Ladies - do you wear hijab?
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SaLaM Tahira
Tahira teach your daughter the right thing. Tell her that at the end of the day, its what GOD thinks that matters... not what her grandmother or uncles thinks. Share your kowledhe with her. How old is she? Show her what you have learnt. Get her involved in this, slowly. No doubt now that ur brother in law and ur mom will double their efforts to effect your daughter's judgement by telling her what to do.
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salaam
Where do such hadiths come from and who actually believe such nonsense?
I am afraid over 90% of so called muslims. It is one of the tragedies of te muslim world. You indeed are very fortunate if you ave not come across the hadith fascists. In fact if you dont accept hadith alongside Quran they will declare you Kafir(now that must ring few bells).
I am afraid the scenario Tahira desribes is only too common and very familiar and unfortunately even more depressing for someone like Tahira as there are so few women who question authority of hadiths, therefore very few who will understand her view point.Note for Tahira, just be careful as how vocally you express your stance to others in your family or the community as things can become very nasty.
You may have to work to on your family gradually. Why not start a Quran studying group within your family as they are unlikely to object. Go through non controversial subjects initially like Haj, Fasting, salat etc they might be surprised at they had percieved and what the Quran says and perhaps eventually you could tackle the subject of Hadith and try to interpert suras such as 456 and 7185.
It might not atill work but it is worth a try-be very patient.
regards -
Salam Stillearning
. You indeed are very fortunate if you ave not come across the hadith fascists. In fact if you dont accept hadith alongside Quran they will declare you Kafir
Brother, don't call them fascists, 'cause they're really something different. You cannot call them fascissts and at the same time complain that they call you Kafir. It's better for us not to mix things up and not use these phrases too much.
Salam
warda -
Salam
stillearning your post is so very true . I do need to be careful and yes you do get called kafir if you object to any of the Hadith. Your approach sounds good though. I do find myself cornered by everyone but this headscarf buisness is getting a bit out of hand.
Warda i suppose you are right that calling them names won't do any good because its not their fault their heads have been filled with all that nonsense.
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Hi Tahira,
At the moment i am having a hard time trying to deal with my mum and brother in law who are bullying my daughter(who is now 12) into wearing a headscarf. They are using these same Hadith/sayings to try and scare her. They also told me i am a bad influence on her.
Dont let anyone tell u what to do with ur life or with ur chidren. U r old enough to decide for ur own. And its ur responsibility to live and to bring up ur children to the best of ur understanding. Ur family memebers can and should deal with their lives the way they wish and not command u on what to do. So, dont get annyoyed by what they say. Just plain ignore and do what u feel is right.
By the way Jaxal, my mum doesn't even know how to read or write. She has never read the Quran and depends completley on relatives, mullahs and what she hears from others. Yet she is not willing to listen to what i have to say.
Ignorance coupled with irrational fear is the culprit.
My brother in law is just one of those miserable sunnis who repeats everything he hears at mosque(like a parrot). He tries to portray this image of a pious and righteous muslim who knows better than me because he was brought up in pakistan, and i am considered too westernised to understand islam.
I know, Tahira. I have met these kinds. But the sad reality is the minds of young men get so brainwashed by those imam's speeches(no matter what they say) in mosques. Wonder when and if they will ever think and contemplate for themselves???
Peace!
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Because Hijab nowadays is sexy! You can see them here too. Lots of make-up in their face and you can even see the string through her skirt (!!) but wearing hijab!
I didn't want to mention the string .... glad you did. D
I've also noticed that by wearing hijab they develop some sort of superiority complex over those who don't, and that all their bad actions will be forgiven because of the hijab.
Guys develop something similar by going to Jumma prayers. It doesn't matter what crimes they commit, if they've read jumma and quoted a few hadith to friends they'll be allright.
I saw a tv show once, where a reporter was asking muslims coming from jumma what the last sentence from al-fathiha meant in their language. Not one was able to answer. the classic answer comes from a Hafiz-Quran, "I don't know what it means, I just memorise it". Finally an arab dude saves the day and answers the question.
peace
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As Salaam Alaikum,
I will never understand how others can try to knock others down to try to boost their own confidence.
Please do not act as if there are no "no hijab" wearing sisters going around acting as if they are not superior than the hijabis, as if they are somewhat more privledged. Most of them with this mentality i can say, are quite ignorant.
Free-Minds.org, calls itself prgoressive. But yet it seems as if many of the members are just 16th century rulers wanting to control women.
For those who call hijab "silly", and throw other insults towards it... you are no different than the ones who call you "bad muslims" for not wearing it or saying it's ok not to.
You may think that you sound progressive, or "free", because you are talking shiz about it, but you really are not. Just another extremist if you ask me.
LET WOMEN DRESS HOW THEY WANT TO DRESS! WHY MUST YOU CRITISIZE?!
salaam
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Peacefulmuslim sweetheart you can always read my mind.
burhan_21 you must be psychic too , i do kind of feel inferior when going past girls wearing hijab especially when they stare at me.
NoProgressive so true. I see girls not wearing hijab who look down on girls that do, yet they themselves look like tramps.
My neice is 11yrs old She gets forced to wear a scarf by her dad(my brother in law). She has told me about a 1000 times how much she hates wearing it and yet when my daughter gets bullied by my mum and mob she also joins in.
my mum always told me i would be hung from my hair for infinity for not covering my head. So iv'e cut my hair short. Now she tells me that as a punishment i am going to have to find and collect (with a tweezer )every hair that i cut off and then i will be dragged by my hair till my skin tears off.
I'm thinking of going for shave now.
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SaLaM Tahira and NP
Scare tactics. Nothing else.
