Does Quran give marriage steps?
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I haven't found much except for the ayats about free gift and contract, but again, I didn't do complete scanning. It seems that the mainstream marriage steps are based on hadiths.
see herehttps//www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=674295059270105&id=502950646404548So my question is has anyone found how Quran tells us how to do it or it is okay to do it in the court by signing the paper?
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Wow, getting married, how cool.
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Thanks )
How old are you? Is this your first marriage? Are they a Muslim guy who is into the Qur'an only and stuff?
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You should not ask a girl her age P. But to answer your question, I am in my late 20's. He is 30 (always okay to ask a man's age P) a monotheist like me. But he is more of a follower in the relationship. He wants things to be like how I want them to be. My family is same like that. Jokes apart, he is currently busy with the paper work of the house he is buying for us.
We have no interest in holding grand wedding parties mainly because I don't get the meaning of them and he believes in evil eye. I just want have our own families participate. No inviting relatives. Mine are Deaf, dumb and blind...(21 anyways despite the fact that their money show in weddings didn't save a single marriage of theirs in the last 15 years. Meanwhile, he has no relatives in US.
Is this your first marriage?
rotfl loved this question. The answer is YES.
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You should not ask a girl her age . But to answer your question, I am in my late 20's. He is 30 (always okay to ask a man's age ) a monotheist like me. But he is more of a follower in the relationship. He wants things to be like how I want them to be. My family is same like that. Jokes apart, he is currently busy with the paper work of the house he is buying for us.
We have no interest in holding grand wedding parties mainly because I don't get the meaning of them and he believes in evil eye. I just want have our own families participate. No inviting relatives. Mine are Deaf, dumb and blind...(21 anyways despite the fact that their money show in weddings didn't save a single marriage of theirs in the last 15 years. Meanwhile, he has no relatives in US.
rotfl loved this question. The answer is YES.Cool! So are you from the USA and he is from some other place? Where is he from? What culture is the evil eye thing prominent in? I hear it lots from Pakistan, maybe India too, but I bet they make a big deal in other places as well like Africa. I kind of wish it were true and I had two big evil eyes so I could just zap stuff like superman.
I was born in Canada but I lived in the USA mostly and now I'm back in Canada, I'm 28.
Its nice with some of the people from different cultures when they don't have much of a past in the way of relationships and stuff, though I don't know his case.
He is a monotheist and a follower, that sounds good enough. Does he come from a Sunni background or anything or Christian or what? All this is fascinating to me, I'd love to know the whole story.
I process all the information and add it to a big registry of factoids in my mind so that when I see clues in the real world I can quickly process and predict (or hallucinate) huge stories based on little bits of information that I see.
I've seen lots of people giving long hugs, girls hugging and holding on to these taller Indianish seeming guys, in one case the girl was crying and it seemed like some kind of break up, it was a Sikh guy and a white girl, she had a star and moon tattoo, I wanted to interfere but I just watched. I imagined it might be something like "My parents said I can't see you anymore" haha, but I don't know.
Then I saw it again tonight, but this one seemed a little less dramatic in the case of the guy at least and the girl didn't seem to be crying.
I've never had much of a relationship, people just crap on me and that seems to be the way things go. While I was walking today I was thinking how I'm so deprived of anything in that regard that its no wonder I just tolerate whatever and I'm pleased with even the scantest affection.
It is weird how different people are given different things in life.
I like that your guy is a follower, one of the things I never liked about girls with guys is the idea that guys start bossing them around suddenly sometimes.
How did you two meet? What is the whole story?
I might be getting married too someday soon to someone a year younger than me, but I can't say its anything that great or pleasing, its a weird convoluted tale that is more about me being cool and everyone else being horrible (short version).
Similar to that story is another story that happened today, where I ordered a particular sandwich impulsively and was a little bit disturbed by the price and paying for another drink and stuff when I already had one from an earlier order, and then they magically gave me the wrong chicken sandwich, with bacon on it to top it off, and I ended up getting it all free. That kind of chaos and benefit stuff happens constantly. I was supposed to get a new cell phone today but it was delayed so the 108 dollar shipping was refunded. So the same goes with the ultra weirdness and life changing stuff related to this marriage thing I was talking about.
