Number of wives?
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There's also no verse that prevents women having more than one husband, so you must be a big advocate of that too.
salam
ummmmm yes i understand what you are trying to say, butttttttttt if a man with 4 wives gets them all pregnant......and then you have a female with 4 men and she gets pregnant, you following me here.yes
i personnally beelive that a man is allowed 4 wives and please dont take tht right from us as females. first our salat is taken away now are men. it is our right to pray to god through salat (as a ritual) and it is out right as woman to marry men who are already married, the only problem is men dont want.
tell me when wars happened in the olden days and women were left with no men, are they to be denied companionship for the rest of there lives, are they simply ignored and thrown to the side becuase are husbands died for the cause of god but now we pay the price but living alone till death.i wish more men stood up like real men and married those who have no husbands. men are those who make or break this world, and so far im sorry to say, men have done a great job of breaking. -
salam,
correct me if im wrong , if we are of different religons we will argue over our different faiths, if we are the same religion but different sects we will argue over the hadeeths of differnt men, so now we are of the same faith with one book, and by god you will argue over the different translations. >(There's no harm in arguing on different understandings as long as we agree on the main message (the straight path). The laws of marriage and food have nothing to do with the main message. God have changed them accross the different messengers. Besides, if everything is black and white, what's the meaning of this verse 3918?
angelNOW since this thread is about the number of wives, its very simple god has allowed men up too for wives on a condition he can be fair with all and equal, if not then one, but also he allowed it for the simple reason of that women who are widowed or divorced with children may have a husband and a father figuire. it is not a must that a man marry 4 but if he could then i beleive he should and if i were in a marriage, as a female i would have no problem with it, if god says it ok then who am i to judge and if it will make a family as in mother and children have a father and a husband, again no problem. how can i hate on it they are human as i am after all. peace
This is the problem with the common, traditional understanding of this verse. First of all, being just is not the main condition. It's a secondary condition for those who fulfill the first condition that allows them more than a wife; otherwise, it's a condition for everyone, or rather the duty of everyone even if they have one wife or no wife at all.
The second flawd unerstanding is the second bolded sentence. It's not about widowed women. It's about fatherless children. A child whose father is dead does not lose the father's figure by the death of his father, and it is not a must that every woman has a husband so once her husband dies she can go and snatch any married man. What about other widowers, divorced and single men?! Or simply not marrying if she can't find a husband? What about spinsters? Why don't they have this right?
if he could then i beleive he should and if i were in a marriage, as a female i would have no problem with it, if god says it ok then who am i to judge and if it will make a family as in mother and children have a father and a husband, again no problem. how can i hate on it they are human as i am after all. peace
And this is the result of such erronous understanding resulting from deleting the most important part of the verse and jumping to (then they can marry two's three's and four's) and the cause of so many broken homes and children lost to psychological problems.
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There's no harm in arguing on different understandings as long as we agree on the main message (the straight path). The laws of marriage and food have nothing to do with the main message. God have changed them accross the different messengers. Besides, if everything is black and white, what's the meaning of this verse 3918?
This is the problem with the common, traditional understanding of this verse. First of all, being just is not the main condition. It's a secondary condition for those who fulfill the first condition that allows them more than a wife; otherwise, it's a condition for everyone, or rather the duty of everyone even if they have one wife or no wife at all.
The second flawd unerstanding is the second bolded sentence. It's not about widowed women. It's about fatherless children. A child whose father is dead does not lose the father's figure by the death of his father, and it is not a must that every woman has a husband so once her husband dies she can go and snatch any married man. What about other widowers, divorced and single men?! Or simply not marrying if she can't find a husband? What about spinsters? Why don't they have this right?
