Managing your ego as a believer
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Peace
So obviously as Muslims we have to stay humble and not think of ourselves as better than others. However in the Qur'an it states that believers are few, most people are destined for Hell. That we are the best community.
So if we know the above, how do we stay humble. Do we tell ourselves the opposite of the above? That we are not the best people?
It's not that I have an ego (at least I think I don't overall haha) but even reading a passage like 'you are the best community' enters one's subconscious mind and it lingers there. How does one deal with this i.e. how does one stay humble knowing this?
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Peace
Firstly to be a believer is not an easy job. We cant be 100 percent certain that we are not doing something wrong . So its a continuous process to attain the level of certainty to be a true believer. God alone can increase our faith.
82 The believers are those whom, when God is mentioned, their hearts reverence; and when His revelations are recited to them, it increases their faith; and they put their trust in their Lord.
484 He is the One who sends down tranquility into the hearts of the believers, so that they may increase in faith along with their present faith. And to God belong the soldiers of the heavens and the earth, and God is Knowledgeable, Wise.
So its safe to say we have submitted to GOD Alone.
4914 The Arabs said, "We acknowledge." Say, "You have not acknowledged; but you should say, 'We have peacefully surrendered', for acknowledgement has not yet entered into your hearts." If you obey God and His messenger, He will not put any of your works to waste. God is Forgiver, Compassionate.
We need to stay humble and learn to control our ego. We need to listen to others opinions and critically evaluate everything we are doing. Its very easy to go astray of the right path. So we need to ask for GOD's help humbly.
245 Seek help through patience, and the Contact prayer. It is a difficult thing, but not so for the humble.
231 The believers are indeed successful.
232 Those who are humble when making their contact prayer(following divine orders closely).3119 "And be humble in how you walk and lower your voice. For the harshest of all voices is the voice of the donkeys."
3335 Surely, the peacefully surrendering men, and the peacefully surrendering women, the acknowledging men, and the acknowledging women, the obedient men, and the obedient women, the truthful men, and the truthful women, the patient men, and the patient women, the humble men, and the humble women, the charitable men, and the charitable women, the fasting men, and the fasting women, the men who guard their private parts, and the women who similarly guard, and the men who commemorate God frequently, and the commemorating women; God has prepared for them a forgiveness and a great recompense.
And we cant never be proud of serving GOD Alone.
4172 The Messiah would not be too proud to be a servant to God, nor would the controllers who are close to Him. Whoever is too proud from His service, and is arrogant, then He will summon them all before Him.
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It's not that I have an ego (at least I think I don't overall haha) but even reading a passage like 'you are the best community' enters one's subconscious mind and it lingers there. How does one deal with this i.e. how does one stay humble knowing this?
To be frank, even by reading this statement, I can say that you do have an ego.
So if we know the above, how do we stay humble. Do we tell ourselves the opposite of the above? That we are not the best people?
The state of no ego is simple You will think that everyone and everything are US, part of US.
No more them, you and I.That's a tall order and one can achieve it only through progress.. through evolution, where ego are being controlled step by step, stages by stages.
No more thought or even desire that I or We are better/superior than others.
No more envy if you or them have something better than I or Us. Given there will be no more you or them.
No more hate against you or them. Given there will be no more you or them.
No more pride of My achievement, because you're aware that it's not you who are achieving, you were only playing your role within a larger orchestration of us.
You're fully aware that you actually don't exist,Siddharta calls such state as reaching the state of full enlightenment, the state of Nirvana.
Lao Tse calls such state as achieving harmony with the Tao. -
Peace
So obviously as Muslims we have to stay humble and not think of ourselves as better than others. However in the Qur'an it states that believers are few, most people are destined for Hell. That we are the best community.
So if we know the above, how do we stay humble. Do we tell ourselves the opposite of the above? That we are not the best people?
It's not that I have an ego (at least I think I don't overall haha) but even reading a passage like 'you are the best community' enters one's subconscious mind and it lingers there. How does one deal with this i.e. how does one stay humble knowing this?
There is no harm if you think that you are better than others if you really feel and if you really are.. that gives you confidence... But it doesn't mean you won't act that i am better than others and show it off... that's humble and being humility...
Believers are always best in the eyes of God... but let that be between God and believers.. But let believers behave with humility with all the people.... coz even believers do not know the fate of them....
Just be simple and honest....that's it.. -
There is no harm if you think that you are better than others if you really feel and if you really are.. that gives you confidence... But it doesn't mean you won't act that i am better than others and show it off... that's humble and being humility...
Believers are always best in the eyes of God... but let that be between God and believers.. But let believers behave with humility with all the people.... coz even believers do not know the fate of them....
Just be simple and honest....that's it..Peace Jkhan,
I think feeling of superiority is the cause of all evil. Iblis rejected the command of GOD due to that feeling and was banished. I cant feel superior to anyone . I don't know others struggle and situation. We are born with different situations and tests.
