The Ultimate Guide to Conquer Desires
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Peace fellow members,
If you'd like to read more books about the benefits of sexual abstinence/restraint, then please check the books below.
I heartily recommend these books
- Sexual Force or the Winged Dragon by Omraam Mikhaël Aïvanhov
- Self-Restraint vs Self-Indulgence by Mahatma Gandhi
- Climbing mount purgatorio by Shaykh Hamza Yusuf
- Sex and culture by J.D. Unwin
By the way, I'd like to share some information about the book "Sex and culture by J.D. Unwin" here. I don't agree with everything in the book. Nevertheless, I still think it's worth reading it. Because it contains some crucial historical information.
In Sex and Culture Unwin studied 80 primitive tribes and 6 known civilizations through 5,000 years of history and found a positive correlation between the cultural achievement of a people and the amount of sexual restraint which they observed. The author finds that the most culturally successful groups always exhibit lifelong monogamous relationships which include sexual abstinence outside of marriage. According to Unwin, after a nation becomes prosperous it becomes increasingly liberal with regard to sexual morality and as a result loses its cohesion, its impetus and its purpose, ultimately having a negative effect on society "The whole of human history does not contain a single instance of a group becoming civilized unless it has been absolutely monogamous, nor is there any example of a group retaining its culture after it has adopted less rigorous customs."
(Source http//www.artandpopularculture.com/J._D._Unwin)
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Peace jkhan,
Thank you for your reply.
In my studies of the Quran, I have found several verses which urge us to conquer desires (2543 and 7940-41). To put it in another way, there are several verses in the quran which urge us to keep desires. It seems that if desires are not kept in check, they can become excessive. Case in point Man A desires to eat chocholate. But he keeps his desires in check and only eats chocholate 1-2 times per week. Man B desires to eat chocholate. But he doesn't keep his desires in check and ends up eating chocholate 2-4 times every day. Both Man A and Man B desire to eat chocholate, but one of them keeps his desires in check, while the other one doesn't keep his desires in check. Thus, excessives desire are a reality. If you don't agree with regard to this, then let's agree to disagree.
By the way, please read the definition of the word "conquer" from Collins dictionary below.
conquer (ˈkɒŋkə )
verb
- to overcome (an enemy, army, etc); defeat
- to overcome (an obstacle, feeling, desire, etc); surmount
- (transitive)
to gain possession or control of by or as if by force or war; win - (transitive)
to gain the love, sympathy, etc, of (someone) by seduction or force of personality
(Source https//www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/conquer)
absolute repetition my dear... can't help unless you look at it how it deserve..
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One either conquers desires (keeps them under control), or the desires can end up becoming excessive. It's as simple as that.
That's what is called excess.. so the fault is not in desire but in excess... try to grasp pls... whatever
okay let me put it this way .. River is river as long it stays with its limit... it means be a river.. but when it goes beyond river bank then it is not a river, it is flood... so being a river is absolutely fine.. (DESIRE).... but breaking the edges / river bank and overflow won't help.. EXCESS / TRANSGRESS
But unto him who shall have stood in fear of his Sustainer's Presence, and held back his inner self from base desires, paradise will truly be the goal!
7940-41The word/term (l-hawā) in verse 79.40, is derived from the root Ha-Waw-Ya. Based on my knowledge of the quran, the word/term l-hawā means vain/base desires, not inclination.
If you claim that the word/term (l-hawā) in verse 7940 means inclination rather than base/vain desires, then please prove it.
Well ... i am patient with you, so i keep replying though i have replied in clarity..
okay let me clarify further...7937-41
So as for he who transgressed (Thagha)
And preferred(Athara) the life of the world,
Then indeed, Hellfire will be refuge
But as for he who feared the position of his Lord and prevented the soul from inclination (Hawa),
Then indeed, Paradise will be refugeread above verses which you have concern...note the word Thagha/Transgress.. then after transgress only one prefers the life of this world... preferring the life of this is no harm.. love what you do .. love what you live.. that's natural.. but don't transgress.. what transgress here? everything in life of this world.. Choosing Evil Path, Choosing Forbidden, Choosing Impossible etc etc.. and in the end relevant to this thread Choosing Excess...
Don't you like the life of this world? Of course i do but not the expense of the life hereafter.. How would you lose or end up in Hell fire? by transgressing and fall trap to life of this world in love...
So manifest..Opposite to this, who is successful? the one who fears the stand / position of God and prevent the soul from inclination ... inclination to what? inclination to what others transgressed and failed..
meaning / definition of INCLINATION "a person's natural tendency or urge to act or feel in a particular way; a disposition or propensity."
so MP... desire is just part of Inclination... so Hawa / Inclination and Yurid / (Wish/desire/intend)..
in some verses hawa may look to mean desire but if you look at it deeply it is inclination that propel them to desire...DESIRE Meaning "a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen."
huge difference between INCLINATOIN and DESIRE...
handshake -
Let me add two words that I forgot to add in one of the sentences in one of my previous posts in this thread. I will highlight the two words in bold in my previous post.
