UNLAWFUL SEX?
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Peace
UNLAWFUL SEX?
The hypocrites argue that it is acceptable to have unlawful sex, which is sex secretly. That is because they cannot see clear anymore, for their perverted ignorance has lead them far astray, deep into darkness. According to God?s law, sex/union/marriage is the consummation of an openly proposed marriage/ union/sex.
Lawful sex/union is the one that is publicly/openly known, which is also called marriage. Because, everybody knows what the couple is going to do, except children. Therefore, marriage/union/sex is lawful until after the couple has complied with all that which God demands, with witnesses and signed agreement, before consummating the marriage/union/sex.
A man who tries to convince a believing woman to have sex/union secretly shall be considered an unbeliever. Therefore, such man shall be accused with the community, so that he can be cut/shun from it, and forbidden from entering any place of prayer.
Believing women, do not listen to the wicked one that propose you evil, for he will never fulfill his promises. After knowing that you are pregnant, he will run like a zebra, and you will never see him again. Fear God and obey His commands, because you will be the most affected. Remember that whoever fornicates is condemned to spend her/his life with another fornicator, or an infidel. If you listen to such a man, even if he were to promise you heaven, the only heaven you will see is if you sin in an open field.
A believing man that is truthful to his promises will propose sex/union/marriage the lawful way. And, the lawful way is the best for the wellbeing of women and children, if you but reason.
The wor ZiNA means any kind of unlawful sex, fornication, adultery, etc..
Mattew 527-28 You have heard that it was said to those of old, ?you shall not commit adultery.? ?But I say to you, that whoever looks at a woman to lust/desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.?1732 And do not approach fornication/adultery - for, behold, it is an abomination and an evil way.
242 The fornicatress/adulteress and the fornicator/adulterer, you shall lash each of them with one hundred lashes, and do not let any pity overtake you regarding the system of God if you believe in God and the Last Day. And let a group of the believers witness their punishment.
243 The fornicator/adulterer will only marry afornicatress/adulteress or she who is a polytheist. And the afornicatress/adulteress, she will only be married to a fornicator/adulterer or he who is a polytheist. And such has been made forbidden for the believers.
2426 The wicked females are for the wicked males, and the wicked males are for the wicked females. And the good females are for the good males, and the good males are for the good females;?Also, in order for a woman to be intimate with a man, she has to expose her private parts; and, 2431 And tell the believing females to lower their gaze and keep covered their private parts, and that they should not reveal their beauty except to ?their husbands,?
Then, believing women, if your man wants marriage/union/sex, make him sign the contract, with witnesses. And if he wants divorce, let him take all his children with him, as God commands, and you will see if he still want to go running to make more.
Young people are having all this perverted thoughts because they have little to do.
2432AND marry the single from among you... See people, God knows best, maybe that way they will stop perverting themselves, and invest their energies in something more useful.May God increase our knowledge and give us wisdom
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Just a general question to anybody and everybody who might care to answer
Why is sex outside of marriage (I'm not talking about having affairs here) wrong?
Everyone who I know that has done this is very happy and happily settled in married bliss with children, nice house, nice car, nice job, great lives, so why is it wrong? And if it is wrong, why do they have such great and happy lives? (Not saying that they shouldn't be happy, but I almost feel as though this is what we are led to believe).
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lol he always have topics regarding sex... but i think.. its something we say a dual test.. nobody can escape from it.. most of the people do it before their marriage .. becoz its in our system . this weakness or fault is already inside us .. and its hard to escape from it...on one side its need on other side its something which is hard to handle .. when emotions are on peak..
but again we should escape apart from marriage or which ur right hand possess.. very clear commandments..
peace
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Well, THAT IS marriage. Marriage is fact not a ceremony.
Salaam
Sorry, I should have been clearer. I'm not talking about having a long-term relationship with someone or whatever. I'm talking about people who have literally been with a number of people, casual frissons, one night stands, etc. and have done this over years with continuum and no regret, not even now. I have in mind a number of people, but one friend in particular who has been with well over 300 people. Surely, just because you have sex in such a manner, that doesn't mean that you will go to hell?