And this is the result of such erronous understanding resulting from deleting the most important part of the verse and jumping to (then they can marry two's three's and four's) and the cause of so many broken homes and children lost to psychological problems.
why dont you wake up from your dream world and wake up to reality, all those broken homes or those phycological problems. they are casue becuase of what faith they do not have, you think god does not know what hes talking about .you know how many women divorce becasue there husbands cheat on them do you know how many broken homes and lost children because the men no longer are in love with there wives. thats reality. but if men were allowed to marry again even in the western society, life would be much simpler then what it is today, but then im dreaming because in order to ahve that people would have to have a great deal of faith and that unfortunatley we dont have, yes i am a female and even though i am divorced now, i was married once and i was hoping my ex husband would marry my friend for reasons or other. by the wway whats the count on men and women int his world wasnit it something like 7 to 1 or am i mistaken.
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salam
ummmmm yes i understand what you are trying to say, butttttttttt if a man with 4 wives gets them all pregnant......and then you have a female with 4 men and she gets pregnant, you following me here.yes
i personnally beelive that a man is allowed 4 wives and please dont take tht right from us as females. first our salat is taken away now are men. it is our right to pray to god through salat (as a ritual) and it is out right as woman to marry men who are already married, the only problem is men dont want.
tell me when wars happened in the olden days and women were left with no men, are they to be denied companionship for the rest of there lives, are they simply ignored and thrown to the side becuase are husbands died for the cause of god but now we pay the price but living alone till death.i wish more men stood up like real men and married those who have no husbands. men are those who make or break this world, and so far im sorry to say, men have done a great job of breaking.Obviously, I don't agree with women not being able to pray. And I don't agree with polygamy be it multiple husbands or wives. But there is such a thing as paternity tests, you know. And there is evidence that we were created as monogamous mammals, regardless of our gender. It's in our neurochemistry -
http//nationalzoo.si.edu/Publications/ZooGoer/2004/3/monogamy.cfm
Here in the nucleus accumbens, a brain chemical called dopamine works its magic. It's a gross oversimplification, but for starters, it's not a bad one Dopamine is the feel-good neurotransmitter, flooding the nucleus accumbens during orgasm or any other pleasurable or "rewarding" activity.
Give a vole a dose of cocaine and dopamine is released in its nucleus accumbens. Likewise, let a vole mate for 24 hours, and dopamine is released in its nucleus accumbens. This holds true for every mammal, including humans, in which scientists have studied dopamine levels.
And now here's the trick, the little smackerel of data upon which this whole story hinges Monogamous voles, and every other monogamous mammal scientists have examined, have nucleus accumbens that are absolutely lousy with oxytocin receptors. The presence of these receptors means that when oxytocin is released by that 24-hour bout of mating, the nucleus accumbens can't help but stand up and take notice, neurons ablaze like fireworks on the Fourth of July.
Non-monogomous voles, on the other hand, don't have any oxytocin receptors in their nucleus accumbens. They likely find mating pleasurable, because the feel-good molecule dopamine is dumped all over the feel-good nucleus accumbens. But because they lack the proper receptors, their nucleus accumbens can't "hear" the wailing klaxon of billions of little oxytocin molecules flooding their brains. As a result, montane voles don't associate mating with a specific kind of pleasure with a specific partner. If we could read the montane vole's thoughts, he or she would be thinking "Gee, sex feels great!" Whereas the monogamous prairie vole would be thinking, "Gee, sex with this particular partner feels great!"
In this way, we can imagine that voles, humans, and many other monogamous mammals come to associate a particular partner with reward. Junkies do it too, except they fixate on the drug itself, or paraphernalia associated with the drug.
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Agreed but do you agree with me that this verse is widly abused by muslims.
Peace
Peace,
Of course verses are abused but they will pay for their wrongdoings anyway. And we shall always keep discuss these kind of issues in the society to hopefully make progress.
Maria
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Assalaam Alaikum
The verse in Sura 43 is very clear its NOT referring to number wives its referring to divorce!
The majority of the posts are just reflecting opinion, personal sentiment and interpretation.
