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  4. Arranged Marriages are an INJUSTICE?

Arranged Marriages are an INJUSTICE?

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  • U Offline
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    unknownuser
    wrote on last edited by
    #72

    Salam Ahmed,

    Salam Sister Taj

    When I said "your name" I meant your full name "Ahmed Bahgat" and not just Ahmed! That combination is Egyptian no doubt. Like for example if your name were "Noor Al Haq" I would guess that you are Paki or Bengali. If your name were "Noor Allah" I would guess you are Iranian, generally speaking.

    I agree regarding my full name, in fact I know a couple named Ahmed Bahgat, a famous Egyptian writer who writes in Al Ahram, and a very famous business man named Ahmed Bahgat

    The movies )
    Suad, Lyla, Adel, Sala7... are also very popular in Egyptian movies, no? It is been a while since I've watched an Egyptian movie. The last one was Adel Imam's "El Safarah Fee El 3imarah". About Israli embassy renting an apartment, as the place for the embassy, in the same building that Adel Imam lives in Cairo. Not a bad movie but I loved his old ones much better, the ones with Yusra and Elham Shaheen..

    Believe it or not Taj, my wife ?anne? watch all these movies and I hardly do while she was raised in Australia and I was raised in Egypt, I hardly watch TV actually, only News, Sports and Documentaries, but I used to like the old black and white Egyptian movies, they are great indeed, not the current crap

    TAJ wrote

    Naturally! Nothing is wrong with that. But how can you ask a husband for your daughter? How do you say it? I am curious! Do you have a certain tactics, implications...??

    no tactics but looking for a good man to my daughter

    How!? Give me an example of how, if that is not too much to ask! ? I am just curious!

    very hard Taj, it depends on talks with my daughter after I allow her to talk to him and to understand him, possibly through talks with my wife and certainly through talks with him, possibly also asking about him through third parties who know him well, and if the daughter is fine then why not?

    my mother in law wanted an egyptian husband to her daughter after the horrible experience she went through with her australian daughter in law who was married to her elder son and had 4 children from him, the aussie wife even prevented the kids from seeing their grand parents, they divirced 4 years ago and now he is married to an egyptian and have anopther 2 kids from her, his second marraige was arranged and they are very happy, so that was the motive for my mother in law to seek a husband from the same culture so she went with her to haj and asked Allah for Ibn El Hallal to her daughter and I reckon her wish was granted lol

    I will tell you something Egyptian women are really different than the rest of women in the whole world!!!! You know, there is a saying that is quite common here that goes "He who has not married an Egyptian woman, has not been married at all"!!! And local women have some feeling against Egyptian women!!!! And I better stop here lol

    Well, I?m so lucky then, but it seems because I?m Egyptian I found the other Arabic women more sexier than the Egyptian women, in fact I love their Arabic accent heaps, LOL

    of course sister another stupid and flawed cultural thing, for me when my Kitab was written, I committed the thing betwen me and my wife and we didn't wait for the dukhla
    OoooooooooooooKkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!

    We were legal husband and wife sister, the Kitab was written, and my wife is a very open minded woman and does not hold that much regards for the confusing traditions, especially she was raised in Australia

    I have to disagree here. I think it is something that you would want to keep for "Ellailah El Kebeerah". I have read that even in USA that this sort of "waiting" is spreading among some girls, not to mention that it already exists there among conservative religious people. Jessica Simpson the singer, is one famous example.

    We actually had two Lialah Kebeerah, one in Cairo ?Dar Eldifa El Gawi? and in Sydney when I arrived, but I careless about all these facial protocols, I were legal husband and wife and our Kitab was witnessed by all family and friends in a small party, then we went on a cruise on the Nile, she was my wife Ala Sunnah Allah

    Peace Brother

    Likewise sister

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      unknownuser
      wrote on last edited by
      #73

      You haven't been ever married to one nor do you know more egyptian couples around you...right? ) 'cos otherwise you wouldn't say so I guess.

