Strip clubs?!
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The thing is that during the dance, we did some sex positions and she was sitting on me but obviously my trousers were zipped up etc ...... OH GOD I know i did wrong and ill never get a dance again .. never ever again!
Ammar Ammar....please forgive me http//i73.photobucket.com/albums/i231/nabpeace/people-more/peoples_223.gifand please come out of it young man.
peace
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Elke, OPF, I have to disagree.
Where do you folks get your statistics, most involve organized crime, 90% were sexually abused??
I know a few strippers, quite a few of them did it for the money, the one I'm closest with did it to pay for University tuition, not because she was forced into it by the mafia. She also came from a decent family. Let's face it, you can earn big money stripping for a week instead of waiting on tables at a restaurant. I believe this is the case for strippers in developed countries where this activity is legal and thus government regulated. And also OPF the girls I know who were sexually abused did not turn out to be strippers, the girls who were strippers weren't sexually abused. Where did you get the 90%?
The Czech Republic, where our friend got his lap dance is an EU member country. European Union laws applies on the rights of workers applies. I doubt they were forced into it by organized crime. Similarly, having live in another EU country, the Netherlands, where not only strip clubs are legal but also prostitution, i can attest that it is done out of will, the stripping and prostitution industry is also heavily regulated by the government and the sex workers are taxed!
Now, I'm living back in Malaysia, I can tell you that organized crime here is heavily involved in the sex industry, smuggling in girls from poorer neighboring countries. This is a country that bans brothels, prostitution and strip clubs. This is usually the case, when you ban and make something illegal, Organized crime fills in the void in the market, it becomes an underground industry. You had the same situation in the US when they banned alcohol during the prohibition years. I'm for legalization of brothels, prostitution and strip clubs. At least with this, the government can regulate the industry thus make it safer simply by having it out in the open. Even though morally and religiously it's wrong.
In the Netherlands, there's a lot of health and safety government regulations on sex workers, even down to sordid things like "shaving sex", which until today I have no idea what that it, neither did the sex worker.
Wer sind die Deutschen auf diesem Forum?
Ich spreche deutsch, aber ich beginne zu vergessen, niemand in meinem Land spreche es. Trotzdem mein bester Freund ist ein berliner, mein "ex girlfriend" ist ein ?sterreicher, so ?be ich manchmal mit ihnen. But damn do you guys have a difficult language.
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Rumi, I specifically put a question mark after 90% because I wasn't sure of the exact figure.
http//www.icasa.org/uploads/adult_survivors_of_incest.pdf
66%.
I think this statistic originated from the netherlands. Sex workers is a broad term however, I don't think most strippers are being forced at all.
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Peace rumi, don't look at me like that LOL
what statistics ?
I said many and usually, don't think i even said most....
anyway, if they are not forced into it by criminal organization, most are by drugs (criminal organization not far...) and the men using them are still profiting.
About organized crime yes i believe that in bigger cities these places are organized. Now i do not have any figures to rely on, but i know about the Russian connection in Nice for example
ok, some or many of these girls might know what they get into, but even then, they should be able to get out and i don't think they can.
also i don't think that legalizing brothels prostitution aso will lead to a better organisation by the state of these activities, there would still be a lot of "underground" like girls with an official contract but how did one get them to sign it...
i know that not all are victims, some just don't care and see it as an easy way to make a living. (can it be easy ? ???)
peace
lk -
Well I do know that strip clubs are wrong and will never support them but when ur with friends then its a bit hard ... My friends are good! No one really forced me to get a dance and no one can ever force me! ...
The thing is that during the dance, we did some sex positions and she was sitting on me but obviously my trousers were zipped up etc ... OH GOD I know i did wrong and ill never get a dance again .. never ever again!
I think Allah will understand cus its a natural temptation but believe me, I will never have sex before marriage and thats my stern principle!
Seems like you had quite an entertaining experience that taught you some lessons. Temptations can lead to harm out of sheer excitement if not understood and must be carefully exercised each time you rise and fall. It is no sin to fall into mud but a disgrace to remain therein. Take care! peace -
Peace ammarb87 ,
Hey I'm not going to knock anyone else's comments and advices to you about this but I have a few words for you.
