underage brides
-
Peace. Why shouldn't a female get married before 18? Do you say that because it's the law? If there was a law that said reading the Quran was illegal, would you agree with that law just because it's the law? In my opinion, males and females should be allowed to marry once they reach puberty. I don't recommend marrying so early, but it should be allowed. Puberty is the dividing point between childhood and the next level. However, forced marriage should never be allowed and that is what is wrong and disgusting.
Peace,
No, it's not because any laws but it would be better if both genders wait and not get married too early.
Of course if someone really wanted earlier they could but I think there had to be some checks up if the marriage really is manageable.Maria
-
Salam,
A female should not get married before the age of 18 because it's her right to finish school and become full grown in her body.
Maria
I have two sisters..22 and 24
both not married yet,,despite the pressure by parents..lol
But Alhamdulilah we live happily together..
Money used to be an issue at my place once..but 4now we can say we are much better..
Allah always tests us..and we shud give the best out of uuNice sun
The rise of lesbianism same sexism with todays women is somewhat evident even here.
I know that a post andropause male marrying a female in menarche, is the best arrangement for the female.
"Her father and her 40-year old husband had disagreed on the dowry to be paid for her marriage and this caused him to tell her daughter to go to court. "
How interesting... who get's the money? The wife or the father?
"Our next step now is to do all that we can to make the minimum marriage age in Yemen 18 years," Shatha told Gulf News.
This is what I call... "war on humanity". What's next, banning births?
-
This happens all the time among the hindus in India.
-
Peace,
No, it's not because any laws but it would be better if both genders wait and not get married too early.
Of course if someone really wanted earlier they could but I think there had to be some checks up if the marriage really is manageable.Maria
That's true. People who get married later and have kids later usually end up having happier marriages.
-
As many who try later... can't have kids later.
Peace,
Not all people wants kids.
-
Mostly those who love to fornicate.
Well that was not good to draw so drastical conclusions of whom wants kids or not.
But I have heard of people who are very independant and likes to travel alot and they want to be free always, they don't want kids.
Maria
-
Mostly those who love to fornicate.
No. I don't want children and I don't have any interest in fornication. I might consider adoption but I'm more partial to opening an orphanage. My only concern in this issue is for the children without families to be raised well.
I agree too in an age limit around 18 or so. My reasoning is based upon the capacity of the girl to birth a child. Infant mortality rates are highest among young mothers. On top of that, marrying girls off upon reaching puberty seems to be treating them like cows or something. I had my first period at 7 and was fully developed by the age of 12, no way would I ever consider myself to be ready for marriage then, much less raising a family. I don't agree with men below the age of 18 getting married either because they moreso have to be financially stable. Therefore, the only eligible person to marry a 12 year old would be someone in his twenties. That makes the situation even more pathetic because he would have to interact with, essentially, a child. It's not paedophilia but I have a hard time taking any man who is attracted to someone so much younger than him seriously. It's different from a 25 year old woman with a 40 year old man, she at least is far more knowledgable than a 12 year old.
Aside from that, I believe in the right of girls to have education and choices. An educated mother will raise educated children. That's what we need more of. I don't want the future to be full of poorly-educated people because these people will also impact MY future.
-
I agree too in an age limit around 18 or so.
Why? Nothing magical happens at age 18. My cousin got married at 14 by her will and she handled it great. Those who can't handle being married at that age shouldn't marry, but those who can should be allowed to. Peace.
-
The problem is deciding between who are truly ready and who are being pressured to do so. 18 is round about the time a person finishes formal education, barring university and as I've said earlier, an educated mother raises educated children. Age limits are set to protect children/young people from being taken advantage of. It is true that people mature differently and exceptions can be made. However, and please don't take this the wrong way, if the law states that only a person above the age of 18 can marry, and a person protests based upon grounds of early maturity, I have to question why they can't be mature enough to wait just a little bit longer. That time can also be used to build up greater resources to better serve the family they will be raising together.
-
The problem is deciding between who are truly ready and who are being pressured to do so. 18 is round about the time a person finishes formal education, barring university and as I've said earlier, an educated mother raises educated children. Age limits are set to protect children/young people from being taken advantage of. It is true that people mature differently and exceptions can be made. However, and please don't take this the wrong way, if the law states that only a person above the age of 18 can marry, and a person protests based upon grounds of early maturity, I have to question why they can't be mature enough to wait just a little bit longer. That time can also be used to build up greater resources to better serve the family they will be raising together.
You're not offending me or anything like that. You do make a good point.
-
No. I don't want children and I don't have any interest in fornication. I might consider adoption but I'm more partial to opening an orphanage. My only concern in this issue is for the children without families to be raised well.
I agree too in an age limit around 18 or so. My reasoning is based upon the capacity of the girl to birth a child. Infant mortality rates are highest among young mothers. On top of that, marrying girls off upon reaching puberty seems to be treating them like cows or something. I had my first period at 7 and was fully developed by the age of 12, no way would I ever consider myself to be ready for marriage then, much less raising a family. I don't agree with men below the age of 18 getting married either because they moreso have to be financially stable. Therefore, the only eligible person to marry a 12 year old would be someone in his twenties. That makes the situation even more pathetic because he would have to interact with, essentially, a child. It's not paedophilia but I have a hard time taking any man who is attracted to someone so much younger than him seriously. It's different from a 25 year old woman with a 40 year old man, she at least is far more knowledgable than a 12 year old.
