Marriage & Divorce

You call the widespread published academic translation I posted as "horrid", but your own personal internet translation is so jumbled and confused that I have no idea what it says or means. What irony! Before you decide to start translating the Quran into English, at least study basic English grammar LOL Widespread by and for the ignorant! 2221 And not marry you the idolater females until believe... And not marry you the idolater males until believe they. Why can?t you comprehend basic stuff?

Salam aleikum! I wondering what says the Quran about marriage? Some verses Determining mutual attraction/compatibility Ascertaining whether the potential partner is of similar beliefs/faith Discussion of and agreeing to the level of dower and other terms (if any) Understanding and mutual acceptance of marriage as a solemn/strong oath/contract If male, capable of providing for the family/household To have physically matured / post-puberty If the marriage is unsuccessful, one should also be capable of undertaking divorce proceedings, e.g. separation period, arbitration, discussion of settlement etc .

Peace, As far as I have understood the marriage according to 43 is to save the orphans, especially during the harsh era in which the Quran was revealed. However, I guess this marriage is a bit "special" and not the usual one. It is definitely not to sexually or socially please the men, that is not the God I know to allow that. It might be a temporary contract to allow the women to stay under the same ceiling for protection and sustenance. Polygamy as per traditional understanding is not something sanctioned by God. God bless you

Peace, Not all Christians are idol worshipers, although a majority are, as are most Muslims. God bless you

MsDee i thought about you the other day--its been pretty warm here the past few days, maybe in the 70's...and ive been wearing a black leather jacket around. you know i hate the heat and i was just thinking about being wrapped up in a hijab--and its not even full blown summer yet--and then i thought about you being on the west coast and wrapped up in hijab, lol. then i read Aamers comment about the ninja girls in AZ. phew that is sacfricing a lot of comfort, more power to all the women who wear hijab in ridiculously hot places, all joking aside muscle I was reading that this year will be the hottest summer in West Costs history, I hope I survive lol. I don't even wear the veil, just the scarf on my neck and chest, and I feel I'm burning up already. Must take some serious will power not to nudge at the scarf to let in a little air from time to time. More power to them though, I admire their dedication.

Well, you have postponed your break up with your family. People who are ready to do what they say are far from being commendable and I am sorry if it sounds harsh because it is your family, unless it was just threats and they hoped with just the threats you would buckle. If it wa so, they have succeeded without great expenditure. If you know them enough to know that it was not just threats, well... as I said at the begnning, you are postponing something that will happen anyway, may be not with a gentle bangladeshi but may be with somebody who is their match, or you won't find anybody like that and it will be just your bad luck. So do not involve any girl, but cut the out. It is inadmissible. You will be your parents toy till they die. Salaam

LOL! I agree there mmkhan...those are things you learn just in every day conversation with someone. It's not like they are interviewing for a job. -Amina Peace Amina, True! I agree handshake May Allah bless you, mmKhan

Are you guys communists or fascists? rotfl Are you trying to establish some (new) universal laws? ??? Don't you understand that the Qur'an speaks to each and every one on an individualistic, personal, and intimate basis, and that everyone should read it for himself and God will grant him knowledge according to his own rank and perception? Some followers of the scripture wish to lead you astray, but they only lead themselves astray, without perceiving. The only sin God does not forgive is idol-worship! O you who believe, you should worry only about your own necks. If the others go astray, they cannot hurt you, as long as you are guided. To GOD is your ultimate destiny, all of you, then He will inform you of everything you had done. Baruch Hashem!

When I read this I wanted to punch the person who wrote it. Can't remember where I originally read the article though.

all I can read is, she is behind your money and GOLD rotfl

Avoid troublesome! Respect one another and live with love.

She probably not loving you anymore. Respect her decision.

You have to be vocal, honest and true.

In my marriage life, I really avoid complications.

After I got married, I lost my privacy because all must be shared.

If Allah is with her, then marry her. For Allah is with those who are hunble and patient and shows endurance at times of testing periods; darkness will not shroud their faces; they are always peaceful, smiling and pleasant looking; and they are free from pride and prejudice; they shall not engage in arguments over what is truth; and they would fulfil their obligations whenever they make a promise. But for Allah's help and nearness such guided pleasantness is impossible. You do not have to ask your date on her beliefs. Well you know well by now, whether she is with Allah or Allah is with her or not. Go ahead and marry then.