However I can see the following verses which could be relevant
3110 You were the best nation that emerged for the people, you ordered kindness and prohibited vice, and believed in God. If the people of the Book believed it would have been better for them; from among them are the believers, but the majority are the wicked.
3139 Do not be weak, and do not grieve, for you will have the upper hand, if you are believers.
The Monotheist Group (The Quran A Monotheist Translation)
4829 Mohammed is the messenger of God, and those who are with him are severe against the rejecters, but merciful between themselves. You see them kneeling and prostrating, they seek the blessings and approval of God. Their distinction is in their faces, as a result of prostrating. Such is their example in the Torah. And their example in the Gospel is like a plant which shoots out and becomes strong and thick and it stands straight on its trunk, pleasing to the farmers. That He may enrage the rejecters with them. God promises those among them who believe and do good works a forgiveness and a great reward.
Muhammad Asad (The Message Of Quran)
4829 MUHAMMAD is God's Apostle; and those who are with him are firm and unyielding43 towards all deniers of the truth, full of mercy towards one another.44 Thou canst see them bowing down, prostrating themselves , seeking favour with God and goodly acceptance their marks are on their faces, traced by prostration.45 This is their parable in the Torah as well as their parable in the Gospel46 like a seed that brings forth its shoot, and then He strengthens it, so that it grows stout, and stands firm upon its stem, delighting the sowers. so that through them He might confound the deniers of the truth.47 unto such of them as may attain to faith and do righteous deeds, God has promised forgiveness and a reward supreme.48 -
Yes ST1111…
The arrogance is the fundamental reasons behind the failure of human’s test…It’s a sickness in human nature… Humility only can kill the EGO… I mean to say that considering the self nothing in front of what God has created…. But having to know where we stand among other human is harmless… If we consider ourself better than others when it comes to the wealth we have, it can help our heart to spend on others and do more charity to those who are less fortunate than us….know the self and know about others.. that’s harmless.. but reacting with the misfortunes of others while we are in a situation of upper hand is arrogance … there we develop ego…
Humility only can kill such situation…Feeling superiority is not always the kicking point for evil cause in my personal understanding and experience.. But taking superiority as a weapon and boasting on that is the cause.....You can take superiority for positive approaches.... no harm..
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Peace,
The ego is a fiction / illusion created by the mind. We are not the ego, we are the consciousness that observes the ego heap of thoughts, all that follows the "I am" the name first name, social situation, professional ...
The ego judge, react ... etc. When we are identified with a thought, our consciousness is eclipsed by this identification, we become our thoughts, we lose the freedom to act because the thoughts take control over the individual.
The ego is our companion / qareen who misleads the majority of the right path.
to be free from the ego and his manipulations, become aware of his thoughts.
When we are aware, thoughts become our ally and at our service as for the prophet Solomon.
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Try to learn and understand the principles you're being taught with honesty, try to apply them in every moment of your life with honesty. See if you still have room to think you're better than others ?
There are multiple ways of pleasing oneself and those kind of thoughts are one of them, all you're doing you is bring a little bit of self-satisfaction to yourself. But again, reason keeps your thoughts straight.The ego is our companion / qareen who misleads the majority of the right path.
to be free from the ego and his manipulations, become aware of his thoughts.
When we are aware, thoughts become our ally and at our service as for the prophet Solomon.
Interesting comparison.
I have always considered being in control of oneself akin of being a king over a kingdom. If there is chaos within, soon the king loses his throne and becomes a slave.
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If we consider ourself better than others when it comes to the wealth we have, it can help our heart to spend on others and do more charity to those who are less fortunate than us….know the self and know about others.. that’s harmless.. but reacting with the misfortunes of others while we are in a situation of upper hand is arrogance … there we develop ego…
Even thinking that we're more/less fortunate than them and/or we are in a situation of upper/lower hand, those idea came from ego.
Because that's how ego works, ensuring superiority and survival.
A state of no ego or at least controlled ego will enable one to spend on others even if others are MORE fortunate.
Helping others even when he or she is in a situation of LOWER hand compared to others.Confused? That's normal because the above procedure doesn't make sense to ego.
Example
A think that he has more wealth than B, A helped out B to gain more wealth.
Then B start to gain wealth and B now has more wealth than A, A starting to feel threatened because B now has more wealth than A. A is now no longer more superior than B in terms of wealth and feel threatened, A started to seek way to either gain more wealth than B or to reduce wealth of B to gain superiority. Such self imposed judgement will actually put more suffering to A.The ego can works very much from the perspective of B. Thinking that B has less wealth than A, B will seek out the way to gain more wealth than A or to reduce A's wealth. Such self imposed judgement will actually put more suffering to B.
Real world situation, on a global scale, can be observed on relationship between USA and China.
China was poor and backward, USA helped China to grow their economy, the objective back then was more to gravitate China away from Russia and Communism.
China started to grow their economy and now USA feel threatened because China could take over USA in terms of economy and starting to view China as it's ENEMY.Ego always works to ensure superiority and survival.
