb' does help, but not if you do not actively do something about it and look to your own spiritual growth. You need to be 'Who Is'. To find the 'Rabb' you first must find your true self.
Thank you for your advice.
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Peace HP_TECH,
Thank you for your post.
Not that it matters greatly, but here is what we are actually commanded to say brother
2396-98
Push away evil with that which is better. We are better aware of what they describe.
And say ?My Lord, I seek refuge with You from the whispers of the devils.?
?And I seek refuge with you O Lord that they should come near.?Thank you for sharing that verse.
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In my first post in this thread I mentioned that I have found/discovered a very deep and profound book that sheds light on the sin of lust/temptation. The title of the book is Climbing Mount Purgatorio. And the book is written by the muslim scholar/thinker Hamza Yusuf. I found the information about lust (in the book) to be very insightful/enlightening. I'd like to share a few paragraphs from the book with you.
A few paragraphs from page 6-7 in the book
Lust is only possible with animal spirits and with vitality, and the excessiveness of it was a luxury, hence the name. In her essay on the deadly sins, Dorothy Sayers identifies two main reasons people are susceptible to the sin of luxuria
It may be through sheer exuberance of animal spirits in which case a sharp application of the curb may be all that is needed to bring the body into subjection and remind it of its proper place in the scheme of man?s twofold nature. Or?and this commonly happens in periods of disillusionment like our own, when philosophies are bankrupt and life appears without hope?men and women may turn to lust in sheer boredom and discontent, trying to find in it some stimulus which is not provided by the drab discomfort of their mental and physical surroundings. When that is the case, stern rebukes and restrictions are worse than useless. It is as though one were to endeavor to cure anemia by bleeding; it only reduces further an already impoverished vitality. The mournful and medical aspect of twentieth century pornography and promiscuity strongly suggests that we have reached one of these periods of spiritual depression, where people go to bed because they have nothing better to do. In other words, the ?regrettable moral laxity? of which respectable people complain may have its root cause not in Luxoria at all, but in some other of the sins of society, and may automatically begin to cure itself when that root cause is removed.
Is the ?root cause? not lust, but simply boredom? Kierkegaard believed that man?s inability to find any real meaning in life resulted in an indifference, cynicism, and boredom with it. The aesthete, who believes he is leading a life in pursuit of pleasure, exemplifies the nihilistic malaise of the modern age. The aesthete?s hedonistic life is rooted in his boredom. The irony is that the things that he finds to entertain and distract him from his boredom soon become the very sources of boredom ?The boredom that comes later is usually the fruit of a misguided diversion. It seems doubtful that a remedy against boredom can give rise to boredom, but it can give rise to boredom only insofar as it is used incorrectly.?
I deeply recommend the above-mentioned book.
You can download the book from this link
https//www.zaytuna.edu/search/?cx=002397786386501349090%3A02uby0ud8m4&cof=FORID%3A10&ie=UTF-8&q=Download&x=0&y=0
Click on the link "Climbing Mount Purgatorio" on the top of the page (to download the book).
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Taro, I think you are makig too many assumptions may be because you believe that what you feel everybody feels. There are all kinds of people.
You said anger lasts very little and lust stays. Not so. The expresion of anger may last more or less, anger is not the same as the expression of anger. Also, even expression, it can last very long. The only limit may be the physical effort limit, exactly as with lust. The only limit is physical capability. Anger may not pour in expressionn but that does not mean that it is ot there.
I insist, lust is just like any other sin. Desire is not a sin, indulging in ustful desire beyond what is healthy is in, like all sins the sing is against oneself. You undo yourself. The question is to know what you feel, to ackinowledge what you feel and then take the reins. desire el helathy a powerful, but like everything else you must hold the reins, same as with anger. Anger is not wrong, what is wrong is to lt angr lead you. But anger gives the necessary push to fight against wrong, against abuse, against misfortune, one misfortune or other people misfortune. But one must hold the reins. Same with desire. Lust is giving in to the pitfalls of desire.
Whe the Qur'an says fawahish in 6.151 and 7.33 as you quoted, is does not say lustful actions as you intepret, precisely what it says ma dhahara minha wa ma batana, fawahish may be not an action, may be a thought,may be an indulging in thoughts that are not healthy and which obviously if you indulge inthem you are coming ear to fahisha, precisely what the aya says not to do, to come near it.
Other people's clothes or doing have nothing to do with it. You have to do with it. whatever it is.
Desir is about the deepest longest standing passion of a human, as you say, it is thirst, it is hunger, it is desire for the deepest experience and feeling, for death even. It is the motor of human transcendance,it is the inner voice who calls as to the most unknown.
You mention aya 16.161 but you must have made an error because it doesn't say what you quote. May be you can check.
Pleasure is pleasure, nothing wrong with it , but obviously it must be a healthy pleasure.
Lust inside marriage and outside marriage. You can be a pig inside marriage, not only outside. And I mean ugly and mean.
I really feel that there is a lot of darkness about sex in people's minds. There is also a lot of curiosity which may also lead many people, specially the young to commit errors, sometimes heavy ones, or to become obssessed. Also sex is very prone to be taken as a show of worldly success. Also as a measure of power.
Sex in astrology belongs to the eigth house, which is also the house of power, of death... We could say that it is the house of desire, because it deals with the most trascendent urges and mos subconscious passions. We are servants of death while we are alive because we know we will finally give in to it. Sex is just a pretaste of death.
Today people do not want to know anything about death, and makes light of sex, a part of the entertainment industry. Also sex becomes a sewer for othr things. People try to compensate with sex failures or the sense of failures in other realms. It being instintive we do not grsp it intellectually just as we do nnot grasp intllectualy many times our emotions, all those things become a muddle where many people get lost.
Sex is not a sin, but an aya, however to make light of sex is dangerous and takes its toll, at the social level and at the personal level.
Salaam