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  4. sex before marriage

sex before marriage

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  • S Offline
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    sayeeth
    wrote on last edited by
    #167

    Peace be upon you AhmedBahgat,

    Peace to all
    the Shabakah is a gift to the pride

    The Mahr is given to the pride family to help in building the new house for the two, i.e. the Mahr paid by the Husband is just a share in the cost of building the house "furniture etc, etc", the family of the woman MUST also pay their share to prepare the house, it works roughly like 50%, 50%, but whoeever have money should pay more for sure

    Just a minor correction done for you. It's bride. Gift to the pride and pride family just sounded wrong. Apologies for nit-picking. Communication is a powerful tool. We don't want people who are linguistically declined in English to get the wrong idea.

    prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race at least, the prostitute can transfer diseases to many men on one day or one of the customers transfer it to the prostitute then the prostitute transfer it to many men and it will keep going

    prostitution also destroys families including children

    a male or a female prostitute are definitly bound to hell unless they repent

    peace to all

    If prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race, then why is it theoretically one of the oldest known professions? The human race sure seems well protected with prostitution in its place. As far as I know, even safe sex is encouraged at brothels. Prostitutes are even sent for checkups, courtesy of their pimps. Sort of like, they want to keep their goods in good condition until wear and tear occurs. So theoretically again, prosititution is "safer", well at least here in Singapore. As much as we may want to protect the human race from such adversities, we cannot stop them from going on. The more we protect, the more another will overcome the protection. The more we forbid it, the more the sexually deprave human will want it. That is what actually will keep going. On our end, just educate the people we know about such things and hope they don't go get jiggy with those prostitutes. If they choose to, then too bad. Just safeguard ourselves. I suppose that will suffice. Feel free to share your views. Cheers.

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      unknownuser
      wrote on last edited by
      #168

      Peace to all

      Here is a verse from the Quran that will prove beyond doubt that Zani or Zania also covers the single people

      ?Let no man guilty of adultery or fornication marry and but a woman similarly guilty, or an Unbeliever nor let any but such a man or an Unbeliever marry such a woman to the Believers such a thing is forbidden.?

      (3)

      -> Can you figure it out from the above?, let me explain, it is really simple

      -> Allah is telling us that the Zani DOES NOT MARRY BUT A ZANIA LIKE HIM OR A MUSHRIKA and the Zania DOES NOT MARRY BUT A ZANI LIKE HER OR A MUSHRIK

      I.E. the Quran described single humans as being Zani or Zania

      I reckon the above verse should refute that argument for good

      Peace to all

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        sayeeth
        wrote on last edited by
        #169

        Salaam Sayeeth,

        You have a very wise and sound way of expalining things )

        Peace be upon you Sister Majidah,

        I am still very young and far from being wise and sound. However, thank you for your encouraging words. Cheers.

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          unknownuser
          wrote on last edited by
          #170

          Peace be upon you AhmedBahgat,

          Peace to all
          the Shabakah is a gift to the pride

          The Mahr is given to the pride family to help in building the new house for the two, i.e. the Mahr paid by the Husband is just a share in the cost of building the house "furniture etc, etc", the family of the woman MUST also pay their share to prepare the house, it works roughly like 50%, 50%, but whoeever have money should pay more for sure

          Just a minor correction done for you. It's bride. Gift to the pride and pride family just sounded wrong. Apologies for nit-picking. Communication is a powerful tool. We don't want people who are linguistically declined in English to get the wrong idea.

          thank you bro, no apologies required, I actually suffer from a spelling disorder big times, I lived a couple of years in the states before I moved to australia 15 years ago, hence I have 17 years experience talking english, but typing was far less lol

          prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race at least, the prostitute can transfer diseases to many men on one day or one of the customers transfer it to the prostitute then the prostitute transfer it to many men and it will keep going

          prostitution also destroys families including children

          a male or a female prostitute are definitly bound to hell unless they repent

          peace to all

          If prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race, then why is it theoretically one of the oldest known professions?

          I believe for two main reasons

          1. Sex is one of the biggest Fitna "Test" Allah has forced unto us
          2. Humans don't abide by Allah's laws

          The human race sure seems well protected with prostitution in its place.