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Even thinking that we're more/less fortunate than them and/or we are in a situation of upper/lower hand, those idea came from ego.
Because that's how ego works, ensuring superiority and survival.
A state of no ego or at least controlled ego will enable one to spend on others even if others are MORE fortunate.
Helping others even when he or she is in a situation of LOWER hand compared to others.Confused? That's normal because the above procedure doesn't make sense to ego.
Example
A think that he has more wealth than B, A helped out B to gain more wealth.
Then B start to gain wealth and B now has more wealth than A, A starting to feel threatened because B now has more wealth than A. A is now no longer more superior than B in terms of wealth and feel threatened, A started to seek way to either gain more wealth than B or to reduce wealth of B to gain superiority. Such self imposed judgement will actually put more suffering to A.The ego can works very much from the perspective of B. Thinking that B has less wealth than A, B will seek out the way to gain more wealth than A or to reduce A's wealth. Such self imposed judgement will actually put more suffering to B.
Real world situation, on a global scale, can be observed on relationship between USA and China.
China was poor and backward, USA helped China to grow their economy, the objective back then was more to gravitate China away from Russia and Communism.
China started to grow their economy and now USA feel threatened because China could take over USA in terms of economy and starting to view China as it's ENEMY.Ego always works to ensure superiority and survival.
Peace Brother…
Thank you..Some may agree with you those who think in line with your thoughts … I have friends those who hold such views as you…. No harm… but I am not quite agreeing with many of the points above….
Superiority is not always bad… Superiority is a gift given by God… use it for benefit of others… Suppose if one is King, then he can’t behave like a peasant… King should act like King… Great example is Sulaiman and his life explanation in quran… Was he arrogant? Did he have Ego? Was he suppressing people? It may look so for some while reading his stories stated in the book.. But the author of the book claims he is a wonderful person in simple language.. that’s more than enough verdict…
Looking at the real gift of God to someone else and having to bother on that is ego… but with what God has gifted and acting on it in their own way is not ego dude…that’s perfect rejoicing the gift of God.. otherwise we have to consider Sulaiman to be an arrogant and ego oriented person…. No way…
In war or fight etc.. Simply if we show our power to the opposition to trick them and defeat them mentally, it is not ego… Ego should be understood very meticulously…. We may misunderstand looking at a person or what he speaks thinking he or she is ego slanted.. ..
Thinking that one is above another can never be part and parcel of ego… that’s far off from truth…. That’s the way people have to perceive matters… Knowing someone as poor with outer appearance and what he or she does is kind of personal judgment of others… not to tease them… but to know and to assist them if required…and perceive our position where God has kept us by having to be in such situation of low.. there we can thank God looking at them as well..
Suppose if one has very good athletic and strong body and another pale and skinny and if both meet and it is not the stronger to act he is superior … that’s ego… that’s waste of what he got as a physic to show off…. But if both happen to meet on a fight or war for better course and if he show off that’s not ego…
Remember brother …. same act of same nature may differ according to situations as Ego or Not…If America develop out of arrogance and jealousy of losing their superiority to china, then it is ego, but if the inner intention of America to maintain their stance and position by not losing to China then that’s not ego…That’s competition on a good course.. Anyhow everyone is in the process of learning … Sometimes certain type of ego can develop a person far better than what he was… for all we have to be positive and not harming anyone and not hurting anyone’s heart…that’s key,…..
….The way you express your views and presenting and posing questions are almost identical and reminds me of Imrnkwadja while I was having conversation long before with him….. are you brothers dude .. ? lol -
Superiority is not always bad… Superiority is a gift given by God…
Good and bad dependent on perspective, I never mentioned the word bad in any of my sentence above isn't it?
Ego is to be controlled, not to be judged, because judging itself is coming from ego.
Ego need to decide whether an event is good or bad from it's perspective and then take proper reaction to it. (to ensure superiority and survival).Thinking that one is above another can never be part and parcel of ego… that’s far off from truth….
It's coming from ego..
Remember brother …. same act of same nature may differ according to situations as Ego or Not…If America develop out of arrogance and jealousy of losing their superiority to china, then it is ego, but if the inner intention of America to maintain their stance and position by not losing to China then that’s not ego…That’s competition on a good course..
It's ego... and I didn't say it's either good or bad... it can be good it can be bad depending on the perspective and circumstances.
And such judgement is coming from ego as well.A thought experiment can be as if USA and China unite and form one identity. "China are among US" saith USA and "USA are among us" saith China. Thus no longer them but both USA and China refer to all of 'them' as us. (them here because let us took the perspective from the outside). Every success of "China" will be considered as our success by USA and vice versa.
As next level expand those step to all humanity, where all human will consider everyone as US.That's how it will evolve, even on individual level.
Ego can be controlled and managed, but not let ego take control and manage you.….The way you express your views and presenting and posing questions are almost identical and reminds me of Imrnkwadja while I was having conversation long before with him….. are you brothers dude .. ? lol
Maybe... we are brothers in soul... who knows?
Did we born from the same parent? well no..