Did you meet on the computer? I've never really dated or done any of that stuff. I don't like the idea of being sized up and judged and stuff.
I'd love if robots could be made so I could just buy one, that would be nice, and so many girls would be spared trauma if guys could just mess around with robots instead of people.
If a robot cheats on me too then I've really gotta say F U to the world, that would just be so crappy.
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Oh, this might be too personal but I'm curious if you guys did pre-marital sex?
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I'm wondering if you're planning to marry in religious ceremony with civil contract or civil marriage alone.
Thank you Noob. I have to go by state law which I am still studying. So haven't decided just yet.
He is from an European country. We both are outsiders here, but my lineage goes back to one of his neighboring countries. His parents settled here in the 80s. He's born here. He used to be Christian, but didn't agree with bible. He became atheist, then agnostic and now believes in God using my view. Perhaps, my conversation had some kind of influence. I never forced him to believe in anything.
How did you two meet? What is the whole story?
Did you meet on the computer?
We met in a class. Actually, back then I was in bachelor and he was in masters. The reason why we came together is because we have many similarities, yet differences that complement each other.
I might be getting married too someday soon to someone a year younger than me, but I can't say its anything that great or pleasing, its a weird convoluted tale that is more about me being cool and everyone else being horrible (short version).
Never marry the person you know you won't survive with under one roof. Hesitation and doubts are a good sign that a relationship/marriage wont last.
I've never had much of a relationship, people just crap on me and that seems to be the way things go. While I was walking today I was thinking how I'm so deprived of anything in that regard that its no wonder I just tolerate whatever and I'm pleased with even the scantest affection.
I learned that being politically correct doesn't pay off in a relationship. The moment I said to myself I deserved the best and I will not compromise he came in my life. I tell you to do the same. Its "magical".
What culture is the evil eye thing prominent in?
I suppose in many cultures including the central European ones. Also in religions like Judaism the concept exists.
I was born in Canada but I lived in the USA mostly and now I'm back in Canada, I'm 28.
Why did you leave US?
Oh, this might be too personal but I'm curious if you guys did pre-marital sex?
Actually, this is one of the many reasons that gave rise to our relationship. Ah, what I am gonna tell you might sound like some sort of magazine article, but its actually what we have discussed and enforced in our relationship. I know God forbids pre-marital sex. But both of us were more interested in the reason behind it than thinking of it as merely a sin. We didn't do pre-marital sex because we didn't want our marriage to die. Sex is an exclusive bonding right which equals to giving ourselves 100 percent to the one we love. If it is given before marriage there wont be anything more to discover about each other.
Also sex is a big responsibility. We didn't want to deal with headache of lying to parents while feeling guilty about it. We didn't want to worry about pregnancy and I didn't want to look ugly and bear other biological changes by taking those pills. Also we wanted to be honest examples for our future children instead of practicing hypocrisy.
But sex is not the only thing which we thought should be left for marriage. We also agreed that before marriage, we didn't have the right to use each other's finance for personal stuffs and intervene in family matters.
I've seen lots of people giving long hugs, girls hugging and holding on to these taller Indianish seeming guys, in one case the girl was crying and it seemed like some kind of break up, it was a Sikh guy and a white girl, she had a star and moon tattoo, I wanted to interfere but I just watched. I imagined it might be something like "My parents said I can't see you anymore" haha, but I don't know.
Oh, Indians here in US usually prefer to marry their own kinds. They are very devoted to their cultural practices. It has a very strong presence in their homes.
People of other countries like China, Vietnam, Iran and Egypt told me their parents were scared of white boyfriends because they thought of them as immoral and thus untrustworthy for marriage P. Others talked about language barrier.
We two reject all cultural norms except for the concept of marriage. Our motto I am not every man and woman, I am me and I have my own desires. Before we started our relationship, we were very very blunt about this.
I like that your guy is a follower, one of the things I never liked about girls with guys is the idea that guys start bossing them around suddenly sometimes.
I don't like to be the boss though. I like things to be balanced, but sometimes I end up taking more decisions than him.
