Polygamy - To Mothers of Orphans Only
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Peace,
I understand there is something like this on the free-minds page. Im just putting this as there maybe new/different points in this article which are not in the other one for everyones benefit. ) Note "Allah" is used and not "God" for the interest of target readers (who use "Allah" more often).
Polygamy - To Mothers of Orphans Only
No where in the Qur'an is it allowed to marry more than one wife for personal satisfaction. The verse regarding polygamy is set in the clear context of taking care of orphaned children. It specifies the only reasoning behind marriage to more than one woman
Surah 4 - An-Nisa (Women), Verses 1 to 4
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People, be mindful of your Lord, who created you from a single soul, and from it created its mate and from the pair of them spread countless men and women. Be mindful of Allah, in whose name you ask one another of what is in the womb, Allah is always watching over you. (41). . ,
Give orphans their property, do not replace their good things with the bad, and do not consume their property with your own. That is a serious crime. (42). .
If you fear that you will not be just/equitable to the orphans, then marry as permissible for you, women, two, three or four. But if you fear you will not be equitable, then one or to whom you are committed to by oath. That is better so that you do not deviate from the right course. (43)Firstly, the verse of 'polygamy' is clearly embedded within the context of taking care of orphans. Where 43 is the 'verse of polygamy', the issue of orphaned children starts from 42.
Secondly, reading 43, we notice the verse begins by laying a clear condition, "If you fear that you will not be just/equitable to the orphans, then marry...". The underlined word "then" is the translation for the word "fa / ". This term used to mean "in that case / so / then" is connecting the two portion of marrying more than one woman, and being more equitable to orphans, in a conditional manner. Even to an un-trained reader, it is very obvious to notice that Allah is stating here that the verse is 'permitting' another marriage only in order to be more "just / equitable" to orphaned children, in other words, to take care of orphaned children better. Orphaned children who have lost their father need care when their widowed mother is unable to provide for them. How can marrying again solve the problem of helpless orphaned children who are not provided for (e.g. food and shelter)? Ofcourse, it is by marriage to the widowed mother to whom the orphans belong to - who is also is in need of provision.
The discussion of orphans and their care continues well into Surah An-Nisa further emphasising that marriage to more than one woman is only permitted in the unique case stated very explicitly within the verse itself. The next few verses following the 'verse of polygamy' 43, are shown below for readers information
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And give women their property willingly, and if they remit any of it to you of their own will, then you may take it with a clear conscience (non-literal). (45)And do not give the immature ones their money which Allah has entrusted to you, and spend on them from it and clothe them, and speak to them in goodness. (46)
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Test orphans until they reach marriageable age; then if you find they have sound judgement, hand over their property to them. Do not consume it hastily before they come of age. If the guardian is well off, he should abstain from the orphan's property, and if he is poor he should use only what is fair. When you give them their property, call witnesses in, but Allah takes full account of everything you do. (47)And the Qur'an continues to address the orphans care and protection. It is striking just how much Allah emphasises on the protection of such children.
Believing men marry only once by default
From Quranic point, believing men should marry only once as normal practice. We know this due to a few reasons. One of them is that Allah states
"Marry those who are single among you including the righteous ones from your male and female servants" (Qur'an 2432)
Polygamy involves marriage to a man who is not single. Also, marriage is generally encouraged in the Qur'an. Marrying once in the 'normal manner' fulfils this, as in 2432 - yet what is in 43, is stated in exceptional terms in terms of orphaned children's care.
Also notice that in 43, Allah has explicitly stated that believing men should only be married to one woman in the circumstance shown, and it is better this way
"...then marry as permissible, women, two, three or four . But if you fear you will not be equitable, then one. That is better so that you do not deviate from the right course" (43)
Thus, a single marriage is the norm. Marriage to a widow in the interest of caring for orphans is the exception the verse is making.
