gender roles in marriage
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the traditional roles of husband and wife, as we all know, has been that the husband oversees the wellfare of the family and makes final decisions on things while the wife supports him. this role is beneficial, given that both parties are ok with their roles. my question is- how islamic is this relationship? one issue is that of shirk. this may be extreme, but could placing your spouse as an authoritiy figure constitute shirk? muslim tradition has placed women in a subordinate role in family decision making- to the point of suggesting almost complete obedience to her husband. can this constitute shirk?
another issue is that of equity. what kind of relationship does the quran advise between a husband and wife? the husband playing a superior role seems like an inequity. does the holy quran promote this kind of relationship? if not, are women doing an injustice to themselves and perhaps not following islam by allowing unequal roles to exist? there is a verse that is oftentimes translated as men being in charge of women. www.liberalislam.net has an article about gender roles that has a different interpretation of the verse. the author states that the verse is referring to men financially taking care of women, not being in charge of them- the same way they would financially take care of their kids. it has nothing to do with men being in charge of women in any other way. so what is God's will for us as husbands and wives? is it islamic to have a traditional role? is it islamic to not have one? i would like arguments that are backed by the quran, cuz we can all come up with lots of arguments for both sides.