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  4. What is FEMINISM? Is feminism an insult word?

What is FEMINISM? Is feminism an insult word?

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  • U Offline
    U Offline
    unknownuser
    wrote on last edited by
    #30

    I am really tired of you saying 665 is commandment for wives to be submissive and obedient to their husbands.
    What about husbands? They can command their wives to do everything they want their wives to but their wives should not command and just simply be obedient? What kind of apartheid is this?

    Since when qanit=dutifull.You exactly don't know anyting what is the meaning of " true obedient".You keep say term like 'Salafist" or something which made me confused.Indeed you're Quranist but influenced by a stereotype.

    The term obedient and worshipp is different.I live in a village, "obedient wife" is still part of my culture and most of them have a harmonic families ya know, not as like "Salafist" as you think.

    I speaking about fact, not just by baseless stereotype theories.
    You will understand bout this if you already became a wife soon ).

    Anyways, I am not from the US. If you read in wikipedia or any other websites on education systems by countries,
    there are also some other countries that have merit/demerit system, national exams in November. I have Islamic (Sunni-based) subject at school. Muslim girls are forced to wear boring headscarves but Muslims guys and non-Muslim guys are not permitted to keep facial hair / beards.
    As for my youtube channel, I don't like to communicate with the people in my country. Many of them suck, they like to bash Shia but their own sect is worse in some aspects. Salafism is rising in my country.

    I study international politics, even just only one semester.I know how salafist risen and extreme salafist mostly risen in a place with lack of internet freedom.So impossible if you're been there.

    By looking your attitude and speak pattern, I believe you're a native english speaker.I know US educational system not from the internet, but a dvd video talking about it.
    Thus I already been in youtube since 2007-8, so I know correctly if youtubers mostly use their native languages rather than english.

    Btw I ever seen how a criminal court works.Mostly defendants who answer something not to the straight point and make refutation are lying and you're like them, someone ask from where you're came from then your answer is puzzling.

    Why you afraid show your real country?? As long as you not show ur identity and face you're safe.I need someone who came from another countries, so we can share experiences each other.

    NOTESalafist+Sunni majority+English speaking=This country doen't exist.

    Peace

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      diamantinehoneybunch
      wrote on last edited by
      #31

      Okay so I can conclude that your interpretation of the verse is as follow.

      665 It may be that he would divorce you, then his Lord will substitute other wives in your place who are better than you; submitting their husbands, believing, obedient to their husbands repentant to God, worshipping God , devout towards God, mature and youthful.

      You didn't answer my question. Why must wives be obedient to husbands but not the husbands? This is male-dominated culture that 'Saint' Paul preached.

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        unknownuser
        wrote on last edited by
        #32

        You didn't answer my question. Why must wives be obedient to husbands but not the husbands? This is male-dominated culture that 'Saint' Paul preached.

        RED rotfl

        I told you to read my post correctly.Wife must have "postive" obedient with the husband and the exchange the husband must fill the wife's need, like give them money, pay their mahr, protecting her.
        There is no so called gender-dominance.I just try give better postion for what is position of wife and husband in the correct ways.

        You use circular reasoning against me.I already said if my arguments has nothing to do with Paul's letter and I don't believe on all Paul's contradicted letters.

        Ok my post will not connect to you if you still influenced by that so called "Salafist stereotype".

        665 It may be that he would divorce you, then his Lord will substitute other wives in your place who are better than you; submitting their husbands, believing, obedient to their husbands repentant to God, worshipping God , devout towards God, mature and youthful.

        You must understand Quran terminology first.

        -Female submitte=muslimat.Most of muslim knows if muslim means submitted to God not husband.
        -Repentant in Arabic called taubat or nadam, and indeed if you read all verses in the Koran, then you will know what means repentant is repentant to God.
        Repentant to husband?? it's strange to me, because a husband cannot give a salvation.

        What I mean of pleonasm is the term "obedient to God" already used by four words in verse 665, and why God used another word again (qaanit) for same cause??

        And what is the difference of muslim (submitt) and obedient (qaanit), so the God written that two terms with separate words??

        CHeers

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          huruf
          wrote on last edited by
          #33

          The term nisaa is more used for wives, ex nisaa' al-nabiyi (appeared in many verses).Please read this verse completly.

