Did I commit a sin while fasting ..
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AOA guys
Here goes .. I've been wanting a thai massage since a long time! Just wanted to relax in the best way possible.
OK i went to the massage place today and when I got there, they showed me into a room. They placed a towel on the bed thing and told me to undress and wear the towel. I left my boxers on (as most ppl would do) and put the towel around me.
The lady came in and said that everything should be off and I thought 'yea ok, I have everything off and she prolly hasnt included the boxers.'. I get onto the bed and she see's that I have my boxers on. She takes them off and half way through she asks me, whether I mind or not. I said 'no' being so stupid of me.
Ok basically when I was on my stomach, she touched my ass and massaged it as well (sorry for going into so much detail). She put a towel on it when she wasnt massaging it. When was on my back, she covered my thingy and asked me if I was shy. I said 'yea' but she was massaging the leg and kinda touched my thingy 3-5 times. I could have said #'no' but she didnt understand english properly and was laughing at me cus i was making sure that the towel was on it. I m sounding like a kid but cant explain it any better.Ok I know I have committed a big sin. I just went with the intentions of getting a massage n nuthing else. I know its up to Allah todecide whether its a sin or not but just want ur views. I m also fasting so I hope my fast hasnt been nullified.
I have been feeling so guilty after that and vowed to never go again just because of this. I m just scared of this experience having a bad effect on my future. I have my driving test tmrw and going to uni on sat so I hope this experience doesnt make me fail my test or makes me have a bad time at uni. I really am repentful on this.Whats the best way to repent from Allah on this? I need advice asap. ???
Thanks
P.S Hope Ramadan is going great for u guys ..
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Peace Ammar
Oh man that's funny ... gotta watch out for those frisky maseusses ;D
But in all seriousness, could'a would'a should'a isn't gonna help you at this point. We all make mistakes, the point is to learn from them. Maybe next time take a breath, think for a sec and then say, I don't want a full body massage. Just my back is fine. Or you can let the person at the front desk know ahead of time so there's no surprise undressing lol Or you could just get up and leave...
You probably felt nervous or embarrassed to speak up which is normal under those circumstances. Could you have done better? Yea but how does that help you now? My advice to you is don't worry about it. You learned your lesson, and move on. As far as God forgiving you, from the way I view repentance is you pray to God for forgiveness, you don't do it again, and you chase a bad deed with a good deed and you're good to go. Go out of your way to help someone you don't know who's in need or something to that effect.
If you want my opinion (and my opinion doesn't mean anything in this matter, nor does anyone else's) I don't think you did anything wrong. You might want to cover yourself more but it's not like you were getting it on with her or something lol
Good luck with your exam, and take it easy! Life is too short to spend it worrying over spilled milk
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Peace,
Only God knows your intentions, it wasn't your fault. Even if you get aroused, that still wouldnt be your fault because
- It is natural to do so
- That wasn't your intent
Now if you had gone the extra step and actually had sexual intercourse, that would have been a different story since then you would have made the choice to do so. Remember the story of Joseph. God knows best and He/She is Most Merciful.
Wa Salam
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LOL
peace,
If one considers themselves of the mumineen (trustful) then I dont think one would be able to justify geting a massage from the opposite sex, unless it was for an actual injury or part of medical treatment.
Having said the above, I have had a massage in the past (not for an injury or part of medical treatment) but not like your experience.
If you feel you did wrong, just make amends in the way 'al quran' suggests.
Wakas
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You lead an interesting life ammarb87. I don't think I would go in for a massage unless I knew the person real well. I mean who knows what the person is thinking or if they are straight or what not.
In my view, maybe you got caught in the heat of the moment cough and said fine to taking it all off or something. Shyness, lack of assertiveness, fear of the unknown...etc. So, now you know what to expect and that's a good thing I suppose. It could have been worse. She could have started pointing and laughing but what doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.
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peace
you went and got a massage. OMG youre going to hell now. there is no doubt. I mean she even touched "it" a little, and then during ramadan. sigh...its been good to know you, but the angel of death will come to reclaim you soon, for such insolence.
what the hell is wrong with you people, listen to the advice your giving. You went and got a massage from a trained person, good for you, i hope it helped. And this whole men and women cant operate together without thinking of sex is plainly ridiculous i find it insulting, and old tribal thinking. We have naturist movements here. This means people who do al the things people do, but butt naked. They dont sexually assault eachother, on the contrary. It takes away any sense of mystique there ever was to it.
