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  4. Wife beating in islam? The Quran strikes back

Wife beating in islam? The Quran strikes back

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Questions/Comments on the Quran
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  • H Offline
    H Offline
    hawk99
    wrote on last edited by
    #233

    Peace Wakas,

    Separate, not divorce within the household or going to a relatives or friends house for time to think,
    cool off or give space is definitive and understandable how to be done by most. Like "leave"is understood by most
    people. But "beat" is much more vague with no parameters, also their are problems carrying out such a directive
    like beat because severe injury may occur to one or both of the parties. How is the beating to be carried out?

    God bless

    peace

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    • WakasW Offline
      WakasW Offline
      Wakas
      wrote on last edited by
      #234

      peace hawk99,

      Separate, not divorce within the household or going to a relatives or friends house for time to think,
      cool off or give space is definitive and understandable how to be done by most. Like "leave"is understood by most
      people.

      I agree that it can't mean "divorce", however I disagree that it is "definitive and understandable" as I mention here. Feel free to show several people the verse with "leave them" or "separate from them" in the verse and see if they all give the same answer in terms of what it means. This might give one a good indication if it is "definitive and understandable". Let us know what you find.

      But "beat" is much more vague with no parameters, also their are problems carrying out such a directive
      like beat because severe injury may occur to one or both of the parties. How is the beating to be carried out?

      I agree, but I'm not sure why you're asking me. This specific issue is discussed at length on Quran434.com

      All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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      • A Offline
        A Offline
        aqua
        wrote on last edited by
        #235

        As I have often said, this is all about weighing up the options. If you or anyone else can produce a evidenced/logical alternative option, feel free. Thus far, I haven't seen anyone attempt to produce a detailed/credible work. Readers can then weigh up all options and decide for themselves.

        I am working on a website similar to Quran434.com, on which I intend to summarise the views I have expressed in this thread. Verse 434 was the first verse I had difficulty understanding in my teenage years, and ultimately it was an article online which enlightened me on the more likely meaning. I think it's important for people to have access to such interpretations and to be aware of the level of misinterpretation the Qur'an has suffered. I don't have a date of completion, but I will post a link when it is complete (God-willing).

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        • H Offline
          H Offline
          hawk99
          wrote on last edited by
          #236

          peace hawk99,

          I agree that it can't mean "divorce", however I disagree that it is "definitive and understandable" as I mention here. Feel free to show several people the verse with "leave them" or "separate from them" in the verse and see if they all give the same answer in terms of what it means. This might give one a good indication if it is "definitive and understandable". Let us know what you find.

          Peace Wakas,

          Stating "going to a relatives or friends house for time to think, cool off or give space even in the same house is
          definitive and understandable by most". meaning that act of creating space is understood by most, not an attempt
          to translate the verse, just the simple act of creating room between the two parties which is what most folks do.

          I agree, but I'm not sure why you're asking me. This specific issue is discussed at length on Quran434.com

          Just for once I would like someone who thinks that the beat/separate discussion is complicated to consider the
          actual beating part of the debate i.e., when to beat, how to beat, with what to beat, should children be present,
          how long to beat, what bruises are acceptable etc., then many will see how barbaric the beat translation is and
          conclude that it is not much of a debate at all!

          God bless

          peace

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          • WakasW Offline
            WakasW Offline
            Wakas
            wrote on last edited by
            #237

            Update
            I recently noticed that "madaji3" is in the "maf3il" form, meaning it can theoretically mean "times of sleep" as well as "places of sleep" i.e. "beds/bedrooms".

            I have updated the website accordingly

            "...and abandon them in the bed..." (Arabic hjuroo, root ha-Jiim-Ra), means forsake, leave off, desert, abandon .
            It is important to note this verb applies to the husband, NOT the wife, thus translations such as "banish them to beds apart "(M. Pickthal), "send them to beds apart" (Dawood), are incorrect. This is further proven by the use of "fee" meaning "in". Lastly, "al madajiAA" (root Dad-Jiim-Ayn) is plural, and literally means "the times/places of rest/sleep/reclining", thus could mean 'the times of sleep' or 'the bed' or even 'the bedroom'. With regard to "al madajiAA" there is no half measures, it clearly means fully abandon/desert them in this. It seems to also imply no sexual relations. Also, this step reinforces the implication that it is unlikely to be a simultaneous series of steps, as "abandon them in the bed or times of sleep" would only be done at sleeping time, implying a time gap. This step should not be viewed as totally against the wife, as it would also result in the husband re-evaluating their relationship, and make him weigh up his fear against his desire to be with her, thus helping compromise/reconciliation.
            As a side note, if a spouse is possibly having an affair, then not sharing beds (i.e. no sex) could also potentially reduce spread of sexually transmitted diseases, giving another benefit of this advice/step.

            And

            Other examples of word form "maf3il" in AQ include "majalis", "mantiq", "mawazin", "mawatin", "mawadi3", "madaji3". There may be others. If the reader knows of any, please let me know. Their usage seems to indicate this form can indicate time/place/concept. Please read all occurrences.