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Excellent topic Simple. Unfortunately, (for the Men) the polgamy reference in Sura Nisa 43 is a mistranslation in english and misinterpretation along with a 'lustful' fallacy developed by Men.
Allah makes it clear.....
MARRY THOSE AMONG YOU WHO ARE SINGLE, and the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female. if they are in poverty, Allah will give them means out of His grace. for Allah encompasseth all, and he knoweth all things.
This is so people do not remain unmarried. There is no prohibition against polygyny here.
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Now for those Men who believe they can still practice Polygamy, 'because Muhammad did'
Allah addresses these Men in the following Sura and ayahs....
Wa-ith taqoolu lillathee anAAama Allahu AAalayhi waanAAamta AAalayhi
amsik AAalayka zawjaka waittaqi Allaha / amsik AAalayka zawjaka waittaqi Allaha = Keep your dignity with your wife/mate and have regard for Allahwa tukhfee fee nafsika / and Be aware of your soul;your inner feelings
ma Allahu mubdeehi watakhsha alnnasa waAllahu ahaqqu an takhshahufa lamma qada zaydun minha wataran zawwaj nakaha li-kaa (for YOU) la yakoona AAala almu/mineena harajun fee azwaji adAAiya-ihim itha qadaw minhunna wataran wakana amru Allahi mafAAoolan
Try fitting this understanding of yours with the rest of the verse. Your understanding is way off.
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Obviously, I don't agree with women not being able to pray. And I don't agree with polygamy be it multiple husbands or wives. But there is such a thing as paternity tests, you know. And there is evidence that we were created as monogamous mammals, regardless of our gender. It's in our neurochemistry -
http//nationalzoo.si.edu/Publications/ZooGoer/2004/3/monogamy.cfm
im not asking you to agree with anything this is my view, but explain to me why mohamad had so many wives and dont tell me hes a special case,id he is a prophet dont you tink he should have been the first no to have mulitple wives. or is there a different translation for that too. and by the way i really would like to know where thses translations are coming from because they are ver off of what quran is.
as for animals i beleive they do have mulitple mates or am i wrong in that, sorry im not very good with science -
Any excesses (i.e. polygamy, oppressing women, etc.) that were practiced in regards to females and marriage have now ENDED and those practices should cease.
So now polygamy is being put along side the oppression of women! There are unmarried and widowed women out there, women without family and children, who wouldn't mind being even fifth, sixth or seventh wife of a man. Monogamists deprive women of their needs. THAT'S oppression! THAT'S injustice! Selfish people!
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Peace,
I know I have read somewhere in Quran that the MEN/HUSBANDS are the head of the family. But even that statements from Quran, I think also the women have their responsibility to help and support her husband and work out of home.
In cases of widows, well there is the society who bear the responsibility to help the needy.
I think we women must declare us stronger and not only lean on the men and feel that a marriage is the only solutions for us.
In my opinion I would rather be single and fight for my children's wellbeings than to be a second or third wife.
Maria
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This is so people do not remain unmarried. There is no prohibition against polygyny here.
Assalaam Alaikum @Fahad
If you think rationally and logically regarding Sura 2432, the 'prohibition' you claim is NOT there is actually implied by the 'acceptance' of the ayah by BOTH Males and Females.
MARRY THOSE AMONG YOU WHO ARE SINGLE, and the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female. if they are in poverty, Allah will give them means out of His grace. for Allah encompasseth all, and he knoweth all things.
Fahad, think as I mentioned in previous posts If all Females who are approached by Married Males gave the Men this ayah and vice versa.
Fahad, What is the affect upon the practice of polygamy/polygyny?
By the way I believe the ayah is Mukhamat / governing
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Assalaam Alaikum
Ok Lets just jump to the chase....
I will NOT post the english translation, because EVERYONE I have encountered is wrong.....
