sex before marriage
-
Well, the chances that one ends up with a partner they fall in love, is less than 5% in an arranged marriage.
The odds are only as good as the first person u meet on the street today.
so, I guess, its always better to get out of it if one can, but the sad reality is not all can. Its a strange complex muddle. -
-
salamm
Loooooll
Is this a southern expression. Not in any northern dictionary!
regards -
Aalaikum salaam
Lol= laughigh out loudly wink
-
Salam.
Ok. dating's fine with me. But what i wanted to say was, that if dating goes to o far, then marriage becomes pointless. If you're going to live together, have sex, have children, then it doesnt make any difference whether your married or not. And the reason that's bad is because being married gives people a sense of committment (if your already married, might as well work on it), but if you're just "dating," then you dont have that committment, and you dont care that much about splitting up. That's what I wanted to say. And that is only my opinion based on my 16 year experience with life.But i do agree with you, getting to know someone you're gonna marry is much better than having an arranged marriage. But, then again, if you feel that the "arranged" person is right for you, and you know him/her well, then i dont think an "arranged" marriage is such a bad idea.
And Jaxal, i think i'm gonna go through the same thing in a few years. wink
-
Peace to all
sorry I only read the first 4 pages and here is my notes
- In the Islamic marriage, simply the husband has to pay 2 things
commonly known as
"Shabkah"
"Mahr"
the Shabkah is a gift to the bride
The Mahr is given to the bride family to help in building the new house for the two, i.e. the Mahr paid by the Husband is just a share in the cost of building the house "furniture etc, etc", the family of the woman MUST also pay their share to prepare the house, it works roughly like 50%, 50%, but whoeever have money should pay more for sure
so it is not a fee to sleep with the woman, there is no such thing that inclination as such
as far as I know Zani and Zania, covers married and unmarried humans
the forgivness promised in the verse posted by Taj, is for the prostitutes who were forced into prostitution
the logic that desperation makes prostitution ok, is funny and will not stand any sense as exctracted from the Quran, I will try to find a few verses later, in fact based on that flawed logic, murder due to desperation should be OK, or any crime due to desperation should be ok
prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race at least, the prostitute can transfer diseases to many men on one day or one of the customers transfer it to the prostitute then the prostitute transfer it to many men and it will keep going
prostitution also destroys families including children
a male or a female prostitute are definitly bound to hell unless they repent
peace to all
-
Peace be upon you AhmedBahgat,
Peace to all
the Shabakah is a gift to the prideThe Mahr is given to the pride family to help in building the new house for the two, i.e. the Mahr paid by the Husband is just a share in the cost of building the house "furniture etc, etc", the family of the woman MUST also pay their share to prepare the house, it works roughly like 50%, 50%, but whoeever have money should pay more for sure
Just a minor correction done for you. It's bride. Gift to the pride and pride family just sounded wrong. Apologies for nit-picking. Communication is a powerful tool. We don't want people who are linguistically declined in English to get the wrong idea.
prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race at least, the prostitute can transfer diseases to many men on one day or one of the customers transfer it to the prostitute then the prostitute transfer it to many men and it will keep going
prostitution also destroys families including children
a male or a female prostitute are definitly bound to hell unless they repent
peace to all
If prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race, then why is it theoretically one of the oldest known professions? The human race sure seems well protected with prostitution in its place. As far as I know, even safe sex is encouraged at brothels. Prostitutes are even sent for checkups, courtesy of their pimps. Sort of like, they want to keep their goods in good condition until wear and tear occurs. So theoretically again, prosititution is "safer", well at least here in Singapore. As much as we may want to protect the human race from such adversities, we cannot stop them from going on. The more we protect, the more another will overcome the protection. The more we forbid it, the more the sexually deprave human will want it. That is what actually will keep going. On our end, just educate the people we know about such things and hope they don't go get jiggy with those prostitutes. If they choose to, then too bad. Just safeguard ourselves. I suppose that will suffice. Feel free to share your views. Cheers.
-
Peace to all
Here is a verse from the Quran that will prove beyond doubt that Zani or Zania also covers the single people
?Let no man guilty of adultery or fornication marry and but a woman similarly guilty, or an Unbeliever nor let any but such a man or an Unbeliever marry such a woman to the Believers such a thing is forbidden.?
(3)
-> Can you figure it out from the above?, let me explain, it is really simple
-> Allah is telling us that the Zani DOES NOT MARRY BUT A ZANIA LIKE HIM OR A MUSHRIKA and the Zania DOES NOT MARRY BUT A ZANI LIKE HER OR A MUSHRIK
I.E. the Quran described single humans as being Zani or Zania
I reckon the above verse should refute that argument for good
Peace to all
-
Peace be upon you AhmedBahgat,
Peace to all
the Shabakah is a gift to the prideThe Mahr is given to the pride family to help in building the new house for the two, i.e. the Mahr paid by the Husband is just a share in the cost of building the house "furniture etc, etc", the family of the woman MUST also pay their share to prepare the house, it works roughly like 50%, 50%, but whoeever have money should pay more for sure
Just a minor correction done for you. It's bride. Gift to the pride and pride family just sounded wrong. Apologies for nit-picking. Communication is a powerful tool. We don't want people who are linguistically declined in English to get the wrong idea.
thank you bro, no apologies required, I actually suffer from a spelling disorder big times, I lived a couple of years in the states before I moved to australia 15 years ago, hence I have 17 years experience talking english, but typing was far less lol
prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race at least, the prostitute can transfer diseases to many men on one day or one of the customers transfer it to the prostitute then the prostitute transfer it to many men and it will keep going
prostitution also destroys families including children
a male or a female prostitute are definitly bound to hell unless they repent
peace to all
If prostitution is forbidden "logically" to protect the human race, then why is it theoretically one of the oldest known professions?