          I don't mean extinction rather living this life while suffering from a huge list of STDs, sure the human race has weaken, I'm sure they used to live longer in the past

          As far as I know, even safe sex is encouraged at brothels. Prostitutes are even sent for checkups, courtesy of their pimps.

          sure, Satan is doing a great job, he makes prostitution look great for many humans, have you ever watched Jerry Springer

          Jerry, Jerry, Jerry lol

          Sort of like, they want to keep their goods in good condition until wear and tear occurs. So theoretically again, prosititution is "safer", well at least here in Singapore.

          well, then I will just take it as an order from my God and I have to abide by it, like the pig meat, you know it tastes good and seems no harm in it but Allah has prohibited it so I have to abide by it, you see this life is nothing but a TEST

          As much as we may want to protect the human race from such adversities, we cannot stop them from going on. The more we protect, the more another will overcome the protection. The more we forbid it, the more the sexually deprave human will want it. That is what actually will keep going. On our end, just educate the people we know about such things and hope they don't go get jiggy with those prostitutes. If they choose to, then too bad. Just safeguard ourselves. I suppose that will suffice. Feel free to share your views. Cheers.

          true, but the point is we are living a test, and this is a very serious context, especially if the Examiner is a very powerful entity that most of us if not all can not comprehend Its Might

          Peace bro and please feel free to fix my spelling lol

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            Elke
            wrote on last edited by
            #171

            Salam all,

            peacefulmuslim, where did you get your percentages from ? lol

            They sound right though...

            LK

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              unknownuser
              wrote on last edited by
              #172

              Hello,

              My marriage was arranged, after 10 days of seeing each other for the first time me and my wife fully married, now we live together for 15 years, we have a beautiful 14 years old girl (Sara) and 18 months old boy (Noor El Deen) and we love each other to death, I really prefer arranged marriage, but i have to say success rate is not that high, we were just lucky that we are compatible

              peace

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                Elke
                wrote on last edited by
                #173

                Peace Ahmed,

                You really prefer arranged marriages ? You recognize yourself that you were lucky!

                I think though that there might be one positive point to arranged (not forced) marriages Romantic expectations don't run to high and as such wont be shattered...

                LK

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                  unknownuser
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #174

                  Peace Ahmed,

                  Peace Elke

                  You really prefer arranged marriages ?

                  Possibly I?m influenced with my own successful experience

                  You recognize yourself that you were lucky!

                  I honestly don?t believe in luck, I just said it in a common way, the general rule for matching the couples were mentioned in the Quran

                  ?Vile women are for vile men, and vile men for vile women. Good women are for good men, and good men for good women; such are innocent of that which people say For them is pardon and a bountiful provision.?

                  (26)

                  -> The above verse was sort of assurance to me that if I?m good then most likely my wife will be a good person, if I?m bad then I would expect my wife to be a bad person, but for every rule there is exceptions for sure

                  I think though that there might be one positive point to arranged (not forced) marriages Romantic expectations don't run to high and as such wont be shattered...

                  There was no forcing whatsoever in my case, it was my choice and hers

                  Peace

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                    unknownuser
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #175

                    hi Elke,

                    peacefulmuslim, where did you get your percentages from ? lol
                    They sound right though...

                    I made up those percentages based on what I have seen around me. And trust me, I have seen loads coz in the society I come from ' arranged marriage is the only norm' among all generations. u get a clear picture when u live with the couple under the same roof.

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                      unknownuser
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #176

                      hI Ahmed,

                      Possibly I?m influenced with my own successful experience

                      yeah, u r right. I have seen some couples who have an arranged marriage and discover that their partner is the ideal one for them. But this happens only in less than 5% of the cases.

                      You recognize yourself that you were lucky!

                      I honestly don?t believe in luck, I just said it in a common way, the general rule for matching the couples were mentioned in the Quran
                      The verse was sort of assurance to me that if I?m good then most likely my wife will be a good person, if I?m bad then I would expect my wife to be a bad person, but for every rule there is exceptions for sure.

                      I cant agree on that one coz I have seen loads of wonderful people stuck with incompatible partners and in miserable marriages.
                      U have been lucky, indeed.
                      Allah also tells us to choose our partner based on virtue, Doesnt He? I dont remember the verse but I have read it. so, that would imply Allah tells us to choose our partner.
                      And arranged marriage is a huge gamble. u r one of the very few lucky ones!