In my studies of the Quran, I have found several verses which urge us to conquer desires (2543 and 7940-41). To put it in another way, there are several verses in the quran which urge us to keep desires in check. It seems that if desires are not kept in check, they can become excessive. Case in point Man A desires to eat chocholate. But he keeps his desires in check and only eats chocholate 1-2 times per week. Man B desires to eat chocholate. But he doesn't keep his desires in check and ends up eating chocholate 2-4 times every day. Both Man A and Man B desire to eat chocholate, but one of them keeps his desires in check, while the other one doesn't keep his desires in check. Thus, excessives desire are a reality. If you don't agree with regard to this, then let's agree to disagree.
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Peace jkhan,
Thank you for your replies.
In my view, you haven't been able to prove that the word/term (l-hawā) in verse 7940 means inclination rather than base/vain desires.
Anyhow, I'm not going to get into a further semantic dispute about what the word/term hawa means. Nevertheless, I'm grateful for your meaningful and helpful/useful posts. I appreciate them.
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Peace fellow members,
There is a quote from a book that I want to share with you all. The book is called "Above life's Turmoil."
"As a man purifies his heart, temptation ceases, for when a certain unlawful desire has been taken out of the heart, the object which formerly appealed to it can no longer do so, but becomes dead and powerless, for there is nothing left in the heart that can respond to it. The honest man cannot be tempted to steal, let the occasion be ever so opportune; the man of purified appetites cannot be tempted to gluttony and drunkenness, though the viands and wines be the most luscious; he of an enlightened understanding, whose mind is calm in the strength of inward virtue, can never be tempted to anger, irritability or revenge, and the wiles and charms of the wanton fall upon the purified heart as empty meaningless shadows."
- James Allen
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Peace fellow members,
In this post, I'd like to share some verses from the quran about the keys to purity and self-control.
The keys to purity and self-control in the quran
- Muslim men who are devoted/faithful (sincere) servants of the creator won't succumb to desires such as lust (namely they have complete self-control). The devil has no authority/power over the devoted/faithful (sincere) servants of the creator. Thus, they won't succumb to lust and read/watch sexual materials such as erotic/pornographic videos, photographs, writings or the like. Additionally, they won't succumb to lust and masturbate. Further, they won't succumb to lust and have premarital sex, extramarital sex and/or extramarital physical/romantic relationships. (1223-24 and 153642).
- Muslim men are told to not commit shameful/immoral deeds, whether those deeds are plain/open/public or subtle/secret/private. (6151).
- Muslim men can prevent immoral/shameful deeds through the practice of Salat (adhering to and reading/studying the quran). (2945).
- Muslim men are told to not show their private parts to others with the exception of their wives and those who are maintained by their oaths. (235-6 and 7029-30).
- Muslim men are told to not look at nude women and pictures/videos of nude women, with the exception of their wives and those who are maintained by their oaths. Additionally, they are told to not look at women in a flirty or sexual way, with the exception of their wives. (235-6, 2430-31, 3335 and 7029-30).
- Muslim men are told to eat and drink moderatly. Thus, overeating, binge eating, gluttony (the over-indulgence or over-consumption of food and drink) are not in line with the quran. (6141 and 731).
- Muslim men who are unmarried are counselled to live in continence (practice sexual abstinence) until they have been granted sufficiency out of the creator's bounty. In other words, they are counselled to not have sex until they are married. (2433)
- Muslim men who are unmarried are counselled to not meet women they like secretly, unless they have something righteous to say to them. In other words, they are counselled to only meet women they like (as more than friends) secretly, if they have something righteous to say to them (namely to have righteous conversations). Thus, they are counselled to not secretely meet women they like (as more than friends) in order to engage in physical intimacy (holding hands, cuddling, kissing and so on). (2235).
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Peace The Middle Path, for me the thread would have clarity if you distinguished negative desires from positive desires.
For example The Ultimate Guide to Conquer (negative) Desires then I would immediately grasp the direction of the thread, but to link both positve and negative
together entails some mental gymnastics to easily comprehend. Just my two cents.God bless you
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Peace jkhan,
Thank you for your replies.
In my view, you haven't been able to prove that the word/term (l-hawā) in verse 7940 means inclination rather than base/vain desires.
Anyhow, I'm not going to get into a further semantic dispute about what the word/term hawa means. Nevertheless, I'm grateful for your meaningful and helpful/useful posts. I appreciate them.
Peace...
I am not here to prove you or anyone else.. Coz there is no judge in this forum for me to prove...
Readers have knowledge and they have their inclination and let their inclination be with Quran..Of course thank you for having a conversation and debate... Stick with Quran.. that's all what i have to say to you.. Hope you are doing that part...
May God guide us.. -
Salam all,
One verse that is related to the topic under discussion
"And I do not make myself free of blame, for the self is inclined to sin, except that which my Lord has mercy upon. My Lord is Forgiving, Merciful."
For those who are no longer inclined to sin, good news as that is a sign that God has mercy upon you! sun
Wassalam