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that doesn't mean that you will go to hell?
how can you say .. may b they will not go to hell , but they have to pay or redeem a sin.. somehow..
when God declared it a sin there must be a punishment , let say 80 lashes in this world,, but if somebody escape from this world here after is waiting .. like if somebody rob me and never give my money back.. i have to take my money in the shape of good deeds in hereafter thats how it works.. same if somebody is cheating on their husbands and wife and having one night stands ... its not mean they will be neglected.. they will pay it here or herafter ...
and the only manner permissible is with spouses or which your right hand possess.. thats it.. quran is very clear about it.
peace
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Sorry, I should have been clearer. I'm not talking about having a long-term relationship with someone or whatever. I'm talking about people who have literally been with a number of people, casual frissons, one night stands, etc. and have done this over years with continuum and no regret, not even now. I have in mind a number of people, but one friend in particular who has been with well over 300 people. Surely, just because you have sex in such a manner, that doesn't mean that you will go to hell?
None of us have the knowledge or authority to say who's going to Hell and who's not...
That aside, people's perceptions of Hell are different, so for the sake of this discussion it would help if you would clarify what your understanding of "Hell" is.
In my opinion, I have always felt discouraged and would try to discourage others from causal sex with a multitude of partners. (But of course everyone has the power to do as they please; I'm just against it.) For clarity, when I say "causal sex", I'm referring to one-night stands, brief summer flings, and the beginnings of a relationship, when an emotional connection has not yet developed or matured between two people - in other words, when a relationship is built primarily on physical desire, and the two people involved are not intending or have not yet decided if they want the relationship to last.
In my mind, sex is special and meaningful. Perhaps even more importantly, sex is private. It's not an experience I want to share with others. For many women (and men, but mostly I believe this applies to women), sex is emotional. Attachments can develop, attachments that may not be felt on the other side. I have never wanted to experience heartbreak over a one-night stand because I wanted more or thought I felt an emotional connection when the guy wants less. If people are upfront about what they want and there is mutual consent, then fine. They can do whatever. But too often I feel that proper communication about sex doesn't come until after, or well after, a couple has had sex.
I also want my future children (if God wills I have them) to have a father, and/or a strong male role model figure that is present and positively influential in our children's lives. I think it's important and healthy for the children to have both parents involved, together, and standing as a united front as they care for and guide their children. In my opinion the best way to ensure my children get a present father (besides healthy expectations, communication and compromise) is to know and be sure of the person you're marrying (or choosing to enter a long-term commitment with).
I know in today's modern times, we have many good options for safe and reliable contraception to prevent pregnancies in the cases of causal sex or a lack of desire to have children, but humanity didn't always have access to all the methods of contraception that we have available. I'm sure many parts of the world still don't. Contraception is also never 100% effective, so all these reasons are why I think it's important for people to wait until they know each other more and have established that emotional connection, that will hopefully (not a guarantee; I recognize that) help them carry on the relationship with long-term success.
Also, I have not experienced causal sex myself, but I have seen people say that sex is more pleasurable when it's with someone you love (as opposed to causal sex).
Again, I have nothing personally against people who chose to engage in causal sex. They can do as they wish. I just don't think that we should be giving in to very physical desires as soon as many people are. If a person is allowing themselves to continuously have a lot of sex, eat a lot of food, or drink a lot and get wasted at parties, etc... Then these kind of prolonged physical behaviors are not productive to the person, and there are better uses of our time.
Life is a balance; as the saying goes, "Everything in moderation."
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oh common guys... that what the test is,,, we should not promote it.. we should guard our private parts and when something become habbit you cannot esacpe from it,, it involves the emotions of your life partner.. I know lot of my frds was engaged in casual sex and even after they get married they still continue.. as far I concern .. its not good to cheat on somebody..
dishonesty is dishonesty even it pleasureable ... I know its the most difficult restriction as it involves the desire which is uncontrollable but that's why the event of prophet joseph is in quran for a example , God like those who fullfill the tests ..
honesty is the best policy whether it with your partner or future partner or God... either way causal sex should not be promoted.. think about it if a girl or boy have 5 six affairs and have sex with them will he/she be brave enough to tell his/her partner about it.. and if he/she brave enough to tell him/her what will be the response.. I hope no body really like it...
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oh common guys... that what the test is,,, we should not promote it.. we should guard our private parts and when something become habbit you cannot esacpe from it,, it involves the emotions of your life partner.. I know lot of my frds was engaged in casual sex and even after they get married they still continue.. as far I concern .. its not good to cheat on somebody..
dishonesty is dishonesty even it pleasureable ... I know its the most difficult restriction as it involves the desire which is uncontrollable but that's why the event of prophet joseph is in quran for a example , God like those who fullfill the tests ..
honesty is the best policy whether it with your partner or future partner or God... either way causal sex should not be promoted.. think about it if a girl or boy have 5 six affairs and have sex with them will he/she be brave enough to tell his/her partner about it.. and if he/she brave enough to tell him/her what will be the response.. I hope no body really like it...
