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  4. Help with 4:128

Help with 4:128

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Questions/Comments on the Quran
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  • U Offline
    U Offline
    unknownuser
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Hello everyone,

    I'm really hoping you could help me. Please, I feel like I am on the verge of losing my faith.
    I have always been skeptical of polygamy, and it's been one of the main causes whenever I felt distant from Islam (as being unfair/cruel). However I reconciled by thinking Allah only allows it in certain conditions. However as I came about verse 4128 and read the tafsir my heart felt really upset. I don't support hadiths, however the tafsir for that is hard to ignore. Apparently it makes polygamy so easy for men, they can tell their wife to be okay with them spending less time with them or else get divorced. http//www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=598&Itemid=59.

    I always felt like because Allah acknowledged polygamy as being unfair (4129) he'd make it harder to perform, however now it's just getting easier for the man because he can get his wife to forfeit her rights or else threaten her with divorce. I thought it wasn't allowed for a man to trade his wife for a younger wife however in the tafsir he is doing exactly that, and he's being supported by a revelation???

    I have always loved islam because I viewed it on the surface but now as I study further I see how some things are so unfair to women and it's a very disturbing feeling to deal with , but I do not want to lose my faith so please if anyone could reconcile some truths. Please do not say it's fair because no way is it fair for a woman to give up her right to her husband just so she can avoid being divorced and he can spend time with his new young wife (but this is exactly what the tafsir says). I don't know how long I can do this for.

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    • I Offline
      I Offline
      imrankhawaja
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      peace brother,

      its a misconception about islam that allowed man to have a license of getting 4 marriages ..

      about (tafseers)/interpretation it was always manmade comments on analysing the verses which can be differ from mind to mind..

      you can find better tafssers/interpretation here if God willing..

      as far i think the context of the verses applied to the people of that time when a historical battle between believers and disbeleivers occur and lot of believing women lost their mates in sudden event , due to the lesson of not carrying the command of their leaders..

      with that situation in hand its adviseable to them to get married with them and support them as it was an early face of the teaching of prophet muhammad..

      but even at that occassion the human feelings and equality are key points what author never miss..

      now look from that angle with God willing you ll grasp the message ..when you link 43 with 4129 u ll get a clear picture..

      .. its best to read quran with cross refrencing...

      God bless you

      as a personal opinion that full chapter is about the rights of orphans instead of wishful thinking of four marriages if you read from very first verse u ll see all that time author is about securing the rights of orphans

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      • U Offline
        U Offline
        unknownuser
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Thats actually comforting to hear.
        But then why do polygamous marriages happen in this day and age when they do nothing but hurt the women and children.
        is there any reason why Allah made it so unclear. perhaps he was just testing us.

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        • H Offline
          H Offline
          huruf
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Anybody with enough sway or power can make the Qur'a or any text whatsoever to say whatever he fancies.

          To ignore that through history there have been many people interested in making the Qur'an say things that suit them and that they have the power not only to make the text work for them but to stick the new meanings imposed on it it is equivlent to choose wrong over right and rennounce righteousness because it is more comfortabe to stick to known ground.

          That is wat has hapenned with the Qur'an in any question that touche women, which would e in fact almost every question. And poligamy clearly touchhes them.

          Actually the Qur'an does not forbid either female or male poligamy, but on the other hand it makes it plaib the marriage, ordinary marriage if there are no particular circumstances, demographical or human that advice otherwise, is monogamous, abundantly supported in all injonctions given regarding marriage which are always exposed as referring to a sole spouse.

          Tale the ayas regarding inheritance, they say children in plural, they say brothers or sisters and speak about their number, but never says anything about leaving more than one wife, it says if there is a wife, it never says if thhere is a wife or wives. Same with other instances.

          For me any interpretation of 4.128 in the sense that it touches poligamy is a novelty, although I am not suprised any more at anything.

          On thhe other hand 4.3 does not speak about poigamy but about orphans and marrying their mothers, and it does not say, at all, that one man can marry more thhan one. It is addressed to the believers in general and it is an injunction to whoever is able to marry a mother of orphans, that is, if with the support of the community of believers, two men are able and willing, they could marry one woman each, if three men are able and willing then equally they may marry one woman each, etc. etc. That is what should be readily understood.

          Only if other circumstances are imagined, like a society where no single men were available or no single women were available or other sircumstances that made it humanly advisable for anybody to have more than one spouse at a time, that would be admissible.

          Salaam

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          • I Offline
            I Offline
            imrankhawaja
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Actually the Qur'an does not forbid either female or male poligamy

            Only if other circumstances are imagined, like a society where no single men were available or no single women were available or other sircumstances that made it humanly advisable for anybody to have more than one spouse at a time, that would be admissible.

            so you are trying to say, a women and man both can have as many partners as they want ... ?

            BOLD part in case there is one women in town , and she is married to somebody else and is it recommendable she do poligamy for the need of other males ..? and single man in town vice verse

            when these topics come your level of analysis does not make any sense.. in many logics

            dnt you see a problem in case of women poligamy , who is the father of kid if she is sleeping with 3 polygamy partners at same time ? (not foursome ) i mean to say 2 days to each partner a week

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            • I Offline
              I Offline
              imrankhawaja
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Thats actually comforting to hear.
              But then why do polygamous marriages happen in this day and age when they do nothing but hurt the women and children.
              is there any reason why Allah made it so unclear. perhaps he was just testing us.

              brother Allah make it very clear , along with lot of other things its human who always make things unclear..

              this day lot of other things are happening in the cover of religion approved by so called people ..its just not only polygamy

              stonning to death
              chopping off the hands of thiefs
              suicide bombing in the name of jihad
              honour killing
              forcing women to cover their head or full face
              beating wives allowed
              list is still going on...

              so forget about the people , worry about your own neck, you are responsible for yourself.. let people do what they want to do..

              you cant stop them from lie, cheat, dishonesty and lot of other things..

              yeh but we held accountable for what we earn, no body will gona carry the load of others..

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              • WakasW Online
                WakasW Online
                Wakas
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                peace Baitachal,

                Your first mistake was reading tafsir and thinking it is accurate. It is often not.

                Please see
                http//www.misconceptions-about-islam.com/polygamy-islam-4-wives.htm

                See here for translation of 4128-129
                http//www.quran434.com/wife-beating-islam.html#part2

                All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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