Understanding of "if you fear you will not be equitable/just, then one / "
The verse reads " / if you fear you will not be equitable/just, then one". Thus, a stipulation clearly laid in the verse, is the issue of equitability and fairness between existing wife and subsequent marriage to mothers of orphans. We need to pay special attention here due to what many traditionalists have claimed in their literature. Since traditionalists' motive is to establish that men can marry any women up to four for personal desire / satisfaction, they try to impose a very shallow and biased understanding of what constitutes 'fair / equitable' in the verse. They claim that as long as a man can provide food, housing, clothing (i.e. material provisions) to equal amounts to all wives, he is being equitable and just. They say in that case he is meeting the requirement of the verse and can marry more than once up to four. Thus they have passed "fatwas" (verdicts) where they state that "permission" is not necessary from first wife for the husband to marry more wives (to any women). In other words, even against the first wife's happiness, the husband can marry again. Many such traditional so called Muslims have done just that and bought depression upon their first wife.
This is an understanding lacking wisdom and knowledge. Because to be 'just' and 'equitable' is not only about providing material provision, it is also about being just to someone emotionally. If we take two people and emotionally torture one, then that is unjust - to consider simply providing material provision to equal level to be part of equality is pure ignorance - it is also about what you are doing to someone on the inside.
Thus, if the first wife is against the idea of her husband marrying a second time (even to take care of orphaned children, to a widow), then her wish must be respected to comply with the verse (the section "if you fear you will not be equitable/just, then one". If the husband marries against her wishes, then he is emotionally harming her (and is being 'unjust'. Supposing the second wife-to-be is happy with the man's second marriage while his existing wife is angry and upset, then this is not being 'just' or 'equitable' between the two since one will be made happy and the other angry and upset.
Such shallow and thoughtless derivation of Quranic verses by these traditionalists portray a worrying element in their own marital relationships - since we see that consideration of human beings' emotions, the wife's feelings or thoughts are completely overlooked and neglected, and an emotionless interpretation is spread. The reasoning for this is as stated, their preconceived motive of justifying marrying more women for personal or sexual gratification. Ideas of women's role as an obedient sexual tool for 'hyper-sexual' men is spread widely through extra-Quranic sources in the name of true religion, and is not based on the Quranic religion. In the Qur'an, the relationship between husband and wife is stated in following terms
"One of His signs is that He created for you spouses like your selves so that you may live with them with affection and mercy - there are signs in this for people who reflect". (Qur'an 3021)
Understanding of "...then marry as permissible for you / "
Allah has prohibited marriage between close relative members
"And do not marry whom your fathers had married, except what has already been done. It is a lewdness, and an abhorrence, and a evil way. Forbidden for you are your mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and the sisters of your father, and the sisters of your mother, and the daughters of your brother, and the daughters of your sister, and your foster mothers who suckled you, and your sisters from suckling, and the mother-in-laws, and your step-daughters who are in your lodgings from your women with whom you have already consummated marriage; if you have not consummated the marriage then there is no sin upon you; and those who were married to your genetic sons. Also (forbidden) that you have two sisters together, except what has already been done. Allah is Forgiving, Merciful." (Qur'an 423)
So when Allah says in 43
"If you fear that you will not be just/equitable to the orphans, then marry as permissible for you ( م, women, two, three or four." (44)
"Marry as permissible for you / " is referring to restrictions laid to whom marriage is permissible. These restrictions still apply, even in the case of a widowed woman in need of provision for her children. It may be that a believing men cannot marry a widow or does not want to for whatever reason. it is important to bear in mind as believers, that it is not necessary to marry a widowed women to be charitable and kind to her. Through out the Qur'an, being charitable and looking after the needy and especially fellow believers have been shown as a clear attribute of those who love Allah and follow the Qur'an.
Most so-called Muslims simply do not look at the Qur'an and simply accept what they hear or read in textbooks about the Qur'an. By studying the actual verses, we have noticed striking points, which have been deliberately hidden away from Muslims by the clergy.