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                        newwizard3253
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #177

                        Arranged marriages are a source for unhappiness and injustice in a person's life. If you're going to commit to one person for the rest of your life (ideally) it better be one you actually love and that loves you back.

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                          stillearning
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #178

                          Salaam PM

                          I have seen some couples who have an arranged marriage and discover that their partner is the ideal one for them. But this happens only in less than 5% of the cases.

                          Wow! and over 90% of arrranged married couples are living an unhappy existance. Where has this 5% come from.
                          Salaam

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                            unknownuser
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #179

                            SaLaM stillearning
                            Loooll its a joke. I guess it sounds better when said instead of written. But i tried.

                            Its hard to make some people laugh Jaxal wink

                            Arranged marriages hold because there is a social stigma attached to divorce in these societies...even though those marriages are terrible.

                            Regards,

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                              Jaxal
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #180

                              SaLaM LT

                              especially in 3rd world countries like pakistan, india, bangla, malay, ... etc. They rather lead a miserable life than divorce.

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                                unknownuser
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #181

                                Hi stillearning,

                                Wow! and over 90% of arrranged married couples are living an unhappy existance. Where has this 5% come from.

                                Yeah, only in less than 5% cases, the partners discover that they are ideal for each other. Well, not all of the others live in misery. Some just try to get along,by working hard on the marriage. And some live in misery.

                                Like I said, the odds that u will find the ideal partner in an arranged marriage, is only as good as marrying the first person u see on the street today.

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                                  stillearning
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #182

                                  salaam PM

                                  Like I said, the odds that u will find the ideal partner in an arranged marriage, is only as good as marrying the first person u see on the street today.

                                  An ideal partner! I suppose that is why so many divorces in so called love marriages(before jaxal asks me what love is) I suppose it is search for the ideal partner!

                                  salaam jaxal

                                  especially in 3rd world countries like pakistan, india, bangla, malay, ... etc. They rather lead a miserable life than divorce.

                                  very judgemental here. I suppose divorce must be some form of happiness!

                                  salaam LT

                                  Its hard to make some people laugh Jaxal

                                  I yes I do laugh first thing in the morning it gets it over and done with for the rest of the day.

                                  Arranged marriages hold because there is a social stigma attached to divorce in these societies...even though those marriages are terrible

                                  Please everyone what is with you guys is this a competetion for who can come up with most cliches and stereotypes.
                                  It might be that people like each other, and their kids, work on their marrages and that is why they hold.

                                  One suggestion by those bamboozled by so called love marriages(sorry jaxal point taken) why not spend a day in the family division of any court>

                                  regards

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                                    unknownuser
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #183

                                    Hi Stillearning,
                                    let me rephrase it, coz this is very true as well.
                                    The odds that u find a compatible partner in an arranged marriage, is only as good as marrying the first person u see on the street today.

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                                      Jaxal
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #184

                                      SaLaM stillearning

                                      Not being judgemental. Its the truth. They rather stay in their miserable marriage than get a divorce becoz those who get divorce in those countries are looked down upon. Especially women. Society labels them as 'defected' equipment. There is a reason those countries are called 3rd world.

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                                        phoenix1
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #185

                                        wait. can i just ask where these percentages are coming from? about arranged marriages being unhappy. just wanna know.

                                        And Jaxal, here's what "3rd world" really means. And i dont think Malaysia is a poor country. is it?

                                        The term "Third World" was coined by economist Alfred Sauvy in an article in the French magazine L'Observateur of August 14, 1952. It was a deliberate reference to the "Third Estate" of the French Revolution. Tiers monde means Third World in French, but in the sense of "one-third" -- it does not mean "third in rank" (which would be troisi?me monde). The term gained widespread popularity during the Cold War when many poorer nations adopted the category to describe themselves as neither being aligned with NATO or the Warsaw Pact, but instead composing a non-aligned "third world" (in this context, the term "First World" was generally understood to mean the United States and its allies in the Cold War, which would have made the East bloc the "Second World" by default; however, the latter term was very seldom actually used).

                                        from wikipedia.org
                                        http//en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_world

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                                          TAJ
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #186

                                          Hi Sis PM,

                                          Are you a social worker?

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