When we move on to understand that people are people, regardless of sex, is when i belive we have a surviving chace. But to stay with one foot in the tribal world of saudi arabia, seems odd to me, for a movement based on ridding itself of that very same kind of thinking. But apparently some things just stick huh? Like if men and weman see eachother undressed they instantly think naughty....trust me on this, when she touched you little thingie, it was not on purpose but part of the masage and to do it properly.
She touched your ass....how very sexually ridden...OMG im going home
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in fact you know what. you better cut off the offending parts to redeem yourself. Did your hand touch her at all, like did you shake hands? you better cut that off too just be be sure.
_(as irony is dishonest here is what i really think To her, massaging your ass has the same sexual value, as baking a cake. And as for your little thingie, she have seen so many of them being a proffesionally trained person, that whatever you have....wont impress! I would much rather have a nice girl massage me than some hairy man, sorry its just my pref, and if it makes me "not trustful", so be it. But im sick and tired of this holyer than thou attitide of believers as it is based on nothing but mere speculation, half truths, and wishful thinking....ALL believers that is)
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You know Magi, I know better than to get involved when you start ranting but I just thought I'd clarify a few things here
And this whole men and women cant operate together without thinking of sex is plainly ridiculous i find it insulting, and old tribal thinking. We have naturist movements here. This means people who do al the things people do, but butt naked. They dont sexually assault eachother, on the contrary. It takes away any sense of mystique there ever was to it.
Those nude movements you are talking about are never really going to be the norm. They are limited to a small bunch of people who think it's liberating or what not. There is a huge world out there with the majority of people thinking way differently than these 'nature lovers' and that's just the way it is.
When we move on to understand that people are people, regardless of sex, is when i belive we have a surviving chace. But to stay with one foot in the tribal world of saudi arabia, seems odd to me, for a movement based on ridding itself of that very same kind of thinking. But apparently some things just stick huh? Like if men and weman see eachother undressed they instantly think naughty....trust me on this, when she touched you little thingie, it was not on purpose but part of the masage and to do it properly.
People are people are people, sure. When the majority will start thinking like this (and not just when I'm in a nudist club ), is when I might think about lowering my defences, thank you very much. I don't think it's going to happen anytime soon.
But im sick and tired of this holyer than thou attitide of believers as it is based on nothing but mere speculation, half truths, and wishful thinking....ALL believers that is)
I'm sick and tired of people wanting everyone else to believe as they do. It's ironic, isn't it. One has to understand, the world will always be full of different people with different ways of thinking. No matter what grand plan one comes up with to absolve a situation of any 'sexual' or otherwise aspect, there is always going to be someone else who is going to see it differently. It's not enough to say 'Rise above all this, you worms'. What is actually going to work is understanding the reasons for why it happens, try and think as to what might make things better and have defences against those (and believe me, there will always be those) who don't think the same as you and try to get um, funny with you. I'm all for practical solutions that will actually work. This idealism tends to get boring after a while. I personally think that the quran teaches us these defences because God knows quite well that the situation is never going to be ideal.
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Peace magi
And this whole men and women cant operate together without thinking of sex is plainly ridiculous i find it insulting, and old tribal thinking.
unfortunately i have to second savage here, even though i find it insulting too. But i actually stopped seing male doctors after some ugly experiences - except one "good" guy i know is trustworthy. But after these experiences, it's not that i think that all males will act this way, but well i prefer not to take the chance when i choose a doctor...
For massage (medical also) i only accept women as well.... can only hope that it'll not one day be a horny lesbian ) lol
lk
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Those nude movements you are talking about are never really going to be the norm. They are limited to a small bunch of people who think it's liberating or what not. There is a huge world out there with the majority of people thinking way differently than these 'nature lovers' and that's just the way it is.
but on the other hand they are living proof of our misconceptions when it comes to the human body and how it affects people.