Deceptive Methods Used
The traditionalist preachers of this verse use many tactics in an attempt to establish their desired interpretation, that is that men can marry any women up to four wives. Some of the common tactics are as follows
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In a translation, inserting the word "other" in a bracket so that the verse reads "marry (other) women", in order to disconnect the condition stated in the actual Arabic Qur'an. The word "other" is ofcourse, not in the actual Qur'an (rather the contrary "fa " is used to link the two together, "If you fear that you will not be just/equitable to the orphans, then ("fa " marry as permissible for you", women, two, three or four."
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In speeches and sermons, they deliberately omit the first half of the verse, which stipulates the condition. They begin quoting the verse from "marry as permissible, women, two, three or four" after telling the audience that men can marry four wives, any women (not widows), for any reason.
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And general 'brainwashing' of Muslims into thinking that the Qur'an can only be understood / interpreted by special scholars - they shall not question what they read, and the majority is correct.
In conclusion, we have deduced the following from the Qur'an
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Marriage to more than one woman is not for personal or sexual gratification at all. It is permitted only to mothers of orphans in the interest of taking care of orphaned children, who otherwise, would not have basic provisions such as food, shelter etc.
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Even if it is in the interest of taking care of orphaned children, the first wife's happiness and opinion takes priority and the believing husband will not marry the widowed woman.
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Though only mothers of orphans who are in need of care and protection is allowed, "Marry as permissible for you / " is referring to only those such widowed women who are permissible for marriage.
There have been many men in modern days who, in the name of being a "Muslim", marry against their first wives wishes and there are first wives who are depressed due to inconsiderate nature of the husband who married against her will. These men are in violation of all the teachings of the Qur'an described in this article. Not only did they marry against their first wives will, the women they married are not widows with young children. Their intention was purely for self-satisfaction.
True believing men abide fully by the sublime morals of the Qur'an. In cases where the actual Qur'an is followed thoroughly, without deviated teachings that go contrary to Quranic teachings, all believers on this path lead a peaceful and content lives.
"But when the righteous are asked, 'What has your Lord sent down?' They say, 'all that is good'. There is good in the world for those who do good, and the abode of the Hereafter is even better. How excellent is the home of the righteous!" (Qur'an 1630)
QuranicPath | Polygamy - To Mothers of Orphans Only
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Salaams Ace,
Of course i may be wrong, but this makes more of a sense.
See the quranic dictionary by OMAR. Ayama denotes unmarried men and women- single or widowed or divorced(p39)
The Ta is used to denote the feminine(p72)
004.001
O mankind! reverence your Guardian-Lord, who created you from a single person, created, of like nature, His mate, and from them twain scattered (like seeds) countless men and women;- reverence Allah, through whom ye demand your mutual (rights), and (reverence) the wombs (That bore you) for Allah ever watches over you.
004.002
To females without a support restore their property , nor substitute worthless things for good ones; and devour not their substance with your own. For this is indeed a great sin.
004.003
If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal rightously with the females without a support, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one???
004.004
And give the women (on marriage) their dower as a free gift; but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, Take it and enjoy it with right good cheer.
004.005
To those weak of understanding Make not over your property, which Allah hath made a means of support for you, but feed and clothe them therewith, and speak to them words of kindness and justice.
004.006
Make trial of the females without a support until they reach to marriage; if then ye find sound judgment in them, release their property to them; but consume it not wastefully, nor in haste against their growing up. If the guardian is well-off, Let him claim no remuneration, but if he is poor, let him have for himself what is just and reasonable. When ye release their property to them, take witnesses in their presence But all-sufficient is Allah in taking account.
004.007
YUSUFALI From what is left by parents and those nearest related there is a share for men and a share for women, whether the property be small or large,-a determinate share.
004.008
YUSUFALI But if at the time of division other relatives, or orphans or poor, are present, feed them out of the (property), and speak to them words of kindness and justice.
004.009
Let those (disposing of an estate) have the same fear in their minds as they would have for their own if they had left a helpless family behind Let them fear Allah, and speak words of appropriate (comfort).
004.010
Those who unjustly eat up the property of women without a support, eat up a Fire into their own bodies They will soon be enduring a Blazing Fire!
