Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Users
Skins
  • Light
  • Brite
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Free Minds Forum Icon
  1. Home
  2. General Issues / Questions
  3. General Issues / Questions
  4. Arranged Marriages are an INJUSTICE?

Arranged Marriages are an INJUSTICE?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved General Issues / Questions
211 Posts 16 Posters 7.6k Views
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • T Offline
    T Offline
    Tahira
    wrote on last edited by
    #91

    Salam peacfulmuslim

    Depends on wether your'e an admirer of the face or physical appearance.

    If she s wearing a hijab you can't see either.

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • T Offline
      T Offline
      Tahira
      wrote on last edited by
      #92

      Salam SwedenMajidah

      I have 2 kids and surprise surprise they both turned out to be girls. You should have seen the look on my inlaws faces, they were expecting boys. They started praying for boys the day they found out i was pregnant. One is 12 now and the other 9.

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • U Offline
        U Offline
        unknownuser
        wrote on last edited by
        #93

        Hi Tahira,

        Depends on wether your'e an admirer of the face or physical appearance.
        If she s wearing a hijab you can't see either.

        U got me wrong. Is the 'physical appearance' the main or only criteria to fall in love?

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • U Offline
          U Offline
          unknownuser
          wrote on last edited by
          #94

          Hi,

          I was getting married when I was 17 and have 5 kids now.

          Wow!

          Well I don't believe in that hijjab rules at all, it's manmade.

          Quran tell us to be modest in our dressing. period.
          Hijab is a traditional custom branded 'islamic' by people themselves.

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • S Offline
            S Offline
            SwedenMajidah
            wrote on last edited by
            #95

            Salaam Pm,

            Quran tell us to be modest in our dressing. period.
            Hijab is a traditional custom branded 'islamic' by people themselves.

            YES I AGREE!!!!

            And I think the clothes like hijjab,jilbab and so on came from the desert Arabs because they wore that kind of clothes due to the rough climate.And then it spread to other groups too.It has nothing to do with Islam.

            Dressing modest can all do and modest differ from where you live.Modest in Uk don't have to be same as modest in SA.

            Peace Sis Majidah

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • T Offline
              T Offline
              Tahira
              wrote on last edited by
              #96

              Hi peacfulmuslim

              No, but it can help. Anyway I believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You and i might see someone who we think ugly but whoever fell in love with him/her would think otherwise. I know a few men (one of them my brother) who got married to women because they were beautiful(full stop) but those women (no offence to BEAUTIFUL and INTELLIGENT women)don't seem to have a tiny grain of intelligence in them. Some of them are stupid beyond belief, I mean they only have to open their mouths and all this rubbish pours out ,they make a scene out of everything and have to be the centre of attention.
              Clearly these men have only married them for their looks so they can parade their little trophies. My brother before he got married would say "i want a beautiful wife." " i would feel ashamed if i was seen with an ugly village girl".

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • T Offline
                T Offline
                Tahira
                wrote on last edited by
                #97

                SwedenMajidah

                Why did you have 5 kids? Just curious.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • T Offline
                  T Offline
                  TAJ
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #98

                  Peace All,

                  I was getting married when I was 17 and have 5 kids now.

                  Ma sha Allah, 5 Kids, God bless them )
                  But isn't giving birth really painful!?

                  A QUESTION FOR MOST MUSLIM MEN. How do you fall in love with a woman/girl wearing full hijab and covering her face? How can you fall in love if you can't see her. Imagine you guys marrying a girl and lifting her veil on the wedding night and she looks like something from the planet of the apes. Didn't Allah create each and every face different for a reason.

                  Planet of the apes!!?? And what is wrong with the apes!? I think that they are very beautiful creatures. I have a pic over my bed of Jeff Corwin exchanging a hug with an orangutan. She's so cute and was hugging him so lovingly. You should see her broad smile D I envy him so much, honestly. If only I can be in his place!

                  Ugliness is in the behaviour, never in the looks.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • W Offline
                    W Offline
                    warda
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #99

                    Salam people

                    If any one knows about forced/arranged marriage it s got to be me. I got thrown away(head first) into marriage when i was 16. I didn't have a clue about what was going on till 3 days before my wedding and when i objected i was told by mum that she'll rip up my passport and leave me in pakistan forever. At 16 i was scared to death. My inlaws weren't any help either, they expected me to cook clean and run the house like a perfect housewife ,oh and get pregnant very quickly. I stayed with them for nearly a year and hated every moment of it. I wasn't allowed to go anywhere by myself and would get told off for laughing or having fun.
                    My husband didn't stick up for me over there because my relatives and inlaws would always tell him lies about me but when he came here and experianced my life over here(which wasn't any better)things changed and now he's soooooooooooo perfect.
                    A QUESTION FOR MOST MUSLIM MEN. How do you fall in love with a woman/girl wearing full hijab and covering her face? How can you fall in love if you can't see her. Imagine you guys marrying a girl and lifting her veil on the wedding night and she looks like something from the planet of the apes. Didn't Allah create each and every face different for a reason.

                    Peace Tahira,

                    thank you for sharing your story with us. It is sad to see what people are able to do with others. How can one be that cruel to a 16 year old girl??? I just don't understand it!cry
                    But as far as I understood, you're out there now and life with your husband alone - Thank God!

                    My regards,
                    warda

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • U Offline
                      U Offline
                      unknownuser
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #100

                      Ugliness is in the behaviour, never in the looks.