          Btw the word muslimat, mu'minat and taubat is enough for the "obedient to God" in 665.If we tafseer qanit in 665 as obedient to God also, then it will be a pleonasm.

          You made generalization to hasty.Who cares to St Paul anyways? D

          Carefree wive indeed is not Abrahamic culture and this post already answered by your last post which have similiar point with mine.

          Why someone like yu and Yuliana didn't read my post properly, this because both of you pursue your own emotional subjective, so both of u accuse me for nothing.

          Indeed I never hate woman at all and look down woman, but I try to give proper position for what is the meaning of wife??
          In my culture, there is a motto "Wanita harus dihargai" (Woman must be valued).We have a heroine named Raden Ajeng Kartini, a symbol of woman emancipation.

          Peace

          So earthdom, according to you, God cannot ever speak about men and women in the Qur'an aithout it meaning husbands and weives. You are forbidding God to say anything about women or men. Rijaal is nto husband never, so why the opposite of rijaal in that aya would be wives. Whom are playing with.

          It is shocking when men start to feel good about themselves and to have found a trick to circumvent clear words of God they get bold and try to push down other people's throats their won arrangments of what God MUST say. -rijaal continue to be rijaal but women become unfailingly wives. Please, please, please and they you top it call saying that we pursue our own emotional value. What yous ay is insulting and besides, what do you pursue when you trick with the Qur'ans words, your own hormonal value? could be?

          And that "your own emotional value" betrays you very much. So women must not be listened to because when they say something we do not like to hear they pursue their own emotional value. Good. They do that, and on top of that, "their own emotional value" to those loving husbands (I suppose since women are always wives that men are always husbands) is absolutely undeserving of any consideration at all. Talking about being n ice to the wives (wives the only thing women can be, earthdom's word).

          Don't you realise how out of reality you can get when you superimpose fairytales to the Qur'an and to real life? Your wives in those worlds you deppict where everybody is so fantastically happy must be laughinh out loud at their men on their backs, my God. They must be so easily manipulated with thos efantastic ideas about their place and merits in the world...

          Salaam

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            huruf
            wrote on last edited by
            #34

            Earthdom, I am worried about you. What have you smoked? Are you a prophet of the same category as Muhammad? What have you blabbered in that post about 66.5? Are you out of your mind? Can you imagine khatam annabiyin writing what to me is absolute nonsense that you have poured in your lasts posts? Wake up man, all men are not prophets just as all men are not firw3awn. If you start that we all will be authorized to treat to like criminals should be treated, bcause in the Qur'an there are also criminal men being addressed.

            Really worried about you.

            Salaam

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            • U Offline
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              unknownuser
              wrote on last edited by
              #35

              So earthdom, according to you, God cannot ever speak about men and women in the Qur'an aithout it meaning husbands and weives. You are forbidding God to say anything about women or men. Rijaal is nto husband never, so why the opposite of rijaal in that aya would be wives. Whom are playing with.

              If rijaal and nisaa' is not about husband and wive, then what about nusyuj, and what about separate from the madza'?? Of course this is about couple relationship.

              It is shocking when men start to feel good about themselves and to have found a trick to circumvent clear words of God they get bold and try to push down other people's throats their won arrangments of what God MUST say. -rijaal continue to be rijaal but women become unfailingly wives. Please, please, please and they you top it call saying that we pursue our own emotional value. What yous ay is insulting and besides, what do you pursue when you trick with the Qur'ans words, your own hormonal value? could be?

              And I more confused for what hormonal value do you mean??Emotional value??

              This is the best intepretation for 443 I have, and I hope you do not believe what s**t orientalist views regarding to Islam.
              You must learn about "obedient" not by strange prespective.I don't know for why both of you two, when I said "obediend to husband" then you have negative atmosphere.

              Yeah maybe you see "obedient" by looking Middle eastern libidoic culture like hareem etc, forced slave.No I don't meant that like that.

              Obedient in our society is Obedient but independence, independence but do not forget her status as her wive.

              I still remember if you live in Spain, now to understand the meaning of "true obedient" please stusy about southeast or eastern asian culture, just not by libidoic ulama's daily life.