004.011
Allah (thus) directs you as regards your Children's (Inheritance) to the male, a portion equal to that of two females if only daughters, two or more, their share is two-thirds of the inheritance; if only one, her share is a half. For parents, a sixth share of the inheritance to each, if the deceased left children; if no children, and the parents are the (only) heirs, the mother has a third; if the deceased Left brothers (or sisters) the mother has a sixth. (The distribution in all cases ('s) after the payment of legacies and debts. Ye know not whether your parents or your children are nearest to you in benefit. These are settled portions ordained by Allah; and Allah is All-knowing, Al-wise.
004.012
In what your wives leave, your share is a half, if they leave no child; but if they leave a child, ye get a fourth; after payment of legacies and debts. In what ye leave, their share is a fourth, if ye leave no child; but if ye leave a child, they get an eighth; after payment of legacies and debts. If the man or woman whose inheritance is in question, has left neither ascendants nor descendants, but has left a brother or a sister, each one of the two gets a sixth; but if more than two, they share in a third; after payment of legacies and debts; so that no loss is caused (to any one). Thus is it ordained by Allah; and Allah is All-knowing, Most Forbearing.For Al-Ayama, used in 2432; it is a plural for men and for women whose partners have died- I think.
http//www.studyquran.org/LaneLexicon/Volume1/00000175.pdf
2432
Marry those among you whose partners have died and the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female if they are in poverty, Allah will give them means out of His grace for Allah encompasseth all, and he knoweth all things.God Bless.
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Polygamy existed long before the Quran so its not quite right to say the Quran legalized it or limited its usage. The Quran never said maximum four in fact it seems the Quran never comented regarding polygamy. The two, three and four is not neccesarily meaning upto 4 as the Quran tells us one angel visisted Mary but in another verse tells us more than one came. It never said only one angel came. Also the Quran says we should establish prayers t the two ends of the day and the approaches of the night, howevere many believe 5 is the amount of prayer per day. Also the Quran says recitating the Quran at dawn. However we do not consider that obligatory.
There is no reason to believe that the Quran changed anything regarding polygamy but it did focus on ethical issues regarding marriage and family life. Polygamy existed long before the Quran and the verse in the Quran was aimed at orphans and not polygamy. The Quran could be easily saying if you can not marry orphans or think you will not be fair with them than marry the usual marriages you do like one, two three or four wives.
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Polygamy existed long before the Quran so its not quite right to say the Quran legalized it or limited its usage. The Quran never said maximum four in fact it seems the Quran never comented regarding polygamy. The two, three and four is not neccesarily meaning upto 4 as the Quran tells us one angel visisted Mary but in another verse tells us more than one came. It never said only one angel came. Also the Quran says we should establish prayers t the two ends of the day and the approaches of the night, howevere many believe 5 is the amount of prayer per day. Also the Quran says recitating the Quran at dawn. However we do not consider that obligatory.
you are right, the way it is mentioned doesn't neccessarily mean it limits it to 4.
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Peace,
respectfully.If you look carefully, you'll notice that wahabis are marrying four women, not necessarily widows and they do it only to have more kids because they want to outnumber the other tribe - nonpagans, Christians, Jews, atheists, Muslims.
1692 And do not be like she who unraveled her knitting after it had become strong, by breaking your oaths as a means of deception between you. That a nation shall be more numerous than another nation, for God puts you to the test by it. And He will show you on the Day of Resurrection that which you were disputing in.
Peace.
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Polygamy existed long before the Quran so its not quite right to say the Quran legalized it or limited its usage.
Marrying two sisters also existed long before the quraan, so what's your point? If everything existed before the quraan is to stay, what's the point of the quraan?
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This
mathna wa thulaatha wa rubaa3...
Is not supposed to mean two at a time, three at a time, or four at a time?
The whole aya seems to point to a spot situation which the gurdians of the orphans may be going through in which they might be tempted to behave dishonourably. The address is to the community. It is not addressing a single person and not specifically a male.
