Christian In-Laws
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My in-laws don't know about my conversion yet and I hadn't planned on telling them until it happened to come up. I have had discussions before my conversion about not believing Jesus is God and my disbelief in the trinity.
When it does come up it will probably be a situation where it's not just my wife's parents but also uncles and aunts and brothers and so on because it usually comes up at large family gatherings like dinners after they attend church. I am really looking forward to the exchange. I was just wondering if anyone else here has had a similar experience and had any advice.
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Salaam brother Duke,
My in-laws don't know about my conversion yet and I hadn't planned on telling them until it happened to come up. I have had discussions before my conversion about not believing Jesus is God and my disbelief in the trinity.
When it does come up it will probably be a situation where it's not just my wife's parents but also uncles and aunts and brothers and so on because it usually comes up at large family gatherings like dinners after they attend church. I am really looking forward to the exchange. I was just wondering if anyone else here has had a similar experience and had any advice.
It is always better not to tell by yourself and wait until it happened to come up as you said above.
I am also a convert, but not from Christianity but I was born in Mahdavi then converted to a Sunni, then converted again to Ahle-Hadeeth , then converted again to a Muslim .
But I never disclosed my conversion to anyone. At about 2 and half years now, I got divorced on my conversion to a Muslim , it came out by itself while discussing matters, I did not say that to anyone, not even my wife. But I tried to correct her in some places where I found her wrong, so she came to know.
Brother, I strongly suggest you not to disclose it to anyone and seek Allah's help ALWAYS, on each an every step you take. And remember He is the all Knower and all Listener.
May Allah help in each step we take and guide us all to His path pr
Mohammed M. Khan -
Brother, I strongly suggest you not to disclose it to anyone and seek Allah's help ALWAYS, on each an every step you take. And remember He is the all Knower and all Listener.
I strongly agree with mmkhan on this one. I'm having trouble right now because my entire extended family is very devoutly christian. If I were to come out of the islamic closet as it were, my wife would guaranteed to divorce me and my mother would weep for weeks. Converting out of christianity would be seen as the ultimate betrayal and folly. I dont' even want to imagine the hostile environment I would put myself in if my family discovered. I'm trying to slowly hint to my wife about inconsistencies with Allah's previous revelations and the teachings of paul, and I'll see how far that goes.
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My opinion is that if your opinion is asked on some topic related to religion, or if you not disclosing your faith would cause you to do something that you think goes against islam, then you shouldnt keep quiet. Parading around with the banner of islam is probably not a good idea ), but there will always come a time when you would be coerced into coming out and being open about your faith..and I dont think hiding it would solve issues..however since every persons situation is different, im sure you guys know to what extent you can or cannot disclose your faith.
I chose to be very open about my faith...its hard with my full on shia background..but iv made it quite clear that my beliefs are very different.....its hard, but then again evrything thats worth having in this life is gained by hardship...if your open about your faith and confident with it, then maybe people around you can start asking questions or being curious (after they let out their frustration ))
peace.
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My in-laws don't know about my conversion yet and I hadn't planned on telling them until it happened to come up. I have had discussions before my conversion about not believing Jesus is God and my disbelief in the trinity.
When it does come up it will probably be a situation where it's not just my wife's parents but also uncles and aunts and brothers and so on because it usually comes up at large family gatherings like dinners after they attend church. I am really looking forward to the exchange. I was just wondering if anyone else here has had a similar experience and had any advice.
Peace,
Need more details If you don't mind... How did those discussions go? What is your wife's view on it? Is she a convert as well? No other couple in the family that has a marriage of mix faiths?
I think it largely depends on what kind of in-laws we are dealing with here. If they are the ultraconservative-palin4life-sort, probably not the best idea. But if they are at least a little open-minded, sure why not. Also, I don't know If you should outright tell them that you've 'converted'. Islam is not superficial, It resides in your heart. Usually, I find it best not to discuss religion/politics unless there are certain parameters in place. Huge difference between a mutually beneficial discourse than 'I'm right and here to prove you wrong'. It gets nobody anywhere. It really depends on you, your spouse, and your personality. We shouldn't hide from the truth, but we also shouldn't create a discord in an otherwise, presumably, healthy relationship.
Perhaps, gradually tell them about the progression in your views? All the while being respectful of their choices thus asking them to respect yours. "Non-muslims" in my experience get wholly fascinated by the misconceptions regarding Islam. Focus on that perhaps?