              Earthdom, I am worried about you. What have you smoked? Are you a prophet of the same category as Muhammad? What have you blabbered in that post about 66.5? Are you out of your mind? Can you imagine khatam annabiyin writing what to me is absolute nonsense that you have poured in your lasts posts? Wake up man, all men are not prophets just as all men are not firw3awn. If you start that we all will be authorized to treat to like criminals should be treated, bcause in the Qur'an there are also criminal men being addressed.

              This is what I smoke usually

              http//www.indonesian-cigarettes.com/image/cache/data/Gudang%20Garam/gudang_garam_surya12-2-350x350.jpg

              http//www.cigarettespub.net/gallery/default/original/24178/2.jpg?1340006443

              Indeed our main problem in discussion is the differences in culture.I live in South Eastern hermisphere, you in Spain.Then how, how we must got the point.
              Beside that I don't know Spain's culture, is "obedient wive" is something negative in there??

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                learning_truth81
                wrote on last edited by
                #36

                Earthdom, I am worried about you. What have you smoked? Are you a prophet of the same category as Muhammad? What have you blabbered in that post about 66.5? Are you out of your mind? Can you imagine khatam annabiyin writing what to me is absolute nonsense that you have poured in your lasts posts? Wake up man, all men are not prophets just as all men are not firw3awn. If you start that we all will be authorized to treat to like criminals should be treated, bcause in the Qur'an there are also criminal men being addressed.

                Really worried about you.

                Salaam

                From your posts I can clearly see you have some seriously big hangups and disdain for men. It's totally clear. I really don't think I would like to know you, you are not much better than men who love to talk badly about women. i know men like that, and your tone isn't so different. You also come with some crazy sweeping assumptions and misconstrue people's posts without grasping a single thing of what is actually being said to you.

                Eartdom hasn't actually said anything that is all that wrong to be honest. I grasped what he is trying to say and anyone with a sound mind could understand his reasoning. He's not giving the old boys club this and boys club that, or telling people to obey men instead of god, you take everything out of context.

                Obeying the husband does not mean you are not obeying god. it's not one of the other. What is the opposite of obey? to not obey? defiance, rebel, ignore? Has god said then, to do the opposite? which includes these things? No i think you will find not. So there is nothing unislamic to obey the husband. A lot of good would come out of that surely? If the husband is attentive the the wife's needs and respects her and he is reasonable in how he treats her, then what is the problem with that?

                We can look at historical context too, and where would you find, even pre Quran in Abrahamic times, the wife not obeying the husband? Quran has not invented a religion remember that, it is reinforcing what true monotheism was at one point in time.

                Tell me then, how much the wife, behave in a relationship? please explain what is your understanding of the role of the wife in Islam? If it is to defy, ignore, rebel, then how do you expect the husband then to listen to, or tend to the wife's needs or support her if she is too busy living for herself? No point being in a marriage then is there???

                Both Husband and wife have a duty towards each other to tend to and fulfill each other's needs. That can only happen if there is mutual respect and the wife does have to obey the husband, without any level of obedience what is there???? Nothing! just two people living separate lives which together? Is that a marriage?

                Then also when kids come in to the equation you going to tell me that the husband is not to be the dominant figure in the upbringing of the child? The male has always been the disciplinarian because men and women have different traits, strengths and weaknesses. Also how does a child respect the father, if the mother is boss? or the mother is calling the shots? Again, your argument becomes so simplistic and takes the context away and you are in a wishy washy liberal new age thinking.

                If you claim to follow the guidance and do right by god, then you need to do as muslims, monotheists have done through the ages. Was it ever taught that women do not and should not obey the husband? Find me proof of this, that women were ever in a position to defy the husband? As long as the husband is not abusing his power, he does have a right to establish some order and set some ground rules. The wife too can have input and both should work together to create a harmonious atmosphere and love, understanding and respect would flourish. Not all this talk of defiance and non obedience.

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                  huruf
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #37

                  Do not exert yourself, earthdom, I know exactly what you mean by obedient you mean anything, whatever, but it must be called obedient when we are speaking about women, because otherwise the men will suffer unsufferably in their male egos. So let it be whatever, does not matter, provided you call it obedient. Any man needs an "obedient-wife" in his life in order to feel he is somebody even if she does not obey.

