Hitting kids
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I believe that it should be illegal to beat one's children. A parent who beats their child should at least be beaten the same way they beat their child (545). It would be ridiculous to punish children according to the law in 545 for annoying their parents because children unlike adults aren't smart enough to know the consequences of their actions.
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A parent who beats their child should at least be beaten the same way they beat their child
well then somebody would have to make my mums nose blood, repeatedly punch her in the face.
as a child she once put her whole body weight on me and nothing anyone can do can
compensatefor that.she kicked me as hard as she could, so somebody would have to give her plenty of those.
my granddad hit me really hard all the time (he used to teach me to read arabic and hit me whenever i made mistakes, and i made a bazillion of those), if he had to go through that now he would probably end up disabled.
what makes the whole thing worse is that i am genuinly sensative to pain, if you punched my sister the pain would go away within 5 minutes, if you punched me the physical pain would be there for hours, probably days. being so sensative to pain has been extremly inconvenient.
even as a child when falling down while playing i always had to stop and sit down for a few hours, while others who fell down could usually get up and play as normal.
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i still live with them because i can't afford a place of my own, but we get on better now.
things are very different now, my younger sisters never have to go through this sort of abuse because my parents have changed a lot, they never even get the odd slap.
when I was a younger they genuinly didn't know how to bring up kids, if my younger sisters are naughty they just have their pocket money cut or they're not allowed out to play and have to stay in, but when i was a kid if i was naughty they would hit me however hard they wanted to.
when i was in nursery (age 4-5) to "frighten me" they said that the local delivery man "kidnaps naughty kids" so i had to be
perfect, they may have thought it was funny but saying things like that gave me nightmares for years. They only had to say that i wouldn't get my pocket money to get me to behave like an angel ).the last time i got hit was a few years ago. its not really a problem anymore.
i created this thread because i was curious to see what others thought about hitting kids and if it was condoned in islam.
peace
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Peace,
Respectfully.I still say and i will keep repeating it over and over again - hitting kids is just plain wrong. I strongtly disagree with it and as soon as i have kids - God willing soon - i will neve rhit them nor yell at them. We should always discuss problems with our brains. We should act according to our intelligence and age.
We always say that politicians are idiot - and no one disagrees on that issue - but even they tlak about problems. Needless to say, this is where the hypocrisy come with politicians - they lie and send an army against the opposition.
But kids are defenseless and they will learn violence from the nearest teachers parents. Therefore, hitting kids is wrong. And sinful.
Peace.
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It's really wrong to hit kids especially for minor things. My dad used to hit me with a fly swatter when I was 5-10 years old because I took too long to eat my food, and because I'd fight with my younger sis (even when it was my sis who started it, she said so herself to me). Nowadays I hardly even talk to him unless it's completely necessary, and I don't even feel for him the way I do for my mom and my sis. (My mom used to slap me when I was younger and shouts at me, but never indiscriminately or without good cause.) If you want your kids to fear you, hittin them is definitely the way to go, but it very well might make them emotionally indifferent to you when they're older. (This post isn't addressed to anyone in particular.)
Peace
Sarah -
"Hitting kids" -
I think there is a severe difference, in what is understood by that, by believers or disbelievers.
I have seen some real poor parenting, by a colleague of mine. He's the kind of person, you tell him about dicipline, and that slapping, or hitting a child, can be in some cases, good, or the best way, and he will hit the kid, when you're around, if he's nervous, and the child won't know why, and will just go around being strange. This is not dicipline. This man you cannot tell, that he should hit his child.
If however, a child does an act, repeatedly, that is morally wrong, maybe, hitting is right.
I do not know though, I do not have children of my own. And I would imagine my children to be well-behaved.
Hopefully, I will get to know, InshaAllah ) -
LONDON (AFP) - A mother who bit her five-year-old son in a "revenge" attack because he had hurt his baby sister, was on Tuesday sentenced to five months jail by a court in Gloucestershire.
The 28-year-old single mum, who cannot be named for legal reasons, bit her son on the arm to punish him when she thought he had hurt his eight-month-old baby sister.
Prosecutor Julian Kesner said she had asked the little boy to bring his sister into the bathroom where she was brushing her teeth. Moments later, there was a thud, and the baby began screaming.
"She doesn't know what happened but assumed that he somehow banged her and that she was in much more distress than usual," he said. "It seems at that point she bit her son."
The two bite marks, which each measured more than three centimetres but had not broken the skin, were noticed by staff at the boy's school in Cheltenham who alerted the authorities.
