InterFaith Marriage. Would You Do It? Have you done It?
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Peace Keeley
I think I explained my outlook on the Trinity here http//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=8744.15
He's Egyptian. His parents are thrilled. The Qu'ran says that people have the right to choose their spouse. And that chaste, believing women of the people of the book are allowed to him as well. His parents and I had a chance to talk several times before the Nikkah, and the impression I got from them was pretty much that they wanted someone for their son who would care for him, make him happy, help him to take care of his family, and crank out a couple of grandkids. (Because all parents want to be grandparents...revenge you know >D )
As he intends to remain in America, it's probably easier for them to hold that perspective. Maybe things would be different in Egypt.
Yeah we call each other Habibi. There's even the "Special Tone" he uses when he knows he's done something that's going to bother me.
So I take it that you believe that Jesus is not God, but still hold the Trinity? Sounds like my mom, but I think she is veering off the Trinity part with more conversations we have, but she still prays to Jesus, due to the "No man cometh to the Father but by me" intercession.
Im not quite sure where to put this next response, here or the other thread, but Ill put it here. I dont mean to intrude but if I get annoying let me know. Im just curious and not quite sure if I get the concept right. You state that Jesus is half of Mary, if you take the genetic part, and half of God. Does that make God a man, since you say Father? Also, what is your belief on made in Gods image? Also, what of Adam since he had no mother or father?
From the way I understand it, when Muslims are disrespectful to Jews or Christians, I think its because they see that they deviated. Christians, due to the fact that they are no longer People of the Book because most believe that Jesus is God. Jews...I think its more political. What I find odd is that Jews and Muslims have beliefs that are so similar, compared to mainstream Christians, that you would think they would be friends. Oddly enough, Jews and Christians are the friends. Also, the Quran states that the closest friend to the Muslim is the Christian, but again its talking about the Unitarian (?) ones IMO, since later it talks about those that worship Jesus and Mary and puts them in another category.
It seems you are very open minded and I respect that. Im also glad that his parents love you as well, as Ive read the other stories on this board of the opposite. I think he is very lucky to have you. Marking the qibla? Wow...If I ever marry a "Person of the Book" I hope she is that accepting, God Willing.
Peace
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Jews and Christians are friends largely through a Shared Zionist belief. Jesus, and his position as the Messiah, or Son of God or Lunatic, or whatever is a point of history and its easier to simply agree to disagree.
Palestine, Israel, and the "Holy Land" in general is a very tangible real topic smothered in violence and wrongdoing on all sides..and is not something about which Muslims and Jews can simply agree to disagree.
My husband, before our marriage met a friend of mine who is Jewish. She thought to corner him on the sticky issue and said "What do you think of Palestine?" interested in hearing him spout the anti-semetic rhetoric she expected.
Instead he said, "Palestine? No such country. What is this Palestine?"
She seemed mildly surprised and was about to say so before he said with a smile, "The whole area is Egypt, don't you know? We're just waiting for the U.S. to leave."
He was joking, and only said that to throw her off (I swear that's his favorite thing to do). The Arab world needs to fulfill their zakat and start taking care of their "precious" Palestinians instead of paying them to be suicide bombers and deporting them. Whatever the right way to solve the conflict...there will be no winner, just one side loses more than the other.
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Instead he said, "Palestine? No such country. What is this Palestine?"
She seemed mildly surprised and was about to say so before he said with a smile, "The whole area is Egypt, don't you know? We're just waiting for the U.S. to leave."
I dont quite understand the joke.
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Egypt and Israel had a little falling out over the ownership ofthe Sinai region affectionately called "the 6 Days War" Essentially, Israel showed up on the field with a lot of bigger, badder friends (US included) but Egypt did get Sinai back. Compromise. Granted, Egypt was among the first Arab nations to recognize Israel as a nation. Though among many people is a general feeling that Israel was once part of Egypt.