Wain khiftum alla tuqsitoo fee alyatama fa inkihoo {MA TABA lakum minna alnnisai mathna wathulatha warubaAAa} fain khiftum alla taAAdiloo fawahidatan aw ma malakat aymanukum thalika adna alla taAAooloo
Wain khiftum alla tuqsitoo fee alyatama fa VERBAL SENTENCE >>> inkihoo ADVERBAL MODIFIERS >>> MA TABA lakum minna <<< GENITIVE >>> alnnisai ADJECTIVES >>> mathna wathulatha warubaAAa <<< fain khiftum alla taAAdiloo fa ADJECTIVE Subject (Al Nisa) >>>> wahidatan <<< aw ma malakat aymanukum thalika adna alla taAAooloo
It is Ma = NOT Taba = good/lawful Lakum =TO/For YOU to be given the Minna = favor/gift/blessing/benefit of Al Nisai = (get married to) Women Mathna = 2, Thulatha = 3, and Rubaa = 4 TIMES
IT IS NOT LAWFUL to divorce get married, divorce get married, divorce get married again and divorce and get married again (and in doing so leave a family behind EACH time!)
'MA taaba la kum MIN an nisa' means 'WHO(MA) seem good to you FROM(MIN) the women'.
The verse is saying And if you fear that you shall not be deal justly with the yatama, so ankihu who seem good to you from the women, twos, threes and fours...
Do you even try to fit your understanding with the rest of the verse? Do you even read what the rest of the verse is says?
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why dont you wake up from your dream world and wake up to reality, all those broken homes or those phycological problems. they are casue becuase of what faith they do not have, you think god does not know what hes talking about .you know how many women divorce becasue there husbands cheat on them do you know how many broken homes and lost children because the men no longer are in love with there wives. thats reality. but if men were allowed to marry again even in the western society, life would be much simpler then what it is today, but then im dreaming because in order to ahve that people would have to have a great deal of faith and that unfortunatley we dont have, yes i am a female and even though i am divorced now, i was married once and i was hoping my ex husband would marry my friend for reasons or other. by the wway whats the count on men and women int his world wasnit it something like 7 to 1 or am i mistaken.
Is this a rational reply to the points I raised in my post?
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Try fitting this understanding of yours with the rest of the verse. Your understanding is way off.
Assalaam Alaikum @Fahad
Fahad, please address the ayah, your personal opinion does NOT take precedence above the Quran.
Wa-ith taqoolu lillathee anAAama Allahu AAalayhi waanAAamta AAalayhi
amsik AAalayka zawjaka waittaqi Allaha / amsik AAalayka zawjaka waittaqi Allaha = Keep your dignity with your wife/mate and have regard for Allahwa tukhfee fee nafsika / and Be aware of your soul;your inner feelings
ma Allahu mubdeehi watakhsha alnnasa waAllahu ahaqqu an takhshahuBeginning of a Verbal Sentence>>>>>
fa / conjunctive particle lamma qada zaydun minha wataran zawwaj nakaha li-kaa (for YOU) la yakoona AAala almu/mineena harajun fee azwaji adAAiya-ihim itha qadaw minhunna wataran wakana amru Allahi mafAAoolan
Fahad, Address the ayah properly and indicate to myself and the readers where my 'understanding is way off'
I await your response regarding the ayah.
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salam muslimthreadrevealed. you persist in misleading people. do you even realize your posts are utterly wrong
you make the false claim that
The verse in Sura 43 is very clear its NOT referring to number wives its referring to divorce!complete utter nonsense. there is no divorce in islam. there is talaq in islam. the word talaq is not present in 43. therefore, you are misleading people and lying.
allah is the truth.
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PEACE,
Please everyone say polygyny
once again please say polygyny
IT was already in a previus post that it was mentioned.... I forget which one. Its a very good thing that we all become educated in this word! I see polygomy written in religious articles! it shows that some people dont look up the words that they speak. I dont look up all the words i speak either but its a good time to start! like Cult,Ideology, Religion, Ritual. and how people use these words against people. I find myself explaining people words so they dont have a bad connotation. And I also see people in this forum having to explain words. Which i learn from at times.