                  I understand it, earthdom. It is not in the Qur'an and you and I fear you have not read many things that have been written in threads in which you participaed. Those question you pose have already been answered ad nauseam, too bad you do not remember or you do not like to remember or want to forget. You can always look for them. At any rate, so, according to you when it is spoken about nushuz and the suject is a woman it means obedience, and it does not mean obedience when the subject is a man? I sthat it?

                  The madaji3 are not the beds, but the lohabitual lodgement of anybody as is shown by other ayas of the Qur'an. And what is more, men (be they husbands or be they nightguards or escapists or ironmongers) are not told to do anything either about the wives or the women except be their supporters.

                  The aya is not addresed to them or to the women, it is addressed to the community. The community of believers is addressed explicitly in aya 28 and since them the addresse has not chnaged nor changes in the next ayas. So not the men nor the husbands are being told to do anything whatsoever as to those from whon nushuz is feared, but the community of believing men and women is told to do such and such. The men do nothing and God commands them nothing as such men, but it is the community of the believers that is told to warn, let women alone in their homes or make them aware of the situation.

                  Man, Earthdom, after all the time you have been in the forum and asked so much an intervened so much, it really puzzles me where you have got up to.
                  How comforting to be able to extract by hook or crook something out of the Qur'an that puts you on the top of the sex pyramid. They must be very right those who speak about the erotics of power.

                  As far as I am concerned I am hard up to feel anything but comtempt for those males who need to feel that they are over women or need their obedience, according to you token obedience. It is really not serious y denotes a lack of self-confidence of trust in God and in their own ability to be loved that really makes them pitiful. No man in his senses would want to be obeyed by his wife, an adult like himself, a companion, respected and loved yes. Obeyed? Marriage is like the army? Seems utterly pitiful. Men who are really deserving of respect do not have those stupid delusions, they would hate to be treated like that by their faithful companions. Do we want to be obeyed by friends? Is a wife less of a comrade and a friend.

                  Very, very, very shocking indeed.

                  Salaam

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                    huruf
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #38

                    From your posts I can clearly see you have some seriously big hangups and disdain for men. It's totally clear. I really don't think I would like to know you, you are not much better than men who love to talk badly about women. i know men like that, and your tone isn't so different. You also come with some crazy sweeping assumptions and misconstrue people's posts without grasping a single thing of what is actually being said to you.

                    Eartdom hasn't actually said anything that is all that wrong to be honest. I grasped what he is trying to say and anyone with a sound mind could understand his reasoning. He's not giving the old boys club this and boys club that, or telling people to obey men instead of god, you take everything out of context.

                    Obeying the husband does not mean you are not obeying god. it's not one of the other. What is the opposite of obey? to not obey? defiance, rebel, ignore? Has god said then, to do the opposite? which includes these things? No i think you will find not. So there is nothing unislamic to obey the husband. A lot of good would come out of that surely? If the husband is attentive the the wife's needs and respects her and he is reasonable in how he treats her, then what is the problem with that?

                    We can look at historical context too, and where would you find, even pre Quran in Abrahamic times, the wife not obeying the husband? Quran has not invented a religion remember that, it is reinforcing what true monotheism was at one point in time.

                    Tell me then, how much the wife, behave in a relationship? please explain what is your understanding of the role of the wife in Islam? If it is to defy, ignore, rebel, then how do you expect the husband then to listen to, or tend to the wife's needs or support her if she is too busy living for herself? No point being in a marriage then is there???

                    Both Husband and wife have a duty towards each other to tend to and fulfill each other's needs. That can only happen if there is mutual respect and the wife does have to obey the husband, without any level of obedience what is there???? Nothing! just two people living separate lives which together? Is that a marriage?

                    Then also when kids come in to the equation you going to tell me that the husband is not to be the dominant figure in the upbringing of the child? The male has always been the disciplinarian because men and women have different traits, strengths and weaknesses. Also how does a child respect the father, if the mother is boss? or the mother is calling the shots? Again, your argument becomes so simplistic and takes the context away and you are in a wishy washy liberal new age thinking.

                    If you claim to follow the guidance and do right by god, then you need to do as muslims, monotheists have done through the ages. Was it ever taught that women do not and should not obey the husband? Find me proof of this, that women were ever in a position to defy the husband? As long as the husband is not abusing his power, he does have a right to establish some order and set some ground rules. The wife too can have input and both should work together to create a harmonious atmosphere and love, understanding and respect would flourish. Not all this talk of defiance and non obedience.