Aside from that, I believe in the right of girls to have education and choices. An educated mother will raise educated children. That's what we need more of. I don't want the future to be full of poorly-educated people because these people will also impact MY future.
You want to keep an orphanage? I thought marriage was created for those who worried about orphans.
As for this age limit, where did it come from? I'm sure it didn't come from any research you did.
Here's what my research gives. Menarchical female with post andropausal male. If the female has developed into the adolescent age, then with other adolescents.
No man needs to be attracted to such a young female, the females of the parents push the relationship through (if the female has no complaints about it, and the male does not have any complaints). Normally parents would seek out a male that has wealth and good experience with his other wives.
Education comes from teaching. I've learnt more from lecturing other people than from sitting in a school being told to conform to society's desires. And a woman's sustinance for learning is the responsibility of firstly her husban(who would technically be the closest male to her).
As for women being too young, the sign is sexual desire...
-
I empathise with orphans, so I want to do the right thing simply because it is the right thing to do.
Like I said, the age of 18 is normally when a person finishes formal education before being sent off to the university. This applies to most developed countries, you only need to read up on education systems for that. Also, I said around 18, I didn't say exactly 18.
There is no sanctioned research on the 'eligibility of marriage' which is why I say that there obviously can be exceptions. However if the law itself, which was created to protect young women, states that one can only marry at a certain age, it should be obeyed failing which one just shows the lack of maturity regarding the matter. The age of marriage for Muslims here is 16, do I want to contest that? No. If they are younger and if the families are agreeable it is also allowed though it is not encouraged. This is because, as shown by research done in my country, underaged brides are more likely to divorce and raise latchkey kids than those who were more mature when they got married. 'Desire' is no barometer for readiness.
And a woman's sustinance for learning is the responsibility of firstly her husban Where do you get that? It's highly unlikely that I will get married and I am responsible for my own learning. What, women are too dumb to think for themselves?
In some other thread, you brought up Andrea Dworkin, I'm suprised that you read Dworkin, agree with her, but still subscribe to a partriarchal model.
-
-
Salam,
A female should not get married before the age of 18 because it's her right to finish school and become full grown in her body.
Maria
Agreed unless she wants too.
-
I empathise with orphans, so I want to do the right thing simply because it is the right thing to do.
Like I said, the age of 18 is normally when a person finishes formal education before being sent off to the university. This applies to most developed countries, you only need to read up on education systems for that. Also, I said around 18, I didn't say exactly 18.
There is no sanctioned research on the 'eligibility of marriage' which is why I say that there obviously can be exceptions. However if the law itself, which was created to protect young women, states that one can only marry at a certain age, it should be obeyed failing which one just shows the lack of maturity regarding the matter. The age of marriage for Muslims here is 16, do I want to contest that? No. If they are younger and if the families are agreeable it is also allowed though it is not encouraged. This is because, as shown by research done in my country, underaged brides are more likely to divorce and raise latchkey kids than those who were more mature when they got married. 'Desire' is no barometer for readiness.
And a woman's sustinance for learning is the responsibility of firstly her husban Where do you get that? It's highly unlikely that I will get married and I am responsible for my own learning. What, women are too dumb to think for themselves?
In some other thread, you brought up Andrea Dworkin, I'm suprised that you read Dworkin, agree with her, but still subscribe to a partriarchal model.
In your country? How about we do one for history? Or even one for the latchkey kids of older mothers for here in the UK, or of other secular countries?
Poorly trained kids only come from poorly trained mothers and young males that are married to these young females.
Not to mention that they the parents who normally give their young daughters away are poor themselves.
Most divorces are not caused only by poor training, but by poor choice of partners, quick marriages for "family" reasons. But even after that there is always the factor of modern sythetic consuption, kinda like the Roman lead consuption.According to Kaussar, (2005). The most important reason that is attributed to the problem of divorce among Muslims is the ignorance of the type of relationship that Islam envisages for married couples
3. So, not understanding of Islam and weakness of faith played a major role in increasing the percentage of divorce in the society. Therefore, not abiding by the Islamic teachings and the deep ignorance of the Islamic instructions by the married couples lead to divorce. Furthermore, neglecting the tradition, values and moral in exchange for modernity exacerbate the problem.-Causes and remedies of high divorce rate in Malaysia
Don't forget that divorce is allowed thanks to the Quran, it's not the same as for the Bible believers.
However, under the Islamic Family Law (Federal Territories) Act 1984, it also allows girls younger then the legal age to marry under special conditions (such as unplanned pregancies)
Desire is a psychological reason for that female to be separated from her brothers (incest that's why) and be taught about marriage and post andropausal partner seeked, then when that females enters into menarche she's read to be a mother. Why wait for "unplanned pregancies". Such a method would be the best solution for young females in the UK and the rest of the world.
The current UN model is anti-evolutionary. As it promotes women to avoid becomming pregnant. In the history of humanity, women have never been in such a state as today where the female chooses to avoid pregnancies. Ask any working woman.
As for most developed countries, look at their economies... you call that developed? Look at the work force, practically slavery. And when it comes to education, homeschooling can solve that equation as well. Not only can it solve young mothers, it's better than going to school. I don't get how stupid anyone can be sending their kids to a concentration camp because they call it "school".
You remove schools, synthetic consumption, and then you're left with something a little natural with the application of the above model (rather than your UN model) which satisfies quran 46.