      I agree

      Egyptians are definititly very kind people (damhum chafeef!), but egyptian men yell to their wifes as much as other arab men cry .

      I also agree lol but not me

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      • T Offline
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        TAJ
        wrote on last edited by
        #74

        Salam Ahmed,

        Well, I?m so lucky then, but it seems because I?m Egyptian I found the other Arabic women more sexier than the Egyptian women, in fact I love their Arabic accent heaps, LOL

        Now which Arabic accent would that be!?

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          unknownuser
          wrote on last edited by
          #75

          Salam Ahmed,

          Well, I?m so lucky then, but it seems because I?m Egyptian I found the other Arabic women more sexier than the Egyptian women, in fact I love their Arabic accent heaps, LOL

          Now which Arabic accent would that be!?

          honestly I like them all except the iraqi, because simply I don't understand it lol

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            TAJ
            wrote on last edited by
            #76

            Salam Ahmed,

            Salam Ahmed,

            Well, I?m so lucky then, but it seems because I?m Egyptian I found the other Arabic women more sexier than the Egyptian women, in fact I love their Arabic accent heaps, LOL

            Now which Arabic accent would that be!?

            honestly I like them all except the iraqi, because simply I don't understand it lol

            Got to go for an errand. When I return, I will respond in detail Salam now!

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            • W Offline
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              warda
              wrote on last edited by
              #77

              Salam Taj

              Salam Warda,

              I was only speaking generally and only based on the couples I know. They men looked extremely powerless and they made good "housewives"! They would cook, clean, etc..

              WOW! where did you find them? Is there one left who is not married yet? If so tell me, I will be divorced soon lol looool

              But then again you should see the men from around here
              And I believe they are worse because they are less educated than the Egyptians. They suppress women much more than in Egypt, don't you think?

              Could possibly be so. What I know for sure is that women in every days life are present. With or without Hijab (well nowadays 90% are with Higab) but you seem them everywhere and this is nice. I think in SA women are not that much seen on the streets especially not alone. And I can't imagine that men in your country are less educated than in Egypt. Is it like this? Maybe Ahmed can tell us something about it.

              Salam
              warda

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                Prince
                wrote on last edited by
                #78

                I will tell you something Egyptian women are really different than the rest of women in the whole world!!!! You know, there is a saying that is quite common here that goes "He who has not married an Egyptian woman, has not been married at all"!!! And local women have some feeling against Egyptian women!!!! And I better stop here lol

                Daaaaaymmm I need to get myself to Egypt or something. But I do love Arab women though...very mysterious and mind you no offense but always wanting love lol lol

                PEACE

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                  SwedenMajidah
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #79

                  Salaam 2 pac,

                  Oh yes, so now u like arab women lol some week ago u like blond women lol

                  But why you just don't say it out loud that you like all women lol lol lol

                  Peace Sis Majidah

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                    Prince
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #80

                    Salaam Sweden Majidah

                    Let's just say I have my preferences, arab women being one of them and mixed race )

                    PEACE

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                      SwedenMajidah
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #81

                      Salaam,

                      Ok, then I wish you very good luck to find that kind of woman.

                      Peace Sis Majidah

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                        TAJ
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #82

                        Salam Warda,

                        Salam Warda,

                        I was only speaking generally and only based on the couples I know. They men looked extremely powerless and they made good "housewives"! They would cook, clean, etc..

                        WOW! where did you find them? Is there one left who is not married yet? If so tell me, I will be divorced soon lol looool

                        No but really, that is a well known fact! At least around here. But maybe it is not only because the Egyptian men are so kind abut also maybe because their women are so strong, unlike the women from SA and the other Gulf countries Oman, Bahrain, Qatar, UAE and Kuwait. They are painfully submissive.

                        But then again you should see the men from around here
                        And I believe they are worse because they are less educated than the Egyptians. They suppress women much more than in Egypt, don't you think?