I know it is hard. I'm a young Afro-American guy and our culture is very macho and I suffered through people trying to call me a homosexual because I wasn't that interested in making pursuing and glaring at females my top occupation. So I know what it feels like when you are trying to be righteous and the whole time being emasculated by your own community for trying to be righteous in the aspect of sex. So I am not going to give you a guilt trip as it is not the end of the world. But I also know why you told everyone here. You know that it is really none of our business but when you live in a society that congratulates you for committing indecencies like this and approves of you and your worth as a man when you commit these kinds of acts then you have to tell someone who will help you feel like it is wrong, because the longer you are around people who congratulate you for these things the more you think that it is okay and that it is even right somehow, and justified.I think many of us here can sympathize with you. Now marriage is good but it is definitely not the same as going to a strip club and somewhat having your way with a woman and then leaving no strings attatched. The bad thing about strip clubs is that you are tempting yourself and maybe even God (in the Jewish sense of the phrase). You are around drunkeness, immorality and even prostitution as strip clubs are also most definitely centers of prostitution and those girls most times definitely have pimps. So yeah you are having fun with the guys but let it happen more than once and it will definitely turn into more and you will see how you are stepping through a door to even worse habits. I know it is not fun being alone and it feels good and right to feel like a virile young man along with your guy friends but it will easily lead to other habits all the way until you realize, 'What have i sunk into.' I'm not not one to publicize everything I've done or seen but believe me, I just pray you and God that you don't feel curious to try this road once you know what it is.
To get back to marriage, marriage is not easy and it is certainly not an only-for-sex relationship. It is rare to find the woman who is fuly-confident in herself and her husband. No, believe me most woman have their bad habits, insecurities and many, may illogical reactions many times to very simple things. But sex is definitely a benefit and sexual relationships are usually more fulfilling in long-term relationships and when you actually love (and at the same time lust after) your partner.
So I do recommend marriage but you also have to be able to coexist, comprimise, set limits and interact daily with your wife (unless you have some sort of long distance marriage). But it is in no waaaaaay equivlant to sexual satsifaction only. There may even be times where you are so displeased with your wife that you don't even want to have relations with her, that won't happen with a random girl or a stripper but you don't know that girl and are actually doing (and can do) more harm to her and yourself than you realize.So in the end i would do my best if I were you to wean myself from those friends, and alot of the negative aspect of your immediate culture that define your manhood in this way. It has been a process for me as well. You should really try to strengthen your thankfulness, love and faith for God. I know no-one wants to be like Ned Flanders from the Simpsons either but if you can find some Muslims, Jews or even Christians with a head on their shoulders and who also strive towards morality like you, you may find some comfort there. Try to look for good people who do their best to be moral, but beware of the extremist, the idol-worshippers and the hypocrites in whatever religion they come, they will drag you to the opposite extreme which you will find is no more based on faith, love, thankfulness and submission to God than those guys who go out to strip clubs, get drunk and look to gather their modern day harems or get laid or close to it. Yes what you did was wrong, but realize that you will do more wrong to yourself by going back and letting those "friends" get to you. Try to find your manhood in God, rather than women or the words of ungodly peers.
Godbless,
Anwar -
Peace,
Nice post Br Anwar!
Maria
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Salam.
I'm your friend, brother.
I'm a 29-year-old virgin and can't wait to get married because at least i will have something to look forward in the marriage when and if it comes - not just sex. InshaAllah.You have many friends here, brother, brothers and sisters, we're all here for your support. But do keep up the prayer that will keep you away from the strip clubs and bad people. InshaAllah.
Peace.
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I hate strip clubs.
It is expensive, the girls are nasty and you don't get the job done.
Get a girl, give her jewerly, she ll pretty much have to give you more than just a blowjob if that is what you are looking for.
Is it a sin to have sex? Get real, animals sniff the anus for gender identity and stick it where it should be. It's something like tetris. Your dog doesn't go through the process of humping only those who are Muslims. Chances are he' ll hump my leg if he really needs to.
