Purpose of quoting Ayah is that we have to restrict to what is prescribed not what we think is proper. Prohibited women are named by relationships and some by their belief and conduct. All other women in the world are permissible for marriage.

Okay, so then what is prescribed exactly?

Simply going by what is prescribed in that verse, let's assume your father has a sister and your mother also has a sister. Your parents' sisters are among those women who are prohibited to you for marriage. What's not on that list of women prohibited to you are your aunt's daughters, granddaughters, etc. I understand that the Quran does not encourage men (or their sons) to marry their aunts' daughters. However, because they are not on the list of those you cannot marry, would you say that based on that verse in the Quran, it is lawful for you to marry your cousins, should everyone be in agreement?

A yes or no answer would be appreciated.

According to 3350 , my understanding is that cousin marriage was permissible exclusively to prophet only , not for other muslims/mumins.

So then why is 422-24 worded in a way that gives one the impression that it is meant for all men? Is this yet another contradiction?

From 'islamweb.net ' And do not marry those whom your fathers married, except what has already occurred. Indeed, it was an immorality and hateful and was evil as a way. Prohibited to you are your mothers, your daughters, your sisters, your father?s sisters, your mother?s sisters, your brother?s daughters, your sister?s daughters, your mothers who nursed you, your sisters through nursing, your wives? mothers, and your step daughters under your guardianship of your wives unto whom you have gone in. But if you have not gone in unto them, there is no sin upon you. And the wives of your sons who are from your loins, and that you take two sisters simultaneously, except for what has already occurred. Indeed, Allaah is ever Forgiving and Merciful. And married women except those your right hands possess . the decree of Allaah upon you. And lawful to you are beyond these, that you seek them with your property, desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse..."

I did not say that the Qur'an prohibits it, but what I said, and it is a different thing completely is that the fact that there may be a lot of cousin marriages inc ertain countries is not due to the Qur'an, but to the usages of the people of the places where that happens. The Qur'an may not prohibit it but nowhere does it commend it specially].

Salaam

I was not implying that you said that. I was simply agreeing with you when you wrote "I do not think on the other hand that marriage between cousins is prohibited in many places." In 422-24, it clearly lists who a man cannot marry. Among those who he cannot marry are his aunts (father's sisters or mother's sisters). That is made clear. However, there is no mention that he or his sons cannot marry his aunts' daughters. Wouldn't you agree that by omitting them from the list of who a man cannot marry, it is the same as giving men permission to marry their aunts' daughters/granddaughters? It does not state that they should, I agree; however, since they are not included on the list of women prohibited to them, it implies that they can, should they choose to do so. Therefore, it is correct to say that although the Quran does not encourage it, it also does not prohibit the marrying of cousins (aunt's daughters or grandaughters.) Am I right?

Pl also refer 3350 to know the relationship of wives of the elevated Messenger

O you the Elevated and Chosen One ! pay attention;
It is a fact that We have affirmed it lawful for you, all your wives whom you have already paid their wedding gifts-determined and settled obligations.
They include She under your protection and responsibility-believing married woman in the fold of non-believer who migrated to believing society She whom Allah the Exalted in that state had brought-made her Ward under your authority and obligation.
And daughters of your paternal uncle, and the daughters of your paternal aunts;
And daughters of your maternal uncle and daughters of your maternal aunts; who migrated with you.
Moreover, that Believier Woman is affirmed lawful who had proposed herself for the Elevated and Chosen One when the Elevated and Chosen One had decided that he should affectionately take her in the fold of Nikah/wedding.
This sanctification notification is exclusively and solely for you, the Elevated and Chosen One , exclusive of the permission for other believers.
We certainly know what We have prescribed for them-ordinary believers the time/occasion bound in the matter of mates from protected families and the right possessed by them upon house-maid-male servants with permission of their family/believing married woman in the fold of non-believer who has migrated to believing society.
This pronouncement of sanctification of your marriages executed in the past is for the purpose that any objection causing disconcert-contraction might not lie against you.
And Allah the Exalted is repeatedly Overlooking/Forgiving, the Merciful.

Hi, Mazhar. In addition to posting verses, can you also answer the question in your own words? Are you implying that verses dealing with who men can and cannot marry were intended for Mohammad only? Please clarify.

I do not think cousin marriage is due to the Qur'an but to the customs of the countries. According to certain sources in fact in that area of the earth, like in Egypt marriage wxisted even between brothers and sisters.

I do not think on the other hand that marriage between cousisns is prohibited in many places. The reason why it is common in some places I think may have to do with not dividing property and saving dowries an so on mainly economic reasons.

Salaam

Huruf, I don't think it's prohibited since I've met and know of way too many Muslims married to their cousins. In their society, it seems to be perfectly normal. Based on what is written in 422-24, it clearly states that a man cannot marry his aunts (father's sisters or mother's sisters). Unless I've overlooked it, it doesn't state that he or his sons cannot marry his aunts' daughters. Based on what is written in the Quran, is it lawful for a man or his sons to marry his aunts' daughters (or granddaughters)?

I think there is a hadith. Of course nothing of the sort is in the Qur'an where nowhere is it stated thst women are more emotional nor any of that garbage psychology.

Salaam

Thank you, huruf. I didn't think so either. I'm curious to know what funeral traditions are like for other Muslims. Where you come from, do women stand with the men at the burial of a family member?

Another tradition I'd like to ask about is headscarves at the funeral. Are they an Islamic requirement?