I think this topic has not been discussed in this part of FM. 2235 Free_Minds And there is no sin upon you if you openly propose marriage to these women, or you keep it between yourselves. God knows that you will be thinking of them, but do not meet them secretly, unless you have something righteous to say. And do not consummate the marriage until the required interim is reached in the Scripture. And know that God knows what is in your souls, so be aware of Him, and know that God is Forgiving, Compassionate. The Qur'an says that about marriage proposals. Let's discuss how it diverges or converges with current practices, traditional (hadith/regional customs) or secular. One thing I do not find is that the Qur'an does not say anything about getting families involved. Or rings and ceremonies. Salamu Aleikum i just wrote a post inhttp//free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=9602478.msg294230;topicseen#msg294230 in my understanding the marriage-greement called nikaa a written contract with any receivables by the spouses Witnesses (at least two) a dowry (height not set) 4.25 That's all. No ceremony, no rings, no expensive celebrations ....and no family ;D peace

Peace be upon you all, I have been having relationship problems with a Christian girl that I have been dating. Our different belief systems never conflicted and in fact, we have had many talks about God. Matter of fact, it seems that I am more knowledgeable on the Bible than she is. We have known each other for some time and promised under God that we were married (we don't believe that the institution is necessary) and to treat each other as a spouse. We called each other husband and wife and her parents expect us to get married. She finished college (I am almost done) and she returned to her native land late last year. We kept contact with each other and long distance was never a problem. As a matter of fact, I told her to feel as if I was always with her in spirit regardless. I would wake up an hour early before work to talk to her and even skipped on studying so that I could accommodate her time difference. I even helped her with her English instead of focusing on my work. In a relationship, for me, the spouse takes priority after God. We talked about this many times and she agreed to it. She has a passion for kids and she even told me that I took priority over them. After she got a teachers position fulltime she began to spend more time with her children. I felt strange even before she got the job and would ask her where I stood in regards to her priorities. She never gave me a straight answer and said that she loved both kids and me equally. When I asked her 4 months ago, I had to pry it out of her. She then said, "I have to tell you honestly, I do not know if I can live without kids." I had my answer, even though it was unspoken. I have tried talking to her and try to understand her, but she all she says is "I'm sorry." or acts as if she has no idea what is going on. The week that we had the fallout, I told her that I was coming to Korea and she replied with, "What for?" as if nothing happened. Communication has thus been scarce for the past 4 months, with only 1 sentence replies from her. She was supposed to come earlier this month on my birthday/graduation. She told me last minute that she was coming in "late June". I sent her an email 3 weeks ago, a full page, and again a one sentence response, "I am sorry that I was hard on you, hope you are doing well" and added "I am coming with my students and teachers." Shes one of these Christians that has "visions" from God. One was to open a school in Africa for Christians. I questioned and asked why only for Christians? Later, a new vision, it should be for everyone! Later I asked, "Why in Africa? People suffer right here!" Then she said God gave her a new vision, to be anywhere! She also tries to go to church everyday at dawn, this is a practice in her native land. She comes back next week and we are supposed to talk. She has destroyed my spirit, murdered it basically. The way she responds digs the knife deeper. Her nonchalant attitude makes me feel as if I am an enemy or a stranger. I saved myself for one person my entire life. I even told her this but all she said was "I'm sorry". Can anyone give me some advice on how to go about it? Can someone give me Bible and Quran references? Peace be upon you Give her some space. meanhwile you move on. Maybe you are coming too strong on her. Anyways she may realized that she has other things she wants to do in life. never get attached to a women to the point where you can not live without her. Women sometimes go through phases but she may need some time and space. Meanhwile move on and don't make her think u are desperate. Women like men who seemed to have other options. They need a challenge.

Hi Acubens I can vividly imagine the tribulation the 2 of you must be going through and I empathize with you. God does tell us, in the Quraan that a believing woman should marry a believing man, so a good start would be for you to read the Book, in order to qualify for yourself what a believing man is, and also to find out if perhaps you already are such a man, or if you could become one without violating your principles. I was once a very aggressive Atheist and it only took three pages of reading the Quraan to convert me. You being a Theist should only need a page and a half to arrive where I arrived ;D. I wish both of you guidance and wisdom from the Most Merciful, Who knows our innermost reaches. pr Btw. I also met my wife on the internet and had this instant connection, which is an excellent basis for a rewarding marriage. ;D Hello Acubens, welcome I agree with GROAN. Very nicely said, MashaAllah. mmKhan

''salamun'' alaikum. sure al baqra.2/222. 2/223. sure waqeya 56/58.59