5 or 6? That's nothing.
Thank you, Comrox. I am just trying to gage the seriousness of it, I suppose, quranically. There is no punishment of hell stated for it, as far as I'm aware, so I suppose it's not as serious as other things. I imagine it is something which is discouraged by lashes because it is, primarily, a violation against the soul.
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oh common guys... that what the test is,,, we should not promote it.. we should guard our private parts and when something become habbit you cannot esacpe from it,, it involves the emotions of your life partner.. I know lot of my frds was engaged in casual sex and even after they get married they still continue.. as far I concern .. its not good to cheat on somebody..
I'm very sorry for your friends' spouses that your friends are cheating on them. Truly awful to go through... I hope they're aware of what is or has been going on.
honesty is the best policy whether it with your partner or future partner or God... either way causal sex should not be promoted.. think about it if a girl or boy have 5 six affairs and have sex with them will he/she be brave enough to tell his/her partner about it.. and if he/she brave enough to tell him/her what will be the response.. I hope no body really like it...
I disagree that honesty is the best policy. There are some situations in which harmless "white lies" may ease the event, such as a friend asking about how they look.
Sometimes people aren't looking for honesty... They're looking for validation, either emotional or societal.
There's also a difference between honesty and sharing every bit of information of your life with someone. Martial affairs as you mentioned is one example of information that needs to be shared, but what about pre-martial relations?
In my opinion, that's the type of information that doesn't need to be addressed. I don't care if my partner has had past partners or not, and I don't think anyone else should either (unless, of course, there's cheating involved). The past is the past for a reason. I don't want to know. Digging up past relationships fills the current relationship with much more jealousy, comparisons, anger, drama, trust issues, etc.
Thank you, Comrox. I am just trying to gage the seriousness of it, I suppose, quranically. There is no punishment of hell stated for it, as far as I'm aware, so I suppose it's not as serious as other things. I imagine it is something which is discouraged by lashes because it is, primarily, a violation against the soul.
If we take zina to mean pre-martial sex instead of adultery, then yes it's punishable by lashing, otherwise no.
But also remember for any physical punishment to be prescribed
(1) The act in question must have been done in a public-enough place for there to be witnesses
(2) There must have been at least 4 witnesses who saw the act
(3) All 4 witnesses must decide individually to testify against the person/couple that committed zina -
5 or 6? That's nothing.
trust me u making me laugh now.. its nothing ,,,
quranically. There is no punishment of hell stated for it, as far as I'm aware, so I suppose it's not as serious as other things. I imagine it is something which is discouraged by lashes because it is, primarily, a violation against the soul.
well in this way u did nothing wrong but , the feeling of somebody is very important... a human feeling means so much .. becoz human being is sensitive creation. no body really want to buy a thing which is violated and have no gurantee for future that it will run properly,, everybody want to buy a brand new car.. just as a example,,
I have a question from you do you like your future partner engage in affairs with somebody else,, or he had casual flings with somebody else before you ,,is it not unfair ...with you and your feelings... or if you already get to know about him ,, hows you really feel , does it make difference at all..? its not a personal question .. just as a example...
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I'm very sorry for your friends' spouses that your friends are cheating on them. Truly awful to go through... I hope they're aware of what is or has been going on.
I can see from inside how they suffer sometimes by different means.. anyways its between them and God . but honestly I feel sorry for their spouses who are unaware.. and if someday they get to know it is a big shock for them.. but again Its not my headache its between God and them.. nobody really perfect.
I disagree that honesty is the best policy. There are some situations in which harmless "white lies" may ease the event, such as a friend asking about how they look.
there are always two paths two ways two catagories. strait path and wrong path, honesty and dishonesty. true and lie. path of God and path of satan.
so I disagree with ur statement ,honesty is always a best policy and give you best results ,on the other hand dishonesty is not a action like by God in any sense..
If we take zina to mean pre-martial sex instead of adultery, then yes it's punishable by lashing, otherwise no.