            The only forms that I came across of "maf3al" in AQ were "marqad", "mankab", "mash3ar", "mashrab" and "majma'a" and all seem to denote place. There may be others. If the reader knows of any, please let me know. Please read all occurrences.

            To conclude, the word form "ma3fil" (same as "masjid&quot can indicate a noun of time/place (and perhaps concept). This is well established and accepted. Thus, to state "masjid" may mean a noun of time should not be seen as unusual.

            All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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            • H Offline
              H Offline
              hawk99
              wrote on last edited by
              #238

              Peace,

              As far as "cite" is concerned, could someone give a definition of "cite", also use it in their translation
              of 4/34.

              God bless,

              peace

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              • WakasW Offline
                WakasW Offline
                Wakas
                wrote on last edited by
                #239

                peace hawk99,

                It's all explained on the website www.Quran434.com with translation. Have you read it?

                The men are supporters/maintainers of the women with what God bestowed on some of them over others and with what they spent of their money, so the righteous women are dutiful; guardians to the unseen with what God guarded. And as for those women you fear their disloyalty, then (first) you shall advise them, and (second) abandon them in the bed, and (lastly) cite them. If they obeyed you, then seek not against them a way; Truly, God is High, Great.
                And if you (authority) feared a rift between them two, then appoint a judge from his family and a judge from hers. If they both want to reconcile, then God will bring agreement between them. God is Knowledgeable, Expert.

                cite them

                An interesting example also appears in 581-4 in which a woman argues with the prophet complaining about her husband, and how the husband has estranged/alienated her by claiming her to be as his mother's back, which was a practice of the time, making the wife unlawful for himself but also not technically divorcing her allowing her to remarry, i.e. leaving her stuck/suspended.
                This is an interesting example because if we suppose this could be classed as a case of iAAradan/alienation or shiqaqa/breach/rift, then the next step the wife took was to cite her husband's behaviour/actions to the authority, which would have been the prophet at the time. The correlation is specifically with 4129 which advises the husband not to leave her stuck/suspended and this is the EXACT situation described in 581-4, thus showing that in a situation of no resolution, the next step would be to cite the partner/situation to the authority. If we correlate this example to what the next step would be in 434, if the steps are followed and no resolution is forthcoming, the next step would be to cite the partner to the authority. This would explain how the court/authority knew of the situation between the couple in 435. Since 'idriboo them' is the only step in between "abandon them in bed" and the authority becoming aware of the situation, is there a Classical Arabic meaning of DRB that fits in the sequence? The answer is a resounding yes, as one of its primary and most common meanings is to cite/propound, declare/mention, put/show forth, point out or indicate. As we can see, it is a perfect fit.

                All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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                • H Offline
                  H Offline
                  hawk99
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #240

                  peace hawk99,

                  It's all explained on the website www.Quran434.com with translation. Have you read it?

                  cite them

                  Peace Wakas,

                  Thank you, I surmise in the context of 4/34 "cite" equals "report" (to authorities) which could include
                  family members also clerics and counselors yes/no?

                  God bless

                  peace

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                  • WakasW Offline
                    WakasW Offline
                    Wakas
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #241

                    The answer to your question is specifically addressed at www.Quran434.com

                    "...then appoint a judge..." (Arabic ibAAatho hakaman, roots Ba-Ayn-Thal, Ha-Kaf-Miim), literally means to put in motion or send/appoint a judge/arbiter. The Arabic confirms that the plural "you" can ONLY refer to someone/something in a position to put this in motion, so it cannot mean either side's family for example. Also, appointing an arbiter from each side is not a simple task as it would require representations from husband and wife or each side of the family, and suggests the process has become formalised, i.e. judicial. This clearly confirms the court/authority is involved at this stage.

                    Have you read it?

                    All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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                    • H Offline
                      H Offline
                      hawk99
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #242

                      Peace Wakas,

                      Thanks for the reply, according the websites translation below "if they obey you" pertains to the husband
                      being obeyed, is this correct, if so please elaborate.

                      The men are supporters/maintainers of the women with what God bestowed on some of them over others
                      and with what they spent of their money, so the righteous women are dutiful; guardians to the unseen with
                      what God guarded. And as for those women you fear their disloyalty, then (first) you shall advise them, and
                      (second) abandon them in the bed, and (lastly) cite them. If they obeyed you, then seek not against them a
                      way; Truly, God is High, Great.

                      And if you (authority) feared a rift between them two, then appoint a judge from his family and a judge from
                      hers. If they both want to reconcile, then God will bring agreement between them. God is Knowledgeable,
                      Expert.

                      God bless

                      peace

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                      • WakasW Offline
                        WakasW Offline
                        Wakas
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #243

                        Again, the answer to your question is specifically addressed at www.Quran434.com

                        I recommend reading it.

                        All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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                        • H Offline
                          H Offline
                          hawk99
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #244

                          Peace Wakas,

                          Thanks again, at the moment I have no time to study such a lengthy article.

