You broke far too many rules trying to produce "a surah like it", I suggest you try again P
sugar
As'salaam u'Alykum there,
Um, I agree with Sugar. Simply because we will not even come close to the majesty of the recital (al'quran). That said, here is my rendition of Book 1 of the Psalms of David, Chapter 4. I have added my thoughts along the way, just so that we're clear about the subject, syntax and semantics aside. And, I apologize in advance for the length of what I want to offer for consideration, given... we categorically will not be able to produce a 'surah' the likes of which are in the Quran.
One last comment, since Hadith peddlers are rampant, it is likely, impossible, not to come in contact with one tradition or the other. That's a simple fact. That said, pardon my use of two, one of which this site cherishes very much.
Pardon (the length) and enjoy!
Bismillah Chapter 4
Answer me when I call, Oh Allah of my own right (to call on you)!
you have given me room when I was in distress. Be gracious to me, and hear my prayer.
Ya ayu'han nas (O mankind!) how long shall my honour suffer shame? How long will you love vain words, and seek after lies? Salah
But KNOW that Allah has set apart the righteous (salih - believers, "goodly", perhaps further, and I urge caution with using this word flippantly, "godly" Etc.) for the majesty of the most merciful (allah); ALLAh hears when I call to....
Be Angry, but DO NOT SIN; commune with your own hearts on your beds, and be silent (sabr - in Arabic expounds more clearly what David is saying, in my humble opinion). Salah (pray).
Offer right sacrifices, and put your trust in ALlah.
There are many who say, "Oh, that we might see some good!
Lift up the light of your demeanor, calm expression, and honourable majesty (countenance) upon us, ALLAH!"
Allah, you have put more joy in my heart than they have when their grain and wine abound.
In peace I will both lie down (awake) and sleep; for you ALONE ALLAH, makest me dwell in safety.
Ameen (amen).
Commentary
Again, Glory to Allah, the creator of all things. Masha'allah for the eloquence and beauty of David and the Psalms which were revealed to him. This is almost exactly the same beauty, if not more of the Qur'an, for those who understand it. It is majestic to put this subtly. When there is plenty, David remembers his creator, all day and night. He says earlier in the Psalms, blessed is he, who contemplates on the "sharia" of Allah. The LAW of Allah. Just to be clear, there is a difference between man made and the original Creator's LAW. I offer you to consider, and myself as well, could it be the same?
English is not succinct relative to Arabic. Arabic, in other words, is more perspicuous, more lucid. Hence, "we" (used in singular form) Muslims (a large and growing community), follow the meaning of why The Merciful, refers to Allah's majesty with those words. 'We' put simply, is the singlar expression of Allah's reference to self. Languages such as Arabic, Hindi, Urdu and various others, even French (for instance the use of 'tu' and 'vous' for "you" more clearly express the majesty of Allah. Arabic is, by far the best, even to a reader who does not know Arabic well enough.
That said, Allah says quiet clearly in the holy recital (Al' Qur'an), which Muhammad (peace on him), uttered to his contemporaries (translated in English as), "And remember David and Solomon when they gave judgement in the matter of the field into which the sheep of certain people had strayed by night We witnessed their judgement. To Solomon We inspired the right understanding of the matter, to each, We GAVE JUDGEMENT AND KNOWLEDGE; it was OUR POWER that made the HILLS and the birds Celebrate OUR PRAISES, it was WE WHO DID ALL" (Chapter 21, verses 78-79).
Further, my edition of the "Yusuf Ali Translation", of what Allah says in the Qur'an; Chapter 2, sign (ayat) 285, goes like this " The Messenger (Muhammad) believes in what has been revealed to him from his rabb (cherisher, sustainer, creator and lord etc.), as do men of faith. Each one (of them who believes in Allah, Allah's angels, Allah's books (The psalms, the proverbs etc.), and Allah's Messengers, SAY, " we make no distinction between one another of Allah's messengers" and they go on to say, "We hear, and we obey (perhaps, as Muslims), as we seek your forgiveness our rabb, as to you is our journey's end.""
This is important for a number of reasons. First David, Solomon and Muhammad were all people of Allah, and so are we. Put differently, they were mankind. You and I... are we not?
The prophet, Muhammad, on him be Allah's peace and blessings, said that life is a journey. Treat it as if you are a traveler on foot (a wayfarer), and take from it only what is necessary for the journey. And in addition, from another popular narration, "spread salaam", OR, SPREAD PEACE.
I leave you with this to consider.
Alykum'asalaam 'wa' Rahmatullah
On you be 'peace 'and' the mercy of Allah
Abdul'ghani