                    At your orders, my general, Sir.

                    Salaam

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                      diamantinehoneybunch
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #39

                      I hate it when only women are to be 'obedient' to husbands but not the husbands because, yeah, husbands are just like the big boss to the wives. Husband commands, wife obeys yeah wtf

                      I agree with relationship in marriage = mutual partnership.

                      Huruf is not being over-feminist. I think she just does not agree with 'obedient' is only a must for a wife to her husband but the husband is nothing but a commander. By saying this I am not looking in conservative 'obedience' perspective but moderate perspective too.

                      By disagreeing with 'obedience' doesn't mean I agree with husband-beating or rebellious wives. Neither husbands nor wives should be submissive to their spouses and neither wives nor husbands should be 'commanders' to their spouses. A husband and a wife are just like special friends and soulmates who are legal to have intimacy together.

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                        learning_truth81
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #40

                        At your orders, my general, Sir.

                        Salaam

                        But seriously answer this question for me.

                        if the wife is not to obey then does she disobey since you say God does not command the wife to obey the husband. Does God command the wife to disobey the husband? If it's not to obey then it's got to be the opposite? she either obeys or doesn't. If she doesn't can you honestly say that Islam approves of such a way??

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                          diamantinehoneybunch
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #41

                          But seriously answer this question for me.

                          if the wife is not to obey then does she disobey since you say God does not command the wife to obey the husband. Does God command the wife to disobey the husband? If it's not to obey then it's got to be the opposite? she either obeys or doesn't. If she doesn't can you honestly say that Islam approves of such a way??

                          Read my post at #38 please.

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                            huruf
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #42

                            Does God command to disobey the wife?

                            You are not speaking about Qur'an. I do not recognize eanything of it in your words and I doubt very much that you know a damned thing about it. In fact I think you are a troll and you are doing the job of hardcore mysiginists in orde to make appear that Islam is all about keeping women in their place. I am not interested in answering your whims and campaign to discredit islam nor the word of God in the honoured Qur'an. In your posts you have shown not to have the slightest idea of the Qur'an, you have always tried to push your own purported ideas as something out of th Qur'an, which not even remotely.

                            I think you might do a better job, my general, if you took some time to updat Mein Kampf. Excuse me but I find your posts, from the point of view of anybody who may have had some familiarity with the Qur'an, as completely ignorant.

                            Salaam

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                              Man_of_Faith
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #43

                              Salaam,

                              So it is 434 being used against women again. People interpret it like the man is a boss over women while it more means like protector and provider and Qur'an was primarily aimed at an audience over 1400 years ago when the world was more unprotected than it is today. It does not by any rate mean that the man is the boss and woman is subordinate. Why is the man more anatomically massive than the woman for? To be oppressive towards their woman? No to be warriors and taking the worst beating in a conflict to defend the wife and family and go out to hunt for the family. This is basically what 434 means about responsibility.

                              Apart from this the relationship between man and woman is to give tranquility to both and that we complement each other as both have strengths needed by both. A man without a woman is no man and vice versa.

                              God bless you

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                                learning_truth81
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #44

                                I hate it when only women are to be 'obedient' to husbands but not the husbands because, yeah, husbands are just like the big boss to the wives. Husband commands, wife obeys yeah wtf

                                I agree with relationship in marriage = mutual partnership.

                                Huruf is not being over-feminist. I think she just does not agree with 'obedient' is only a must for a wife to her husband but the husband is nothing but a commander. By saying this I am not looking in conservative 'obedience' perspective but moderate perspective too.

                                By disagreeing with 'obedience' doesn't mean I agree with husband-beating or rebellious wives. Neither husbands nor wives should be submissive to their spouses and neither wives nor husbands should be 'commanders' to their spouses. A husband and a wife are just like special friends and soulmates who are legal to have intimacy together.

                                I know where you are coming from, and agree to some extent, but you know what, more often than not, somebody has to lead. We see this in every aspect of life, in the work place, the head of a country, the captain on the field in a football team, generals, commanders, etc. I don't think you can avoid this. Someone HAS to lead. That doesn't mean to say the person who leads is some kind of supreme overlord, far from it! A just leader listens, shows respect, compassion etc.