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Thank you Noob. I have to go by state law which I am still studying. So haven't decided just yet.
He is from an European country. We both are outsiders here, but my lineage goes back to one of his neighboring countries. His parents settled here in the 80s. He's born here. He used to be Christian, but didn't agree with bible. He became atheist, then agnostic and now believes in God using my view. Perhaps, my conversation had some kind of influence. I never forced him to believe in anything.
We met in a class. Actually, back then I was in bachelor and he was in masters. The reason why we came together is because we have many similarities, yet differences that complement each other.
Never marry the person you know you won't survive with under one roof. Hesitation and doubts are a good sign that a relationship/marriage wont last.
I learned that being politically correct doesn't pay off in a relationship. The moment I said to myself I deserved the best and I will not compromise he came in my life. I tell you to do the same. Its "magical".
I suppose in many cultures including the central European ones. Also in religions like Judaism the concept exists. Why did you leave US?
Actually, this is one of the many reasons that gave rise to our relationship. Ah, what I am gonna tell you might sound like some sort of magazine article, but its actually what we have discussed and enforced in our relationship. I know God forbids pre-marital sex. But both of us were more interested in the reason behind it than thinking of it as merely a sin. We didn't do pre-marital sex because we didn't want our marriage to die. Sex is an exclusive bonding right which equals to giving ourselves 100 percent to the one we love. If it is given before marriage there wont be anything more to discover about each other.Also sex is a big responsibility. We didn't want to deal with headache of lying to parents while feeling guilty about it. We didn't want to worry about pregnancy and I didn't want to look ugly and bear other biological changes by taking those pills. Also we wanted to be honest examples for our future children instead of practicing hypocrisy.
But sex is not the only thing which we thought should be left for marriage. We also agreed that before marriage, we didn't have the right to use each other's finance for personal stuffs and intervene in family matters.
Oh, Indians here in US usually prefer to marry their own kinds. They are very devoted to their cultural practices. It has a very strong presence in their homes.People of other countries like China, Vietnam, Iran and Egypt told me their parents were scared of white boyfriends because they thought of them as immoral and thus untrustworthy for marriage P. Others talked about language barrier.
We two reject all cultural norms except for the concept of marriage. Our motto I am not every man and woman, I am me and I have my own desires. Before we started our relationship, we were very very blunt about this.
I don't like to be the boss though. I like things to be balanced, but sometimes I end up taking more decisions than him.That sounds great! I've always thought I deserve the best, and I've been thoroughly kicked right between my butt cheeks all my life. As I think oh excellent I've got something good, thank God! It is destroyed or taken away right out of my hands or tainted and disrupted, so I'm left after numerous experiences like that to simply not put much hope into a world that isn't really given to me, I'm not sure what it is all about but it seems almost like I'm not allowed to be happy about anything worldly ever haha, its always pooped on. Even so, I'm an honorable person so I can't really discard people for their crimes against me or other horrible deficiencies, my focus is on just being an excellent human being, merciful, kind, and gentle (and full of hatred for a world that consistently ripped me off and kicked me while I was up or down).
I came to Canada to simply get some ID things that my family hadn't properly gotten for me, and ended up getting trapped here unable to go back to the USA, banned from entering the USA even to visit my family. I could imagine people like the Polish being into the Evil Eye and stuff, which country in particular is his family from and yours?
The story you told about you guys is really, really nice. I'm very pleased with all your decisions.
I heard from someone who used to visit this website that you had some family history that seemed involved with the elite or occultists or something? Maybe they were wrong. Did you complete those degrees you guys were talking about?
I hate being the boss and being bossed around, but I end up getting blamed for everything anyway so I make most decisions generally in everything and always end up gravitating towards leadership.
When did you become a Muslim?
When you said "back then" it sounds like there was a long relationship first before the eventual marriage?
I've lived for half a year with the person I mentioned the marriage about. I use every opportunity to cultivate further excellence when it comes to patience and other virtues, so dealing with difficult cases can at times help me when it comes to other people too and keeps me highly disciplined.