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Egypt and Israel had a little falling out over the ownership ofthe Sinai region affectionately called "the 6 Days War" Essentially, Israel showed up on the field with a lot of bigger, badder friends (US included) but Egypt did get Sinai back. Compromise. Granted, Egypt was among the first Arab nations to recognize Israel as a nation. Though among many people is a general feeling that Israel was once part of Egypt.
I know about the 6 Day War, however I dont understand how was Israel part of Egypt? And what did he mean by saying "We are waiting for the US to leave"?
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Inter-faith marriage....
Been there...done that!
My conclusion
There is no such thing as problems in "inter-faith" marriages. The problems arise because of "inter-personality" marriages.
Well I think what I am trying to say is that you can make anything work if you both work in synch and are tolerant and patient. If not ... then even a same faith relationship can head for disaster.
Would I do it again? I would allow my kids for inter-faith marriages as long as they are mature enough to suss out their partner's personalities...then should not be any problems that they both cannot overcome.
BTW would a marriage between Traditional Islam follower and Quran only follower be considered "inter-faith"?
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Well I married a Sunni girl... D
I think me and my wife does have a different "Faith" by the time we were married. DBy the time we were married, she still believes of all the superstitious stuff from the "Book Of Gossips" written by Bukhari and Muslim..
Right now I think I've made her a Sunni Murtadeen... Oops.. watch out for the stoning honey! DBut we get along so well, and decided to raise our childrens in a Non-Sectarian manners.
I hope you all raised yours in such manners too..
Salam
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But we get along so well, and decided to raise our childrens in a Non-Sectarian manners.
I hope you all raised yours in such manners too..
Salam
Well I converted to "Islam" upon marriage. Tried to raise my kids as he wanted. He became little extreme, intolerant and fanatic due to several reasons. I still continued following the path he "chose" for me. I had so many questions, I could not even ask myself those questions...for fear that God would hate me if I did. I mean it was ingrained that if I questioned, I would become non-believer. I was not even sure if I believed in anything anymore. Suddenly my eldest started to ask questions, I could not answer. My husband was putting irrational fear in her. She was becoming withdrawn and scared. Anyway, circumstances led me to various sites and people and here and now I have no fear...neither has my daughter...and I am getting some answers that finally make sense to me....and in such a simple way that I am able to explain to my kids.
Pity that my husband still stuck in his hole ...
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I know about the 6 Day War, however I dont understand how was Israel part of Egypt? And what did he mean by saying "We are waiting for the US to leave"?
The joke is if the jews can claim a country because it belonged to them thousands of years ago, Egyptians too have the right to claim this same country which belonged to them even before it belonged to the jews. As for "waiting for the Americans to leave", I think he means that Israel is a political entity that came in this area and is staying by the support of the US. Once the US "leaves", i.e stops the support, this political entity, aka Israel, is no more.
(sorry for going OT).
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yay a topic I feel like talking about!
A couple years after I first converted 8 years ago I was all set to marry a man from Bangladesh. We had been classmates and I had worked for his mother for 3 years. His family knew my family and my mother eventually worked with his mother as well. His parents said no, because I was American. nevermind that I was Muslim......
We gave up trying to convince his parents after a year or so.
A few months later I was "wooed" by a guy I worked with ( I had two jobs) at a bookstore. We had known eachother for several years before we decided to give it a try. He was very interested in Islam and we talked about religion often. We married 3 years later. He was raised Episcopalian, but not particularly religious, not much of a holy trinity kind of guy. Our marriage is great. He read the Quran when I am distressed in attempts to find something that will comfort me. He tries to make sure that foods contain no pork or pork products ( he sometimes fails- but he really does try hard!) He engages in some of the best religious discussions I have ever had. He convinced me that I should get my Masters ( oh yeah -I need to share my Thesis with you all... it is about most of the topics on this website and how free-minds Muslims try to form a community online- but I digress). And we will teach our children Islam as well as other religions when it is time for that. We both believe in leading by example and allowing them to choose for themselves.