So why would you feel bad if you go to a strip club? The God rule was there and something in you said to ignore it and go on. Humans are stupid when it comes to God and what is right or wrong. If you want to achieve an errection you don't really have to be attracted to Muslim girls only. And what does an errection tell you? That you penis is willing any moment.
Why would you put your dingdong through an unecessary process of limitating it from some action because you are just not married?
I guess God wants us to be married before we have sex, but do you even have the slighest idea how your life will be if you are married to a woman. You need a REAL JOB and a REAL CAR HOUSE and by the time you are 40 you SIR CAN GET MARRIED! WOOHOO !!! So stupid...
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peace
Is it a sin to have sex? Get real, animals sniff the anus for gender identity and stick it where it should be. It's something like tetris. Your dog doesn't go through the process of humping only those who are Muslims. Chances are he' ll hump my leg if he really needs to.
okey, we're not animals.
now ammarb87, don't feel bad, it could have been worse, you were with a naked woman and you didn't do anything more then look, it's not like you had sex with her and you didn't go looking for sex after that.
but i never saw in the entire quran that God will send to hell people who look at girls. -
Peace,
Weinmar, that was pretty bad. Maybe you should take back your post, it makes you look pretty immoral. You don't have to but I'm sure you don't want people to think of you the way your post makes you seem.
Godbless,
AnwarI read that post a couple of times and couldn't figure out where weinmar was coming from. Thanks for making that clear for me anwar.
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Hi guys,
ammarb87 feels bad that he commited adultry when he went to spend money and time looking at naked chicks at the strip club.
He is in a middle of two strong currents. Current number 1 is the will to see the female naked body and no man can resist that. Current number 2 is people making it such a big sin to go to stip clubs.
ammarb87 wants to touch to satisfy some of his sexual desires, but also skeptical if he is being a bad person with God. The idea of burning in hell disturbes his desire to have a lap dance, and the same idea is being converted to regret which leads only far to pessimisticism.
I say, if you want to do something, do it correctly or don't that way you pick a side and move on with your life. If you decide to "sin" you are better off doing it all the way or if you are think you should be good with God then don't do it at all. Always move on.
When it comes to sex, it is funny that only human beings are so complex about how to pass their offsprings. We are animals and that is a fact. What makes us worse than animals is our brain's complexity. Our brains evolved and got better than any other specie that it is scary sometimes.
If you are a guy, and you achieve an errection, that is your primitive side demanding sex. Your primitive side is filtred before you decide to act. You think that you are not an animal and you must not act like one. You wish to believe that by marrying one special girl you are doing what is lawful and moral. You choose a religion to filter your primitive desire to reproduce and limiting the inputs for your output (if you catch my drift).
Thats the whole idea of what is sinful sex. An errection is an errection and it doesn't mean that an errection is only accomplished once you are married. It is there for a purpose not because it is time to get married, but it is time to make some kids. Its our natural instict and we are a dominating race. We want to reproduce so our specie lives more than any other.
We help sick people, put retards in rehabilitation and save people under surgery. We want to live more and more and that crap is unatural. A sick elephant is a lion's dinner.
I had enough, some one finish this for me please lol
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Weinmar,
Please, I am not on the politically correct bandwagon, BUT calling people with special needs "retards" is unacceptable.
dotty
I think we call them retards to distinguish them as lesser then the regular. Call them mentally challenged or special people but my point is still about them.
Didn't you feel good as a kid to make fun of them? Didn't you hit them and curse at them? Didn't it make you feel good at all?
You only don't want to make fun of them because you don't wish to be like them. AHH! If I make fun of them, God will curse me and be like them
While I really feel bad for their disability, you find retards to be the happiest people in earth. They enjoy everything unlike you and me.
-peace
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And who is more astray than one who follows his desire, without guidance from God? God does not guide the wicked people.
(Al Quran 2850)Had We wished, We could have elevated him by it, but he stuck to the Earth and he followed his desire. His example is like the dog, if you scold him he pants, and if you leave him he pants; such is the example of the people who deny Our revelations. Relate the stories, perhaps they will think.
(Al Quran 1767)The difference between animals and humans is that we are supposed to be able to control our desire ...