People are people are people, sure. When the majority will start thinking like this (and not just when I'm in a nudist club )), is when I might think about lowering my defences, thank you very much. I don't think it's going to happen anytime soon.
im not arguing that everyone should walk around nude, personally i would not do so. Im saying that they are proof that we have serious misconceptions.
I'm sick and tired of people wanting everyone else to believe as they do. It's ironic, isn't it. One has to understand, the world will always be full of different people with different ways of thinking. No matter what grand plan one comes up with to absolve a situation of any 'sexual' or otherwise aspect, there is always going to be someone else who is going to see it differently. It's not enough to say 'Rise above all this, you worms'. What is actually going to work is understanding the reasons for why it happens, try and think as to what might make things better and have defences against those (and believe me, there will always be those) who don't think the same as you and try to get um, funny with you. I'm all for practical solutions that will actually work. This idealism tends to get boring after a while. I personally think that the quran teaches us these defences because God knows quite well that the situation is never going to be ideal.
Who is talking ideal? He had a massage from someone trained to do so and people try to make it out as if it was a problem, or even "shady" in regard to faith. If his intentions was to get a massage, then what is the problem? The more of a lid you put on things, the more pervs you create. Antidrug laws, makes youngsters smoke more dope, not less. This is a fact.
Does it say anywhere in the Quran that you cannot have a woman give you a massage, or is this a matter of interpreation?peace
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For massage (medical also) i only accept women as well.... can only hope that it'll not one day be a horny lesbian lol
excactly lk.
peace
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but on the other hand they are living proof of our misconceptions when it comes to the human body and how it affects people.
Living proof are years of marriage, I don't even have to look towards weird naked people (not that I want to).
im not arguing that everyone should walk around nude, personally i would not do so. Im saying that they are proof that we have serious misconceptions.
Of course, I meant that no matter what conceptions we have, we have to deal with many people who will have misconceptions. In which case, it is not practically possible to change everyone's mind but rather that we are prepared to deal with said eventualities.
Who is talking ideal? He had a massage from someone trained to do so and people try to make it out as if it was a problem, or even "shady" in regard to faith. If his intentions was to get a massage, then what is the problem? The more of a lid you put on things, the more pervs you create. Antidrug laws, makes youngsters smoke more dope, not less. This is a fact.
Does it say anywhere in the Quran that you cannot have a woman give you a massage, or is this a matter of interpreation?I agree with you partially, at the same time, my point has been is that we better be prepared to deal with those that will cause problems and one of the defences is not to put ourselves in strange situations. About the quran, have you read the passages that talk about nudity etc? If you think there is a problem, please open up a thread for discussion. I would be quite interested in alternate explanations, if there are any. Peace.
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Living proof are years of marriage, I don't even have to look towards weird naked people (not that I want to).
so in respect to what were talking about, what you are saying is. If you see a naked man, you are "game" just like that?
Of course, I meant that no matter what conceptions we have, we have to deal with many people who will have misconceptions. In which case, it is not practically possible to change everyone's mind but rather that we are prepared to deal with said eventualities.
how so, by not dealing with it? How so by hiding it away pretending its not really there? Either we live out the equal respect amongst the sexes, or we dont belive in it at all. It is the burka arguement all over. Does it not protect women from abuse that no man can see their body and thus "get tempted" ???
I agree with you partially, at the same time, my point has been is that we better be prepared to deal with those that will cause problems and one of the defences is not to put ourselves in strange situations. About the quran, have you read the passages that talk about nudity etc? If you think there is a problem, please open up a thread for discussion. I would be quite interested in alternate explanations, if there are any. Peace.
Like which passages? that women and men should cover themself in public?. I agree, by God there are far more people id rahter NOT see without clothes than there is of those id like to see naked. But we are not talking public, we are talking about a professional person, of female sex, using her skills on a male. This is no more akward to me than if my female mechanic fixed me gearbox.
Many of those well meant precautions that we like to think up, is afaisi often a direct route to more trouble than they solve. Ofcourse we could go back to total seperation between sexes and burkas, in fact, let men wear them too. No temptation at all. However i suspect that wont do much but create problems, and thus i stand by my view "Either we live out the equal respect amongst the sexes (nomatter what they individually chose to, or not to wear), or we dont belive in it at all and is mere good intentions. I belive the road to hell are paved with those.
peace
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rotfl
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