Marrying an Athiest/Agnostic I dated before reverting to Islam?
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Hawk,
What one says is not necessarily what one believes, in fact most of the time it is not. Many times we are just palying devil advocates with some things, that if we dared to believe we might risk horrible disapointments.
On the other hand we do know, we do know too much of those who say they believe and with their deeds show just the opposite. The other way around is also a fact.
The thing is that belief in many of the things that we consider part of belief are so much misused and confused that it is no wonder that people do not want to be part of it.
So to me the words of the man do not mean anything, just a mental-social phenomenon which does not say much about his deep truth.
Salaam
Peace Huruf, I think you give good reasons to have a wali. I personally
value second opinions from knowledgeable individuals, marriage is nothing
to be taken lightly and should be approached carefully. Elm is doing the
the right thing by coming to free minds to get advice.We make similar jokes. What if her guy is living by Quranic laws without being aware of it?
Peace Reel, it's not just the jokes, but this
tells me that Islam is a fairy tale and that God probably does not exist.
Part of the joy of marriage is sharing the deen with one another, that in itself is a benefit of
marrying a believer.2/221
And do not marry polytheistic women until they believe
And do not marry polytheistic men until they believe.peace
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Peace Reel, it's not just the jokes, but this
tells me that Islam is a fairy tale and that God probably does not exist.
Part of the joy of marriage is sharing the deen with one another, that in itself is a benefit of
marrying a believer.2/221
And do not marry polytheistic women until they believe
And do not marry polytheistic men until they believe.peace
There are lots of descriptions in the Quran about what polytheistic people do. The title itself doesn't seem to be enough. Once I made a comment to my husband, "hahaha, Jesus is dead just like Muhammad, they can't hear your prayer, they don't fulfill your wishes". This did not affect anything between us. People change and jokes don't rule our lives. ELM can leave him only if he is going against God's laws. The guy will, of course, change. I can confirm you that and marriage is the one that does that quite well.
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I think we should not ever forget about the mawadda and the rahma that God puts between woman and man. W sort of take for a common place, but when you come to think of it, it is the key.
I spoke I don't kow in which thread, about the man who wwent to a whoerehouse and then married the woman to whom he was client. They ended up having a very good marriage. Forget about education level, and other classical afinities.
My guess is that the man, and the woman, by the same token discovered that mawadda and rahma between them and behaved accordingly.
I also know of quite a number of couples who paper married because she got pregnant. In a way it was forced, but they ended up lasting all their life...
May be it is that as soon as we let that mawadda and rahma rule our relationships, wonders occur.
So may be it is not only what we do before "the marriage", but may be as much what we do after it, whether we react angrily or whether we react with friendship and mercy.
Salaam