Even kittens can be curses, in my view, because they are nice and you love them and they are cute and maybe they grow up even and you bond so strongly, then they get sick, or hurt, or eventually die and it is deeply heartbreaking and disturbing because they were so good. So in a sense its a relief a bit when you're dealing with someone whose fully exposed and has their cards flipped up and visible. I mean I'd certainly opt for improvements in all cases always, its just in my experience I'm put through torture instead, I might just be a different monkey in a different experimental environment, for me its learning that all the raisins are poisoned and even the buttons to open up the cases have electrical currents running through them.
I pray for the absolute best, every day constantly, and I've been given a strange life where I'm just run on a roller coaster and the strangest stuff happens. Apparently that is the "best". Not a fan of the world at all lol.
When anything good comes my way, I ask that it be preserved, but it always gets destroyed, and good things cause anxiety because its just waiting for it to be destroyed, its always a car crash in progress.
Anyway though, I announce "I deserved the best and I will not compromise" and I never have compromised, but I just watch what God throws into my story.
I agree with all you wrote though! It is great anyway, and I'd love to hear more about your happiness and success, it does make me happy too when I see people are well. My evil eyes are rather impotent, but my "success for others" eyes seem to be working still! Haha why does it always have to be evil eyes? Why hasn't anyone thought of blessing eyes?
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That sounds great! I've always thought I deserve the best, and I've been thoroughly kicked right between my butt cheeks all my life. As I think oh excellent I've got something good, thank God! It is destroyed or taken away right out of my hands or tainted and disrupted, so I'm left after numerous experiences like that to simply not put much hope into a world that isn't really given to me, I'm not sure what it is all about but it seems almost like I'm not allowed to be happy about anything worldly ever haha, its always pooped on. Even so, I'm an honorable person so I can't really discard people for their crimes against me or other horrible deficiencies, my focus is on just being an excellent human being, merciful, kind, and gentle (and full of hatred for a world that consistently ripped me off and kicked me while I was up or down).
You sound like a very good human being who gives the wrong people chance. Don't do it. What I have noticed is that when the right person comes along everything just happens smoothly by itself. You will know about it.
I came to Canada to simply get some ID things that my family hadn't properly gotten for me, and ended up getting trapped here unable to go back to the USA, banned from entering the USA even to visit my family.
How did you get banned? Aren't you the citizen here?
I could imagine people like the Polish being into the Evil Eye
That's what he is.
I heard from someone who used to visit this website that you had some family history that seemed involved with the elite or occultists or something? Maybe they were wrong.
I have satanist relatives. We prefer staying away from them. His brother used to be one too, but that was mere a consequence of confusion of young age. I did some research on those things. Thus have strong knowledge. As for elite and their occultists, anyone can come across them if Internet is used properly. They have a few nests online. It can be quite depressing to see them though.
When you said "back then" it sounds like there was a long relationship first before the eventual marriage?
I still have trouble believing that so many years have passed by. It still feels as if we met yesterday.
I've lived for half a year with the person I mentioned the marriage about. I use every opportunity to cultivate further excellence when it comes to patience and other virtues, so dealing with difficult cases can at times help me when it comes to other people too and keeps me highly disciplined.
He taught me that cohabitation is an insult. According to him, when we are sure of the person we don't live with them. We marry them and then live with them.
Even kittens can be curses, in my view, because they are nice and you love them and they are cute and maybe they grow up even and you bond so strongly, then they get sick, or hurt, or eventually die and it is deeply heartbreaking and disturbing because they were so good.
Very true. Sometimes thats why I don't understand Allah's plan. We come to this world, get attached to all kinds of people. But then a time comes when they are taken away from us. We feel deeply hurt. Sometimes the trauma shows up. I always ask Allah why he created deep attachment when his intention is to take these people away in a way that we will never see them again. He gave many animals the right to forget quicker in this kind of situation. Love for us humans is always the biggest risk. I am not even talk about romantic relationships. Think about parents or siblings. When they depart we are left completely swollen.
So in a sense its a relief a bit when you're dealing with someone whose fully exposed and has their cards flipped up and visible. I mean I'd certainly opt for improvements in all cases always, its just in my experience I'm put through torture instead, I might just be a different monkey in a different experimental environment, for me its learning that all the raisins are poisoned and even the buttons to open up the cases have electrical currents running through them.