I mut say that for years and years I have admitted without problem that polygamy was admissible for a good cause, and I still think it is admissible for a good cause, but the more I look at it, the less this aya looks to me as a permission for polygamy or even that it connotes or concerns polygamy at all. I do not think it has anything to do with it, either to allow it or disallow it. If polygamy is contemplated, it is not in this aya.
If we add to it the other primary meaning of "nisaa'" (the left behind) it is not even to be understood that those to be married must be women. It may be the disadvantaged ones in the wider sense, females or males, and nowhere it is explicited that the guardians are all males. Actually women were also guardians.
Salaam
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Marrying two sisters also existed long before the quraan, so what's your point? If everything existed before the quraan is to stay, what's the point of the quraan?
To confirm, 241 for example.
If we add to it the other primary meaning of "nisaa'" (the left behind) it is not even to be understood that those to be married must be women. It may be the disadvantaged ones in the wider sense, females or males, and nowhere it is explicited that the guardians are all males. Actually women were also guardians.
Salaam
Or leaders , like the Queen Saba in chapter 27.
As for polygamy itself, let's analyze 43, shall we
"And if you fear that you cannot be just to the orphans, then marry off those whom you see fit of the women by two's and three's and four's. But if you fear taAAdiloo/not be fair, then only one, or those who are your dependants. This is best that you do not face poverty." -43
How is taAAdiloo defined in 4129 ?
And you will not be able to be fair/taAAdiloo regarding the women even if you make every effort; so do not sway too greatly and leave her as one hanging in a void. And if you reconcile and do right, then God is Forgiving, Merciful.
This is why cross-referencing is so vital. As, 43 in itself can be misleading.
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Marrying two sisters also existed long before the quraan, so what's your point? If everything existed before the quraan is to stay, what's the point of the quraan?
The point is, marry as long as they are not two sisters.
Is there a problem with what is allowed?
http//free-minds.org/quran/PM/4/23
Progressive Muslims 423 Forbidden for you are your mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and the sisters of your father, and the sisters of your mother, and the daughters of your brother, and the daughters of your sister, and your foster mothers who suckled you, and your sisters from suckling, and the mothers of your women, and your step-daughters who are in your lodgings from your women with whom you have already consummated the marriage; if you have not consummated the marriage then there is no sin upon you; and those who were in wedlock with your sons who are from your seed, and that you join between two sisters except what has already been done. God is Forgiving, Merciful.
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Bigmo, can you kindly post the references on the verses you mention (regarding Mary).
"And mention in the Book, Maryam when she withdrew from her family to a place facing east. She placed a screen from them; then We sent to her our angel and he appeared before her in the form of a man in full human form. She said 'I seek refuge with The Most Beneficent from you, if you do fear Him.' (The angel) said 'I am only a Messenger from your Lord, (to announce) to you the gift of a righteous son.' She said 'How can I have a son, when no man has touched me, nor am I unchaste?' He (the angel) said 'So (it will be), your Lord said 'That is easy for Me And to appoint him as a sign to mankind and a mercy from Us (from God)', and it is a matter (already) decreed (by God).' " (Quran 1916-21)
Yet it also says
3.44. This is part of the tidings of the things unseen, which We reveal unto thee (O Messenger.) by inspiration Thou wast not with them when they cast lots with arrows, as to which of them should be charged with the care of Mary Nor wast thou with them when they disputed (the point).
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Behold! the angels said "O Mary! Allah giveth thee glad tidings of a Word from Him his name will be Christ Jesus, the son of Mary, held in honour in this world and the Hereafter and of (the company of) those nearest to Allah.
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"He shall speak to the people in childhood and in maturity. And he shall be (of the company) of the righteous."
So numbers are not as significant as they appear. By looking at the verses in chapter !( we would assume that one angel visited Mary and talked to her and gave her the news of a son. However we see there were also other angels involved. The Quran never said only one angel visited. So we should not asume by saying two, three or four, its stating no more than four. The Quran says we should not have other gods and we should not lie or cheat or steal or kill or act trecherous or be dishonest and treat our wives discrimintory or commit adultery or slander others and backbite and be miserly. It however never said we should not marry more than four.
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