Mingling with the opposite sex ????
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AOA guys ...
ok this topic was prolly posted a 10000000 times on the forum but I just wanna sort out my beliefs and make them firmer ..... today my dad was like mingling with the opposite sex is Haram and i belive it isnt ... so he was like show me verses from the Quran which say its not prohibited .. i went quiet cus i dont know any but i know its not prohibited ... then i kept thinking to myself over and over again then it isnt haram but dont have nething to support it ... neone knows of any verses which prohibit or not prohibit it ?
He was going on to my sister about how she should stop wearing small shirts .. though she doesnt wear any shirts which show her stomach etc .. when she bends down then yeah ..... they believe in the hijab etc ... i believe that modesty is different in everyones eyes and they were like if that was so then we would be living in a jungle and we are apparently to them ... i dont know .. -
AOA guys ...
ok this topic was prolly posted a 10000000 times on the forum but I just wanna sort out my beliefs and make them firmer ..... today my dad was like mingling with the opposite sex is Haram and i belive it isnt ... so he was like show me verses from the Quran which say its not prohibited .. i went quiet cus i dont know any but i know its not prohibited ... then i kept thinking to myself over and over again then it isnt haram but dont have nething to support it ... neone knows of any verses which prohibit or not prohibit it ?
He was going on to my sister about how she should stop wearing small shirts .. though she doesnt wear any shirts which show her stomach etc .. when she bends down then yeah ..... they believe in the hijab etc ... i believe that modesty is different in everyones eyes and they were like if that was so then we would be living in a jungle and we are apparently to them ... i dont know ..Peace Ammar.
Surely the Quran does tell men to lower their gaze, but that doesn't mean like the opposite sex runn away from each other like eithers' got an infectious disease!
The way I see it, we need to look at the definition of 'mingling' in this context. If it involves casual physical contact that for example men have between themselves, e.g. pat on the back or hand shake then perhaps we are supposed to stay away from doing that, but talking to them and that - no prohibition whatsoever.
The point you mentioned about wearing t-shirts and hijab - something I really find funny, is that 'muslims' girls at my college wear a hijab on top of a thin t-shirt type thing you were describing. I mean, what the hell's the point!!! Go for the hadith trash of hijabs and forget the garment of righteousness prescribed by God! And then they say they are being opressed. Surely if its a cold environment and you have some kind of ear disease then wear a hijab, otherwise wear it if you want to, not becuase the hadith authors wanted to seel their books off.
Thats my 2 cents anyway. Thanks for listening...
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Peace,
I know this is your father and it maybe disrespectful to ask him but if someone claims that something is prohibited then they should show the evidence, rather than someone disproving it.
Nural
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Peace to you,
I've read absolutely nothing that says not to mingle with the opposite sex in the Quran.
We must use our brains and not succumb to temptation, but unfortunately we are human beings and the desire is there.I cannot imagine trying to avoid all males. I would have to stay inside my whole life. Besides that, I wouldn't be able to work.
It all stems again from Arab and Asian (Pakistani and Afghan) culture where women and men do not normally mix. We have to point out to those who are getting culture mixed up with Islam to separate the two and go back to the one source that we should try to strive for -- knowledge of Quran. Of course they never will get it, sorry to say.
Also, sometimes I think that certain cultures teach men to fear women's sexuality, which in turn contributes to their oppression and maltreatment and this is another reason why some are saying not to mingle with males.
Perhaps they realise the immense power we women possess. lol -
The point you mentioned about wearing t-shirts and hijab - something I really find funny, is that 'muslims' girls at my college wear a hijab on top of a thin t-shirt type thing you were describing.
Hello Natu,
I thought Hijab was full body covering - so how do you know they were wearing thin shirts underneath the hijab? -)
I see you have a lot of distraction at your college -)
Perhaps thinking about whos wearing what underneath the hijab...I see how distracting it can be... -)
Regards,
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Salam Natu n all,
The way I see it, we need to look at the definition of 'mingling' in this context. If it involves casual physical contact that for example men have between themselves, e.g. pat on the back or hand shake then perhaps we are supposed to stay away from doing that, but talking to them and that - no prohibition whatsoever.
Khi- Again it depends with weht intention these physical acts r done. There is no direct prohibition of such acts even. The Quran means in tht verse NOT 2 STARE at tghe opposite sex i.e. dont lust after one another. If the physical touch is brother or sisterly then i dont see any probs. GOD Bless!