Asked why she did it, the woman said "I don't know. Probably that he hurt his sister, so he's got to be hurt.
"It's an automatic reaction to protect your youngest," she said, saying she felt "really guilty" about the incident.
"At the end of day it's my baby. He's my baby."
In handing down the sentence, Judge Mark Horton said "There can be few offences more likely to cause anger ... than a case of a parent who maliciously and without cause assaults her own child.
"The fact you did so by biting, not simply striking this child, only inflames the circumstances of this offence. It can only be seen as a desire to cause the child pain by way of revenge which caused the bite."
Both of her children have since been taken into care.
http//news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080923/wl_uk_afp/britaincrimechildabuse
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Peace,
wow, that was really fast acting to put her behind bars and take care of her kids.
I know many parents who do worse things to their kids.
I believe violence creates more violence and my opinion about this is that parents who punish their kids with biting or beating is suffer themselves and need help to stop this awful activity.
Maria
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I've fond memories of flying shoes and brooms myself, contact ratio around 31 (maybe my mom should've played some games and improved her reflexes).
salam
maybe thats why i never hit my kids, to busy trying to beat them in nintendo.......... D D D
but on a serious note with 5 kids and somewhat experience, best way to dicipline them is give them all the love and compassion you can and when they are bad kids, the silent treatment will kill them, they will be begging for forgiveness. dont open yourhand all the way but dont shut it either.
i like this sign PEACE, thats cool peace -
Child rearing, specially that of teen-agers need a lot of common sense and patience. What will stop you from hitting your teenage child? Nothing from the Quran I believe. So why are you aghast at physical punishment?
Is there a minimum age for this?
242 The woman and the man guilty of adultery or fornication,- flog each of them with a hundred stripes Let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day and let a party of the Believers witness their punishment.
What if you catch your teenage child making out with somebody?
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Child rearing, specially that of teen-agers need a lot of common sense and patience. What will stop you from hitting your teenage child? Nothing from the Quran I believe. So why are you aghast at physical punishment?
Is there a minimum age for this?
242 The woman and the man guilty of adultery or fornication,- flog each of them with a hundred stripes Let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day and let a party of the Believers witness their punishment.
What if you catch your teenage child making out with somebody?
The same question would be posed to ones "adult child"...
The notion of teenage, is a relatively modern notion (post 1900s).
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salam angel. are you backbiting your parents on this forum?
allah is the truth.
what would i gain from 'backbiting'? especially since no one here knows me in real life.
its only pathalogical liars that believe that others are lying, so try not to judge me from your own pathetically low standards.
anyways i tell them daily that they robbed me off my childhood and teenage years, you don't know what i went through, what i mentioned on the thread is the tip of the iceberg. And nothing they've not heard me complain about before.
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well then somebody would have to make my mums nose blood, repeatedly punch her in the face.
as a child she once put her whole body weight on me and nothing anyone can do can
compensatefor that.she kicked me as hard as she could, so somebody would have to give her plenty of those.
my granddad hit me really hard all the time (he used to teach me to read arabic and hit me whenever i made mistakes, and i made a bazillion of those), if he had to go through that now he would probably end up disabled.
what makes the whole thing worse is that i am genuinly sensative to pain, if you punched my sister the pain would go away within 5 minutes, if you punched me the physical pain would be there for hours, probably days. being so sensative to pain has been extremly inconvenient.
even as a child when falling down while playing i always had to stop and sit down for a few hours, while others who fell down could usually get up and play as normal.
That is all so sad. These things should never happen but unfortunately for you they did. Yes, they will leave an emotional scar, but they cannot be undone now. I pity your mother and grandfather, there is obviously an emotional problem there. But it is a good thing that you can talk about it, there are many people that can't.
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There is a time for a parent to be stern.Being stern does not require violence elektro. Stern and calm gets the best results. You want your kids to listen to you because they love and respect you group, not because they fear you police &.
In a perfect world this is true, but unfortunately there will always be bullies.
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In a perfect world this is true, but unfortunately there will always be bullies.
Of course there will be. We as individuals should try our best not to be bullies. I was bullied and I don't want to pass it to the next generation. Part of being a good parent is not making the mistakes our parents made, and remebering how one felt as a child.
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Of course there will be. We as individuals should try our best not to be bullies. I was bullied and I don't want to pass it to the next generation. Part of being a good parent is not making the mistakes our parents made, and remebering how one felt as a child.
It's good that you have learned. Many people who are abused turn around and do it to their kids. Sad.