                                Obedience to the husband does not mean being inferior. It means that she respects the husband and in doing that, the husband will respect the wife too. I'm sure you can see that? It's not a bad thing. If you understand that word in it's purest form.

                                Surely you can also see if the wife does not obey the husband, then how is he supposed to care for her? If shes too busy not listening and living for herself and making her own decisions. There needs to be a level of obedience. Especially in a family, if Wife does not obey and respect the husband then neither will the children. Then you create a negative atmosphere and cause instability in the household.

                                Speaking generally if we talking just men and women, outside of a marriage, in other aspects of life, men will sometimes have to obey a woman if she's his boss for example, so you have to look at the context and situation. Mutual respect and understanding will be of benefit, obedience is not a bad word, sometimes in order to make things work we must be obedient. it isn't always about the self, ego etc. We should look first for the good of the situation that we are in, what will make that work.

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                                  learning_truth81
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #45

                                  Does God command to disobey the wife?

                                  You are not speaking about Qur'an. I do not recognize eanything of it in your words and I doubt very much that you know a damned thing about it. In fact I think you are a troll and you are doing the job of hardcore mysiginists in orde to make appear that Islam is all about keeping women in their place. I am not interested in answering your whims and campaign to discredit islam nor the word of God in the honoured Qur'an. In your posts you have shown not to have the slightest idea of the Qur'an, you have always tried to push your own purported ideas as something out of th Qur'an, which not even remotely.

                                  I think you might do a better job, my general, if you took some time to updat Mein Kampf. Excuse me but I find your posts, from the point of view of anybody who may have had some familiarity with the Qur'an, as completely ignorant.

                                  Salaam

                                  I won't even respond to this. You would love me to take the bait, but you know what, I prefer to keep my dignity intact, but by all means, if it makes you feel better, keep up with the slander. I will continue to converse with sensible people and rise above this kind of provocation.

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                                    diamantinehoneybunch
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #46

                                    Why only wife that has to obey the husband? You are just making men look superior to women again and again.

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                                      huruf
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #47

                                      You would love me to take the bait,

                                      Would I?

                                      Man, do not take yourself so seriously, it is too funny.

                                      And look, see if you can bring up that aya where God orders husbands to disobey their wives. I am dying to see it.

                                      Salaam

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                                        learning_truth81
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #48

                                        Would I?

                                        Man, do not take yourself so seriously, it is too funny.

                                        And look, see if you can bring up that aya where God orders husbands to disobey their wives. I am dying to see it.

                                        Salaam

                                        I am also dying to see where is the aya to tell the wife to disobey the husband!

                                        Not to obey=To disobey

                                        Therefore one can only conclude that the wife should indeed obey the husband, as to not obey is to disobey right? Well where does the Quran condone that?

                                        Even if the husband is to obey the wife, where does it say it is right for either to disobey?? Your reasoning is absolutely ridiculous! You keep saying the wife DOES NOT need to obey the husband, therefore the only conclusion one can draw from that is that you are saying it is right to disobey the husband.

                                        Are you really then preaching from the Quran?? Are you even anywhere close to the tone of the Quran where respect and obdience are big part of being muslim. Yes to Allah, also to the Husband if he is the provider, and respect which is mutual.

                                        None of what you are preaching is from Quran. Your version, or rather vision of Islam is truly something else.

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                                          Man_of_Faith
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #49

                                          Salaam,

                                          Well, just 434 tells the man what he can do if there is certain discord in the relationship. The last step is to go away from the home. But the woman is not a subordinate that you can order around. It is a mutual relationship where both have a say.

                                          However, naturally it seems that women often take a subordinate position on their own volition, but that is something biological. The woman is still not a slave that you can have her obey you like a subordinate where she does not agree with you. When there is a discord between the man and woman and the man has gone through all steps in 434, Qur'an (God) advises that you bring in external counsel (435).

                                          In another part of Qur'an there is a verse talking about when the woman has a problem with the man. It does not say that the woman should obey and not question their husband and it indicates that the man should treat his wife well as the verse says if the woman feels that she is treated very harshly.

                                          God bless you

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