                        Could possibly be so. What I know for sure is that women in every days life are present. With or without Hijab (well nowadays 90% are with Higab) but you seem them everywhere and this is nice. I think in SA women are not that much seen on the streets especially not alone. And I can't imagine that men in your country are less educated than in Egypt. Is it like this? Maybe Ahmed can tell us something about it.

                        Generally speaking, some men here not only lack a lot of basic etiquette but also they never think of themselves as making mistakes. They think they are perfect and the woman has to be grateful for getting a husband, at all!!! But then again, they are only like that when they are with their SA wives. They would treat their foreign wives so differently, with so much respect!!!

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                          TAJ
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #83

                          Peace All,

                          Has anybody here seen the movie "Corpse Bride"? It is about arranged marriages!!! It has many deep meanings. Give it a shot!

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                            Jaxal
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #84

                            SaLaM Taj

                            Actually, East is Easy is the movie to watch to see how arrange marriages are in those countries looooooooolll

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                              TAJ
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #85

                              Thanks Jaxal. I would have suggested "Monsoon Wedding" but such movies were not my intention, although I loved "Monsson Wedding" a lot.
                              "Corpse Bride" is a light, musical, animated movie. I wanted to suggest some entertainment that is related to this discussion )

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                                Jaxal
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #86

                                SaLaM Taj

                                East is East is SO about arrange marriages.

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                                  Tahira
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #87

                                  Salam people

                                  If any one knows about forced/arranged marriage it s got to be me. I got thrown away(head first) into marriage when i was 16. I didn't have a clue about what was going on till 3 days before my wedding and when i objected i was told by mum that she'll rip up my passport and leave me in pakistan forever. At 16 i was scared to death. My inlaws weren't any help either, they expected me to cook clean and run the house like a perfect housewife ,oh and get pregnant very quickly. I stayed with them for nearly a year and hated every moment of it. I wasn't allowed to go anywhere by myself and would get told off for laughing or having fun.
                                  My husband didn't stick up for me over there because my relatives and inlaws would always tell him lies about me but when he came here and experianced my life over here(which wasn't any better)things changed and now he's soooooooooooo perfect.
                                  A QUESTION FOR MOST MUSLIM MEN. How do you fall in love with a woman/girl wearing full hijab and covering her face? How can you fall in love if you can't see her. Imagine you guys marrying a girl and lifting her veil on the wedding night and she looks like something from the planet of the apes. Didn't Allah create each and every face different for a reason.

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                                    unknownuser
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #88

                                    hi tahira,

                                    How do you fall in love with a woman/girl wearing full hijab and covering her face? How can you fall in love if you can't see her. Didn't Allah create each and every face different for a reason.

                                    does 'falling in love' have anything or only to do with the face or the physical appearance?

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                                      Ming-Lo
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #89

                                      SaLaM LT

                                      This JUST reminded me of something i saw on news today. The Japanese princess gave up her title and status to marry a commoner. Isnt that stupid?

                                      LOL! They weren't lying when they said that love makes you do the craziest (STUPIDEST) things!.....Well....I'm quite sure she is happier being with the one she loves, since loved ones mean more then titles and status......kinda sucks she couldn't keep her title though......and the next thing i'm going to say shows how ignorant I am when it comes to knowing about Royal families and how the Monarchy system works.....If she didn't marry a commoner, then she would marry a member in the Royal family (I think).....wouldn't that make them related? Sorry, again I have little knowledge on royalty and things of that sort.... ?

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                                        SwedenMajidah
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #90

                                        Peace Tahira,

                                        How many kids do you have now?

                                        I was getting married when I was 17 and have 5 kids now.

                                        Well I don't believe in that hijjab rules at all, it's manmade.

                                        Remember we are created nude but since we get smart we dress our private parts for no one to see except the one we get married to.

                                        Peace Sis Majidah

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                                          Tahira
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #91

                                          Salam peacfulmuslim

                                          Depends on wether your'e an admirer of the face or physical appearance.

                                          If she s wearing a hijab you can't see either.

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