Peace -
So now polygamy is being put along side the oppression of women! There are unmarried and widowed women out there, women without family and children, who wouldn't mind being even fifth, sixth or seventh wife of a man. Monogamists deprive women of their needs. THAT'S oppression! THAT'S injustice! Selfish people!
Assalaam Alaikum @Fahad
Yes, Fahad If you or any other man suggests to a woman that he can 'possess' her as an additional wife EVEN though YOU KNOW that Allah,swt has NOT given you that right....
Yes..YOU are oppressing that Female and Allah does NOT take that lightly
Fahad, Allah,swt did NOT say 'Go Forth and Multiply', thats Bible....
Allah,swt states in the Quran...
O mankind! reverence your Guardian-Lord, who created you from a single soul/ , created of like nature, its mate, and from that soul created countless men and women;- reverence / Allah, through whom you demand your mutual (rights), AND REVERENCE THE WOMBS (AL-Arhama)/ .
for Allah ever watches over you. /Fahad, Allah is indicating in the above ayah, that Women are a 'special creation' from Allah. Thus Allah is instructing the Males to have regard for Allah 'AND' the 'wombs' (AL-Arhama)/ .
We recognize as Muslims ONE entity worthy of worship that is Allah, the same regard and recognition we have for Allah is the same regard and recognition Allah is commanding us to have as it relates to Women, ONE lifetime commitment to ONE Woman, period.
Arhama (noun, plural) wombs;Rahim merciful;Rahima his mercy and love
Dictionary of the Holy Quran page 206 (rahima) -
Peace,
I know I have read somewhere in Quran that the MEN/HUSBANDS are the head of the family. But even that statements from Quran, I think also the women have their responsibility to help and support her husband and work out of home.
In cases of widows, well there is the society who bear the responsibility to help the needy.
I think we women must declare us stronger and not only lean on the men and feel that a marriage is the only solutions for us.
In my opinion I would rather be single and fight for my children's wellbeings than to be a second or third wife.
Maria
salam
i have written 4 responses to your post and i have deleted each and everyone.i can write a book on those few wordds you said and i wont lie to you i wouldnt have of said very nice things because unfortunaltey people are lacking the understanding of what god and his book are all about.
i will say one thing with that response that you posted i guarantee you do not come with the understanding of religion and the idea why we are here. -
'MA taaba la kum MIN an nisa' means 'WHO(MA) seem good to you FROM(MIN) the women'.
The verse is saying And if you fear that you shall not be deal justly with the yatama, so ankihu who seem good to you from the women, twos, threes and fours...
Do you even try to fit your understanding with the rest of the verse? Do you even read what the rest of the verse is says?
Assalaam Alaikum @Fahad...
Wrong! Address the ayah properly as I have taken the time to do....
Wain khiftum alla tuqsitoo fee alyatama fa VERBAL SENTENCE >>> inkihoo ADVERBAL MODIFIERS >>> MA TABA lakum minna <<< GENITIVE >>> alnnisai ADJECTIVES >>> mathna wathulatha warubaAAa <<< fain khiftum alla taAAdiloo fa ADJECTIVE Subject (Al Nisa) >>>> wahidatan <<< aw ma malakat aymanukum thalika adna alla taAAooloo
Ma is a negation Fahad...
Ma Negative particle when placed BEFORE a perfect verb (taba) or BEFORE a pronoun or BEFORE a demonstrative noun. Also used as a negative particle BEFORE a perfect tense among verbal forms.
Dictionary of the Holy Quran page 523-524 (ma)The TWO conditions have been met, the 'Ma' is BEFORE a perfect verb (taba) and BEFORE a perfect tense among a verbal form or sentence (inkihoo denotes the verbal sentence, 'Ma' is the FIRST adverbial modifier of the verbal form or sentence)
I await your 'cogent' response, that addresses the above grammatical references and context.