self-control from indecent activities
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Peace justamuslim. Thanks for taking the time to answer so thoroughly.
Smoking is an interesting one...it always surprises me the number of people I see that give up whether just using their will power or using patches/gum, but don't change their behaviours. The way you socialise and who you socialise with counts for a lot imho. I have seen a lot of people fail and I'm fairly sure they'd have had better chance if they'd combined attacking the physical addiction aspect with things such as socialising with different people (non-smokers) and socialising in different settings. Sometimes smokers are so used to sitting down for a coffee with a cigerette in their hand that it can help to change the smaller things too - stop doing the things you normally do when smoking and it can help to break the cycle.
I think you are right about reasons underlying smoking and many other problems being multitudinous. Unfortunately it makes it harder to plan the attack.
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aoa guys,
what is the best way to control oneself from committing actions one commits without wanting to and then feels guilty about doing that (asks repentance and makes a promise with Allah that he/she will not commit the action again but it happens again and again).
thanks in advance )
My first guess? Remembrance of Allah.
If a person has to prostrate themselves and recite Qu'ran nonstop for several whole days to keep from committing this act, then that is what they have to do. If it doesn't take that much, then they are fortunate to have superior self-control.
Here are some verses
Recite what is sent of the Book by inspiration to thee and establish Regular Prayer for Prayer restrains from shameful and unjust deeds; and remembrance of Allah is the greatest (thing in life) without doubt. And Allah knows the (deeds) that ye do. 2945
Recite what is sent of the Book by inspiration to thee and establish Regular Prayer for Prayer restrains from shameful and unjust deeds; and remembrance of Allah is the greatest (thing in life) without doubt. And Allah knows the (deeds) that ye do. 2945
Those who fear Allah when a thought of evil from satan assaults them bring Allah to remembrance when lo! they see (aright)! 7201
O ye who believe! when ye meet a force be firm and call Allah in remembrance much (and often); that ye may prosper. 845
I hope this helps in some way!
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Thanks for all the responses guys, much appreciated.
For all of you wondering what the problem is, it's related to homosexuality (getting turned on by gay porn etc - haven't had gay sex yet and never plan too). I am heterosexual and I know it but I guess I am going through a phase. I have decided to put an end to this by staying away from activities that may attract me to such activities. I also believe getting closer to Allah will help me battle what I am going through at the moment.
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For all of you wondering what the problem is, it's related to homosexuality (getting turned on by gay porn etc - haven't had gay sex yet and never plan too).
Did it again ... got a guy to wank me off and kissed for 2 secs .. whats happening to me? I kno i m not gay cus I dont attracted to guys but when i wrestle then all of this happens. GOnna stop wrestling ... GOD HELP ME PLEASE!
Please stop trolling the forum.
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I was about to mention the fact that he seems to be asking whether he should get married in another thread - while here he is telling us about his issues with gay porn....then I saw your post. Thank you savage_carrot.
And he would have got away with it, if it weren't for you meddling kids!
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cyrus,
i am glad that you have made the choice to stop watching porn (gay or otherwise). satan has vowed to stray people away and if you listen to and are influenced by satan, it is your soul that suffers taking you down a path of darkness, distress and disease in this life and in the life hereafter. if you find yourself pulled in the direction of engaging in the activity (and it is going to happen), seek God! grab the koran. depending on where you are living, there are professionals who can help you. do whatever it takes, and don't feel embarrassed in wanting to get help and getting better.
pornography is a problem in the muslim community - one of the reasons for divorce in the united states. yet, not addressed by the community.
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cyrus,
i am glad that you have made the choice to stop watching porn (gay or otherwise). satan has vowed to stray people away and if you listen to and are influenced by satan, it is your soul that suffers taking you down a path of darkness, distress and disease in this life and in the life hereafter. if you find yourself pulled in the direction of engaging in the activity (and it is going to happen), seek God! grab the koran. depending on where you are living, there are professionals who can help you. do whatever it takes, and don't feel embarrassed in wanting to get help and getting better.
pornography is a problem in the muslim community - one of the reasons for divorce in the united states. yet, not addressed by the community.
Pornography is a problem in every society that has access to it I believe. I feel really sad for those growing up today because I think the expectations in that area, due to pornography, are so vastly different from what was intended. I'm not suggesting prudishness by any means but it's a jungle out there for the young. Just my opionion admittedly.
justamuslim I think it's been established (sadly) that cyrus was a troll. )
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rana,
in reading cyrus past posts, seems he has been struggling with homosexuality for sometime now. he could be just a troll but then again, there are people out there like cyrus who are struggling with issues like homosexuality. the topic that he brings up is real.
i am sure pornography is worldwide. but i don't know of studies done outside looking at social issues. the number of marriages that end in divorce amongst muslim in united states has been on the rise and people started looking into it finding that - infidelity and pornography were one of the reasons.
sex has sadly been reduced to that of an animal having sex without love, commitment, monogamy, strengthening the bond between two people, feeling peaceful.
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he could be just a troll but then again, there are people out there like cyrus who are struggling with issues like homosexuality. the topic that he brings up is real.
@ justamuslim you're right - the topic is real. He did appear to be a troll but if he wasn't (or isn't) then I do hope he considers leaving the possibility of marriage to another time, for the woman's sake, so he can be sure he isn't just using her in order to present in a heterosexual light or because he wants to have children and the kind of supportive partner that maybe he feels he couldn't have if he has relationships with men. I've seen it happen and it's really destructive and sad when the woman involved is unaware and thinks she is getting a real marriage, real husband, real life with someone. I'm not saying that his issues are unimportant, I'm just hoping that he doesn't drag someone else into them unknowingly because it's not just.
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rana,
totally agree! i know people who hurt their spouses and spouses who were hurt. if cyrus thinks getting a girlfriend or marrying is the solution, it is not. this is something that he needs to figure out for himself before hurting a whole lot of people.