If they can't love you for who you are then they are not for you.
When anything good comes my way, I ask that it be preserved, but it always gets destroyed, and good things cause anxiety because its just waiting for it to be destroyed, its always a car crash in progress.
Anyway though, I announce "I deserved the best and I will not compromise" and I never have compromised, but I just watch what God throws into my story
You just shouldn't go there. Head for the one who fits your criteria. The words are meant to weed out potential douches instead of giving them chance in a relationship.
I agree with all you wrote though! It is great anyway, and I'd love to hear more about your happiness and success, it does make me happy too when I see people are well.
Thank you )
Haha why does it always have to be evil eyes? Why hasn't anyone thought of blessing eyes?
I think people invite others to wedding for the blessing eye, but it looks like most marriages end up in divorce. Perhaps, that is why, evil eye wins.
Congrats, reel. Best wishes and may the Lord be your strength. I heard that marriage comes with its own burden and sacrifices. I guess you are up to the task.
Thank you very much. I think the burden and sacrifice become bearable when two people get enough encouragement and might from each other. I believe ours would be nothing compared to the kind of burden and sacrifice our parents had to bear.
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I do not have that much faith in marriage anymore, but congratulations about the marriage, reel. Now you need to stay together as what GOD joins together must not be separated.
Be well
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You sound like a very good human being who gives the wrong people chance. Don't do it. What I have noticed is that when the right person comes along everything just happens smoothly by itself. You will know about it.
How did you get banned? Aren't you the citizen here?
That's what he is.
I have satanist relatives. We prefer staying away from them. His brother used to be one too, but that was mere a consequence of confusion of young age. I did some research on those things. Thus have strong knowledge. As for elite and their occultists, anyone can come across them if Internet is used properly. They have a few nests online. It can be quite depressing to see them though.
I still have trouble believing that so many years have passed by. It still feels as if we met yesterday.
He taught me that cohabitation is an insult. According to him, when we are sure of the person we don't live with them. We marry them and then live with them.
Very true. Sometimes thats why I don't understand Allah's plan. We come to this world, get attached to all kinds of people. But then a time comes when they are taken away from us. We feel deeply hurt. Sometimes the trauma shows up. I always ask Allah why he created deep attachment when his intention is to take these people away in a way that we will never see them again. He gave many animals the right to forget quicker in this kind of situation. Love for us humans is always the biggest risk. I am not even talk about romantic relationships. Think about parents or siblings. When they depart we are left completely swollen.
If they can't love you for who you are then they are not for you.
You just shouldn't go there. Head for the one who fits your criteria. The words are meant to weed out potential douches instead of giving them chance in a relationship.
Thank youI think people invite others to wedding for the blessing eye, but it looks like most marriages end up in divorce. Perhaps, that is why, evil eye wins.
Thank you very much. I think the burden and sacrifice become bearable when two people get enough encouragement and might from each other. I believe ours would be nothing compared to the kind of burden and sacrifice our parents had to bear.I considered myself married to the person for many years, I've been in a relationship with them for 6 years now or so and have always considered myself married to them but never did anything, the cohabitation issue was due to my getting trapped in Canada and having no one with me and my mother having to go back to work in Hawaii and I had never been left alone anywhere but they were with me and were a help at that time for the 6 months they were allowed to stay.
Can you tell me more about the Satanist relatives you have? His brother seems like a kind of common thing that happens to young adults but the Satanist relatives you have seem a bit more serious in what they are into. What is it all about? How does it work? Are they a traditional style family, like Satanists for a while? Are they a modern type or an older type? Yeah it is depressing to encounter the elite kind, their lives are pretty miserable.
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Thank you MOF )
I'll tell you about my relatives in pm Freedomstands. They prefer to make themselves appear Muslim outside because of the stigma associated with satanic rituals.
Ok! I look forward to it! My email is [email protected] if you prefer that instead!
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Congratulations Reel! )
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Thank you MOF )
I'll tell you about my relatives in pm Freedomstands. They prefer to make themselves appear Muslim outside because of the stigma associated with satanic rituals.
Still looking forward to it! I might need glasses though!