I believe for two main reasons
- Sex is one of the biggest Fitna "Test" Allah has forced unto us
- Humans don't abide by Allah's laws
The human race sure seems well protected with prostitution in its place.
I don't mean extinction rather living this life while suffering from a huge list of STDs, sure the human race has weaken, I'm sure they used to live longer in the past
As far as I know, even safe sex is encouraged at brothels. Prostitutes are even sent for checkups, courtesy of their pimps.
sure, Satan is doing a great job, he makes prostitution look great for many humans, have you ever watched Jerry Springer
Jerry, Jerry, Jerry lol
Sort of like, they want to keep their goods in good condition until wear and tear occurs. So theoretically again, prosititution is "safer", well at least here in Singapore.
well, then I will just take it as an order from my God and I have to abide by it, like the pig meat, you know it tastes good and seems no harm in it but Allah has prohibited it so I have to abide by it, you see this life is nothing but a TEST
As much as we may want to protect the human race from such adversities, we cannot stop them from going on. The more we protect, the more another will overcome the protection. The more we forbid it, the more the sexually deprave human will want it. That is what actually will keep going. On our end, just educate the people we know about such things and hope they don't go get jiggy with those prostitutes. If they choose to, then too bad. Just safeguard ourselves. I suppose that will suffice. Feel free to share your views. Cheers.
true, but the point is we are living a test, and this is a very serious context, especially if the Examiner is a very powerful entity that most of us if not all can not comprehend Its Might
Peace bro and please feel free to fix my spelling lol
-
Hello,
My marriage was arranged, after 10 days of seeing each other for the first time me and my wife fully married, now we live together for 15 years, we have a beautiful 14 years old girl (Sara) and 18 months old boy (Noor El Deen) and we love each other to death, I really prefer arranged marriage, but i have to say success rate is not that high, we were just lucky that we are compatible
peace
-
Peace Ahmed,
You really prefer arranged marriages ? You recognize yourself that you were lucky!
I think though that there might be one positive point to arranged (not forced) marriages Romantic expectations don't run to high and as such wont be shattered...
LK
-
Peace Ahmed,
Peace Elke
You really prefer arranged marriages ?
Possibly I?m influenced with my own successful experience
You recognize yourself that you were lucky!
I honestly don?t believe in luck, I just said it in a common way, the general rule for matching the couples were mentioned in the Quran
?Vile women are for vile men, and vile men for vile women. Good women are for good men, and good men for good women; such are innocent of that which people say For them is pardon and a bountiful provision.?
(26)
-> The above verse was sort of assurance to me that if I?m good then most likely my wife will be a good person, if I?m bad then I would expect my wife to be a bad person, but for every rule there is exceptions for sure
I think though that there might be one positive point to arranged (not forced) marriages Romantic expectations don't run to high and as such wont be shattered...
There was no forcing whatsoever in my case, it was my choice and hers
Peace
-
hi Elke,
peacefulmuslim, where did you get your percentages from ? lol
They sound right though...I made up those percentages based on what I have seen around me. And trust me, I have seen loads coz in the society I come from ' arranged marriage is the only norm' among all generations. u get a clear picture when u live with the couple under the same roof.
-
hI Ahmed,
Possibly I?m influenced with my own successful experience
yeah, u r right. I have seen some couples who have an arranged marriage and discover that their partner is the ideal one for them. But this happens only in less than 5% of the cases.
You recognize yourself that you were lucky!
I honestly don?t believe in luck, I just said it in a common way, the general rule for matching the couples were mentioned in the Quran
The verse was sort of assurance to me that if I?m good then most likely my wife will be a good person, if I?m bad then I would expect my wife to be a bad person, but for every rule there is exceptions for sure.I cant agree on that one coz I have seen loads of wonderful people stuck with incompatible partners and in miserable marriages.
U have been lucky, indeed.
Allah also tells us to choose our partner based on virtue, Doesnt He? I dont remember the verse but I have read it. so, that would imply Allah tells us to choose our partner.
And arranged marriage is a huge gamble. u r one of the very few lucky ones! -
Arranged marriages are a source for unhappiness and injustice in a person's life. If you're going to commit to one person for the rest of your life (ideally) it better be one you actually love and that loves you back.
-
Salaam PM
I have seen some couples who have an arranged marriage and discover that their partner is the ideal one for them. But this happens only in less than 5% of the cases.
Wow! and over 90% of arrranged married couples are living an unhappy existance. Where has this 5% come from.
Salaam -
SaLaM stillearning
Loooll its a joke. I guess it sounds better when said instead of written. But i tried.Its hard to make some people laugh Jaxal wink
Arranged marriages hold because there is a social stigma attached to divorce in these societies...even though those marriages are terrible.
Regards,