Back home and in the U.S., almost none of the women wear headscarves. A few of the older women still wear them and there's also a very small group of younger women wearing hijab, although I've only seen three of them. The funerals are held in the basement of the mosque and the women and girls wear headscarves during this time and at the burial. They have been--and continue to be--told that they have to. Although a few might have a beige, gray or other non-colorful scarf on, almost all wear white headscarves and they are not supposed to wear any makeup. Many of the women will wear black clothes but no one would be caught dead wearing a black headscarf, and I believe that comes from black headscarves being associated with Christianity.

I personally don't believe that there is any mention of women having to wear headscarves in the verse referring to how women should dress. A woman is required to cover her chest and dress modestly. That's it. And in a society where women never wear them, it seems unnecessary and hypocritical to suddenly show up at a funeral wearing one. When everyone has already seen you dancing all night in your skimpy dresses at the numerous parties and weddings you've attended, what's the point of covering your hair at funerals? Unless there's something somewhere in the Quran that I haven't seen that requires a person's head to be covered during a certain prayer, wearing a headscarf to a funeral makes no sense. The men don't cover their heads with anything. At least Jewish men wear the yamaka.

If wearing a headscarf at a funeral is an Islamic requirement, does the color matter? If it's about covering the hair, does it have to be a scarf? Will a hat do?

I hate headscarves.

Thank you for your reply, Man of Faith, but would you say the Quran condones the marriage of cousins as I've described?

peace,

984 - And do not pray, over any of them who has died - ever - or stand at his grave. Indeed, they disbelieved in Allah and His Messenger and died while they were defiantly disobedient.

this verse talks about not standing/attending in a grave. ponder your questions in this verse.

peace.

This relates to the non-believers, those who were disobedient to the teachings of the prophet. That's it. If that were true, every imam and all those present would be sinning when they say the prayers at every person's burial, which is standard practice among all Muslims.

One of my cousins went to the mosque to have a marriage contract signed by the imam. He took with him his brother and adult sister as witnesses since he was under the impression that two witnesses would suffice. The imam told them that he would have to come back with another male witness or bring two female witnesses, in addition to the one male witness. He told them that based on the Quran, he could not accept one female only as a witness. From that day on, my female cousin no longer considered herself a Muslim. Her exact words, "I want nothing to do with this boy's club."

I can't imagine that there is any truth in this since we all know that there is no evidence that your average man is in any way smarter than your average woman, or that men have superior eyesight or hearing or memory.

I've heard other imams say the same thing. Why would they? And why are Muslims always saying that Islam promotes equality of the genders? Where's the equality in that?

Where I am from, women are told not to get near the grave when a family member is about to be buried. They attend the burial but have to keep their distance. However, after the person (male or female) is buried and the men are done with the prayers and leave, the closest female family members are allowed to quickly go over and throw a bit of dirt over the grave and say their final goodbyes. It all has to be done quickly. The explanation given for women not being near the grave during the burial is that they are more emotional and will end up crying out loud, and their crying may cause some of the men to cry as well. They are told that the tears will not let the dead person rest in peace, so they must keep their distance. However, visiting the grave by women later on appears to be fine, and everyone does it. It just doesn't make sense to me. This too is just one more thing that makes many of the women feel like Islam is a man's religion and we're just observers on the outside looking in.

As far as I know, this is not in the Quran so it must be tradition derived from a hadith somewhere. Does anyone know anything about this? Also, is this a tradition in any of your communities?

Hi everyone. At a recent family gathering there was a discussion regarding who one can and cannot marry according to the Quran. One of the men who regularly attends mosque insisted that per the Quran, one cannot marry a relative, and that would include cousins. Apparently, this is what their imam told them. We are those weird European Muslims who do not marry someone if they are even slightly related. It is considered scandalous and un-Islamic to do so.

I was born into a Sunni Muslim family, although I do not consider myself a Muslim, at least for now. I find it difficult to believe in something that makes me feel like a second-class citizen, somehow inferior to all men. And there are too many contradictions, and too many phrases left open to interpretation. Too many hadith and superstitions that are passed off as "Islam" and too much that just doesn't make sense to me. In just the following verse alone, as a woman I find it offensive that it is directed to men, as if we women were never intended to read the Quran for ourselves. The entire Quran appears to be written to a male audience, with phrases such as "do not marry those women..," "tell your wives..." And many of the translations are just awful. What on earth does "except what has already occurred" really mean??

From 'islamweb.net ' And do not marry those whom your fathers married, except what has already occurred. Indeed, it was an immorality and hateful and was evil as a way. Prohibited to you are your mothers, your daughters, your sisters, your father?s sisters, your mother?s sisters, your brother?s daughters, your sister?s daughters, your mothers who nursed you, your sisters through nursing, your wives? mothers, and your step daughters under your guardianship of your wives unto whom you have gone in. But if you have not gone in unto them, there is no sin upon you. And the wives of your sons who are from your loins, and that you take two sisters simultaneously, except for what has already occurred. Indeed, Allaah is ever Forgiving and Merciful. And married women except those your right hands possess . the decree of Allaah upon you. And lawful to you are beyond these, that you seek them with your property, desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse..."

Anyway, getting back to the original question, although the verse does not state that you should marry your cousins, it does not appear to state that you cannot. Based on just how many Muslims to this day are still encouraged to marry their own cousins, even in the U.S. and England, I'm guessing that the Quran does not prohibit the marriage of cousins and the imams are not discouraging it. For instance, although a man cannot marry his aunts (father's sisters or mother's sisters), it doesn't state that he or his sons cannot marry his aunts' daughters. Am I understanding this correctly? I'd appreciate it if someone can clarify this for me.