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The point you mentioned about wearing t-shirts and hijab - something I really find funny, is that 'muslims' girls at my college wear a hijab on top of a thin t-shirt type thing you were describing.
Hello Natu,
I thought Hijab was full body covering - so how do you know they were wearing thin shirts underneath the hijab? -)
I see you have a lot of distraction at your college -)
Perhaps thinking about whos wearing what underneath the hijab...I see how distracting it can be... -)
Regards,
shock shock shock
Lote tree, my man, u seriously got the wrong end of the stick! Ask Nural, I am nothing like that, I swear down brother, just ask Nural! What I was referring to as the hijab was one of those things they wear only to cover the head, lol i hope you get the picture! Sorry for the confusion tho.
(Jeez, I can't believe you thought that!)
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The point you mentioned about wearing t-shirts and hijab - something I really find funny, is that 'muslims' girls at my college wear a hijab on top of a thin t-shirt type thing you were describing.
Hello Natu,
I thought Hijab was full body covering - so how do you know they were wearing thin shirts underneath the hijab? -)
I see you have a lot of distraction at your college -)
Perhaps thinking about whos wearing what underneath the hijab...I see how distracting it can be... -)
Regards,
shock shock shock
Lote tree, my man, u seriously got the wrong end of the stick! Ask Nural, I am nothing like that, I swear down brother, just ask Nural! What I was referring to as the hijab was one of those things they wear only to cover the head, lol i hope you get the picture! Sorry for the confusion tho.
(Jeez, I can't believe you thought that!)
Little witty humour Natu nothing serious man, honest -) -)
You can ask Nural how much enjoy witty banter...I thought you would have responded with some wittiness yourself because your writing I found very amusing (amusing as in a entertaining and informative way....)
Relax...Humour is the sun that drives away the sadness from the human face...
Regards,
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Chill, witty humour good, tastes like chicken. Has Nural told you much about me?
Yeah. He said you are little crazy like me -)
but I think he is just jelous of our personality -) -)Regards,
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Peace!
lol I guess it does! Yoda isn't all wisdom though, he has his flaws too!
we should be quoting verses here, not opinions! P
I think the verse we can quote are those pertaining to 'lowering the gaze', though I still dont think I understand the true meaning of that verse, im skeptical as to the accuracy of the interpretations.
I think the verse warning others not to forbid what isn't forbidden is an important one, I intend to add the verse to this post as of when I find it.
in this case, I'm under the impression whoever thought it was forbidden bears the burden of proving their point, as its a case of proving a 'positive' rather than a 'negative' if you catch my drift. )
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in my personal understanding....what quran suggests is not to have secret relations which are hidden from parents or society. Cause in this case we are dealing with each individuals security matters. Its not because boy mixing with girls are considered something to be bad by default. I dont think if any couples touches each other thru understanding than it should be haram. If parents know abt their children's partners or who are they sharing...than its all cool. Just play the fair game. There is nothing to hide. And I see nothing wrong in 2 person loving or sharing their physical needs thru agreement.
peace
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bump
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I think the only verse we can talk a great deal about is that which tells the different sexes to lower their gaze (don't know exact numbers tho). I think God's pulled a clever one again, a short stament to give all the information we need. The perfect advice - No faffing about. So the contact shouldn't be too physical, but not limited in any other way. Thats my understanding anyway.
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peace to all,
yes i mingle........no i don't go beyond bounds.........i have to intermingle because i'm cleaning the offices of different companies.....gotta interact with people.........but it doesn't mean i have to "fool around" -
Peace,
I know this is your father and it maybe disrespectful to ask him but if someone claims that something is prohibited then they should show the evidence, rather than someone disproving it.
Nural
i agree with t is. if the father is so adamant that the quran prohibits it he should show his son the verse to put an end to any doubt.
logically why would there be a verse saying "mingling is allowed" anyway? it's not possible for the quran to list all things that are allowed, we don't expect to see statements to let us know that we can use pencils, eat pancakes, wear jeans, read email and so on
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Okay, I will take the pain to quote some translations related to the topic,
First from Quaran
024.030
YUSUFALI Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty that will make for greater purity for them And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do.
PICKTHAL Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do.
SHAKIR Say to the believing men that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts; that is purer for them; surely Allah is Aware of what they do.024.031
YUSUFALI And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss.For those of you who believe in Hadith
"Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative (mahram)" (Bukhari/Muslim).The Prophet (peace be upon him) also reportedly said, "Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan (Shaytan) is the third among them" (Tirmidhi).
I would not go into explaining the verses. I leave it up to the experts.