NP, no one is bad mouthing hijabs. Atleast i hope not. But IM saying is that to make a woman wear hijab forcefully USING religion is disgusting. ITs not just silly, its stupid. ANd yes, in that case , wearing hijabs become an act of stupidity. My heart cries for women who are forced to wear hijab. I am guilty of this sin.
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deleted. Sorry no message.
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SaLaM Tahira
Ill double post here to outline a point for you.
I hope, you take the time out to educate your daughter AND your neice about the isssue of hijabs. This is very important. ESPECIALLY at the age they are ate. This is the time. My heart breaks for your neice who is forced to wear hijab. Such oppersion should be left back in pakistan. UK is no place for this rubbish. Plz dont think that im trying to tell you what to do. But i think its important that your daughter is educated on this issue so if your mom or ur brother in law try to fill her head with nonsense, she will know the truth and wont be easily played by them.
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Hi all,
Where do such hadiths come from and who actually believe such nonsense?
I am afraid over 90% of so called muslims. It is one of the tragedies of te muslim world. You indeed are very fortunate if you ave not come across the hadith fascists. In fact if you dont accept hadith alongside Quran they will declare you Kafir(now that must ring few bells).
I have come across people who spell out hadiths for every thing......sit, walk, stand etc...
Though the main focus in my families has been hadith on reciting Quran. Like they believe reciting some particular sura some number of times, benefits ur health, or takes u near heaven etc...as supposedly said by Prophet Mohammed.
The hadiths that Tahira has frequently mentioned of women being called hell dwellers and sinners and evil ones etc.........I have never heard them....propably coz no one dare say such stuff in our society against women. or propably becoz reason and understanding dooms such stupid belief.......I am afraid the scenario Tahira desribes is only too common and very familiar and unfortunately even more depressing for someone like Tahira as there are so few women who question authority of hadiths, therefore very few who will understand her view point.
We have hadith followers too in our society and family. U just cant make sense with them.
I just let them be. They can believe what they wish and I shall believe what makes sense to me.
Tahira, I'd suggest u do the same.Note for Tahira, just be careful as how vocally you express your stance to others in your family or the community as things can become very nasty.
You may have to work to on your family gradually. Why not start a Quran studying group within your family as they are unlikely to object. Go through non controversial subjects initially like Haj, Fasting, salat etc they might be surprised at they had percieved and what the Quran says and perhaps eventually you could tackle the subject of Hadith and try to interpert suras such as 456 and 7185.
It might not atill work but it is worth a try-be very patient.
regardsActually, stillearning, most of these hadith followers dont believe or see the need to understand Quran. Their focus is on recitation. And that is the main problem. If they understand Quran and read good translations, the Hadiths which make no sense will dissappear from their minds, coz most of Hadith contradicts Quran. The other day, I was just browsing through a Dua book, which my Aunt had gifted me. It contained a hadith where Prophet Mohammed is supposed to have said, no body can reach towards God except through me. It so Reminded me of what the christians believe about Jesus.
my mum always told me i would be hung from my hair for infinity for not covering my head. So iv'e cut my hair short. Now she tells me that as a punishment i am going to have to find and collect (with a tweezer )every hair that i cut off and then i will be dragged by my hair till my skin tears off.
I'm thinking of going for shave now.That is the most ridiculous thing I have heard in my entire life.
The dramatisation is quite funny rotfl
What a crazy world we live in!But why are u scared? why do u need to chop ur hair becoz of their stupid thoughts?
Come on , Tahira, Be who u r and do only what u believe in . -
This Hijab thing has got nothing to do with Islam. Islam foster modesty. Women can be covered with leaves or papers if they want to; the take home message is just be modest.
This is 2005 and we do not have to wast time on the Hijab issue. What we need to do is to help each other. We have to get out of the mess around us.
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NoProgressive Who told you we called hijab silly, we are saying exactly what you are saying that women should have a choice.
What we are saying here is that people who force women to wear hijab and people who try to show women that don't wear hijab as liberated are wrong. Hijab is on a garment FULL STOP.
What my brothers and sisters(who you called extremists)are trying to do is sympathise with my current situation.
I am very happy for those women that wear hijab and feel liberated but my daughter doesn't want to wear one.
So how is it ok that you can call us (humans) extremists but we can't say anything bad about a piece of material. The material/garment is not going to be offended but your brothers and sisters on this forum will be.
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As Salaam Alaikum,
What my brothers and sisters(who you called extremists)are trying to do is sympathise with my current situation.
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I am not referign to the post that you made, or the ones that were replying to it.
salaam
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Jaxal the BNP thing you said, you are scaring me now. True there are still honour killings going on and even in the uk. There is the one about the girl in bradford 3 , she forced into marriage and when she came back here she wanted to get out of it so her uncles and brothers ran over her in their car about 6 times(but iv'e heard it was8 times). Then there was another family in bradford who had a daughter (with her own mind and views on forced marriage) so her family including mum and dad chopped her up and kept in a very large freezer(the type you have at the butchers that opens on the top).
Others just take their girls to pakistan and bump them off there. -
NoProgressive So what did you mean when you said
Free-Minds.org, calls itself prgoressive. But yet it seems as if many of the members are just 16th century rulers wanting to control women. -
peace,
As a side note, al-quran does not use "hijab" the way it is being used here, in fact, it is not even an item of clothing in al-quran. By using it as such, one is only perpetuating the myth.
Women can wear a veil if they wish, but the best garment is the garment of righteousness according to al-quran. So according to al-quran itself, if one were to list an order of importance, it would be righteousness first. Something to think about.
Please remember though, most Muslims have not actually read the book (in a language they understand) that they claim to follow, i.e. al-quran. And conjecture is no substitute for the truth.
Wakas