Hi parents are wonderful.... both professors- his mother teaches English as a second language to primarily Muslim students and knows alot about Islam because of it. I could have asked for a more excepting family-in-law.
My husband and I have much more in common that me and that guy from Bangladesh..... so things worked out for the best in the end.
We have been married two years now and I couldn't be happier- well, I could but that has nothing to do with him. -
Joie,
Such a nice story! Sounds like a great marriage. One of my best friends is in a situation where she and a guy are in love but she is Muslim and her parents are strongly opposed to their union, because he is not. He is Korean and his family is strongly opposed because she is not. Its such a shame because they seem made for each other and are so happy together, but neither wants to go against their parents. Its funny how those things go...her mother was a convert from a Christian family and they were upset when she married her Muslim father, but now 30 years later, the mother is giving the same kind of support (which is none) that her parents gave her, and even told her she felt like a failure as a parent because he daughter considered marrying a non-Muslim.
I am a convert too, I think I would prefer for my children to marry Muslims, but I'd rather them marry a GOOD person of any kind and I certainly wouldn't shun them or not speak to them and although I can't say since I'm not in that situation, I don't think I would feel like a failure. I know many people Muslims, Christians who are married to someone who would be considered the same faith as them, but they still don't worship or practice the same way.
A couple years ago before I was married (my husband and I were high school sweethearts and in a relationship for about 11 years before we were married) another friends mother told me that the reason that I had such a long engagement is because my father wasn't Muslim and a Muslim father would never let his daughter be in a relationship that long without being married. I had to nicely inform her that my Christian father and mother were very supportive of my relationship and they had been married for 35 years and were still very much in love. The irony is that the woman telling me this had been married and divorced twice and my non-Muslim parents had been married to each other for so long. Nothing against divorced people at all, my point is just that all these lables just lead to judgements and misconceptions. The bottom line is that every case is different. I believe that Allah loves good people of all kinds. Maybe that thinking is kind of simplistic, but that's how I feel.
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Peace everyone,
When my husband and I married 5 years ago I had been christian my whole life... my husband had been muslim his whole life. About 6 months into the marriage I read the entire Quran... I was expecting to better understand my husband's religion. What I got was a whole new way of life.
God works in ways we can't even imagine. I accepted Islam after our first year of marriage... all because my husband was willing to marry a christian woman. God bless him more and more.
Dotty
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Peace,
Nice story Dotty!
My opinion now is that we shall not look too much on only the religious likeness but instead try to find someone who match our own personality.
It's harder to change someones personality than to change someones beliefs and outlook.Maria
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As Salaam Alaikum,
What do you think of interfaith marriages?
Would you marry a Christian or Jew?
Have you married one? Did it work out? If not, would you marry a non-Muslim again?
I don't think that I will marry a non-Muslim, no offense. I think that it would be too hard and it would be hard to raise my kids Muslims, if my husband doesn't make salat, read the Quran, etc,etc. And with times like these, in a way, I really feel that I need a Muslim spouse to understand me and what I go through in my Muslim Idenitity Crisis. lol.
what do you think?
salaam
Peace.
I don't think I could marry a non-Muslim woman. If I did, it would probably plague my mind as long as I was with her. Then I also think about what if I had kids? That would be a complex situation. I don't like the idea. peace -
Peace.
I don't think I could marry a non-Muslim woman. If I did, it would probably plague my mind as long as I was with her. Then I also think about what if I had kids? That would be a complex situation. I don't like the idea. peaceThere is no choice in this case .
The Quran prohibits Muslim men from marrying unbelievers and associators, saying that it is better for them to marry believing women. And do not marry the ...
jedi -
There is no choice in this case .
The Quran prohibits Muslim men from marrying unbelievers and associators, saying that it is better for them to marry believing women. And do not marry the ...
jediYeah, I know.