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Salaamun all,
My opinion is that if your opinion is asked on some topic related to religion, or if you not disclosing your faith would cause you to do something that you think goes against islam, then you shouldnt keep quiet. Parading around with the banner of islam is probably not a good idea ), but there will always come a time when you would be coerced into coming out and being open about your faith..and I dont think hiding it would solve issues..however since every persons situation is different, im sure you guys know to what extent you can or cannot disclose your faith.
I chose to be very open about my faith...its hard with my full on shia background..but iv made it quite clear that my beliefs are very different.....its hard, but then again evrything thats worth having in this life is gained by hardship...if your open about your faith and confident with it, then maybe people around you can start asking questions or being curious (after they let out their frustration ))
peace.
I am sorry, I think my post above is not clear enough on my stand. Sorry for confusion.
Let me clear it a bit.
1- I never tell anyone about my faith by myself.
5332
5332 They avoid major sins and lewdness, except for minor offences. Your Lord is with vast forgiveness. He has been fully aware of you since He initiated you from the earth, and while you were embryos in the wombs of your mothers. Therefore, do not ascribe purity to yourselves; He is fully aware of the righteous.
2- I never hide ANY thing if someone ask me.
2159
21602159 Surely those who conceal what We have sent down to them of the clarities and the guidance, after We Had made it clear for the people in the Book; these will be cursed by Allah and be cursed by those who curse.
2160 Except those who repent and amend and clarify; for those I will accept their repentance, for I am the One who accepts repentance, the Merciful.3- I never hide nor show off my practices/rituals in my home.
17110
17110 Say Call on Allah or call on the Almighty; by whichever you call on, to Him are the best names. And do not be too loud in making your contact prayer, nor too quiet; but seek a path in between.
"Wa laa tajhar bi Salaatik" does not mean as it is said in above translation. Look at the difference below.
207
207 And if you will declare openly what you say, then surely He knows the secret and what is hidden."Tajhar bil Qawl" means "Open your talk" or "Open what you say" or "Say openly", etc..
"Tajhar bi Salaatik" means "Open your Salaat" or "Open what you do" or "Do your Salaat openly", etc..
In other words, "do not show off your Salaat nor hide it completely but seek a moderate way".
You can also refer 255, 7148 and many more to clarify.
Hope this clarifies my stand, inshaAllah.
May Allah guide us all towards the truth pr
Mohammed M. Khan -
My in-laws don't know about my conversion yet and I hadn't planned on telling them until it happened to come up.
You converted? From what to what?
I have had discussions before my conversion about not believing Jesus is God and my disbelief in the trinity.
You don't need to 'convert' to not believing Jesus is God or denouncing Trinity..
When it does come up it will probably be a situation where it's not just my wife's parents but also uncles and aunts and brothers and so on because it usually comes up at large family gatherings like dinners after they attend church. I am really looking forward to the exchange. I was just wondering if anyone else here has had a similar experience and had any advice.
I don't believe in sooo many of Sunni's doctrine but I didn't say that I have 'converted'... and I don't think such is necessary.
I'm fully aware of the 'suffering' on being born into a sectarian and cultist world as I was also born in a situation where I was surrounded by a bunch of sectarians and cultists. It is very hard to 'disown' the sectarian way of thinking as it has been embroidered within my brain since I was a little toddler. The notion of 'conversion' is also a legacy from such sectarian and cultist environment.
My advice
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Stop the 'illusion' that you have 'converted', don't even mention the word at all to the sectarians and cultists.
As among the 'sectarians' (Sunnis, Shiites, Quranist, Biblist, Vedist, Christians, Catholics, Orthodox, Judaism etc..) they hate the word 'converted' which equals to Infidel or Murtaad or 'leaving the cult' and they will think that you deserved to be burnt in Hell for all eternity. Which is incorrect as according to Bible the punishment for "Infidel" or "Somebody who leaves the cult" is stoning to death. -
As example I don't believe that "Jogging in circle around a black cubicle cube" is a pious or useful act (they called it TAWAF) and sometimes my relatives told some 'bizarre stories' around such act, in which I stay silent or nod in response as I believe everyone had a right to believe whatever they wanted (it is called TOLERANCE attitude that no sectarians or cultists would ever understand). But if they ask me regarding my opinion I will answer it honestly that I don't believe such act are useful or a pious act and again if they ask why, I will explain my argumentation. You can apply the same attitude to your situation, when it arises. When it doesn't arise don't mention it.
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Remember that it is God's responsibility (yes it's God's and not YOU) to guide people to the right path. And you don't have any obligation or authority whatsoever to sway people to your belief or see things the same way as your perspective. (This is again an attitude of sectarians / cultist).
Salam / Peace
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