But also remember for any physical punishment to be prescribed
(1) The act in question must have been done in a public-enough place for there to be witnesses
(2) There must have been at least 4 witnesses who saw the act
(3) All 4 witnesses must decide individually to testify against the person/couple that committed zinathis matter is a matter of respect that's why quran is clear about it to make witness of four , but everybody know its not a act that anybody do openly. apart from pornography people , and they also do it in private for money making purpose..
what my concern is here look at the punishment even we manage to do this act most of the people do it without knowing by anybody so does it mean its negelect by God, if u have no witness,, its will be accountable ,,
If somebody theft rob or murder somebody and have no witness , its doesn't mean God is not watching , that y God will call to account on everybody on judgement day.. becoz lot of things I mean unlawful things we do without the knowledge of everybody , but God is watching over everything and he will show us what we used to to do...
peace and God bless you
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Sura an-Nur is quite clear about these things. Things that are private have to stay private and ppeople who speak and do not bring four witnesses, are liers. It is not me who says it, it is god and vey insistently and clear cut. We are not to cary tales. And we ar also told that the fact that it is so is grace of God.
Why did they not bring four witnesses to prove it? When they have not brought the witnesses, such men, in the sight of Allah, (stand forth) themselves as liars! (13) Were it not for the grace and mercy of Allah on you, in this world and the Hereafter, a grievous penalty would have seized you in that ye rushed glibly into this affair. (14) Behold, ye received it on your tongues, and said out of your mouths things of which ye had no knowledge; and ye thought it to be a light matter, while it was most serious in the sight of Allah. (15) And why did ye not, when ye heard it, say? - "It is not right of us to speak of this Glory to Allah! this is a most serious slander!" (16) Allah doth admonish you, that ye may never repeat such (conduct), if ye are (true) Believers. (17) And Allah makes the Signs plain to you for Allah is full of knowledge and wisdom. (1 Those who love (to see) scandal published broadcast among the Believers, will have a grievous Penalty in this life and in the Hereafter Allah knows, and ye know not. (19) Were it not for the grace and mercy of Allah on you, and that Allah is full of kindness and mercy, (ye would be ruined indeed). (20)
O ye who believe! follow not Satan's footsteps if any will follow the footsteps of Satan, he will (but) command what is shameful and wrong and were it not for the grace and mercy of Allah on you, not one of you would ever have been pure but Allah doth purify whom He pleases and Allah is One Who hears and knows (all things). (21) Let not those among you who are endued with grace and amplitude of means resolve by oath against helping their kinsmen, those in want, and those who have left their homes in Allah's cause let them forgive and overlook, do you not wish that Allah should forgive you? For Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (22) Those who slander chaste women, indiscreet but believing, are cursed in this life and in the Hereafter for them is a grievous Penalty,- (23) On the Day when their tongues, their hands, and their feet will bear witness against them as to their actions. (24) On that Day Allah will pay them back (all) their just dues, and they will realise that Allah is the (very) Truth, that makes all things manifest. (25) Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity these are not affected by what people say for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honourable. (26)
Salaam
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Sura an-Nur is quite clear about these things. Things that are private have to stay private and ppeople who speak and do not bring four witnesses, are liers. It is not me who says it, it is god and vey insistently and clear cut. We are not to cary tales. And we ar also told that the fact that it is so is grace of God.
huruf I m confused what I did not understand , you try to say if we do privately something and we have nothing to worry about... that's what you try to say or I misunderstood you.
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huruf I m confused what I did not understand , you try to say if we do privately something and we have nothing to worry about... that's what you try to say or I misunderstood you.
We can't punish someone for "unlawful sex" without proof is what the sura says. We don't know how we will be held accountable for these acts (if we've faced a worldly punishment or not).
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We can't punish someone for "unlawful sex" without proof is what the sura says. We don't know how we will be held accountable for these acts (if we've faced a worldly punishment or not).
I m not talking about punishment , what i am asking is it ok to sex in private without witness... or if we do it what should we suppose to think
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logically no body can get punish if there are not four witness ,, correct fully agree..
but logically its something a act not supported by God or human, if a human being exposed doing it it will held responsible to get 80 or 100 lashes a wordly punishment... right so its a deed or act which is nasty ..
and a category of sin after murder in which we suppose to get punish in a painful way if adulterer get exposed by four witnesses.
behind the cover of four witness we cannot say its a act to be done in privacy having no fear or regret of anything whatsoever? whats your views..
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Obviously it is not ok if it is not as part of the real commitmnt to the other person. Sex is not maturbation, be it with oneself or with another. We are not animals without conscience.
It is true that sex is fun, like eating is fun, but that does not mean that we must not be careful of what or how much we eat. We know that excess in eating we pay it in health. Sex being tied ineviable with the emotional the moral and above all, with aother person it is reasonable to expect that what we do is not indifferent.
But, like with eating or drinking, God doe leave us room to improve ourselves before we are confronted with the worst consquences of our excesses.
Salaam
Salaam