Beyond Mere Abstinence of Food & Water
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Peace all.
As the end of this time of abstinence draws near, I was wondering how other people have experienced this year's Ramadan.
Fasting always seems to produce some interesting moments that go beyond the simple challenge of abstaining. I find that wonderful moments happen, if I'm open to them. Likewise, there are moments when I wonder if I'm doing what is acceptable to God...the quiet dark moments of contemplation that are necessary yet uncomfortable. Apparently, intense emotions (highs and lows) are part of the detoxification of the body.
Anyway, I thought this might be a good time to share a small thing that happened at the start of this year's Ramadan.
On my first day of fasting, I was at a small local store, where I ended up in line behind a woman who was telling the clerk behind the register about a special article of clothing she'd recently acquired. It seemed a rather odd thing, because the two women didn't seem to be friends.
Now...I'd already been by the store once, seen that it was cash-only, had to leave and run other errands, get cash from an ATM, then go back and pick up the few items I'd left with the clerk. It was very hot and humid that day, even in the early morning hours, and I was already running behind my planned schedule and mostly concerned with getting home and making sure I didn't get dehydrated. I wanted to make sure I wasn't distracted by thirst and that my attention was centered on God.
Problem was, I'd momentarily forgotten what that really means. So, at first, I was all too human--impatient and, I'm ashamed to admit, quick to pass judgment on the woman customer, who was making me wait while she talked about a simple scarf as if it were a monumental treasure. And it was something she wouldn't even be able to wear until winter.
Then I checked myself, feeling guilty for having such thoughts, and began to listen more closely. That simple scarf really meant something to the woman and she spoke of it with great pleasure but also with great humility and gratitude. She looked sheepishly over her shoulder at me at one point (fortunately I was smiling by that time), then she smiled and turned back to the clerk, added a couple of other quick comments about good things that had happened in general, and finished her story by saying, "So that's what God's been doing for me lately." In this area, even that is a bit unusual, since most people around here would say "Jesus" instead of "God." It definitely got my attention.
When the woman left the store, the clerk told me that the woman had been a frequent customer for close to a year--and sometimes she would talk and other times she wouldn't. Eventually, over a period of several months, even though she was quite shy, the woman had shared bits and pieces of her life with this one particular clerk, who was kind enough to share them with me.
Turns out, the woman has limited means. She and her husband mow lawns for people to make ends meet, and they have a son who has some sort of severe learning or mental disability. A few months ago, their old truck was stolen, making it difficult for them to get to work and to travel around to mow lawns. However, the clerk said the woman always managed to have a smile on her face. And somehow she and her husband were able to scrape together enough money to buy another truck, as well as the special scarf the woman was describing when I was behind her in line.
Had things gone the way I'd planned that morning (instead of the way God planned), or had I given into my initial impatience, I would have missed hearing the woman's story and the message that set the tone for my attitude about abstinence during Ramadan this year.
Perhaps I'm overly sentimental, but I thought this might be a good time to share the story with people here. Even if it meant admitting my own human weaknesses--that I could be so terribly impatient and judgmental...and all because of my hurry to "please God" by fasting. ops Clearly, I needed to learn, on the very first day, that I had much more to abstain from than mere food and water.
So...thanks and praise be to God for unexpected people-blessings and lessons.
And peace and blessings to everyone here.
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Peace Sytalls,
The poor but big-hearted lady!
And you are so good in describing details, ma sha Allah winkGod is pushing those people in our way to teach us lessons we need to learn at the right moment.
See the Ayat ,
The word in those Ayat means exactly "PUSH"! "If Allah does not push people against each other..."I see that as meaning against our wish, or when we least want it or expect it, but in it comes mercy..
Thanks for sharing the story with us.
Regards,
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Peace Sytalls,
Thanks for sharing your story. It was truly touching. I experienced something similar a few years ago, though not related to Ramadan...
I had just started working in the city and as the days passed, I was getting a feel for everyone. I started seeing the same faces and maintained a pleasant attitude, always saying hello with a smile. One gentleman, the maintenance person, never returned my hello. After a few weeks of my desperate efforts to get a return "hello" out of this guy, I finally asked a co-worker about him. I said, "What's up with that guy? He never says hello." My co-worker simply said, "Oh, he's an a-hole, don't let it get to you."
So, I stopped trying to say hello to him and would just ignore him on my way in and out of the office. A month or so later, I saw the guy in the lobby. It looked like he was talking to someone. As I got closer, I could just make out the sounds. The words were slurred and barely recongnizable, but I immediately recognized the significance. Turns out, he was deaf. I thought, "who's the a-hole now?"
I felt like such a jerk, first for not giving him the benefit of the doubt, and second, for letting someone else dictate how I should feel about a person. It was humbling to say the least.
Peace,
Tay -
Peace Taj and Tay. And thank you.
Oh, I just noticed, my sisters...you two are almost twins! In names, that is.
I like that idea, Taj, that God pushes people in our paths. Very interesting that "push" is the actual word used in 2251 and 2240. Wow, there are just so many levels to Quran. And it's wonderful to gain new perspective from someone like you who understands the nuances of the language. Thank you for that insight.
Thanks for your story, Tay. Nicely told! There was such a stab in my heart when you got to the part about the guy being deaf. Plus, I totally related to what you were saying, especially about letting someone else dictate the way you felt. Haven't most of us done that at one time or another? Yikes. It is such an easy trap to fall into.
May God help us all learn to turn off or tune out the evil little judging voice when people are pushed in front of us. yes
Peace & blessings. hug
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Tay is a girl? ??
Tay is a girl !!!!! that can't be true!!!! She fooled me for that long with Tay being name of the legendary hostpitable Arab!!!! -)
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Maybe somebody had better tell me about this legendary Arab.
Name Hatim Tai
Period c570 -
Biographical detail A famous Arabian chief, known for his generosity, wisdom and courage.Hatim Tai was the King of the Tai tribe who lived in Najd province in the central part of the Arabian Peninsula. His legendary hospitality acquired fame as a great hero of Arabia and a veritable symbol of selflessness, charity and generosity.
Legendary Person was Hatim Tai. I assume our "Tay" is the same Tay spelt with a "y" instead of "i". And judging from the content of his posts I would say he too has the same generosity of spirit, wisdom and courage
as the legendary Hatim Tai! -)Regards,
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Thanks for the info, LT. D I have heard of "Hatim"...but only the first name and something about being generous. And that was about the extent of knowledge there.
About your assessment of Tay...
And judging from the content of his posts I would say he too has the same generosity of spirit, wisdom and courage
as the legendary Hatim Tai!I agree! )
Uh, hmmm. sniff On second thought, maybe I should refrain from judging of any kind. ?
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Peace All,
Sorry for letting this post slip through the cracks.
Zenje stated
Tay is a girl? ??
rotfl I pee standing up
Sytalls stated
Sorry, Tay.
No problemo
LoteTree stated
And judging from the content of his posts I would say he too has the same generosity of spirit, wisdom and courage
as the legendary Hatim Tai!Thank you kindly for the generous words. I am truly humbled.
Natu stated
What did you say to that co-worker then? evil
I promptly told him that the guy was deaf. My co-worker was actually a cool guy - just a little rough around the edges.
Peace,
Tay