                          God bless

                          peace

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                          • A Offline
                            A Offline
                            aqua
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #245

                            I am working on a website similar to Quran434.com, on which I intend to summarise the views I have expressed in this thread. Verse 434 was the first verse I had difficulty understanding in my teenage years, and ultimately it was an article online which enlightened me on the more likely meaning. I think it's important for people to have access to such interpretations and to be aware of the level of misinterpretation the Qur'an has suffered. I don't have a date of completion, but I will post a link when it is complete (God-willing).

                            As promised, I have completed my article on verse 434 of the Qur'an and have published it on a dedicated website. The website is www.quranverse434.com . I have tried to keep the article concise by not being unnecessarily lengthy, yet thorough by covering all the relevant points. Let me know what you all think. You can click on the image below to be taken to the website.

                            http//www.quranverse434.com/images/quranverse434_screenshot.png

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                            • U Offline
                              U Offline
                              uq
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #246

                              Peace aqua,

                              I commend you, my brother.

                              The article is thoroughly detailed, easy to read, well-laid out, well-written, rational, cohesive, articulate, accurate, and revealing.

                              It must have taken you some time to compose it, but your effort shines through.

                              I will share it on my Facebook profile.

                              I am of the opinion that God, the most merciful, would not possibly instruct the believers to beat their wives at a time when marital relations are already strained. However, the rules of Arabic grammar get in the way of this understanding.

                              The only way out of understanding the verse as "beat them" is ? as you point out ? to postulate that the early readers of the Quran misread for . This is not an unlikely case.

                              Thanks again for sharing.

                              Usamah

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                              • A Offline
                                A Offline
                                aqua
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #247

                                Peace aqua,

                                I commend you, my brother.

                                The article is thoroughly detailed, easy to read, well-laid out, well-written, rational, cohesive, articulate, accurate, and revealing.

                                It must have taken you some time to compose it, but your effort shines through.

                                I will share it on my Facebook profile.

                                I am of the opinion that God, the most merciful, would not possibly instruct the believers to beat their wives at a time when marital relations are already strained. However, the rules of Arabic grammar get in the way of this understanding.

                                The only way out of understanding the verse as "beat them" is ? as you point out ? to postulate that the early readers of the Quran misread for . This is not an unlikely case.

                                Thanks again for sharing.

                                Usamah

                                Thank you for the positive comments. Glad to hear that you agree.

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                                • S Offline
                                  S Offline
                                  shohorabA
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #248

                                  This is the first time I have seen such an effort on one point of any book. A crucial point no doubt. Because of people like you we have less work and better understanding.

                                  Thank you again.

                                  Peace.

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                                  • WakasW Offline
                                    WakasW Offline
                                    Wakas
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #249

                                    In Jonathan Brown's new book he reviews Traditional Islamic understandings of 434 with some interesting insights, p268 onwards.
                                    For those familiar with his previous book on Hadith, it is likely this work will be of similar standard. I personally found his book on Hadith to be excellent. In this work there seems to be many gems also, e.g. he cites a hadith in which the prophet requested a woman to lead a mixed gender congregation prayer. He also discusses the 'Quran Only' movement.

                                    All information is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should always seek knowledge and verify for themselves when possible: 17:36, 20:114, 35:28, 49:6, 58:11.

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                                    • U Offline
                                      U Offline
                                      Unbeliever
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #250

                                      Why does it take 40 pages or even any "holy book" at all to validate that wife beating is wrong? Doesn't thinking about our own moms give us empathy enough to know that is wrong without being told?

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                                      • H Offline
                                        H Offline
                                        hawk99
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #251

                                        Why does it take 40 pages or even any "holy book" at all to validate that wife beating is wrong? Doesn't thinking about our own moms give us empathy enough to know that is wrong without being told?

                                        @Unbeliever welcome

                                        God bless you

                                        peace

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                                        • H Offline
                                          H Offline
                                          huruf
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #252

                                          4.34 is not addressed to husbands but to the community of believers. It is hardly to be taken that the community of believers be told to "beat" a woman just like that.

                                          Also, it speakes not about husbands and wives but about men and women, nothing to do with husbands.

                                          It also does not say that any woman (not wife) has doen anything wrong but that the community of believers FEARS that "they" the women, whoever they are, might to something wrong, but up till then nobody has done anything wrong, so nobody can be "beaten" for something that has not even hapenned.

                                          Teh "idribuhunna" word has certainly avery different meaning from beat, it means as can be logically deducted to do something practical to avoid those women to do something that would be bad for them and the community. Let us not forget that this aya is part of a whole set of ayas that deal with social questions and it also deals with social questions. It is incumbent on the community as a whole thatit takes care fo the women, just as it is incumbent on the whole male population to take care of women in general. This is the question in the aya, that women are looked after, not that women should be punished for whatever imaginary doings might come to mind.

                                          So it should something on the line of finding out from the women themselves, let them know the consequences that their prospected actions might have, let them think about the whole thing by themselves and when some solution is found for the situation of the women, carry it out with them.

                                          Salaam

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