                      Do not be so naive TAJ. Beauty is Beauty. The ancient poet Homer wrote in the Illiad of Helen's beauty as "Beauty, terrible beauty..." and John Keats would write "A Thing of Beauty is Joy forever". A person behaviour can be described as ugly but Beauty stands on its own....

                      http//kate.zed1.net/blog/wp-content/images/ugly3_01.jpg

                      Regards,

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • U Offline
                        U Offline
                        unknownuser
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #101

                        Anyway I believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

                        I think Beauty stands on its own.

                        You and i might see someone who we think ugly but whoever fell in love with him/her would think otherwise.

                        Falling in love is a very complex thing. Beauty stands on its own whether you fall in love with that beauty or not...

                        I know a few men (one of them my brother) who got married to women because they were beautiful(full stop) but those women (no offence to BEAUTIFUL and INTELLIGENT women)don't seem to have a tiny grain of intelligence in them. Some of them are stupid beyond belief

                        Stupidity does not make one ugly. It just makes you stupid.
                        But you could say Beauty without Intelligence is dull and boring just like a rose without its fragrance.

                        Clearly these men have only married them for their looks so they can parade their little trophies. My brother before he got married would say "i want a beautiful wife." " i would feel ashamed if i was seen with an ugly village girl".

                        Is it wrong to want Beauty in your life? Are we not all "captivated" by beauty?

                        Regards,

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • U Offline
                          U Offline
                          unknownuser
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #102

                          http//kate.zed1.net/blog/wp-content/images/ugly3_01.jpg

                          What a beauty

                          mate, I have fallen in love

                          can you please send me her contact details?

                          peace

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • U Offline
                            U Offline
                            unknownuser
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #103

                            Hi Tahira,

                            Hi peacfulmuslim
                            No, but it can help. Anyway I believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You and i might see someone who we think ugly but whoever fell in love with him/her would think otherwise. .

                            I agree with u, Tahira.
                            Physical appearance is just one aspect of a human being.
                            Beauty does lie in the eyes of the beholder.
                            When u do not know a person u meet, the physical appearance makes a mark coz thats the only thing u know and hence stands out. But once u get to know a person, the 'person' in him/her stands out while the physical appearance takes a backseat. And the person with a good soul becomes beautiful.
                            And falling in love doesnt hold the physical beauty aspect most significant. If one does fall in love with a person, on account of the physical beauty alone, they are not really in love with the person coz physical beauty is only one tiny aspect of a humanbeing. And they are gonna be very disappointed when they realise that the actual 'person' in her/him would affect him/her in a significant magnitude lot more than the physical beauty would. And he/she would also be disappointed as the physical beauty they fell in love with slowly fades with with time. Beauty of the soul never does. It grows stronger with time.

                            Clearly these men have only married them for their looks so they can parade their little trophies. My brother before he got married would say "i want a beautiful wife." " i would feel ashamed if i was seen with an ugly village girl".

                            Yeah. If humans were mere show objects, only physical beauty would suffice. But as human beings, we have larger roles and purpose and essence/meaning. Physical Beauty can only have a tiny share of importance in a larger picture of life.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • U Offline
                              U Offline
                              unknownuser
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #104

                              Hi sis Taj
                              Peace All,

                              I was getting married when I was 17 and have 5 kids now.

                              Ma sha Allah, 5 Kids, God bless them )
                              But isn't giving birth really painful!?

                              I know sis. I went 'wow' when I heard that too. 5 kids is lots. But I guess some women have the strength and reason to do what they do.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • U Offline
                                U Offline
                                unknownuser
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #105

                                What a beauty
                                mate, I have fallen in love
                                can you please send me her contact details?
                                peace

                                Beauty in the Eye of the Beholder?
                                I think not!

                                But Perhaps Australians after 8 pints of Castlemaine XXXX would be able to find beauty in that picture or any picture wink

                                Just kiddin -)

                                Regards,

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • S Offline
                                  S Offline
                                  SwedenMajidah
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #106

                                  Salaam all,

                                  I have 5 kids for many reasons. Allah swt have granted me with them and believe me or not I was trying to protect me from being pregnant after my third child but Allah wanted something else.

                                  I love all of my kids but I'm not a perfect mom and if I was young today and ready to get married I had wished that I had only one or two kids.

                                  It is painful to give birth to a baby but that pain disappear when u see the beautiful face of your newborn child it's an incredible feeling Alhamdulillah.

                                  Peace Sis Majidah

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    Jaxal
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #107

                                    SaLaM SM

                                    In 3rd world countries, men actually try to get women pregnant so that they hve no choice but to stay in marriage. Women are simply better than men.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • U Offline
                                      U Offline
                                      unknownuser
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #108

                                      Women are simply better than men.

                                      Aye chap! They are not just wee better but are fantastic (Margaret Thatcher is excluded from this because she was not really a women!
                                      -) wink

                                      Regards,

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • S Offline
                                        S Offline
                                        SwedenMajidah
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #109

                                        Salaam Jaxal,

                                        Thanks Jaxal, Yes we are great D

                                        Peace Sis Majidah

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • U Offline
                                          U Offline
                                          unknownuser
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #110

                                          Salaam Jaxal,

                                          Thanks Jaxal, Yes we are great D

                                          Peace Sis Majidah

                                          Please there is no need to blow your own Trumpet wink

                                          Regards,

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
                                          Reply
                                          • Reply as topic
                                          Log in to reply
                                          • Oldest to Newest
                                          • Newest to Oldest
                                          • Most Votes


                                          • Login

                                          • Don't have an account? Register

                                          • Login or register to search.
                                          • First post
                                            Last post
                                          0
                                          • Categories
                                          • Recent
                                          • Users